Dealing With Naysayers
by Louis Tamasi
I think all of us when we make the decision to come over here have to deal with those members of our friends and family that are anti-Philippines. When I made the announcement of my move most of my friends I had in the states said I was making the worst decision of my life, that the Philippines is a 3rd world country or that I was going to get kidnapped by muslims. You know I spent alot of time showing them facts about the Philippines and trying to convince them that it is not all bad, and I swayed a few. But most stood steadfast in their resolve that I was going to goto the Philippines, hate it, and come running home in a week. Well it’s 
been 6 months and I’m still here! What amazes me is that most of the people who have never been here are the ones saying it’s a 3rd world hellhole. My one friend even brought her army niece over one day because she had been here and she could tell me how bad it is. Well of course all she saw was Manila… and as Bob has said “Manila is not the Philippines.” Over time I have found that living here I feel safer walking the streets than I did in my hometown. The people are friendlier and the service better. Even after experiencing all this many friends and family as still unconvinced and I no longer waste my time beating my head against a wall. I have had some friends of mine ask me “Well what do I do about my friends and family that think this is a bad move?” My answer is always the same… Whose life it is yours or theirs? Live your own life and in the fullness of time some of them may come around because they miss you.
Hi Louis - Great post! Your experience and mine are the same, and I’ve talked to plenty of other ex-pats who had the same experience as well. I had friends and family who lectured me about coming to live here, yet they had never been here before!
I myself have not came across much of this although I have only talked to some of my friends and family about moving there sometime in the near future. My family(esp my parents) think it would be a good move, although my brothers don’t really that say much when I mention it, but they don’t say anything negative(although they may think it). I have had a few friends that have questioned the move esp about how we would generate an income, which I tell them our main income would be from renting of my house which I own here in Australia, which would give us around p7000 per week after rates and insurance etc on the property. We have our own place already there in davao(on the same property as my wifes family). would like to have a business there also, but not sure what to do as yet, maybe a resturant?
Hi Louis this post is very good I have the same problem
in my country greece Athens. my friends in greece tell where you
go is very bad country philippines.I am greek my wife philippina antil now I live in athens I take dicision the last year 2006. I find many sites for foreigners in philippines but
the best site for me it is only one of my friend Bob
liveinthephilippines.com I read every day all information and post about life in philippines Bob help me to much I tell him
many thanks . You now hear have many philippino work in greece I ask 3 philippino men is my friend what you think I go to stay and I live in philippines and tell you are crazy you no skirt ( you no be afraid) and also my greek friends.sorry for my english if I write something wrong.
Hi Zois - I am always happy to assist you whenever I can. I hope that we can meet when you visit the Philippines sometime!
Hi Louis—You can blame this negative thinking among most Americans on the State Department and media for issuing these warning signs to the American public to travel to Third world Countries. They usually base their information on isolated cases and extrapolate it to the rest of the country or region. It never ceased to amaze me, that a courageous and adventurous country like the United States, would fall victim to such scare tactics. This is why the European and other countries are beating the Americans in numbers for travelling to the Philippines; Other countries are not discouraging their citizens to travel to Third World Countries. And you’re absolutely right about how much safer you feel walking the streets of the Philippines, compare to the streets in the United States. I feel the same way.
In the Philippines, the main reason you’ll be a victim of a crime is because the offender(s) need the money to live. Unlike the U.S., the offenders are either psyhologically and/or emotionally disturbed, or are under the influence of drugs. I’d rather take my chance with the former offender(s). At least you can reason with them. The latter offenders are so screwed up in the head that you stand a slim chance of not being victimized by them. Till next time….
I see alot of Europeans and Anzacs here especially when I travel to Cebu. As for the American media and state department that’s a whole discussion in and of itself. But far be if for me to start a political discussion.
hi louis most of my friends think im nuts to move to davao, my family is pretty cool about it though. it seems not many of us have a sense of adventure any more.
Good Day All:
Louis, Excellent post!!
I was wondering though is this attitude as Julius states, more from media propaganda or especially among family are they more afraid of you moving and not having you “closer at hand being in the USA” than they are afraid of what could happen to you. Sometimes I think that the ones that are closest to us fear what their life is going to be like after we leave more than what is going to happen in our lives.
Julius:
I would point the finger at the media much, much more than the state dept, although they are not blameless. One, the liberal press here in the USA hates Bush so much that they go out of their way to discredit him, his policies and his entire appointed part of the government. They will even go to the extent of manufacturing false information to do so, just look at Dan Rather. Two, the liberal press has been conditioned that the only way to “get ratings” is by sensationalizing their coverage through negative reenforcement, “Oh No The Sky If Falling said chicken little” and a lot of that attitude comes from what they are taught in school by the liberal members of higher learning in this country that think they are so much smarter than the rest of the people on the country.
Continually the only news that remains fairly objective is Fox news, which is cast by the liberal media as ultra conservative but is in reality is centrist with views more in the middle/moderate where all of the news media should be, but are not. JMHO
wayne - It makes one wonder where the US is going.
Wayne wrote some things I couldn’t help but respond to. I might catch some heat, but oh well…I’ll put on the flame suit just in case.
While all media tends to give false impressions about how good or bad a place is, media will always tend to show the bad stuff. Newspapers are always going to print a story about a plane crash, or even the amount of luggage lost, rather than stories about the hundreds of planes that took off and landed safely today, and the fact that almost all the luggage made it, too. It’s just the nature of media because that’s how they sell newspapers or a network. Look at how much coverage Paris Hilton gets….that’s not media bias, that’s recognizing most media consuming Americans don’t pay attention to the important things in life.
We also have a strange ability to read media from afar and generalize it to a whole town, region, or country. I live 45 minutes from Washington, D.C. on five acres atop a mountain with only two or three neighbors. I don’t have to lock my doors. But if someone living in another country is watching the D.C. local TV channels, reading the news online, etc., they would wonder why anyone lives here or goes out at night. If they did have to visit they’d worry about going up in tall buildings because of the constant “elevated” state of terror threat reported by the “media” but disseminated by the current fear-mongering administration (using fear is an effective way to manipulate people). When my wife was preparing to move here from Davao she actually had someone tell her “Why do you want to move to America?….They have Anthrax and terrorism”. Perhaps folks in other countries are afraid of America because of what they read in their media. The point is we live with these potential (though not likely) threats and would probably chuckle if someone expressed concern about taking a subway or opening the mail. Sure, it could happen….but the odds of dying in a car crash, or even being hit by lighting (especially on top of our mountain) are greater.
Finally, the Fox Noise Channel is not considered mainstream moderate news – not that there’s anything wrong with that. The far right has a right to a voice to “balance” the (and I’ll admit it) left leaning networks. This is the reason Fox was created, and it has become a very effective conduit for this administration to get it’s message and manipulation out (Until recently, anyway. People, even some in the GOP, are generally starting to realize the emperor has no clothes). The only true way to get “fair and balanced” is to watch or read many media outlets and sort through the bias. Avoid listening to biased talk radio hosts (left or right) because soon you’ll find yourself with no thoughts of your own, driving alone in a car and ranting along with the radio host, which in the moment of hysteria could cause an accident. Of course if one is part of the choir and enjoys the same left or right leaning sermons over and over they tend to pick a media outlet and stick with it because they enjoy ranting — it has morphed into entertainment, and that my friends is what the profit motivated media is all about.
Hi Louis:
In this you are SSSSSSSSSOOOOOOOO succinct!! Especially if someone like Hillary gets in, in 08….
I posted a comment that seems to have been deleted. Censored? If so commenting is pointless and reading them unworthy.
Wayne - I never thought that the US might have a female president but we are looking at that possibility now. Not that I am a chavinist, I’m just anti-Liberal
Jon - You did double post, I would never censor a comment unless it contained extremely foul language. Your dupe was deleted the original is here.
i really really could not agree more with you.
Despite my country giving warnings not to live here as my life is in danger, my home town in UK has had 5 muders this year!!!
I hear NEW ORLEANS had 100!! I thinkill stay here
Hi John Pruess:
Well with the vast majority of people that I know the Fox News channel is mainstream news and much more accurate than the liberal news media. The fact that you deliberately called it the Fox Noise channel belies you prejudice and diminishes the relevance on not only that comment but your entire post. The liberal media which you seem to favor has never been able to ever accept that what ever they do as being wrong. Just like Dan Rather, when he got caught barely acknowledged he did anything inappropriate. For my two cents that says it all. He was caught red handed and would not accept the blame. Just like the liberal news media and most liberals in general they can not ever admit that they are wrong, but always keep an air of superior intelligence about them, no matter what the consequences, and in addition to try and make them selves feel better result to act of name calling. Like Fox Noise instead of Fox News. That DOES say it all.
Hi Louis:
My exact feelings !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Well, I like Louis article but the article doesn’t have anything to do with US politics. I thought this is about Philippines! Be mindful, that not all readers here just follows their husbands’ republican preferred party. I for one is a liberal/pro-women right Filipina now in US. I definitely don’t like FOX. I definitely want a female president by the next election.
Hi Mahdy:
Personally I think that there are a number of women who would make a good president, but not Hillary. Hillary does not have the intelligence of the honesty to be president. One example of this is in her own book she states that she never knew about her husbands infidelity. Now she is either lieing or she was to stupid to know. Which one is it? It has to be one of the two, and both are examples why she is not fir to be president. The fact that you would want her as president is a prime example of what many of us believe is what is wrong with the USA. The loss of values for one. Bill Clinton certainly did not have any as his actions bore out and Hillary, buy the fact that she kept him shows that her main objective is political not values.Condoliza Rice would be a much superior choice for one. As far as Fox News goes, well I guess you just do not like the truth and would rather be lied to by the liberal press. Oh well you are a self admitted liberal after all, and that says it all!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Wayne, I guess we have very different mind set. Obviously, you are still stuck with that infidelity issues and can’t move on. Can’t even forgive a person who didn’t commit the sin but the MALE did it. Just really shows to the world how some people are curruptiously righteous they are.
OK, I admit it, I’m a raving radical centrist. I guess I should have gaurded my words a little better. All the cable news channels are “Noise”. The cable channels have to be sensational and swing left or right to be profitable. The Jim Lerher hour on PBS is respected as the most objective and unbiased news program (it’s as if Jim doesn’t have the opinion gene in his body) — and hardly anyone watches it, because it’s not sensational, it’s not entertaining, doesn’t make the blood boil blue or red. That’s because it’s just The News — and it’s not for profit. That’s my main point, but it clearly got lost.
Certainly I’m not right wing, but I’m not liberal either. I’m not a fan of Hillary for reasons that have nothing to do with her being a democrat or a woman. I could vote for a moderate Republican. Could conservative Republicans vote for a moderate Republican? Can the GOP nominate a moderate for the White house? I could vote for a moderate democrat, such as Biden (and forgive his plagerism from way back)…or even an independent. Kucinich is so far to the left he makes me chuckle. Our country is torn badly to the point of fracturing — Devided We Stand is more accurate these days. And the lefty and righty media is fueling this. Gerald Ford recently made many comments on this topic and about this administration in letters and tapes to be made public after his death. Ford healed this country during the greatest political rift prior the situation we are in today. Has this administration ever admited they were wrong about anything? Former President Ford, a very religious man, lamented the influence evangelicals as well as neocons now have within the GOP (though some argue this is already changing). I miss what Ford embodied — he was the last unifying President of this country at a time when divisions were as deep as they are now. Will we ever have another like him? Was he able to do it because he wasn’t elected and not beholden to any special interests from left or right?
Respected GOP leaders and about 2/3 of the country don’t agree with this administration’s policies and direction. Liberals aren’t creating these statistics — liberals had never supported this administration from the git go. Democrats in congress haven’t called for Bush’s impeachment and have been grilled by liberal constituents for not doing so — but the same well known conservative constitutional lawyer who drew up the Clinton impeachment papers made the call last week and Chuck Hagel put impeachment option on the table months ago. These are Republicans (and Hagel is not a moderate, but he did fight in Vietnam). Warner, Lugar, and Domineci recently became the voice of a GOP calling for a new Iraq strategy.
Dan Rather? News anchors or talking heads becoming the news distracts us from the real events and issues (Paris is bad enough).
Could anyone, including Hillary, possibly lead is into a more troubled situation than we are already in? The USA is in a tough spot in Iraq and getting out isn’t going to be more or less easy, consequential, or deadly than staying. Iraq is a problem for which there are no good solutions — all bad, no matter who ends up in the White House next. Wayne, we actually have something in common. I’ve been an off and on naturalist/tour leader in the Galapagos Islands and upper Amazon basin in Ecuador for almost 15 years. Bagged a lot of birds and unusual reptiles with my 80-200 mm Nikkor zoom (wouldn’t mind killing several thousand ferile goats on the islands, though). BTW Louis, I couldn’t agree more with your great original post. I didn’t start the political media comments, but I did pile on and lead this discussion off topic. Sorry about that. I look forward to reading more and responding less to your articles.
Hi Mahdy:
I will agree that we disagree, but you want to know the reason why I hold it against him the most? I voted for the Bill twice and he wasn’t honest enough to admit his affair with Lewinszki (sp). It is not the act that I hold against Bill or Hillary it is the lack of acknowledgment. The lies. Now if she is telling the truth that she never knew or even suspected then she really does not have the intelligence to lead this country and if she did know the fact that she is lieing illustrates why she it unfit to lead this country. Look at the real problem and do not try to over simplify this behavior of deception. If you do you only strengthen the argument that you are trying to discredit.
In respect to the site owner and the authors here, I’m not going to respond anymore on this blaming, bantering, mouth bashing and putting others party or views down.
Hi Wayne–I agree, the media should take most of the heat, but the state department knows where the fires are. Till next time….
Hello….anybody out there…Bob..???……is this you…???…..i was looking for the site called “Live in the Philippines”……..i feel like i stepped into the twilight world CNN………….the reason i am moving to the Phili is so i do not have to listen to this Junk….lets get back to the Phili….i can turn to Fox, CNN, MSNBC….anytime i want…..Bill Huff..?????????????
Hello All!
Please do us a favor, please discuss US politics in another forum/site. This is about living in the Philippines, plus we have non-American readers here. Thanks!
Bill and Tina are correct. Please stop the discussion about US Politics. This is not the place for it! It only ends up souring the whole discussion.
Hi Everyone–I agree. Bill and Tina are right. Keep it within the topic of “Dealing With Naysayers.” That’s an interesting topic in itself. Let’s keep Hillary, CNN, and the State Department out of it. Till next time….
Just why I stepped out of it, I didn’t want a political discussion… ah there’s nothing like thread drift.
My apologies to all and especially to Louis for wrecking his thread. I’m usually very busy and don’t post. I’ve been in bed nursing a bad back for a few days and have way too much time on my hands and obviously follow politics way too closely. Perhaps this thread can be restored. Louis, why don’t you delete the political comment posts starting with my first post. I don’t think Wayne would mind. I know Mahdy won’t mind…she’s my wife! Again, I’m sorry for the ranting thread drift.
Louis:
Please delete all of the political posts I made. My apologies.:oops:
Hi siniores ke sinioras vamos para bailar salsa and cubia. lets go for dans salsa and cubia the life is too small.
Manana another day. In davao there is salsa latina musica yes or
no.
regards Athens Greece
Hi Wayne and Jon - No need to worry about the Political posts. I’ll just leave them all up, it’s part of the blog now! When people are involved in good conversation, the topic can turn anywhere, so nothing to worry about!
Hi Zois - Not much salsa music in Davao. For that kind of thing, best to go to Zamboanga City, it is known as “Asia’s Latin City”
Hi bob many thanks for your information about Asia”s latin City
in Zamboaga city I am surprise for you. You know everything about the life in mindanao for philippine life and you have open
minds. Yes it is good idea you speak for political posts if any
one no like turn another site. Like TV if you no like you turn
another chanel of TV.Also in greece talk about the political
this is life some people like political some no like.
regards
Hi,
Bakit naman? I am expecting from our families and friends the support going back home. Maybe there are some reasons cguro na tataas ang kilay?
Anyway, in our case, my swedish husband is really eager to move to Davao, where we have a bahay-kubo. Our wonder is that our 15 yr old daughter is a bit worried. Oh! she love to come back and spend some times in Davao. But she is to scared to missed her school & friends.
If you ask friends & relatives of my hubby? They think we’re cool and they are kinda envious.
We have their support but we, are a bit worried how life will be? Moving isn’t jst a matter of moving. You have to think the future life in the country your living in. Living outside Philippines for quite sometimes, makes you a non-filipino mentality. All things must be well-planned.
Anyhow, what i want to say to you Louis, is that, follow your feelings. If you really intended to move back, am glad for your decision. In awhile, me & my family will be there too, for GOOD.
WELCOME BACK HOME.
//chie