Feyma Martin

Today I got a text from our helper that she is quiting.

She went home a few days ago to the province to visit her Dad and attend the wedding of her uncle.

Our helper was complaining how did her uncle afford to be getting married (even special wedding) that him and his wife has no job. The wife-to-be is like 5 months pregnant now. A few months back that same uncle was asking some money from our helper for her to help the wedding expenses. I told her at that time that would you really want to send the money to your uncle even your dad is needing the money for his check up? Her dad is kind of sickly with old age and overwork in the farm. She told me that she wants the money to be given to her dad. I had a feeling that the family is forcing them to help pay with the wedding. My nieces and I even told her to just send the money to her dad because the fare to go to the farm can already pay half sack of rice. Which is a big deal to her family.

She has been working with us for over 2 years now. When I hired her I told her that I don’t want for her to just stay with me for a few months and I will train her how to do some work and later on quit. Well, at least she stayed for 2 years.

When she first came to our house she really looked pretty bad, her teeth had lots of problems, her skin was so dry because of working in the farm. Really we felt sorry for her. The next day when she came I immediately brought her to the dentist for her teeth to get fixed first. The dentist did a good job and our helper was really happy with the result. At least for staying here for 2 years she really learned a lot and she looks better. Even her neighbors in the province would always comment to her that she must have been treated good with her employer because she looks great now.

She told my sister that it is hard for her to quit because we really treated her good, but just that she wants to be with her family all the time. My sister said that how could she afford the medicine and the food if she’s not working? Our helper said that it’s okay for her to work at the next town and have a smaller paycheck as long as shes near to her dad.

I think she is now helping her aunt to do laundry (labandera). Some of her cousins want her to be the nanny of their babies and kids. They even got mad at her for working with us since we are not her family. I think she’s just so tired of their whining and will just work with them to get it over with. She really despises her extended family because when her and her dad were in need of her family to help them because one of her siblings got ill, the family just turned them away and told them they had no money.

But when the uncle was getting ready to get married the family really told the dad of our helper that they have to give this amount of money and they have to give it right away. And now that our helper was working and earning a little bit to support her dad and siblings the family wants a portion of her paycheck too. Sometimes I told her to get her priority straight. To focus on her dad and her siblings instead of her relatives.

I really hope she is happy on the next job that she ventures. I hope that she will not get married soon, shes too young to have a kid too.

I have a friend that I knew in the States since the beginning the time that I lived there. She’s a little bit older than me. She was also a little ahead of me maybe like half a year to be in the States. Her husband is quite older than her, he has kids from his previous marriage.

At first, my friend was accepted by one of the husband’s kids. The husband, ever since my friend went to the States, he is kind of sickly already. My friend was the one tending to their farm. They had like over 80 acres of land. With that land she needs to have people to help her. So lots of time she hire people to help her. Her husband sometimes would even get jealous of my friend and some of the workers. He would say that she had an affair with the worker or something.

The son of the husband just lived like a few meters away from them, my friend would ask him if he could help her in the farm. He will just say that he would but never showed up. But he would ask his dad for money after the harvest. The thing is the dad would always give, my friend will not say a word because it’s his son.

Lately, my friend can’t take it anymore she told her husband to stop giving since they don’t have much money and he didn’t earn to have that money anyway. Well, the son is now starting to accuse my friend of poisoning his dad. The husband now is getting very ill, and he was just hospitalized and my friend was investigated while he was in the hospital. The doctors can’t find any trace of poison, so now the son was telling the dad that my friend has somebody with her. I believe my friend when she said she didn’t have anybody. She told me that she just don’t have any desire to have somebody while shes married. The son was just trying to get my friend in trouble so that they (him and his siblings) will get the money from the land after their dad will pass away. Very sad, but my friend is depressed right now over this accusation. A few days ago when I talked to her she told me that she really wants to leave the husband now. She’s just tired of his attitude because he is now believing the son. A lot of her friends now, I’m one of them were not calling her that much because the husband would be screaming at her while shes on the phone talking. Honestly it’s annoying when I talked to her and the hubby would asked whose that your talking? Is it one of your boyfriends? I really hope that the husband will remember how my friend took good care of him when all his kids and family abandoned him. She’s the only person who stood at his side and helped him in the farm.

To you friend please stay safe and don’t trust the son. Don’t forget to ask help from our friends there. I’ll call you again soon. Take care always! God will be there for you!

Last week a new friend from Manila visited us here in Davao. Bob and I decided to invite them over to our house for dinner. One thing that I prepared was onion rings. They liked it a lot. He asked for the recipe, I promised him I will post it here for him. So Mr. Dave Starr here’s the onion ring recipe.

Ingredients:

1. 2 large yellow onion, peeled, ringed sliced into 1/2 inch thick separated
2. 1 1/4 cups all purpose flour
3. 1/4 cup cornmeal or corn grits ( binlod in bisaya)
4. 2 cups buttermilk, or 1 cup plain yogurt mixed with 1 cup milk
5. 2-3 cups canola oil
6. salt and freshly ground pepper

* Locally made buttermilk: 2 cups of milk mix with 4 tbsp of vinegar. Soak for at least 30 minutes before using. *

Procedure:

1. Combine the buttermilk ( or the yogurt and milk) with the 1 1/2 teaspoons of salt and 1 teaspoon of freshly ground pepper in a large bowl. Add the onions to the buttermilk mixture and coat thoroughly. Let set for at least 15 minutes.
2. In a separate bowl combine the flour and cornmeal or corn grits, 1 tsp. of salt and 1/2 tsp. of pepper. Set aside.
3. Add the oil to the fry daddy or your pan (good for deep frying). You can use more oil if necessary. Heat the oil to 350 degrees Fahrenheit or if you don’t have thermometer in the house just test it with by moistening a little bit of the flour and dropping it in the pan. If it sizzles then its ready. If it burns, take the pan off from the heat and let the oil cool down a bit.
4. Working in batches, lift some onions rings out of the buttermilk and coat them in the flour mixture. Fry until golden brown, do not crowd them in the pan. Place finished onion rings on a cookie sheet lined with paper towel to absorb the excess oil. You can keep the cook onion rings in the oven to keep it warm in 200 degrees Fahrenheit while frying the rest. Between batches, if your frying more and end up adding more oil. Let the temperature get back to 350 degrees before starting the next batch.
5. Serve hot.

I hope that you will try this recipe and let me know what you think. Onion rings are also good for pulutan with San Miguel Beer. Did I make you guys hungry for onion rings or the San Mig?

Have fun eating!

Last week was a search for Bb. Pilipinas (Miss Philippines) here. On this beauty pageant they will get like 3 ladies that will represent the Philippines on all the pageant abroad like Miss Universe, Miss International and Miss World. Its a bit controversial this time.

Here is a look at the eventual contest winner and how she answered the question put to her, see what you think!

Well, during the pageant and it was time for the question and answer portion for the top 10 contestants and one contestant was Janina San Miguel, and asked by this question by the judge: “What role did your family play with you as candidate for Bb. Pilipinas?” Wow, I was shocked that she didn’t really give a good answer. Or was she just too nervous? She said before the question that she didn’t feel any pressure, but when answering the question it shows that she’s really nervous, her answer was just all over the place and it didn’t make any sense. I know it’s hard to be on live TV and millions of people watching, but its really a concern now for her when it is time of the Miss World Pageant and its on live TV all over the world. How can she handle the pressure then? Like what she said she’s 17 years old and its her first time, maybe she’s not yet ready right now. Maybe in a year or 2. It really shocked me that she was chosen to win.

Maybe she still can make it. One of the contestant before that got the first runner up in Miss World ‘93 (Miss Ruffa Gutierrez) said that Miss Janina San Miguel still had 7 more months to practice and build confidence. She adds that the pageant is not just for beauty but for brain too. I really hope she will make it.

What do you guys think?

Tonight Bob, myself, our nieces and Jean Jean were visiting a family member who was admitted to a hospital near our house. We didn’t know that she was there until late this afternoon. Actually this person is the wife of my cousin. This cousin is kind of close to Bob because he was the person that stood in at the Church for our wedding as the “Dad” of Bob. I guess she’s been in the hospital for nearly a week now. She was hospitalized because she just had her surgery today for breast cancer. I was even surprised that she had surgery because she already told the family when she was diagnosed 2 years ago that she would never want to undergo a surgery. I’m glad she changed her mind though so that at least she can be saved if ever.

When we got to the hospital my cousin wasn’t there. He went home to the farm to tend to their businesses. He will be back tomorrow. Hopefully we can go back tomorrow to see him. Anyway, his wife when I first met her she must have weigh like 150lbs, when I saw her tonight she might just weigh like 90lbs or less. She didn’t look good too. She told us tonight that she felt like vomiting, it could be from medication. Really at the time that she was diagnose 2 years ago if she would have agreed to the doctor to remove the lump in her breast she could have been better now. At that time when my cousin or some member of the family would mention to her to go to the doctor for check up she will get upset and tell everybody to not be telling her because she knows what to do and its her body. So when I saw her during the funeral of my Aunt(her mother-in-law) I never mention anything about her sickness. I could see at that time that shes losing weight and she looks different. I think really her grandkids are the one that makes her want to live now. I hope its not too late for her. Her daughter told me tonight that the doctor said that there is still more cancer inside. They are not sure if she wants to go through more surgery again, though.

I really hope that she can still be here for awhile to enjoy watching her grandkids and adopted kid grow up. I hope she won’t give up easy. I hope she’s as strong as before when her and my cousin has problem in their marriage life she didn’t give up, hopefully she can do the same now. She’s just in her late 40’s. She’s too young still to go away.

Just pray for her recovery!