Our laundry lady

Well, I am writing today about the lady we have here in the house. She’s really our laundry lady. She’s been with us for 4 months now. She was brought here by our previous laundry lady who also we were happy to have but had to go home to her province because of family problems. The new one, her name is Pat. She’s really a nice lady. When she came for the job, our old laundry lady told me that Pat was beaten up  a few days before by her hubby and that she will report in a few days because she still had the black and blue mark from the beating. My first reaction when they told me did she report the husband to the police? Pat and the old laundry lady told me that they did and the guy was put to jail for a few days. I was asking Pat what’s the job of her dear husband at that time when she first came to the house? She told me none (standby for Filipino term). The old laundry lady said that I think the reason for his being violent was because he was aggravated that he had no job. Well my answer to them was for him to find a job then. He has family to support, the time that he is pouting if he look for a job I bet you money he can find even to be janitor he has to do it. He had 2 kids to support and his wife. I told Pat, before I will hire you to tell your husband not to come to the house.

Pat and her hubby have 2 kids together. Ages 7 and 4 years old. She had 1 kid out of wedlock before she married the guy now. The kid is 14 years old her name is Jane, who is living with the grandparents. So Pat didn’t really spend time with Jane when she was young because Pat was working somewhere in Manila after the birth.  A few years after working in Manila she came back here and started to bond with Jane but it’s too late Jane didn’t know Pat that much and she bonded well with her grandparents and aunts.

So Pat just let the grandparents raise Jane continuously. Once in a while Pat would have Jane at her house since Jane had another siblings now. Sometimes Pat would discipline Jane because she would not study hard in school and go places with her boyfriend even its school day. Her grades are really low some subjects she failed. So Pat tried to scold Jane about her school grades, I guess the grandparents would get mad and even sometimes slap Pat because they think she just had no right for Jane.

Instead of disciplining Jane they will discipline Pat. Like sometimes the grandparents would complain to Pat that Jane would not listen to them, then Pat would tell them that because you guys didn’t discipline her and she thinks she can do anything. They will get mad at Pat, they even let Jane hear sometimes that they argue against Pat.

Sometimes Pat would cry when she’s telling me about the situations at her house. I told her that she should discipline Jane because its her daughter and her parents will not be here forever to be with Jane. That she should discipline Jane before its too late. I told her that its not the grandparents that Jane will blame later if her life is in a mess, that it would be Pat being she’s the mom.

She agreed with me, but typical daughter just a bit scared to say something to the parents. Scared of being the disobedient daughter.  I told her you already the disobedient daughter, you didn’t follow your parents when they asked you not to be pregnant at the young age. Sometimes its hard to advice someone when you know they are not equipped with good knowledge instead with fear.

She brought Jane at the house one day for me to talked to Jane. I was nice to Jane and just asked her what does she wants in life. Jane answered me that she wants to have good life and better life than her mom. I told her if you want to be different and be successful you have to work hard for it. Its not just a hand off. You have to sweat it to earn it. I told her how could you earn if you just going around with your boyfriend? I told her you will end up pregnant at a young age and really you will end up being the laundry lady or the maid someday if your not being careful.

I am really hoping that she will listen. I said that its okay to have boyfriend and be inspired but you also have to do a lot of sacrifices. Work hard on your studies and try to help out your family during weekends. Me and my nieces told Jane the life we had in the farm before, its not an easy life. That really drives us to be successful. I hope she listened to us. I asked Jane if she like and wants the job of her mom being laundry lady? She told me NO. I said I’m sure your mom didn’t want to be the laundry lady but because she didn’t finish school and had the baby at an early age that’s why she end up to be maid or laundry lady.

Like now Jane sometimes comes to our house to help her mom and also for her to eat good food, they’re eating but not totally good food. Jane, she’s really thin for her age. She’s way smaller and thinner than our daughter Jean Jean, who is several years younger than Jane.

Luckily the husband found a job now. He is working with some contractor in fixing lights in the city. Not sure what lights though. I just didn’t asked that much about that anymore. Honestly I want that Pat will have pretty descent life. But she has to work hard though. I hope the husband will continue to help Pat on that quest.

Cheers!

Dear Feyma: I need a house!

Time for another edition of Dear Feyma, where I try to help readers with Philippine related issues that they may be facing.

If you have a question you wish to have featured here on my “Dear Feyma” column, please contact me through the “Contact Us” link at the top of each page here on the Live in the Philippines Web Magazine.

This week, I have heard from a number of people looking to buy or rent property here in the Philippines.  I have combined several of their e-mails into a single e-mail that will answer all of them at once.  I hope they don’t mind, it just makes it easier this way, and they will each get their answer.  Also, it makes it where they will remain more anonymous.

Dear Feyma,

“I am interested in buying a house and lot in Davao. A member of my wife’s family bought a house and lot up North. I like to be in Davao since I’ve heard a lot of good things about the place. I want a place in the city proper. Is there a 4-5 bedroom house in Davao City? Is it safe there?”

I received an email regarding buying a house here in Davao City. A guy wrote to me asking for it. Of course I told him that I saw some places here in Davao that’s for sale with the specification that he is asking for. In around Davao and in the gated area too. I told him that Davao really is the safest city right now in the Philippines. Thanks to the Mayor of Davao City, Mayor Duterte.

Somehow he has to convince his wife first before moving back here to the Philippines. One of his wife’s family members bought a house somewhere in the Northern part of the Philippines. The house that was bought there had the specifications that he wanted. So he really is itching to purchase here if only his wife will say the big yes. I think she will agree to him in buying  a house if its near to the family member that just purchased.

He had problem buying up North because the house that just bought by the family member was hit by the typhoon “Ondoy”. The house got damaged. And this guy doesn’t want to be there in Luzon after hearing from the family that the got hit and upon seeing on TV of what happened. But somehow the wife still wants to be there to be near to her family. I can’t blame her for wanting to be near the family. I am hoping that the couple can resolved their issues with the place they will retire later. I can see the point of the husband, but I can’t blame the wife for her decision too. Personally for this couple I think they should just put the moving to the Philippines on hold for a long awhile until both of them can agree a 100% where they want to stay here in the Philippines.

My advice to the couple to really decide tightly so that at the end no one will have the resentment. Moving here is not easy, the Filipina had to readjust again here with the culture and the weather.  The husband he has to adjust being here and seeing the poor people all over the place which is not easy at first. It took us like 3-4 years to really adjust being here. Culturally for me I had to relearned being in the States for 10 years, with Bob he had to rom me, the people and from his Bisaya teacher Bebe Metillo, thank God for her.  She taught me a lot too.

Good luck to you and your wife. You can email me anytime!

All Saints and All Souls Day!

I just got back from GenSan to visit my family. I went there to celebrate All Saints Day and All Souls Day. Its a big holiday here in the Philippines in honor or pay respects for our love ones who passed away. As what I’ve known since childhood that November 1 is All Saints Day in honor for the kids that died. November 2nd All Souls Day in honor for the adult love ones that died. There was no school(semester break) here for the kids for the said event. Most families will go home to the hometown where their love ones were buried. Like me, I have to go to GenSan for it.

I think really nowadays it doesn’t really matter which day you celebrate. A lot of people now celebrate the day that really is best for them. Like us, we have children and adults that passed. We went to the cemetery on the 2nd of November since one of my sibling has something going on in there church on the 1st. Some of my family members went to the graves on the first of November and didn’t come back to visit the next day with us.

I went to GenSan early morning of Monday. I went to the farm first and went to the graves of my grandparents and uncle on my Mom’s side of the family. I didn’t stay there that long because me and my siblings had to go to my parents’ and sister’s grave. We went there at 1pm and stayed for like 5 hours there. We brought some drinks and snacks. My nieces and nephews were there already waiting for us. It was really nice just chatting there and remembering my parents. It was fun seeing some people really having a big party there.

Restaurants like Jollibee, Pizza Hut, Greenwich, Dunkin Donuts and some other good restaurants even put up a temporary place there. It must be a hit for them, they would not come back year after year if its not making good money for them.

There’s even a layman (from Catholic church) who will pray (lead prayer) with the family there. I am not sure how much they are charging though. I didn’t ask my sister about it. I saw a lot of families asking those layman to pray with them in the graves. The cemetery place really caters now to the need of the people there.  I saw lots of police securing the place inside the cemetery and outside which is nice. Also there were ambulances and red cross volunteers there. That’s why people stayed there overnight. I think the maintenance people were not too enthusiastic about cleaning the big mess that was left behind by the people. I saw people just throw away their garbage on the ground. Don’t even look for the garbage can to properly disposed of it. Oh well, pretty normal here.

Some mausoleum owners there even built room for sleeping. They really had big parties there. Those mausoleums are really costly. Some are even like over a million pesos just for the land. It was just fun for us watching the people there having party. Some even brought hammocks and slept on that. Really, in all honesty its really good that people of all ages showed respect to the love ones who passed on ahead of us.

It doesn’t really matter if your rich or poor for as long as you honor your love one on that day, that’s good enough already.  My siblings just wished I brought my kids. It would be something for them to experience for the first time. Hopefully next year they can go and see what really the events for.

Dear Feyma: OFW Disappearance

Just a few days ago I got an interesting email from a person in the Middle East. He had a Filipina employee (Domestic Helper) at his house. Somehow early this month she went missing. He was trying to reach out to the family of the employee here in the Philippines and he couldn’t get any response. He also tried to call and emailed the Philippine Embassy in his country and got no reply too. He also emailed the agency where the lady was associated with but got no acknowledgment from them too.

Here’s the email that I got. I just edited the name of the girl because I just don’t want to invade her privacy. Plus, I don’t really know the real reasons why she left her employer.

“Dear Feyma,wouid you please help me to contact any of my employee’s reletives,since she is missing. she worked as a house
domastic maid at my house in the Middle East. i tried to reach her family in philippines but in somehow i got you. for some reason i think you can help.”

So he was trying to find any relative or agency on the web and somehow he came across my name. So, he then emailed me and asked me if I could help him. He even gave me the passport number of the lady for me to search I guess. he didn’t really give me much information about the lady other than her name and her passport number. I then emailed him back of some array of questions.

Honestly some questions he might not be comfortable with. I just don’t know if the lady was treated well at his household. I’ve heard too many horror stories of the OFW in the Middle East. I told him that  I really am sorry for my blunt questions. I don’t know if the lady really went away because she was abused or was she hurt by somebody in the household and was killed? I don’t really know. I was left with too many questions in my mind though. I really hope that the lady is okay. If she ever was abused to report to her agency or in the Philippine Embassy in the Middle East. To be honest I am really bothered by this email.

I know a lot of the ladies that worked as an OFW, some really suffered from the hands of their employers. It is painful to hear sometimes on the news on TV about it. What can we do? The problem is the ladies really just want to gamble their lives to work abroad because they can’t find job here in the Philippines. I really am feeling sorry for the kids they left behind here. I know it must be hard for them, but they will sacrifice to earn money so the  kids can go to a better school and have a better life. I just hope that the kids and the family that was left behind can see the sacrifice of the loved one that worked so hard abroad.

Anyway, I hope that the lady that was missing is okay. I haven’t heard back from the person that emailed me. I will follow up on this and give you guys the update. If any of you had the similar situation when working abroad please share it to the group here.

Thank you so much guys!

The girl of my dreams

Some years back I met a girl.  She was special, and has never left my heart in those many years.  Even today, I cannot get her out of my mind.  She changed my life, and certainly changed it for the better.  Of course, I’m talking about my wife of 19+ years.

Today’s a special day here in the Martin household, because it’s Feyma’s birthday.  I’m not going to reveal her age, although I think it’s already known here on LiP, but, you know… it’s a respect thing – you just don’t reveal a woman’s age.  So, I won’t.

I met Feyma in Cebu City, in 1990.  She was studying at the time, nearly finished with college.  We had been corresponding with each other (snail mail… the Internet was not really available to the public yet at that time) for only about 6 months when I came to the Philippines to meet her.  I was here for only 3 weeks, and we got married while I was here.  Many people told me I was crazy, an idiot, or worse for marrying a girl that I had only just met.  Well, after 19 years, I can only say that history proved my actions right.  I was lucky, yes.  I continue to be lucky to this day.

We’ve had our ups and downs in the past 19+ years.  What couple has not experienced ups and downs in the course of a marriage?  None.  But, the ups are way bigger than the downs ever were.  Feyma does everything she can to make me feel special.  I do things for her too, but to be honest, I am far more often on the receiving end than the giving end of that.  I feel guilty sometimes for that too.  But, I hope Feyma knows how much I love her.  I always will too.  Sometimes, if we are having an argument over something, even as tough as I might try to make myself sound to her, inside I think to myself – “what would I do if I didn’t have her?”

So, today, I will be doing what I can to make Feyma’s day special.  She deserves it, after all.  I’ll take her out for lunch, just the two of us.  My only problem is that whenever I take her out for a meal, I never can get her to choose the place!  She always says, “you decide,” even though I want it to be special for her.  But, that is her nature, I suppose.

Feyma is not the same girl I married those many years ago, though.  She is very complex.  Back in 1990, she was that typical quiet, shy Filipina that we have all met here.  Then she spent 10 years in the States, and that changed her a lot.  She is much more assertive now, much more confident.  She is now Feyma 2.0.  I’m OK with that, though.  Yes, she has changed a lot, but I love Feyma 2.0 as much as I loved Feyma 1.0.

As I think about it, maybe I’m wrong.  She is probably Feyma 3.0, I guess.  Feyma 1.0 was that Feyma that I met in Cebu in 1990, and fell in love with.  Feyma 2.0 was the woman that she grew into after living in the States.  The new Feyma 3.0 is the Feyma that came to be after returning to the Philippines.  It took her a long time to adjust back to life in the Philippines.  She didn’t revert back to Feyma 1.0 either.  How could she?  No, she took the best from Feyma 1.0 and Feyma 2.0 and combined it into the best version yet, Feyma 3.0 that we all know today.

A lot of foreign men will say that you should never bring your lady to live in the West, it will change her, take away the special part of her culture, or whatever.  I find that if Feyma had not lived in the States for 10 years, she would not have the understanding of me that she possesses.  Now, Feyma is not a Filipina, nor an American, she is a combination of the two.  I suppose I have also become a combination of the two after nearly a decade of living in the Philippines.  I suppose that we have somewhat grown together through our life in my culture and hers.  I like that.  It works well for both of us.

Happy Birthday to my sweetheart.  I hope we can celebrate many more birthdays together!  I love you very much.

Dear Feyma…

“Then she told me of her problem with a person she cared about, her foreigner friend. It’s not her boyfriend because she’s a happily married. She just knew this friend for quite sometime now.” – Feyma

“Sounds like a Dear Abby problem to me”. —- From a guy that commented.

Well somebody’s comment about the “Dear Abby” thing that got me thinking. Hmm. I am kind of like a Dear Abby in the net for the Pinays. I am not trying to be conceited here. I not even one tenth of the real Dear Abby. But I tried to be to the people that email me and tell me their problems in life. I am not trained and have degrees from it. But just trying to help the Pinay and the foreigner that married and intending to marry a Filipina.

I receive a lot of emails from ladies (pinays) abroad about the problems they have with their spouses or with the in-laws. They will ask my advice and what can I say about their situations. They told me the reason why they are asking me since I have been married to Bob for nearly 20 years then I have some experience with life. I got some interesting emails down to I am feeling sorry for them. I was not a Dear Abby reader while in the States before. I think I just read her column once. I just heard it with some friends before.

I will give you some sample of the emails I got. I got an email from somebody asking me what to do with the guy that she is dating with. She really like the guy, she said she knows the guy likes her too,  but she said they really had big problems with communications I guess being in 2 different cultures. She’s really worried because she felt that the guy has been avoiding her. Well, I tried to give my advice and of course she knows the guy better than I do.

Some other that the lady really wanted to retire here but the husband would not. She wants me help her convince the husband to retire here. She even gave me the email address of the husband. Wow, what can I do to help on that. It’s kind of awkward though, how would I convince somebody I don’t even know.

Some other, a guy asked me what would I think of his girlfriend. He will gave me a small background of the girl and he will rely on my answer if he should marry the girl or not. How could I answer stuff like that I never even meet the girl or know the girl. My goodness.

Or some guy from there (from the West) will send pictures and he wants us to find the lady in the picture. And you know what, the picture that was sent to them by the lady they are corresponding with was the actress or the sexy starlet here in the Philippines.

Some ladies would email me the dilemma they have with their mother-in-laws. They are having trouble handling the attitudes of the in-laws. I have some with the lady has problem dealing with the step children. Some step children were older than they are and having trouble with the money that the husband will leave behind. To think the husband’s not even dead yet. But they’re fighting over the inheritance already.

So that’s just some of the private emails I got from people. It’s hard to tell those people what to do especially I don’t even know them. It never crossed my mind about the Dear Abby thing until the guy comment to me about it. Really I didn’t even thought about it until now of how much emails I got. It’s really coming from the ladies and the guys. Really I could go on and on about it. Some of them that got me thinking for days because of the severity of the problems.

Some are friends (foreigners) for a long time and asked my honest opinion on the woman they are dating with. They are having problems dealing with the girl. The guy want’s me to be a friend to the girl and maybe just tell the girl a little bit of my life living in the USA. Most of the ladies will tell the guy they don’t like me because I am too old to be their friend. A lot of times I just laugh it off and just say to Bob look who’s talking they don’t like me because I am too old for them but they are dating older guys. Hmm, strange.

I am not trying to give out the identity of the people here. A lot of times I get same or similar problems to a lot of people. I am generalizing the emails that I got. To be honest with you I just want that other people can pick out some lessons from a lot of you guys that comment here on LIP. I thank you again for giving people good advices here.

Mabuhay!

A friend’s problem

A week or so ago I bumped into a friend. We were chatting for a few minutes. Then she told me of her problem with a person she cared about, her foreigner friend. It’s not her boyfriend because she’s a happily married. She just knew this friend for quite sometime now. She was telling me that her friend was living here in the Philippines for a while now, he is from somewhere in Europe if I remember. He is a single guy. The foreigner was intending to live here for good.

The problem of my friend now is that the foreigner is dating a lady that has 4 kids. She didn’t have problem with the 4 kids, but she had problem with the lady being still married to the father of the kids. The lady is trying to get separated, but is not totally yet. The lady also has a boyfriend on the side, plus the husband, and all the while dating the foreigner too!  The foreigner knows about this too, but apparently is not concerned about it.

She wants me to meet the guy and talk to him. I told her that the foreigner guy is a big boy and can handle himself. And, I told her I don’t have business to be telling him what to do. I told her to let the guy find out for himself. The fear of my friend if the husband and/or the boyfriend might hurt the foreigner and they will get all his money. I told her let him learn his lesson,if he will not listen to common sense. If that’s what happens, let it be. I would not want something bad happening to the foreigner, but its not my business or my friend’s business to tell him any more. I told her that I had a friend before that I also warned him that the law here is so different than in the West, and that the politicians here would really protect their very own people.

Like what I told her, the foreigner will learn when the husband or the boyfriend will do something to him. Here, if the husband or the boyfriend caught the foreigner making out with the lady they can do anything to him. I’ve seen a lot on the news on TV that the lady and the lover get killed by the husband because he find out and caught the wife with somebody in bed. Here if the husband  or boyfriend had somebody on the side(mistress) its more acceptable in the society. Like its just the norm here for that. But if the woman caught having an affair, its gonna be a big problem here. I felt that that the husband has the right to do anything. It’s really not fair though. I forgot theirs a lady politician trying to pass a law trying to get a fair right for the woman here in the Philippines. I am against having an affair, why not separate first before going to get involved with somebody.

Honestly I am really debating to write this because I am not so sure if some people will like it. But I also want some people to learn a lesson from somebody. I heard of people saying that it is not an easy place to live here because lots of beautiful ladies to look at and its so tempting for them. Well, its okay if the lady that you are dating is not committed yet to somebody. SO JUST BE VERY CAREFUL though if living here.

I don’t really know what to say more to my friend. I don’t really want to get involved with them. I am just crossing my fingers and hoping for the foreigner to learned his lesson and wake up to the reality. Any advice from you guys really are helpful. I will relay to my friend. Thank you to all!

Cheers!

How to make Biko(sticky rice)

I will share with you the recipe on how to make the sticky rice. Its really not that hard. Just a few ingredients with it. Really you can buy lots of sticky rice here in some of the snack shops, but I want to make it the way my mom used to make and use the coconut that just came from our farm.

I say coconut that came from our farm, what I mean for that is I will have the coconut milk from the coconut that grew in our farm. My sisters really know how to choose the right coconut for that. They really know if the coconut is way old already which means had less coconut milk or way too young. I used to know all those tricks before. My sister got the talent of my mom on making all kinds of good snacks. In short I am not good on that.

Honestly my nieces and nephews that grew up in the farm know the difference between the sticky rice that’s made by my mom and the one that just bought in the store.

Anyway here’s the recipe:

Ingredients:

• Sticky rice 2 kilos
• Sugar ( 1/2 kilo brown sugar & 1/2 kilo muscavado sugar-Kinugay) Splenda is good too.
• 8 to 10 cups coconut milk
• 1 glass of  water
• dash of salt
• Banana leaves( you can find it in any Asian store)

Procedure:

First cook the sticky rice just the way you cook the regular rice. When its cooked then let it cool. On a big pan put the coconut milk and let it be simmer in a medium heat keep on stirring. It could take up to almost an hour. When its simmering you can see small pieces floating that small pieces(we call it lunok here in Bisaya). You can also see that it’s getting oily since its came from coconut.  Take out the lunok and put it in a bowl and you can eat it. Don’t eat too much though its not good for your tummy.  Then add the sugar half a kilo first in the pan and keep stirring, and add  a glass of water and a dash of salt, continue stirring until the sugar mix well and  dissolved.  Keep tasting until your desired sweetness. When you see that the sugar mixed well keep stirring for maybe like 10 minutes. Then take out like a cup from the batter you just made and put in a bowl and put aside. Then time to add the sticky rice slowly to the batter, a little bit at a time and continue mixing until you reach your desired consistency. Some people like me to have our sticky rice a bit drier, some people in my family likes it to be a bit more saucy.  You can add the sauce that ou save in a bowl if needed. Then put the banana leaves on top and put the lid and let it cool a bit before eating.

A lot of us in our family likes our biko eaten the next day. It’s good with coffee and sikwati/tsokolate(cacao). Some people put some nuts or some shredded young coconut or more muscavado sugar on top of the biko. Really its up to you. You can also put food coloring on it too. I saw some colored  biko like yellow, purple, green and many others.

Hope you guys will try it. Have fun cooking.

Cheers!

My Mom’s 1st year death anniversary

Just as I was typing this column the prayer for my Mom’s death anniversary has been started. See here in the Philippines in the Catholic faith if someone dies there is a 9 days prayer going when the person died. Same thing going on during the first year anniversary of the death. There is a 9 days prayer before the said date. Just like my mom, she died October 5th, so the 9 days prayer started September 27th. We did this since my mom was Catholic all her life. We honor her faith.

On the said 9 days prayer, my sister hired her neighbor to lead the prayer. There is a certain prayer that you have to do for the death. It’s like a Rosary in the Catholic that someone will lead. It will take like almost an hour for the prayer. It’s kind of nice because its really a prayer dedicated for my mom. While the prayer is going on a few sticks of candles should be lit up. Some family they had something lit in the altar until the 9 days prayer is over. Not sure if my sister did that though. After the prayer you have to feed the people that attended the prayer. It could be like a few to a lot of people. The last prayer would be done at the grave of my mom. We will be there on the 5th of October. My siblings wants us to stay there on the graves the whole day I think. Honestly I will follow them on this thing because the last time I attended an events like this during my sister’s death. That was about 30 years ago. With my Dad I was in the States, but went home for the 1st year anniversary but didn’t pay much attention because it was hard for me to accept his death. Plus I didn’t go to the grave of my dad at that time with my siblings because the security in our place in the farm at that time was unstable. So I didn’t really think of it. So with my moms death anniversary I will be off to GenSan for the event.

With the last days of prayer most families here in the Philippines will butcher animals for that. For us my siblings bought a whole pig and it will be butchered the early morning on the 5th of October. We will also have some chickens for the other family members that will not eat pork. Some of my family in the Farm might be coming to celebrate with us. Really it could be a lot of people or just us family.  My mom died in the farm, but we will celebrate the anniversary in GenSan since my mom lives in my sister’s house for a long time and also my mom and my dad and my sister are now buried in GenSan anyway.

Some families here they will cook the food in the house and bring it to the grave and eat there. I don’t know if that’s what my siblings are planning to do. I think that’s the trend nowadays. I hope not like that. My parents never brought us to the grave of my sister and my grandparents before and eat there. I hope we will just do the prayers there at my mom’s grave and go home and eat at the house. Really whatever my siblings do I will just follow them and will see what happens. I am not going to tell them what to do. Me and my siblings are one for my moms memory. I thank them for being there during her sickness.

Mama may you rest in peace. Bob and I love you very much!

” For all our readers here who has families that was hit by Ondoy our prayers are with you.“

What is a C.A.T.?

For high school in the Philippines almost all students will go through the CAT before graduating. You would probably wonder what is a CAT? CAT means Citizen Army Training. Just like the military. We have to go through the drill and formation. For most of the schools here private or public it’s really mandatory for a senior student to have the CAT. In my school, being just girls exclusively and not many senior students, that’s why the junior students were called to filled in. With the CAT it also had a band that played while we were in the formation.

Our CAT uniform was really like the military, and we had a rifle too. Were using the fatigue and the shoes has to be really shiny and the belt. Our Colonel really checked our belt if she could see herself, just like a mirror. If she could not, then it’s not shiny enough. You got punished for that. Also, there was a certain way to fold the handkerchief and the way to put the hat. If you had long hair you had to tie that and tuck it in inside the hat or use some hair clip that would hide your hair so that it wouldn’t go in your face . The clip to be used had to be black. They really were strict on that.  Can you imagine the drill in the hot sunny day over 100 degrees. We got sunburned a lot. If there was a contest against all schoosl private and public school (GenSan and the neighboring provinces) we would really have the drill (practice) for a whole day with Saturday and Sunday whole day too. Sometimes one of the students would pass out being under the hot sun for hours. Try not to pass out because the punishment will await you. To be honest I passed out one time.  I think if I remember before going to school that day I didn’t eat breakfast. Man I really suffered later. I just fainted while in the drill. When I felt  better later I had to give 20 push ups. I’m not happy to give but had to do it. Luckily it doesn’t happen a lot. I think being an all girls school we wanted to prove to everyone that we can do it. To be honest we really got good marks during the contest. Scores for the contests were really for the formation, rifle assembly, the band and discipline of course for the Cadettes.

One thing too on the training, don’t be late on the drill because the punishment would really be more than the push ups. Honestly on the military thing like the CAT students were not late. If our Captain leader said be here at 15 hundred we would be there 10 minutes before the time. But if our class president say we have a meeting at the classroom by 9am most of the classmates would be late like 10 to 15 minutes. I think because no punishment. With the military right in front of everybody you get punished.

In all honesty I’m glad to have the training. Just didn’t want it to be 2 years. It’s harder if your the lower year because as if your the slave. You will serve the higher years. It’s like payback time. Since they were punished a lot in the junior years they will pay it back when time for them in the senior years. I guess I had resentment at that time. Looking back now its kind of funny and fun. It was fun though like all of us be punished and all of us do the push up or sitting in the air. Were so serious in the drill but when we get back to our classroom we would be bursting in laughter, but we would not let the officer know that we are laughing on that. We might get more punishment next time we have the drill.

One time during our junior years one of my classmates, she’s really the clown in the class. Right before our CAT time, my clown classmate made a fashion show in our classroom using her rifle. She’s really making all kind of tricks with her rifle. Of course we were all laughing at it. We didn’t realize that one of the officer passed by the corridor in the classroom and saw what my classmate did. The officer didn’t like it. We all got the punishment. She told us to give 50 push ups. She immediately said that it’s a fault for all. We didn’t say anything, we just followed because if you said something they would give us more punishment.

I will share next time our training its not an easy one especially if your aspiring to be in a higher officer and my best friend was the lucky one to be chosen as the Colonel.

Mabuhay!

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