Let Sleeping Dogs Lie

My girlfriend, a Filipina, will hear me use American phrases every so often that I just keep presuming everyone has heard.  They are common phrases to me.  Her version is sometimes a bit different, such as her phrase, “I see the blind man.”   (as opposed to, “I see, said the blind man.”)  Her way of saying it makes me laugh so, I just go with that.  So when I used the phrase, “Better to let sleeping dogs lie.”, she looked at me strangely and asked what I meant by that.  So I told her, “Well.., if a situation is doing just fine as it is but could create problems by messing with it.. it’s better to not mess with it.  Just leave it alone.”  So now she uses the phrase, “Don’t wake up the sleeping dogs.”.  Close enough.

It was my fifth day at my new studio, my fifth morning waking up here in the Philippines.  And one thing I’d taken notice of during the first four days were the many street dogs roaming around.  I love dogs.  Cats.. eh, not so much.  But dogs are cool.  The street dogs I see are not in the best of shape, but I’ve seen far worse in Mexico.  Here the dogs seem to scrounge up something here and there from the trash people leave out at night to keep body and soul together yet another day.  A bit skinny, not the best coat of fur.. but no mange that I’ve seen as yet.  Probably full of fleas but.. I’d be too if I lived out on the street 24/7.

Sleeping Dogs

Sleeping Dogs

So, during my first four days of walking about town I’d occasionally come across some dog during the heat of the afternoon and he’d be taking a siesta out on the concrete or alongside the road somewhere.  All the street-dogs I’ve run into here are just interested in some food, sex and sleep.  They aren’t violent.  They don’t snatch my groceries from me.  They are fairly laid back and usually travel in packs of three up to fifteen I’ve seen at a time.  So as I’m ready to enter the mall, I’m walking up the cement steps and there is this dog.. dead.  Everybody is just walking around him, going in and out of the mall as if he weren’t there.  I’m thinking either security or the janitor should have noticed him by now and carried him off.  But no.. he was laying there on his back.. legs sprawled out, motionless with his chin upwards not breathing.. not moving, laid out dead as a door-nail.  So I got closer, hoping to see if maybe he was still alive.  Nope, no signs of breathing.  Still, just to be sure, I said to him, “HEY!!.. Doggy, you OK?”.  He slowly turned his head.. looked at me and went back to sleep.

What the heck?  That was the first time this had happened, either back home or in the Philippines.  Three more times over the next few days I saw a dog lying on the side of the road or next to a business.. stretched out like he’d fallen out of the sky.. seemingly dead to the world and then.. he’d scratch his fleas with his eyes closed and go back into his deep slumber.  The dogs I see back home don’t sleep this deeply!  Dogs in California will wake up in a heartbeat to the slightest sound.  Especially at night.  But even the occasional night-sleeping dog I’ve seen here doesn’t even give me a glance as I walk by.  My theory is the humidity.  It must suck to be in fur all day with this heat and humidity.  My guess is the dogs around here are just more laid back and deep-sleepers than California dogs.  Back home you worry about some random dog going for your throat.

So.. getting back to my fifth day here on Mactan.  It’s a bright, early morning and I’m actually awake before 9am ready to get some breakfast in town.  I turn my corner from the studio and there lays one of the dogs that lives amongst our collection of studios.  “Hey.. Doggy.. time to wake up.”  He was laying directly in my path and I didn’t feel like walking in the wet grass around him.  I didn’t want to startle him out of sleep.. he might freak out on me.  So, I said a little louder.., “HEY!!  Doggy.. you’re in the walkway!”  Still nothing.  Wow, this dog was really, really a deep sleeper.  I figured I’d gently touch his hind leg and hope he didn’t go nuts on me.. so I gently tapped him with my sandal.  That’s when I heard a bunch of flies start buzzing around from underneath.  Whoah.  He was asleep alright.  The ‘Big Sleep’.

Join Expat Island

I looked around but none of the caretakers were around to report this to.  “Not my job.”, as a renter is all I knew.   My neighbors still seemed to be either asleep or had already departed for work.  I began to wonder how long it might be before this is taken care of.  A day in this heat and he could get pretty ripe.  I grew up in the country and I know that smell can waft along for miles.

But.. I was still hungry so, I walked through the wet grass and found myself some breakfast in town.

On my way returning home I started thinking about the doggy again.  Poor doggy.  But, in a better place now.  At least that’s what I’d like to think.  There’s another dog that lives around here, I feel bad for him too.  He’s the only dog I’ve met who has bronchitis.  He coughs, hacks and even barks with a hoarse voice from it.  I’ve had bronchitis several times in my life and I know how much that sucks.  Not much I can think to do for him though.  He wanders in and out of the subdivision randomly, but I know his cough-bark even late at night in the dark.  Plus, that’s how the whole slippery slope starts.  Before you know it I’d be like that lady that lived 2 acres down the street from me back home.  She had over 35 dogs, about just as many cats and a possum with a broken back that lived under her sink that she fed every day.  Twice the Animal Control people have carted away her ‘babies’ and twice she re-filled her acre with a new batch.  I went to her home to fix her computer one time.. it had the most gawdawful smell in that place.  But hey.. she’s still single if any of you are interested in a woman who really likes animals.  And the kicker is.. she works in the local school cafeteria.

A day doesn’t go by that I don’t see either some random street dogs or several of the five or so that seem to think they live here.  Even while writing this one of them made his nightly rounds to my screen-door looking for scraps.  I don’t like keep food in the trash because it attracts bugs so, any leftovers I leave out for the first doggy or bad kitty-kat that comes along.  Leftovers don’t last more than an hour before one of them comes by and makes a quick snack out of it.  I’ll even bring home a plastic bag with the fish and chicken bones from when I go out sometimes to leave on a flat rock where the drain pipe water hits the patio edge.  They never leave a trace, not even anything for the ants.  It’s a symbiotic arrangement.. good for me, good for doggys.

As for the cats.. there’s this pregnant Momma-Cat that seems to think I’m it’s owner.  I’m no idiot though.  I know she’s pulling that same scam at two or three other houses.  Even so, I’ll give her scraps when she does her annoying ‘meow-meow-meow‘ routine at the screen door.

I’ve written before about the ‘Pros & Cons of Making New Friends’.  Sometimes you meet new people and it turns out they are lifelong friends.  Other times you meet people only to realize through repeated behavior that they only see you as a meal-ticket for their expenses and whims.  I’ve had to distance myself from several people like that even in these last two and a half months here.  But, Mactan is a small island and you eventually cross paths with the same people again.  I’m not accustomed to that sort of awkwardness.  Back home it required effort to make time to see my friends who were spread out over all of Southern California from San Diego to Los Angeles.  And if by chance I didn’t want to associate with someone any more it didn’t take much effort to just not see them again.

But Philippine island life is not like that.  You tend to see the same people over and over again.  Last week I ran into some people I’d distanced myself from because every time I’d see them they asked for money.  Money for transportation, money for lunch, for dinner, for strange fees they owed their employer.. so many stories and few were likely to be true.  I didn’t want to just turn a cold shoulder to them (in my estimation) and so I was courteous enough to say ‘hello’ as we met in passing and made some small chit-chat.  I was thinking a few congenial words and we would part ways without any weirdness.  But no.. the same paradigms went into play once again and within minutes they were asking for money again.  By the time the whole incident passed it left a smudge on my otherwise perfect day as I once again had to be the ‘bad guy’ who had to keep telling them, “No”.

It’s hard to break old habits.  It’s tough for an old dog to learn new tricks, as they say.  I was raised to be as courteous to people as possible, despite any former misunderstandings.  But lately I’m finding that sometimes you just gotta stick with your original gut instinct.  Some people only seek to subtract from your life without contributing anything back in return.  That’s just who they are.  In such instances, rather than ‘play nice’ perhaps the better, more efficient thing to do in such a social situation is to simply take my ball and go home.  Just leave the situation alone to prevent creating even more hassle.  Go on about your business, enjoying the simple pleasures the islands have to offer.

Sometimes, it’s just best to let sleeping dogs lie.

Post Author: Henry Velez (10 Posts)

Henry Velez is a recent (2012) addition to the Philippines and brings with him a fresh set of eyes as well as a talent for bringing his first-hand observations clearly to the reader. Motivated by both a life-long passion for writing, as well as for a Filipina he met in the US, Henry dove right in and made the move to the Philippines 'sight unseen'. He currently maintains three blogs, one which is devoted to his adventures here, and is currently working on a fictional novel set in the Philippines. We wish him the best of luck in his new adventures!


Comments

  1. Gary Wigle says

    “I see” said the blind man… To his deaf dog… As he stuck his wooden leg out the window to see if it was raining… That is the rest of the story… :-P

  2. Boss says

    Its all good Henry, we live and learn. No matter where you go in the Pines there are many common threads. Being asked for money is one if them and it never ever stops.
    Many years ago i took three of my wife’s cousins to dinner one night, all single mums. I wanted to get to know them better since they all lived within a few houses from each other and plus they were hot looking babes as well. Well within virtually minutes the requests for help by a money donation began. Money for all sorts of reasons and most requests were fairly understandable. The only problem was the tallies in my head were building up and my wife had another 30 or so direct cousins and no doubt any money advances would open up the flood gates. Luckily I held my nerve and explained why it was mot possible to help them.
    Well that ended any future correspondence and in retrospect it was a good result.
    What was strange about the evening was that all three barely touched their food. I knew that Pinoy food is not the most delicious food around but all not hungry?? It ran contrary to everything I had seen of Pinoy eating enthusiasm.
    Then at the end of the night when the waiter came around the three girls asked to put the 6 virtually untouched plates of food in doggie bags. I asked my wife if they didn’t like the food, no she said, the food is going to feed their kids at home. Amazing I have never seen such dedication, then again those girls never saw dinner with me again.

    • says

      A friend of mine says she encounters the same situation when she visits family back in Nicaragua. And she says that many of the requests are completely legitimate.. real people with real problems. But I’m learning that no matter what at some point we have to say, ‘No.’.. even to the real issues because most of us have some finite amount of money we have to live on. I like to help people in need, but I don’t make enough to be the beneficent philanthropist doling out money to everyone who truly needs it. It would only take a half dozen requests per week to leave me flat broke. And what I’ve found is that once you say ‘Yes’.. the next time they seem to need more. I can’t fix everyone’s problems, I have my hands full with the lives of those closest to me. That’s just the reality of life.

  3. Fred Cariaga says

    It`s a very common practice in the Philippines for relatives,neighbors & acquaintances to ask for money specially from someone who come from the U.S.They think money grows on trees in America.You either say no or be prepared to be the ATM of the whole town.Welcome to the Philippines!

    • says

      I’ve met some other people since then who don’t ask for money. They run their own little business (a chicken skewer place, very small). Very nice people. But, yes.. it’s something that comes up on a regular basis according to both my short experiences here and speaking with my g/f.

  4. Bobby Harmon says

    Eventually when you leave Mactan you will expose yourself to many begging styles. Wait until you run into the begging mafias from Southern Mindanao and Zamboanga. They go to different towns around the Country and their begging involves children in tattered clothes. mothers carrying babies and all the other tear jerking scenarios. You should only wish to have their bank account. But if I were in your shoes I would 100% Ignore all this stuff as you probably do back where you are from. Ignore the dogs, cats, ducks, goats, beggars as it is all irrelevant unless you make it relevant and then you will drive yourself nuts seeking meaning to it and you can’t change it anyway. No one in the Philippines (except your GF) really cares about you or your feelings. They care bout what’s in your wallet and the sooner you realize that the even more enjoyable your stay will be even more. Your still in novelty stage.

    Having traveled in so many countries I have lost track but, I see the Philippines for what it is and what it isn’t is an exotic country filled with mysticism and ancient history . It is a relatively new country having been influenced by the worst of mentors, the Spanish and then the Americans. Before that it was basically a Country of Malays but most of that has been lost. Yea if you want a nice dance go see the Maury or Igorots but that is for tourism. Sad but true. What the Philippines it is is a great and wonderful country to meet beautiful women and even to raise a family as Mr. Martin and many others have done successfully and also to make some nice acquaintances. But culturally please. Don’t get me wrong, I love the Philippines absolutely, positively and I have an absolute blast every time I go. But I do things on my terms now. I learned the hard way being nice and helping people out but the more I did the more taken advantaged I was then I decided to visit with a different set of rules based on these experience some of which you are experiencing now. Let sleeping dogs lie and in this case that sleeping dog is the Philippines. Sorry to be so long winded.

    • says

      I’ve seen this sort of thing in Mexico and dealt with relatives asking for money (my ex-wife was born/raised in Mexico), and all this years before coming to the Philippines. For me it’s kinda ‘same story, different background’. I try to take each person on their own merits though, I don’t want to presume ‘everyone’ just sees me as an ATM. But one thing that has helped is, as you say, “taking it on my own terms”.

      As you pointed out, the standard of living is so widespread it would literally take Billions of dollars to address this problem for even one or two major islands, let alone the entire Philippines. Let me check.. .. nope, I’m running short by several billion. I like it here. I like the food, the cheaper economy, the weather (much more interesting than SoCal) I like seeing cute women in short dresses everywhere I go. I like the polite society (for the most part). I like that I can afford more time to devote to my novel. But.. I’m not here to ‘save the day’. I believe in being helpful when I can, but I’ve got expenses too and I don’t have a network of family here to look out for me.

      So.. I take it all in, enjoy it for what it is and keep reminding myself that the Philippines got along fine without me before I arrived and will continue to do so after I’m long gone. As they say, “Life goes on.”

    • says

      I could identify with Bobby Harmon’s comment above. BTW, I hate dogs and cats roaming in the streets. But I have a pet dog named MIKO at Chateau Du Mer Beach Resort here in Marinduque who is bilengual ( understand both English and Tagalog commands). My wife and I treated him like a child. He eats both Filipino and American food. His favorite food is my wife’s mango pancakes. He is a good guard dog, He would not bark at short and small Filipinos , but when we have guests who are tall and fair skinned, he growls and is ready to bite. So when we have foreign guests in the beach house, he is tied almost all day. Regarding request for money, please do not feel guilty if you say NO! Good Day and Cheers!

  5. says

    p.s. In Mexico it gets really gritty with the begging scenarios. Some parents have even broken their own baby’s legs into deformity to gain sympathy while begging. I’ve seen 9 year olds do the fire-spitting routine in traffic to get a few pesos. Others just reach into the car at stop-signs to steal purses or kidnap your children while at the ATM for a quick emptying of your account. I spent a lot of time there for years and the things my Uncle would tell me (he was in undercover Immigration for 14 years and later in DEA).. it’s incredible the horrors people resort to for money.

    This is one distinction that made me choose the Philippines over Mexico, even though I know the area and speak Spanish. Mexico has a pervasive drug-cartel presence that affects everyone’s life. People are ruthless there. In the Philippines, yes there are the heavy-handed religious factions in southern Mindenao.. but I don’t live there. And yes there is some sex-trade going on, but mostly in the Angeles area and surround provinces, plus I have no children here. Other than that, the drug route passes mostly on ships, not on land which keeps things fairly peaceful compared to the warring cartels in Mexico who literally kill over every square block they can claim.

    All together, I prefer to take the Philippines over Mexico any day of the week.

  6. mike coyne says

    Henry,

    I hope you do not let others learning experience jade your perspective. Yes there are plenty of differences between the cultures of the US and the Philippines. God knows after 20 years of being married not only to the Fiiipina but to the Philippines (by mariage) I do believe I have seen them all. That does not take away the beauty of the way our cultures in realtionships blend together. I have made plenty of mistakes in hind sight but have had a great deal to learn. My wife and I have spent countless hours talking about how to handle situations which only brought us closer together. She learned that I cared for her and people in general. I learned when to help and when to say no and live with the results.

    It sure brought back good memories hearing you and your girl with the differences in sentence stucture. I only wish I would not have teased my wife about these sayings. I found it to be cute but the Filipina can be a sensitive and they learn real quick when they get upset! Keep on sharing your experiences with us. For me it brings back fond memories!

    • says

      Whether in life or love, I truly believe a sense of humor makes everything easier. :) She teases me too about my learning curve on local, Filipino phrases. Most recently the term, ‘hubble-hubble’. Apparently it not only is a term used for transportation but also has another, more adult, connotation. ha! Meanwhile I just keep my eyes and ears open to the whole adventure of it all.

  7. Chris says

    AMEN Brother!!! I hear you loud and clear. There is ALWAYS someone asking asking, with new stories each time… Sometimes they forget the same relative has died about 3x already. LOL

  8. amapangarap says

    just ignore the people asking for money, its that easy. btw, this also happens to us filipinos, if people sees your a bit well off, people will start asking/borrowing money. I guess its only more prevalent with foreigners since lets face it, girls that most of you are involved with lives in poverty.

    as for the dogs, i have seen one sleeping like a boss in the middle of the street. damn dog wont budge no matter how hard i blow my horn that eventually i had to go around him.hehe

    • says

      Yep.. my Filipina g/f is fairly wealthy and, prior to meeting me, used to give away money left and right out of the guilt her family would lay on her. To make it worse, they’d squander it and come back for more. Now that I’ve come into the picture I’ve taught her to focus on her Mom, her own life and her children as her first and main priority.

  9. Miss August says

    I hate irresponsible pet owners. If a person can’t afford to have their pet neutered/spayed and give minimal care, they really shouldn’t take on the responsibility. I have two dogs and they are part of my family.

    So many Askal (short for asong-kalye meaning street dog) in the Philippines. I might have to adopt one, when I’m established there.

    • says

      In the little subdivision where I live are about 7 units/studios. Of the 20 or so dogs that wander in and out on a regular basis to check the porches and yard for food.. only 4 dogs are actually ‘owned’ by people who live here. The rest are just “out and about” not really belonging to anyone so, zero chance of them getting spayed. :(

  10. Jamie says

    My motto is like the Janet Jackson song: What have you done for me lately? It’s a two-way street. A double-edged sword. Relatives or no, there must be quid pro quo, if I am to part with my hard-earned money.

    • says

      I tried that with one woman, hired her as my maid. She never did show up and prior was already telling me that.. in addition to her pay she wanted transportation money and some money for lunch. So that went nowhere. But yes, the “what’s in it for me?” has to kick in sometimes. Back home my buddies and female friends, I get lunch.. they get movie tickets, I pay gas.. they pay parking, it’s mutual and reciprocal. But.. not much chance of that happening here from what I’ve seen thus far.

      • Jamie says

        Yes, I was speaking about my wife about this, and was told that when hit up for money, it would be rude of me to ask for something in return for giving away my money.

        Guess that is one of those cultural things I will need to learn how to handle in a more diplomatic fashion.

        • says

          Well.. even it it’s considered rude in the Philippines to ask for something in return for my money… it’s equally rude to ‘ask’ to ‘borrow’ money when there’s no intention to pay it back as well. So I guess it’s a draw, leaving the decision to… the person with the money.

          The way I see it, when someone ‘asks’ anything they are then to await an answer of ‘yes’, ‘no’, ‘maybe’ or ‘an alternative’. Nobody has the right to ‘ask’ for money and then determine the rules about repayment. The Lender always sets the terms and if the Borrower doesn’t like the terms.. he can go ask someone else. And that has nothing to do with culture, it just has to do with “who needs who”. I don’t NEED to be handing money away.. the other person is the one who needs me.

          It’s a sticky situation, especially when family is involved. Most ex-pats I’ve heard speak on the subject tend to say, “If you loan out money to family.. consider it gone forever.” I suppose what bugs me the most is people who have come to me asking for 1,000 Pesos and when I say, “Tell you what, I’ll loan you 300 Pesos against your next paycheck.” and they respond with, “No! It has to be 1,000 Pesos!!”. Well then, forget it. That’s just me after some hard and fast, hard-knock experience I’ve gotten my first 2 months here.

  11. Donna West says

    Great article Henry. It is “food for thought” for anyone living or considering living in the Philippines. I think the whole street dogs, street kids, sick babies, and every filipino with a financial crisis is a really big challenge to overcome for us Americans in the RP. Me , being a people person, animal lover and extremely compassionate indiviual, now realizes why I am still here in Missouri three years after I made a serious decision to spend the rest of my days living in the Philippines. Looking back now over those few years, i can see what an emotional and financial “train wreck” my life would have been had i gotten there way back when. My relocation to the Phils is happening in Gods time ….not in mine. i have known from the start that i have a purpose there….my path is chosen….i have just not seen it yet. i know in my heart i have been picked to make a tiny differnce in the lives of some of the people there. I dont know if it will be through a small non-profit organization i will be forming, or through volunteer work maybe even as small as reading books in English to the school kids. but I know my character and i know i am not the person i am for no reason. i cannot find happiness turning my back on every problem i see but i was not given the financial resources to solve hunger and poverty. but somewhere, somehow, when the time is right for me to be there in the RP, i will find that balance to fulfill my heart and know what i can do to nurture my heart and those of others. There are many problems of the heart too. and love really goes a lot further than coins when it all comes down to it. Thanks again Henry and those others who commented and have helped me further pave that path to my future in the philippines.

    • says

      Donna.. that is awesome that you’re willing to extend yourself and help in whatever way you feel you can handle. Personally, I’d suggest finding an existing charity already functioning in the area you decide to live in here and give them a helping hand. Much easier to make an impact than starting from scratch. I know and assisted a man who started an orphanage in Mexico and beginning from the ‘ground up’ on any endeavor can be really draining. But there are those who have been established here who could really use a helping hand (and heart) such as yours. I know there is a man named ‘Jim’ doing help for the needy on Mactan, but with some online research and Googling perhaps you’ll find the path you need to take. Best wishes in your travels! :)

  12. says

    Don’t forget “The more the merrier” translates to “The more the manier” and “Damned if you do, damned if you don’t” becomes “Damaged if you do, damaged if you don’t”. Americans and other native speakers often fail to realize the Philippines and the US are “Two countries separated by a common language” in Churchill’s immortal words.

    This can occasionally lead to big probl4ems in understanding, but “We’ll burn that bridge when we come to it” ;-)

    • says

      Yep.. and if not discussed openly can cause some weird misunderstandings. Fortunately my g/f and I are very open about everything. One time I was telling her that a wife should be the first and best source of counsel when making a decision since her future is attached to the decision as well. I then added, “This make a wife the greatest helpmate a man could have.” Well, my definition of ‘helpmate’ is an honorary one.. like a closest confidante. But in her mind, ‘helpmate’ sounded like ‘helper’.. as in, ‘the maid’. Took a while to clarify that difference.

      Another redefinition is the cultural difference between ‘girlfriend’ and ‘female friend’. I have lots of female-friends who are not girlfriends or even ex-girlfriends.. just friends who happen to be female. But in a Filipina’s vernacular there’s no such thing as a female-friend. Ha!.. this is gonna take awhile. :)

  13. Steven says

    I just got back from the PI a couple days ago. I had some interesting conversations and observations. 1. Like people everywhere, some Filipinos are ambitious and others are lazy. Everywhere you go, you’ll see people sitting about. They blame it on the economy. Yes, it is hard to get jobs in the traditional sense, but it is very simple and requires very little capital to start a business there. All one needs is a little skill, ambition, and pretty modest amount of money to start. A tricycle can be had for a couple hundred down, learn to cut hair, or even sell cold drinks in traffic.

    In conversations, one relative admitted to me that as long as they ate enough, many Filipinos were content. Another relative admitted to me that he quit his job without having another because he felt the pay was low and the hours long. That is probably true. He has chosen to live off the generousity of his sister living in the States. I explored the neighborhood he was living in. It was a one block gated community with modern style houses sandwiched together. Every one of them had clearly been purchased by an OFW and the people milling about were clearly doing nothing and living off their relatives.

    My wife has pressure to help out others in the family. We have been generous with them, yet at the same time, we must define the limits of what we will or will not contribute financially. We have helped out the parents. They have enough to live their simple lifestyle without any contributions from other children (about $150 a month). We have chosen to send a couple siblings to school. We have had little success with this so far. One has a Bachelors in Education with nothing to show for it but a nice graduation portrait. Another has an automechanics degree. He drives a Jeepney and almost drove his motorbike into the ground until I interveined. Another got a boyfriend and pregnant right away. Our final student is in nursing school. I sort of think they have learned to say “It’s for school” as a way to get money.

    • says

      Yep, that sounds about right. My g/f has helped quite a few nieces/nephews go through school. Only a few made anything of it, some of the girls got pregnant and that was the end of their ‘career’ before it even began.

      I met my maid because one day I was walking the street in search of skewers. She runs a bbq along the side of the road with a bbq she built from Re-Bar and a metal rain-gutter. Now she has a small hut to work from but was working from but before that just had a plastic table. Anyway, after getting to know her she was more than willing to work extra hours a few times a month cleaning my studio and doing my laundry. And she does all this with a minimal amount of capitol. “Where there’s a will, there’s a way.”

  14. Steven says

    PS, to the earlier poster who said “Nobody cares about you except your GF” I’d add that she wouldn’t be with you either if you only had $3 a day to spend. That’s why so many beautiful young women prefer middle age foreigners. It doesn’t make them or us bad people, just is what it is. The local guys would keep them barefoot and pregnant – literally.

    • says

      In the general sense, yes.. most all Filipinas here are looking to a retirement aged foreigner for security. In my case it’s kinda the reverse.

      I met my girlfriend while I was running my PC repair business in California. Only recently did I move here to the Philippines. But here I can’t really take up a ‘job’ so I work online to support myself along with a small amount of rent from a rental in California. It’s not much but enough for me as a single guy here. So.. basically, I don’t have money to support her family, take her island hopping, etc. Meanwhile, she owns three multi-story homes in the subdivision she helped develop. She has another four properties in Cebu and a farm she bought in Bogo so I could have a place to buy and raise piggies. (Other people raise them.) Bottom line.. she doesn’t need me at all. She’s got a brand-new 4x vehicle and just came back from Singapore with her girlfriends. I trust her because for the last two and a half years she’s never needed a dime from me. When I met her in California I thought she was a penniless waitress, helping out at her sister’s restaurant. It wasn’t until 6 months later and we were dating that I found out all she had. Before she left for the Philippines she handed me the keys to her 3 year old Mercedes and asked me to take care of it. Not the typical Filipina by any means.

      But I get what you’re saying, most women here are not like her. Most Filipinas don’t have money and will only entertain foreigners with steady income. As for me.. I guess I’m just a lucky guy. :)

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