What Lolo Jim Taught Me About Moving to the Philippines

James Young Duncan II was my mother’s grandfather. He was born in Scotland back around 1890.  Of course we didn’t call him “Lolo,” that’s Tagalog for “Grandpa.” I don’t even know if my grandpa ever met anyone from the Philippines, or even had any interest in the Philippines, but he was an international traveler in his own small way, something a remarkable number of Americans can’t figure out how to do.

I know little of Lolo Jim’s actual background in Scotland, I believe he was from a working class or perhaps what was then service class background.  I’ve seen an old family picture of him on the seat of a two-wheel pony cart, with an older man, and from their dress I think thy might have been grooms or stablemen.

Things weren’t good in Scotland at all as my grandpa neared adulthood.  Money and jobs were tight, the nation (Great Britain, which Scotland only grudgingly [as in force and occupation] was apart of) was engaged in an horrific war in France, the world was poised on the brink of a flu epidemic that was to kill people in mammoth numbers, and jobs were certainly hard to find.  (Hmm, sounds a bit like today in some respects).

But Lolo Jim didn’t hunker down in little government-provided shelter somewhere and wait for King George to solve his problems.  He heard of this land called the USA where one could ‘live his dream’.  Without a lot of forethought he gathered up a substantial pot of money for those times, journeyed to Liverpool, England, and hopped on a ship bound for the ‘promised land.’  I don’t know where the money came from, but after paying his passage he still landed in the USA with $100 cash money, which was a pretty tidy sum in those days.  According to his immigration record, Lolo Jim went directly to a “boarding house” in Kearny, New Jersey where thousands upon thousands of other Scottish immigrants settled.  Many found work in several of the large Scottish companies which flourished there … American Nairn Linoleum Company, later the Congoleum Nairn Company, (if you have any sheet vinyl

or vinyl tiles in your home, chances are they made them) or Clark’s Thread, also still in business today, the major manufacturer of thread for 165 countries).

But mill life wasn’t for Jim.  I’m not clear on what he did for the short time he was in the US, but it’s very clear he suffered greatly from ‘Culture Shock,”  among other things, language difficulties,  even though both countries allegedly spoke English, if you ever tried to have a conversation with my Lolo Jim you might well have tried Tagalog instead of English. Chances of understanding each other were about the same for most people. (Tis a braw brict moonlit nicht the nicht).

Most of his money gone and all of his enthusiasm, my grandfather packed up what he had left and boarded a ship back to Scotland.  The ‘promised land’ having failed miserably to live up to its ‘promise’.  Unlike many seem to think, even today, making a trip from one country to another to ‘try the waters’ is not an all or nothing affair.  I can just imagine how many friends and family back in Scotland laughed at this young man, who had left with great hopes and then returned, obviously disenchanted with the country he thought would be a better place.

But Lolo Jim didn’t let the laughter and derision worry him much. Unlike a lot of people, he tried, rather than endlessly ‘think about trying,’ and for that he knew his life would forever be richer.  Even on its own that little vignette night be worth some thought and consideration, but of course the story didn’t end there.

As young men sometimes do, Lolo Jim met a woman who caught his eye, fell in love and married.  Pretty soon it came to pass that a baby was on it’s way.  Lolo Jim and my Lola Kate talked things over, weighed their options, and the options for their still to be born baby, and decided to try the USA one more time.

Bad economic times, war, epidemics, world in turmoil, uncertain economic times … wouldn’t it be a good time to wait and see?  I’m sure my grandfather received lots of advice along those lines, but he and his Kate made up their minds and once again left home and hearth to travel to Liverpool and thence Ellis Island.

They almost waited too long.  My grandmother was so far along in her pregnancy that the steamship company gave them a hard time about boarding her (according to family legend, anyway), but somehow they were convinced that she would wait until after the ship docked to deliver, and they set sail.

This time Lolo Jim had substantially less money to his name, but the couple still went to the same location, Kearny, New Jersey.  About a month after their arrival, a little girl named Elizabeth was born, my Mom.  She was always known by family and friends as Betty, in another little Scottish – Filipino parallel, her first name was actually Mary. Had she been born in the Philippines her birth certificate probably would have read Ma. Elizabeth, and that second and final trip of Lolo Jim’s is probably the reason I am as US citizen rather than a British Subject. The couple had plenty of ups and down over the years, they even ran a hot dog stand for a couple summers on the boardwalk in Asbury Park,  reminiscent of couples thinking of moving to the Philippines and supporting themselves with a little restaurant, but eventually all was well, they eked out a satisfactory middle class existence and by the time they passed away had the greatest of treasures one can hope for, a family of successful children, with children of their own, making their way in the world.

My mother relayed to me a story which makes this even more ‘moving to the Philippines’ related.  At his funeral, after more than 55 years in the USA, relatives from the ‘old country’ sent messages of condolence and hope.  Several people mentioned how they wish they had followed Lolo Jim’s lead and made the move back when they could have, and several clearly indicated they were glad they had stayed in the homeland and wished that Lolo Jim had too.  She brought this up during a conversation about pleasing relatives as an illustration of why that goal is impossible: you can’t please them all.

So, if you read this far, thanks for following along.  My only message or advice is not to convince you to move to the Philippines, it’s not for everyone, and the decision can only be yours and yours alone.  The message is, though, don’t let it be a decision of the magnitude some make of it. It is not a once in lifetime thing or an irrevocable decision, planes fly both ways. And remember, “More is lost by indecision than by wrong decision.”  Or so Dave (and Carmella Soprano) opines.

Home Sweet Marilao

As I am sure most of you have already realized, “Editor Bob” suggested all of us who contribute to the Live in the Philippines Web Magazine write an article on our ‘home city’ here where we are living in the Philippines.  Sounds like a pretty good idea to me, ‘Where should I live in the Philippines?’ is always a big topic of interest, so these articles should help.

My wife Mita (the Unofficial Cook) and I chose to make our home, at least temporarily, in the municipality of Marilao, province of Bulacan, in central Luzon, very close to the NCR (National Capital Region), commonly called Metro Manila.  You can learn a bit about Marilao and Bulacan province by visiting their web sites, unlike just a few years ago, an amazing number of communities now have web sites and the first step in learning about any place you are thinking of is to look for their official web sites. They vary greatly in quality and usefulness, but at least give you a starting point.

Our good friend Wikipedia tells us this about Marilao:

Marilao is a 1st class urban municipality in the province of Bulacan, Philippines. According to the latest census, it has a population of 160,452 inhabitants in 22,363 households. In 2007, The City of Meycauayan and the town of Marilao in Bulacan province share a slot in the list of the world’s 30 most polluted places in the developing world drawn up by a private New York-based institute. In its report, “The World’s Worst Polluted Places” for 2007, the Blacksmith Institute said: “Industrial waste is haphazardly dumped into the Meycauayan, Marilao and Obando River system, a source of drinking and agricultural water supplies for the 250,000 people living in and around” the Meycauayan-Marilao area.

I added that pull quote in first, because Marilao and neighboring Meycauayan are known around the world because of the quoted Blacksmith report.  Might as well get the bad news out of the way first.

Bulacan, in US terms, is sort of the New Jersey of the Philippines.  It’s quite industrialized and must once have been a horrible place to live back when it was the tanning center of the Philippines.  There are no tanneries left, or at least I have yet to smell one. The rivers mentioned are polluted, as indeed many rivers in the Philippines and elsewhere are. The government has an active program in place to identify pollutant sources and rehabilitate them, but in my estimation that program does little.  I don’t swim in those rivers, buy food from them or drink from them.  It’s just a fact of life and how these particular towns  earned their ratings on the report I will leave to the experts.  I mainly just mentioned it as sort of a preemptive strike before someone writes me, as many have, and says something like “OMG, how can you possibly live there?”

The answer is, we manage living here just fine … It’s nothing like, for example, living in Jersey City or Bayonne or Rahway New Jersey (or anywhere in the Los Angeles basin), for example.  It is what it is.  Marilao is much less industrialized than it once was and is now quite a “bedroom” community for Metro Manila.  A great many residents here work in the NCR and commute, either by car, 45 minutes to many points of Manila via a modern, world class toll way, or by Jeepney or private car service (FX).  We are far enough out in the province that there are no taxis or buses here, but still conveniently close to Manila.

So why did we move to Marilao, of all the many places we could have chosen in the Philippines?  I’d say the two biggest reasons are family and convenience.  First of all, Mita’s family (father mother, one sister, one brother and our two favorites nephews) are still living in the family home.  I promised Mita years ago that we would come back and spend time with her aging parents before the inevitable comes, and unlike so many expats (I feel sorry for so many of them) I get along great with my married family. To say that they treat me like a king would be an understatement.  I am really blessed, favored and have prospered in that sense.  Just one example that helped make the decision for us, when we had a date set, my father-in-law walked the streets for days until he found this house for rant, and then worked with the landlord to get several crews in here and fix the place up from roof to

yard work.  We move in to a spic and span house with a working toilet, lights turned on, a shiny new water tank, everything but the furniture.  If you’ve ever rented a house in the Philippines you know how rare that treatment is.  Landlords in the Philippines tend to do nothing at all for incoming tenants.  With treatment like that, how could we go elsewhere for our starter home?  We pay 7,000 pesos a month for rent, for a three bedroom, single bath house on it’s own lot.  Similar rentals are available most of the time for 7 to 10,000 a month.

One thing to note, a lot of people write to me and ask, where are the places in the Philippines most popular with foreigners to live?  My answer to that is, I don’t know of any in particular.  There are a lot of foreigners here. I never go to the mall without seeing other foreigners, and I see them in every place in the Philippines I have visited so far. Often far from big cities.  We who spend a lot of time in the online world tend to think we are getting the ‘big picture’ if we visit a lot of blogs and Yahoo Groups, but the truth is, in my opinion that we ‘online people’ are only the very tip of the iceberg.  I meet foreigners day in and day out who never show up online and have no interest in doing so, so when you read sites like this, you are only getting part of the overall picture.

The second reason we’re here right now is convenience.  We are walking distance from an SM City mall.  When I was in the US I hated malls. I’d go out of my way to avoid them, but when you live here, especially in a provincial location, you’ll find a mall is a real outlet to the outside world,  it’s our place for entertainment, food (both groceries and eating out), banking, bill paying, in fact most of our daily needs.

Also, adjacent to the mall is one of our main reasons for wanting to live here, a dream which is currently on hold, a planned North Rail terminal.  The Philippines once had a working rail network and a major line passed right through Marilao.  A few years ago the government received a  huge loan from China to rebuild a modern light rail service on the old right of way.  For reasons I don’t really know, that’s all on hold right now, but someday we may still be on rapid transit leading to all the major areas of Manila.

Until light rail materializes, we make do with our own car (and yes I drive, wouldn’t live here without a car), the modern NLEX toll road which goes south to Metro Manila or north to Angeles City and Subic, and Jeepneys and private car services.  Jeeps run right past the end of out block, 24 hours a day now that so many people commute to call center jobs, takes 30 or 40 minutes to their terminal at the end of the LRT, one of Manila’s existing light rail lines, and costs about 50 cents.  Or you can hop a tricycle, 40 to 60 cents to take you to one of several FX terminals and ride in a van with aircon to the city for about $1 USD.

As far as stores, restaurants, gyms, theaters, doctors offices, dentists and such, there are many, often in walking distance, but more and more we go to the mall for that too.  There is a local hospital with emergency room and basic services across the street from the mall, and larger hospitals on the way into Manila if you need a higher level of care.

There are a number of private schools in the area, some must be adequate, a neighbor’s son graduated high school last term and went right into LaSalle University in Manila.  Many people send their children to Metro Manila private schools (by private car service, though, there are no public school buses I’ve ever seen in the Philippines).  As Tommy recently pointed out it costs more for transpiration than for the school itself for some of his relatives.

I’d say that pretty much covers things, except I really should talk about the 500 pound gorilla everyone tries not to talk about, the ‘nightlife’.  If you go along any major highway, like MacArthur Highway, near out house (it’s where the mall is, actually) it will look like atypical bustling business street,  If you go there after dark you will see bars, videoke bars, ‘girly’ bars, just plain bars, and dozens of street vendors.  Many think the sex trade in the Philippines is confined to ‘sin cities’ like Angeles City or Olongapo and Subic.  Nothing is farther from the truth.  In addition to the bars, there’s a ‘short time’ hotel every mile or two.  This is a fact of life here and if it is something that gets you all upset and nervous, this is not the place for you.  In general, this is typical of every built up area I have been in in the Philippines. To me, it means little because I typically am not even out after dark, but it’s better you hear the straight truth from the beginning, in my view.

Will we stay here in Marilao long term?  Not likely.  My wife has a farming property up north in the province if Zambales, and our current plan is to build and relocate there next year.  After that, we may acquire another place or two elsewhere in the Philippines, because for me, at least, there is no one good place, there are a lot of places where I can be happy.

Hope this has been of some help, and if you have specific questions, you can always contact me through the Contact page up in the top menu bar, or preferably put your question in a comment below so that others can learn from it too.

photo credit: harry07

Positive Or Negative, Where Do You Fit?

I was pleasantly surprised at the reaction to my recent article  Why You’re Reading About the Philippines. In particular I’m glad that no one took my examples of how repetitive and cyclical our always present world and national crises are … so many things today sound the same as when I listened to the radio at my mother’s knee in 1949 or 1950 or so … my mom would have been glued to CNN 24×7 if she were around today (except when a Mets game was on).  She was a bit of a news junkie I would have to say.

Frankly, although we get the International edition of CNN here in the Philippines, which is head an shoulders above the drivel you suffer through in the US-only version, it is still a pretty horrible thing to watch for more than 15 minutes or so.

It is often said, often in a humorous or even critical sense, that Filipinos are “drama queens”, and as much as I can be an objective observer, I would have to agree.  Even what seem like small, trivial events are often blown up to tremendous proportions in the Philippine media … only to die down and disappear without a trace in the next few days.  We in the US of course share this tread to some degree, but the overwhelming impression of an outsider is, drama is certainly a ‘queen’ here in the Philippines.

But if drama be a ’queen’, what or who might be the ‘king’?  For me, that’s one of the few ‘easy’ questions left in this world … it is negativity.  Watching the nightly news is often a little game to me as I watch the ‘talking bobble heads’ try to find a negative aspect to nearly every item they report.  A few nights ago I saw an interesting report on the first quarter 2009 ASEAN countries’ economic performance.  The Philippines was up in number one in a great many of the categories.  In a number of cases the Philippines blew Singapore out of the water (for reasons I don’t yet fathom, Filipinos seem in awe of Singapore … a swampy little mud flat about the size of Metro Manila, with virtually no resources, which depends heavily on imported Filipino talent in things technical or artistic and creative, to a degree I probably won’t understand if I live here another hundred years … that’s a story for another day).

My point is, the newscaster and the Philippine government official being interviewed prefaced every statement with ‘weasel words’ like, “of course trouble may yet come to us,” “you can’t really say that the Philippines is performing that well because the other country’s GDP is artificially depressed by the global crisis’, and a lot of other almost sickening apologia for being in the lead.

But the tendency for the Philippines to always think of themselves in last place is not my main point.  As an American I see plenty of this tendency today in my fellow Americans.  Instead of showing the world what we, as a country can do, and digging in and doing for ourselves what we really are capable of, we seem to have fallen into a sullen, passive aggressive mode of being sorry for ourselves, and like our Filipino brethren, giving up on today and pinning out hopes on some nebulous time in the future when things will come right again for us.

I had this driven home to me pretty solidly a day or so ago when I read the blog of a fellow I have been reading for some time.  He’s a former computer industry tech person who changed careers to follow his dream … he always wanted to be an airline pilot.  Quit his job, mortgaged his house to finance his training and is now in the ’big time’ … or semi-big time.  He’s a first officer flying small jets for a regional US airline … working long strange hours and struggling up the ladder in the face of continual threats of layoffs (‘furloughs’ in the airline industry), and making his way, in general, in the typical American Dream path so many of us are used to reading about … at least back in better time.

What set me off on today’s essay though was a blog entry he made about packing his suitcase where he used an illustration of his pilot’s flight bag complete with a prominent ‘bumper sticker’ advocating the defeat of President Obama in the next presidential election in 2012. (Photo by permission, Geek in the Cockpit)

Now don’t get me wrong .. and don’t sharpen up your political knives.  This blog isn’t about politics and I don’t want to discuss it (for those who just have to know I didn’t vote for either Obama or McCain and I have absolutely no interest here, in 2009 who might be on the ticket in 2012).

I did, though, fell saddened and a little sick to my stomach that this otherwise positive, hardworking and ‘with it’ person would figure it was worth his time, three plus years before the next election, to put his day-to-day efforts into carrying around ‘anti’ banners this far in advance.  It’s as if we, the US, his chosen and problematic airline industry, and the unsettled world, with many people wondering where they are going to live or where their next meal is coming from, would feel that anything ‘positive’ will be advanced by wasting time campaigning against someone who can’t even run for more than three years.  I mean what are we for?  Being against someone can’t change a thing.

Recently there was a large rally in Makati (Metro Manila) against what would amount to another term of the current president.  Never mind the fact that constitutionally she can’t run again, and has given no indication she wants to, is this the most effective use of time, talent and money to advance a progressive cause?  Nonsense.  Wouldn’t it make sense to find a candidate who would really do something  for the country and boost up support for him or her?  I mean who cares who else runs in an election as long as the best candidate (in your opinion) wins?

Folks, trust me on this.  It is infinitely more powerful and efficient to be for something rather than against something, no matter what country you live in,  Not only is this something I know intuitively and from experience, but interestingly enough, in today’s troubled economic time, it turns out that negativity is a major factor in destroying efficiency (and thus leads to lost jobs).

You might want to read this article  “Negativity: The Number One Productivity Problem“.  I’ll highlight just a couple of facts from the article:

Fact #1  It may not be healthy to be negative but it’s natural. Human beings think over 60,000 thoughts per day and 85% of those thoughts are negative. Think about the little voice in your head cursing traffic or saying things like, “I dread going to work,” or “I can’t stand my co-workers.”

Fact #2  What you focus on expands. Cognitive scientists and neuron-psychologists know that the brain actually changes as a result of where a person focuses his thinking. Negative habits create more negativity and positive thoughts create happier feelings which lead to health.

Fact #3  Feeling good is good for your health. The American Heart Association reports that feelings of appreciation increases circulation and smooth cardiovascular rhythms. Also, recalling an angry experience can negatively affect the immune system for as much as six hours?  …

Fact #4  Relationships are either a source of renewal or a source of drama. It’s a fact, the number one reason an employee leaves a company is due to poor relationships with his direct supervisors. It is a fact that over 90 percent of workplace problems are people related. The Gallup organization found that no single factor more clearly predicts the productivity of an employee than the relationship with his direct supervisor.  Drama in the workplace hampers productivity and the number one problem in most workplaces is negativity and stress.

If I had to characterize the comments and feelings of the vast majority of folks I deal with every day, foreigners or Filipinos, “Negativity” would have to be right up there at the top of the list.

Many foreigners who aren’t yet living in the Philippines have trouble holding a conversation without the “I hate my job” or “I can’t stand American women” feelings gushing out.

Those foreigners who live here continually bombard me with “The Filipinos are all after my money” or “The taxi drivers all cheat me” and similar thoughts.

Many Filipinos are no different.  I ask someone about a government project I have heard of and the stock answer is “Oh, that can never push through, it will all be eaten up in graft and corruption.” or “There are no opportunities for Filipinos unless they go overseas” and so on.

What do you think?  I mean, where do you focus your thoughts when you are thinking consciously?  I was particularly taken with Fact number 2, above.  Could it be that we really build and continually rebuild our own brains?  Is the ‘lucky guy’ just lucky, or is he just another sad sack who consciously worked on the problems in his life and recreated his own bran?

Something to think about, I think

Why You Can't Live In The Philippines

Boy that’s kind of a negative sounding title, isn’t it, Dave?  And besides, who died and left you in charge … where do you get off telling me what I can and can’t do?

Of course I’m not in charge and of course I can’t tell you what to do… I wouldn’t even if I was able to.  But that title just sort of came to mind this morning when I was reading some mail I had answered in the past and remembering some of the many conversations with several thousand (over the past 10 years or so) folks who had 10,000 reasons or more why they can’t make the move and live here in the Philippines.

I’m a great believer in a line that is attributed to Henry Ford… a young man who started out poorer than you and I put together and died as one of the richest men in the world in addition to the ‘minor’ accomplishment of putting the world on wheels.  Said Henry, “If you think you can or if you think you can’t, you’re right.”

Over the years I’ve talk with roughly 8 times as many people who “think they can’t” as I have with people who “think they can.”  One reason for that disparity in numbers is, many of the “think they can”… let’s just call them the ‘can’ folks, shall we … don’t need to talk near as much as the “can’t” folks, because the “cans” often just make up their mind and do it.

The “can’ts” are often trapped in that modern malady of our times, “paralysis by analysis.”

• Gotta find out the answer to every conceivable detail in excruciating detail.
• Gotta reconcile all the discrepancies, one guy pays PhP50,000 a month for rent and another pays 10,000 a month for rent … Danger, Will Robinson!
• Gotta have a “real” job within easy commuting range of my house
• Gotta live where I am sure I have coverage under Medicare, even if I am only 40 years old
• Gotta live only where my friends and family “understand” … I don’t live my life for me, I live through them.
• The list goers on, ad infinitum

The real truth is, prices vary by where you live, what terms you decide to take and what terms are even available in the first place.  Last time I was in the rental market back in the USA, things weren’t very much different at all.  There are places available nearly anywhere to fit nearly any budget, but if you haven’t enough confidence in yourself to only sign up for what fits you, I’d submit you are placing yourself well into the “can’t” camp.

In today’s world, where you earn a living has nothing to do with where you live … unless you want to keep things status quo.  Finding a conventional J.O.B. (Just Over Broke) in the Philippines can be hard … but why do you need one?  Look at the newspapers and the TV reports every night.  People even with “old line” companies have no “job security” …  job security is a myth anyway.  Earning you own living is likely the only safe “career path.”

Medicare coverage is indeed an issue, and I’m a lot closer to it than the majority of you reading this, but even so, who cares?  Are you going to live as a ward of the government, being shuffled around to suit the whim of some bureaucrat, or are you going to actually “live” your life, instead of starting your death planning in your 40’s?  Frankly, both my parents died, in part, because of the horrible way elders in the US are treated under Medicare, so I don’t spend a lot of time looking forward to that “wonderful” government benefit.  If I get caught up by some horrible illness in the future, I’ll deal with what happens when it happens.  When my dad passed away, 13 years ago, a contributing factor was being shoved out of one Medicare-assisted nursing facility into another, cheaper Medicare-approved facility.  Even all those years ago, the weekly bill for the cheaper facility was more than my wife an I spend for a month to live here in the Philippines … so am I going to live my life based on the “tender mercies” of the US Medicare program?  In the end, we’re all dead anyway, I prefer to live the time I have left with a little more pleasure and dignity, thank you very much.

So what’s my point?  What’s the answer to the question in the headline?  Why can’t you live in the Philippines, if you wish to? Here’s how to find the sure and certain answer.

Get up from your computer right now, walk to the closest mirror and ask the person staring back at you.  No one else can make the decision for you, and no one else really controls whether or not you can make the trip now, next year, in 20 years or whenever.  You aren’t “forced” to stay in your current situation by any third party, you are the deciding factor to live here or never live here.  God bless you with an informed choice, not an artificially forced one.

If you think you can or if you think you can’t, you are right.

photo credit: Zellaby

Realistic Expectations

A subject that interests me is the modern day concept of ‘rules’ and the way we deal with them.  I guess part of my outlook is shaped by the fact I spent so many years with the military,where you don’t ask why, you do.

A day or so back Bob pointed me to a humorous but also slightly troubling post of a blogger he and I both often read, Market Man Manila.  The gist of the story is, Market Man (MM) went to the supermarket to buy some groceries and started his shopping with one of those express lane hand baskets.  When he was ready to check out, the special hand basket lanes were all backed up but several of the regular ‘silver’ shopping cart check stands were open, so MM marched up to one of those empty lanes and was told that since he had a hand basket he would have to fall in line in the hand basket lane. “Why”?  “It’s the rule, sir.”

photo credit: nateOne

Now certainly on the face of things that seems a stupid rule.  I won’t argue ‘for’ the rule for a minute … were it my store, I’d abolish the rule instantly.  But as the clerk tried to explain … as one of the lowest level employees in the place, she had been instructed to follow the rules, under penalty of termination … period.

Again, the logic behind the rule escapes me … but the logic of keeping a paying job in a country hobbled by massive unemployment and poverty does not escape me … maybe a lot of people out there were born a colonel or some such rank and never made their way up from E1 trying to raise a family on a pittance, outranked by everyone they see.  It’s pretty easy to berate low-level staff who might be worrying about feeding their kids when you have a good paying job and money in your pocket.

MM went on in his often humorous but also somewhat bitter and demeaning style to relate for several paragraphs how he essentially considered this employee dumb because she could not explain why the store had the rule, and when a supervisor was eventually produced, the she too could not explain why the rule was in place.

Quite frankly I think the story was a bit disingenuous … the way the problem was finally resolved was that MM got a regular ‘silver’ cart, transferred his groceries to that and left the store, original mission accomplished.  Rule or no rule, this is the way I shop often … thinking I need only a few items, then transferring to a regular cart when I discover I really need more … I learned the transfer trick from just watching other shoppers, MM has lived here all his life, I can’t believe this technique wasn’t familiar to him as a matter of course.  This story is similar to a lot of expat stories I hear, when at the end, one has to wonder was the person’s original intent to buy groceries or to waste a lot of time and emotional energy in proving (to someone, maybe himself) just how smart or important he is.  The fastest way to get through the day, in my book, is to keep your eye on the prize … I really don’t care who thinks I’m smart or who thinks they ‘got over on me’ as long as have my groceries in hand and am headed home …

The comments to MM’s post are quite extensive, many from other Filipinos and almost overwhelming agreeing with the tone that suggests the lowest paid employees in the store are ‘dumb’ because they can’t rattle off not only what the rules are, but an explanation of the rules.  Seems a bit much to me.  In the military we would have said, “the reason for that rule is above my pay grade, sir.”

MM, for personal reasons keeps his true identity private, but I believe he is a high level executive for a company in the financial field.  Banking and finance are just full of rules like the hand basket/silver basket issue that caused MM’s heartburn.  Even though he’s a senior executive, not a low-level work for wages employee, I’d make a bet I could walk into his office, read a few memos and company manuals and in only a few minutes find some ‘rule’ that he himself would have trouble enunciating an explanation for, contemporaneously, on his feet with someone obviously angry sticking his nose in his face and demanding a fast response.

I really think that every one of use operates inside a set of rules every day that we can’t come up with an instant explanation for … even the ones we like we can’t always explain.  Why does the bank insist you endorse a check in a certain way.  Why does McDonald’s stop serving certain items at 11 am when many other dining establishments have breakfast all day long?  The list could go on, but I think my point is clear … there’s a corporate or government reason behind every one of those rules, but how many of us are prepared to give an impromptu explanation?

Would you feel good about yourself if you went into a McDonald’s at 11:01 am, ordered a breakfast item, get told that breakfast hours were over, and then spent who knows how many minutes of your precious time demanding the 16yo at the counter on her very first job explain the rule?

Frankly, I’d feel kind of embarrassed and sad after I came down off my high horse … almost like a bully you might say.  Their counter girl in McDonald’s and the checkout girl in the SM Supermarket didn’t make the rule and neither one has any idea of what corporate level decision went in to deciding ‘cut off hot cakes at a certain hour or serve them all day?’  ‘Checkout all types of baskets at a certain checkout, or restrict to certain ones for certain checkouts?’

Why would the rank and file be expected to discourse on the reasons for the rules, when they get paid a pittance to wear a silly uniform and accept whatever comments and criticisms a customer wants to sling their way?

Seems a bit unrealistic to me ..what do you think?

Why You're Reading About the Philippines

I’ve had this post sitting around “un-done” in my drafts folder for some time.  Today I was housecleaning (disk cleaning) and I decided to make something out of it rather than giving it the old heave ho.

It’s my thought that many of you are reading here for many different reasons, but the various reasons can often be lumped into one general category … entertainment.  Let me be quick to say there is nothing wrong at all with any of these particular sub-categories, but perhaps giving a little thought to why you are really here can help make the experience a bit better for you and even to get a little more out of the Live in the  Philippines Web Magazine and the efforts of those who make it happen.  I’m including a broad category of things in ‘entertainment’:

• Diversions - Anything that makes you forget the pain of your “little life”.  Hmm, to call most people’s like “little” sounds a bit demeaning, but then again, we all of us are pretty much just small cogs on some giant wheels.  I myself sometimes get a bit sad  with some of the interactions I have with folks who are in the “Interested in the Philippines” group because there are many out there who come across, to me at least, as being very unhappy with their lives and have somehow focused on the Philippines as being the one spark of hope that will someday make them feel happy and fulfilled.  Everyone needs to believe in something, but if this is you … something I have learned the hard way in this life we all share … if you are unhappy in country X or country Y, you are very likely to be unhappy here in the Philippines as well.  One thing you can definitely do, right now, today at a cost of absolutely nothing, is to start looking for the important things in your life.  Changing countries won’t fix what’s wrong, only changing ‘you’ inside will.  Don’t let the diversionary thought of “someday” making the move blind you from the fact that personal unhappiness usually climbs right in the box with the rest of your possessions when you move … wherever you go, there you are.
• Distractions – Anything that provides an easy-reason to not deal with what is in front of you.  This is the one I certainly identify with very strongly.  If I let myself slip into the “woulda, coulda, shoulda” mode there’s no doubt I could have made the move here way sooner in my life and been a lot more settled in already.  If you’re just dropping by to pass the time for a while, no problem, glad to have you.  But if you think for sure you want to make the move and you aren’t doing something, each and every day to make the move happen, leave now, go directly to your “to do” list (you do have one, right?) and get a couple items crossed off before you come back.  Distractions cause more delay and difficulty than any of the commonly stated problems like money, health, family and such ever do.
• Aggravation – Reading news or views that make you mad or get you jacked up (many find this a great pick-me-up in the afternoons at work, I’m told). Some of us seem totally driven by dissatisfaction.  If this is you, I can’t really say you are in the wrong place, but then again, please don’t try to drag me into it.  In general terms my life is quite satisfactory …has been for years.  I really don’t care who is in the White House, or in Malacañang Palace for that matter.

You’d be surprised how in my view, after 60 years of being aware of the news and how the world is being run, things aren’t really all that different.

I clearly remember President Truman address the nation about why we had to fight again in Korea to ‘make the world safe for democracy’ and get those rascally and aggressive North Koreans under control once and for all … good thing we accomplished that goal, eh?

I also clearly remember President Eisenhower making speeches and even radio commercials telling us that “We Auto Buy Now” to pump up a tottering auto industry which couldn’t figure out how to sell cars that Americans would buy.  Check that problem off too, we fixed it, didn’t we? … or was that our current leader I saw  other night hawking long-term auto warranties backed by the federal government?  … naw, that must have been a dream from the past.

My point is, not to discuss current politics, but to try to help you see that the more things change, the more they stay the same.  If you are really unhappy about how the world is being run today, or any of its particular countries, instead of getting yourself all wound up, just relax and take a deep breath.  Things are going to change, but in the long run, they pretty much all even out.  Regardless of how strongly you feel about politics, social injustice, religion or any other “shibboleth” you may be personally attached to, a move to the Philippines is unlikely to make and difference, pro or con.

A week or two ago I read a comment to one of Bob’s articles about stress.  The fellow making the comment was in the US and the way he worded his concerns he really made me feel quite sorry for him.  He was terribly concerned about “the horrible way the US was being run right now” and how life as we know it was probably in a death spiral … and even sadder he seemed to feel it was his personal responsibility to save us all from the impending crash.

Thank God I don’t have any immense responsibilities like that weighing me down … I’m just a little grain of sand on a gigantic beach myself … only a few other grains of sand even know I am here, and when I’m gone, very few will even know it, much less care.

OK so, that’s a few of the reasons I think some of us are reading (and perhaps writing) about the Philippines.  Did I hit any chords that resonated with you?  Or am I all wet and crazy as a mad hatter?  Anyone care to share why they are here?

photo credit: Amarand Agasi

Credit Where Credit Is Due

Everyone who reads one or more of my articles knows the term “curmudgeon” fits me pretty well.  I try to call the shots as I see them and if someone is providing poor service or doing something really dumb I am certainly not shy at pointing out the problem.

But I’m not an unfair person, so when some business provides service that is “done right’ and even delights me rather than annoys me, it’s only the “right thing” to give credit where credit is due.

One of my pet peeves (and actually it’s more than just a peeve, Philippine businesses alone lose billions because of this simple error) are companies who refuse to answer emails.  This is especially apparent to folks thinking about visiting the Philippines.  They see a hotel or resort online and it looks like it might be a good place for them to stay, so they write for more information or to make a reservation and guess what?  The email just goes off into space … no response is ever made.  Now we know that there are technical glitches with email from time to time, but it’s actually pretty reliable overall.  We can surmise a lot of those businesses set up a way for clients to email them and then just refuse to take the time to answer.  It’s bad business.

This week I’m heading to Davao City for a few days with my wife and sister-in-law and two little nephews.  On my own I often don’t bother with reservations, if one hotel has no rooms the next one will.  But with several folks in tow, especially young children, better to have a roof over our heads in advance.

The first place I contacted, intending to stay there overnight is the beautiful Malagos Gardens which is located in Davao City but way out of the town proper, in a nature preserve/watershed area that is simply lovely.  The resort has a number of different price range cottages in natural forest setting, nicely manicured grounds and excellent food … I had lunch there last time I stayed in Davao.

They have a website and of course an email method for reservations, so I shot off a request … making a mental note that I would have to call in a day or so, because I “knew” I was going to get no response.

When I’m right, I am right and when I am wrong, I am wrong, and I was happy to be wrong this time.  An email came back in less that 24 hours from the Malagos Garden Resort marketing staff.  Prompt, direct and to the point.  Kudos to Michelle and her team there.  Can’t ask for better service than that … world class.

On our second night I wanted to try the Linmarr Apartelles and Suites in central Davao City.  I haven’t been there, but I thought I’d give it a shot, they are centrally located, convenient to shopping and the waterfront, having a kitchenette and dining area makes it much more convenient traveling with young kids than eating three restaurant meals per day, and (tip to other hotels who would like better bookings) they offer free airport pickup/drop-off and advertise their WiFi Internet access up front so people don’t have to search and ask … welcome to 2009

I sent off a request from Linmarr’s reservation page and I did not get an email response next business day.  Instead, a couple hours after I sent my email on a Friday afternoon (expecting a response on Monday), my phone rang (actually a rare event for me . Who was it?  Cheryl from the front office at Linmarr Apartelles and Suites, calling to confirm my reservation, get details on what sort of bed arrangements we wanted and get our arrival flight information for our airport pick up.  Again, I suppose one could ask for better service, but I am at loss to figure out how.  Kudos to Cheryl and her team – world class performance again.

Last but not least, many will recall my ‘Buy a Mailbox” article a few weeks back.  Remember I said that if the PhilPost mail carrier made it to my house two consecutive months in a row with my credit card bill, on time I would buy a lottery ticket?  Well, a week ago … 9 days before the due date, PhilPost was at the gate with the envelope from BDO … can’t ask for better service than that, now can you?  Thanks PhilPost.

Oh and I made good on the lottery ticket … bought one and it hit.  No, not the grand prize, but how many Lotto tickets ever win anything at all?

All in all, a pretty happy week for the ‘old curmudgeon’ … if things keep happening this way I’ll lose my official curmudgeon stripes.

photo credit: mrwhitepatch

Assume You're Right, Then Go Ahead

My namesake, Davy Crockett, has been credited with the saying, “Be sure you’re right, the go ahead”.  Wise words, but a bit to definitive for me.  If I waited until I was sure I was right before making a move, I’d still be back in elementary school.  It’s nice to be sure of yourself, but especially if you come here to live in the Philippines, it’s just not possible.

I prefer my interpretation, which I picked for today’s title.  I think things through to the best of my ability, ask advice from the best sources I have available, and then I go ahead and “git ‘er done”.  So far it has been working pretty well for me. (and yes I know about the well known cautions regarding ass and u and me, but I live my life, in company with the majority of my friends and associates, in the real world.  We do our best to be right, but we can never be sure, and when you are as sure as you can reasonably be, we go ahead and do it).  Some folks, instead, sit on the fence waiting until there are no assumptions left in the equation … and last I looked they are still sitting.

I wanted to speak about a couple common threads I see over and over again in this Web Magazine community, in other online sources for Philippine information and in personal conversations with many fellow foreigners over the years.

Language: I want to ask a favor here.  Please read the next sentences.  I greatly admire Bob and the others I know who are studying one or more Philippine languages.  I also would be first in line to state that your life here, whether on vacation or long-term living would be enhanced by learning a local language and especially being able to speak it well enough to talk with people on the street regularly.  The reason I asked you to pay special attention to those preceding two sentences is because I have been trapped by statements like I am going to make next … if people didn’t read my preamble.  You do not need to learn any language before you come here to the Philippines.  This does not mean I am critical of those who are learning … just that you do not need to know any other language other than basic English skills before you come to the Philippines.  Learning the local language is a great benefit and again, I highly recommend it … but I see far too many people waffling and vacillating in their decision using language as a “go – no go” part of their decision process.  It really isn’t as big a deal as you think.

Health Care: I think many many folks are on the health care ‘fence’ in deciding on a possible move here than possibly any other issue.  Especially in the USA where we have the 17th or so ranked health care system in the world (check the WHO rankings), yet by far the world’s most expensive.  It’s certainly not up to me to tell people to ignore this issue, but I also see a tremendous number of folks who would probably love living here denying themselves the chance to even give it a try because they are paralyzed by the specter of life without US health care insurance and especially without Medicare.  A couple facts you might want to consider to help balance out the continual scare talk you hear from groups like the AARP who exist just to get rich off seniors being overcharged for health care in the US.

• Many US health plans will cover your medical care here.  You have to deal with the plan itself to find out your true limits, not the hearsay and the ‘what happened to Joe’ stories that circulate on the ‘Net.
• Almost all medical care here is on a cash basis, but you can deal with this in advance by having some savings … not a bad plan even if you don’t get sick.
• For those eligible for Medicare … many seem to get confused when they run across the fact that Medicare does not pay for services outside the US.  (actually, they do cover short-term emergency care outside the US, such as a person getting ill while on vacation … check the information with Medicare directly.)  A number of folks I know have confused the fact that Medicare won’t pay overseas with the notion that if you live, long-term overseas, you aren’t covered by Medicare.  This is not so.  You would have to return to the US for procedures or hospitalization … but you are still covered by Medicare no matter how long you live outside the US … Medicare can’t dictate where you reside, only where they pay … an important distinction.
• I have a health plan that covers me here in the Philippines.  So far (knock on wood), in three years I have yet to spend enough to even come close to the plan’s modest ($300 per year per family) deductible, so I can’t even tell you how fast they pay, etc.  I don’t say ignore the issue, but I do say that health insurance is blown way out of proportion by many.  Make sure your caution is not really an excuse for putting things off.

Doing Things On Your Own: This could be a big blog post, or even several all by itself … but I’ll take just a nip out of it for now, because I think it holds a lot of people back.  First of all, let me state that I am eternally and immensely grateful to my loving wife and her wonderful family.  If I had come there on my own and lived my life every day on my own I would miss their support big time.  But do not for a minute think I couldn’t get along on my own if I had to.  I’ve had people ask me, “You went and did such and such on your own”?  Almost as if it was flying to the moon or something.  You are xx years old.  You’ve been getting things done for yourself ever since your mom sent you to the store the first time on your own.  This is a foreign country, but it’s not another world … you’ll do fine. There are even times having a Filipino along ‘looking after you’ can get in the way … the more people you need to try to explain what you want to, the harder it gets … much like the old kids game of “telephone”, where by the time the message gets back to the start of the circle, no one can recognize it.

• Going to a government office?  Take your time, read the signs, ask for help.  In my experience, even government clerks are nicer to foreigners than they often are to their fellow Filipinos.  Just make sure you are rested and have time and be patient.  You’ll be pleasantly surprised what you can get done on your own.
• Going to buy something and worried about the all too familiar warnings about jacked up prices for foreigners?  First of all, if you buy in large, formal stores like in a mall, the price is going to be marked anyway, so what’s the issue?  If you are going to buy something in a local market or informal setting, do your research and ask around before you buy.  If you are offered a price that sounds out of line, first tell the merchant … with a smile works best … “Oh no, that’s way more than I planned to spend.”  If he makes a decent counter offer, buy, if not just walk out … there’s always another place to buy it.  I’m sure there are times I paid too much, I also know of many times my family or neighbors have been very approving of my bargaining skills.  It the long run it will all work out just fine … especially if you are pleasant and smile a lot .. even if it’s a phony smile (I didn’t just type that, did I? LoL)
• Give the other person ‘wiggle room”.  The mistake we Americans commonly make is being too abrupt and “cut and dried” about things.  The world isn’t going to end if it doesn’t happen “right now”.  Also, even if the other person is dead wrong, and you know they are wrong, and you have every right to insist they admit they are wrong, remember something you have in your ‘hip pocket’ which costs you nothing but a little pride … monetarily.  (don’t worry, you’ll get your pride back, most of us have an inexhaustible supply).  Just relax, make chit chat and let the person in the wrong work things out in their own way so that they aren’t forced to admit their error.  Believe me, this is one of the things I have personally ‘stubbed my toe” on plenty of times, but it’s one of the easiest mistakes to avoid if you just remember something … is it your object to prove the other person wrong, or to get something done so you can move on?  It’s absolutely amazing what you can get done if you keep your eye upon the goal, rather than playing the “I am right” game.

Okay, that’s a few of my tips to think about, particularly if you are one of those readers here who is “on the cusp” of making the decision to come to the Philippines to visit or live, but just don’t now if you can do it.

My answer is, yes you can do it … decide what you want to do, assume it will work, and do it … my guess is you’ll be glad you did.

photo credit: cliff1066

The New Philippine Cartographers

Did you ever see someone’s idea of “cute” in a sign (usually one prohibiting something or another (where they use a grouchy looking person or a cartoon character staring out at the world and saying “This Means You”)?

Well for years I have been right at the forefront of people who complain about not being able to find decent maps of the Philippines … and I notice that unlike many of my half-thought out Quixotic (sometimes Idiotic, but we won’t go there) quests, I have seldom marched alone.

The state of maps here in the Philippines has been poor to say the least.  The The National Mapping and Resource Information Authority (NAMRIA), the government agency entrusted with this vital part of the country’s resources is, shall we say doing a sub-optimal job (I’d give you a link to their website so we could both read what they are up to, but the site has been loading now for more than 15 minutes and I do have other things to do today).

Recently, I have seen a lot of progress on the part of Google … some of you may look at the maps I frequently link to my blog posts, there is now a lot more readily available online and Google has even begun to recognize place names in the Philippines … the country is definitely coming out of the dark ages and getting “on the map”.

Full credit to Google where and when it is do … I’m smiling as I type this because Bob and I were just discussing another aspect of the services Google provides to us all and we both sort of share the same attitude that Google isn’t always the benevolent giant it sometimes appears to be. Still in all, you have to give credit where credit is due.

All the technical expertise and server horsepower that Google brings to bear on a problem, though, is really worth absolutely nothing if there is no information behind it.  Here’s where the folks in the interesting article I am highlighting today come in:

New cartographers

RALLY de Leon, 38, likes to map out uncharted territory.

In the early days, he used paper and pencil. Nowadays, he goes around the city with a global positioning system or GPS device¯sometimes mounted on his helmet¯as he rides a bicycle around the city, recording tracks that he will later upload onto a mapping program.

He takes a car or a motorcycle on some of his mapping trips—and sometimes, he just walks.

The hobby helps De Leon in his business, a small courier service that delivers bulk mail¯such as bills and bank statements¯to addresses east of Manila. … read the full Manila Standard Philippine mapping article here.

Now in addition to the fact I thought the whole volunteer effort was newsworthy in itself, the (not so) hidden reason I focused on this today was to issue a challenge … to you and to me as well.

We all want better maps, it seems and we all realize that better maps won’t only help tourists, it will help businesses and government units do a better job as well.

So just what are you doing with that spare time that sometimes seems to weight heavy on your hands?  An excuse to invest in kewl new technology, to travel and explore and then even have something to show for it at the end … sounds like one of those rare win-win-win situations to me … what do you think?

I May Have to Buy a Mailbox

I’ve written a number of times in the past, I am sure and certainly on my PhilFAQS blog about the abysmal mail service here in the Philippines.  Even though we Americans sometimes almost make a comedy career out of complaining about and dissing our dedicated US Postal Service workers (anybody remember Men in Black II?), your attitude will almost certainly change if you make the move to the Philippines.  There is a postal service here … (The Philippine Postal Corporation) they go by the name PhilPost and for a few things they seem to do quite well.  But if you live in the provinces, as I do (even though only a few kilometers from the Metro Manila border) mail service is a luxury you are liable to miss a lot.

Not long ago, our bank, BDO, sent us an unsolicited credit card for my wife and an add on card for me.  Unlike the US, there’s essentially no recession and no credit crunch here, (so far).  I never applied for a credit card in the Philippines and I essentially didn’t want one, because the consumer protection laws here are totally different than in the US … in the US you essentially can’t be defrauded out of anything with a credit card, here, if you, for example lost your card, and someone used it?  You shoulder the whole amount.

But anyway, the bank sent, so we “bit” and decided to keep the cards.  We activated them and used each one just to be sure the system worked.  Then, it occurred to me after some period of time had passed, that we had never gotten a bill.  After a long series of phone calls … all at our expense … we finally got a dismissive response from a BDO supervisor, “Oh we don’t send bills out to the provinces, you will have to call every month to find your balance, it’s your responsibility to find out what you owe.”

You can pay at the bank, if you already know your balance, because the banking system and the credit card system are not able to talk to each other, or you can allegedly check your balance via your online BDO bank account (in 6 months I haven’t been able to get the credit card registered so it shows up in my on line account), or you can pay “in the blind” at some bill pay centers … but a real live credit card bill, online or off line … “not in the provinces, sir.”

Our account is dues on the 27th of each month, so on the 26th of April I called, ascertained the balance, went to the local branch of the bank, filled up the required forms and paid the balance due from our bank account.  I don’t have a checking account here, that would be another whole blog post in itself, but with enough prompting and a multi-part form or two, the lovely ladies at the service counter will tickle their keyboard for you and transfer the funds electronically.

When I got home from the bank, I saw something white sticking in our “people” gate as I was opening the driveway gate.  We don’t have a mailbox at the gate because I have only seen a mailman four times now in nearly three years … few other people on our street have a mailbox either.  What was the white paper?

A real live credit card bill fr0m BDO, complete with something I have never seen yet since I moved to the Philippines … a bright red 4 peso officially approved PhilPost postage meter stamp on the corner of the envelope.

It appears that while I was away at the bank, a real live letter carrier came by and put a real live official piece of legal PhilPost delivered business mail in my gate.

I’m going to the mall right after I post this, perhaps I should buy a mail box to try to entice the letter carrier back next month?  Maybe if I make it like the one in the picture people will stop and take pictures of it?

I dunno, but I know this, if the letter carrier shows up again on 26 May, two months in a row, I’m going to run, not walk to the Lotto ticket counter at the corner store and buy a handful of lucky tickets.

Many of those things we take for granted in the US are a real blessing.  When I see US news shows here in the Philippines i sometimes get a little depressed because the talking bobble heads on camera make it sound as if the whole country has fallen apart.  If you’re one of those folks back home who have heard so much gloom and doom you are feeling bad yourself, shake it off and smile a little bit.  There are a lot of things to be thankful for in the US, one of them even is getting your bills delivered *smile*.

photo credit: srqpix