My Mother's Visit

    

November 9, 2008 by JohnM  
Filed under Feature, John Miele

They arrived in Manila and we had to go straight to Quiapo market to buy wedding provisions. Unfortunately, it rained that day, and, as those of you familiar with Manila know, Quiapo turns into a river when it rains. So, what do I do after we get parked? I plop my mother down in a tricycle to go shopping in the rain. Needless to say, both she and Bob were a little bit shocked to be wandering around in the market and riding a tricycle in 1 foot of water! Welcome to the Philippines! A Picture, so you get the general idea:

Quiapo in the rain

After returning to our house, the jet lag caught up with them, and we turned in early… Our flight to Tuguegarao left early the next morning. We took them on a tour of Cagayan and a bit of Ilocos Norte before the wedding, over a couple of days. Here’s a map of our route:

Shot of the Cagayan River from the plane

On landing in Tuguegarao, I took it slow, stopping to let them take pictures and really “see” the country. Several things stuck in their minds:

1. The sheer number of tricycles in Tuguegarao (It really is amazing for such a small town!) Add in the “comfort” factor in riding one!

2. The fact that everyone stopped, waved, and smiled.

3. Drying palay and corn on the road.

4. The heat. They live in Florida, but the heat really got to them. Both work in IT, and go from an aircon home to aircon car to aircon office. I think they really were surprised at how hot and muggy it gets here. My mother was on the verge of heat exhaustion much of the time, and I stopped for water whenever I could. (I got a bit concerned at one point.)

5. The veracity of the Filipino mosquito.

6. The attraction and joy of the simple life. This really surprised me too. More on this in a bit, but I think that they were surprised that places like this still exist.

7. The fact that your dinner may have a name before it is cooked.

8. How really close Filipino families can be.

9. The mostly untouched beauty of the Cordilliera and Sierra Madre.

10. Riding the banca across the Cagayan River.

11. Seeing all the carabaos.

12. Seeing the kids in rural schools, and just experiencing being around these kids.

13. Being stared at in areas that don’t see many visitors, and certainly not foreigners.

I drove up the National Highway from Tuguegarao to Abulug, and they stayed at a very small hotel in Pamplona: The only one with aircon rooms withing 30km of Abulug. Rebecca and her family were very nervous about them coming. Understandable in Rebecca’s case, being that she met her mother-in-law for the first time. But what was her family worried about?

Well, it comes back to an issue of money, social status, and class. I reassured them that there would be no problems. However, the family was worried that my mother would think poorly of them because they were poor. I will say this… Before we left, my mother said, “You know, I am almost envious of Rebecca’s family. No dysfunction. Everyone gets along. Everyone is happy. They really have something money cannot buy.” In my mind, this one statement says it all.

The next day, I drove them further up the National Highway to Claveria and Pugudpud. Pugudpud is starting to get some resorts and visitors, mostly from China, but Claveria is still just a small fishing village (Really, Pugudpud hasn’t changed all that much either.) The National highway between the two towns is steep, very twisty, and the scenery is dramatic. The road curves along the top of cliffs that plunge straight down into the sea. Both Claveria and Pugudpud have “white” beaches and lagoons for swimming. In Claveria, the village sits on the remnants of an old military base, built by the Japanese. While in Claveria, we saw the fishermen returning with the day’s catch, their wives waiting on shore. Simple life. Simple pleasures. This (white beach, palm trees, nice people) is what many people go look for in the Caribbean or Mexico, or Tahiti. In those places, over touristed and “modern”, that simple way of life no longer exists. How could a tiny island not change when a cruise ship discharges 2,000 passengers at once? This vision of paradise still exists and is very real here in the Philippines. It just needs to be searched for.

The day before the wedding, both Rebecca and I had some running around. Becky’s Aunt took Bob and my mother on a walking tour of Pamplona, introducing them at City Hall (They didn’t want to be a spectacle, but you sort of follow the lead) and stopping by the school to hear the kids practicing songs for International Week. After picking guava, rambutan, and okra in Becky’s uncle’s garden, we had to run to Aparri to the bank (everything is paid with cash up there… NO ATM’s except in Aparri). Since time was short, we took the ferry (banca) across the river… Yet another uniquely Filipino experience. You pass through a mixture of rice paddies, jungle, and fishing villages before reaching the other side of the river. This way is quicker than driving by one hour (From Abulug, you need to drive south to Lal’lo and the bridge, then north up the opposite river bank.) Tricycle and then ATM and a quick lunch.

Finally, they experience our wedding and the uniquely Filipino customs surrounding the ceremony. Again, this trip was an adventure. For a first trip to Asia, they were completely off the tourist trail. I hope they have pleasant memories of the Cagayan Valley and the people there. When my mother first arrived, she was shocked at why I would choose to live here. After her experiences in Manila (unavoidable, given our time constraints), I understand. After going to the province, I think she sees what I see. I will eventually live in Cagayan with my wife by my side. My mother and Bob already are thinking of returning to this “Paradise found”. Some pictures:

Local transport

Claveria

Drying palay

Ferry in Aparri

Becky and I at the ferry dock

Claveria fishing village

Church in Alcala (Just north of Tuguegarao)

Carabao keeping cool

About the Author:  John Miele is a Citizen of the World, having spent time in many locations around the globe. Currently, he finds himself in Manila, but travels throughout the Philippines. John joined the Live in the Philippines Web Magazine in mid-2008.