Last year I was visited by a shipmate that had broken his “Augmented Teeth” (As with breast implants we no longer call them false teeth) we sat at Texas Joe’s and he devoured a Buber Burger, and he amazed me not that he ate the burger but the amount of beer he drank. (LOL) Now that I’m in the process of doing away with the old naturals I’ve had to come up with ingenious ways of eating. The soups and Mami are good but three times a day? I think not, I know my wife and daughters can eat rice morning noon and night, but even though I love potatoes in all the varied ways they can be served I could not eat them three times a day either.
I desire beef, pork chicken and filleted fish with my meals, enter the blender. While at the meat shop I picked up a Corned Beef Brisket to be the first Sunday dinner upon receipt of my new choppers, a boiled New England Dinner Hmmmm good. While there the young lady pointed out they had fresh cooked corned beef ready to eat. I almost passed until I remembered “The Blender” Garlic mashed potatoes with corned beef. I was in heaven. Could one blend a Pizza? Call Sam’s Pizza and ask.
While out last Tuesday Mayang wanted to stop at Texas Joes for lunch and I’m thinking; “My oh my, she is one cruel lady!” I was sure that porridge or gruel was not on the menu. So I looked and found cream of mushroom soup, Not this month I thought, Gil Lee the manager stopped by and knew of my problem and said; “Paul, Road kill Chili and corn bread.” A sainted man he is and a fine lunch I had.
Vasco’s on Subic Bay has a Chicken Curry soup that is absolutely great even with the teeth I had in my twenty’s two bowls will fill me up. Mongolian BBQ at By-the-Sea Resort is another taste sensation I can avail of with gusto. Or breakfast at Sit-N’-Bull’s consisting of flaky corned beef hash and three eggs over easy. (Skip the toast and have a corn bread muffin instead.)
Alright my fears were relived, using my cagy mind and being inventive I have eaten rather well this past week or so. I never reached the eating a Buber Burger status or skill level but I didn’t wither away or pass out from acute hunger pains.
Now for the technical side, this week (As you are reading this) I will be fitted with a set of temporary (Six month) Augmented Teeth which cost PNP 8,000.00 plus PNP 600.00 per extraction the extractions are good forever, the temporary augmented teeth are good for the six months, I just wanted to clear that up. But my friend Big “P” says they will last longer if you’re out of money or too lazy to go back for the next fitting I will get up from the chair, smile a big smile for the first time in months and drive straight to Texas Joe’s for an order of Baby Back Ribs, if I have no trouble eating that, it will have been all worthwhile. Because I think I’ll bring my dentist and his wife (A dentist also) to lunch and they can adjust them if I fail at eating the ribs.
I dearly hope that none of my readers ever have to go through this, but if you already have, then you have my deepest respect. But more than the food, over these past few months I’ve missed returning the smiles to the folks I encounter in my day to day meanderings around the Isle of Luzon. The closed mouth smile never really looks that sincere.
Paul, I love the new term you use for Artificial Choppers and will begin using Augmented Teeth as more PC way of communicating when speaking of the Dentally Challenged. As for dietary concerns you will find that after a short while you will have very little need for the blender with or without the dental appliances. I am positive the beer will sooth the sore gums in short order and also aids in softening harder foods that would otherwise be at the very least difficult to masticate and swallow. To find a good steak you only need follow a toothless person since they can only eat the most tender of steaks. They can also lead you to some good watering holes!
Joe;
I ran a tenderloin steak through the blender last night, but I did marinate it in beer first. I think Wednesday I pick up my Augmented teeth and the rest of that day will be nothing but a blurred memory, as I’m heading to the Barrio after my ribs. “Barrio, stand by for heavy rolls….” I’ll shout upon arriving.
Hanging on to mine as long as I can, not good now but will have to surrender one day.
John J.;
I can’t blame you for that, I fought the valiant fight and amassed a fortune in dental bills (Well worth it) until finely they gave up the ghost. I wish this pm no fellow human but the last two years have not been pleasant. Hang on as long as you can.
Paul, I remember my dad used to take his OUT to eat! As for longevity, can’t remember how long I’v had mine, but more than 30 yrs!
John Power;
It has been worrying me, as I won’t even have them until later in this week. I’m not sure about any of it, but my friends who have got Augmented Teeth tell me I’ll be just fine, and that really does help. Once they are in my mouth I don’t think they’ll be out except for cleaning. I’ve found that this week I can’t pronounce many words and that I really don’t like. I’ve always had that trouble writing!!!
Whistling is out of the question now. You can’t whistle with out teeth, when you get your new ones, you will live with the fear you will blow the out LOL
True Joe. It can be a bit embarrassing when they “flop about” when you talk, or eat!
John Power;
Flopping about? The dentist and I would have to have a serious talk.
Joe;
Never was that good at whistling to begin with, a short twerp to call a dog was about it. But I’ve heard what you’re talking about and if it happens I’ll take them to be tuned. (lol)
Hi Paul. Good luck with your new teeth and thanks always for the great articles. But please, where is the meat shop with the corned beef?
Ray B.
Baretto Meat 500 meters past Dryden Hotel on the right heading towards Eba. (German bar on the floor above.)
A perpetual optimist you are. The first day of your new teeth and you are going to put them through the super test. Take it a little easy Paul, new teeth are like new to small shoes and make sours real quick. It will take a while to adjust to them but I have full faith that upon my return we will be able to have a corn on the cob eating contest. A couple of ears before switching to SMB,s or rum and coke.
Loren;
I’ll toughen those gums up with calluses and damn the pain, I’m gonna eat all the foods I’ve been missing for the past six months. But I’ll wait for you for the corn-on-the-Cob. Tommy will be in port in a week or two, so let the cocktails flow.
Paul,
One of my riding brothers (a German national) has a company outside of Manila. He makes dentures, crowns, etc. for export to Europe. Basically, he receives the molds on Monday, has a crew that makes the permanent teeth and over nights back to Europe by Friday. Its a lot cheaper than having them made in Europe.
He also has dental holidays for Aussies who want a set of teeth while on holiday in the Phils. Usually 1 full week will have you in a set of new teeth.
If your new teeth are not made locally, pm me and will forward his contact details.
BTW, was on the floating bar this past Sunday. Great day out, wont be long til the the monsoon season has them dry docked.
Don
Don;
Thanks but I pick up the augmented teeth Wednesday and they cost PNP 8,000.00 for the 6 month temps, so I think I’m good, but thanks for the kind offer.
Which Floating bar do you like? Arizona is good, but I like the Blue Rock I’ll know the monsoons are over when they refloat them. Holy crap then the Christmas season will b starting!
Just had an afterthought Paul, think of those ice cold SMBs that will slide down “without pain”.
John J.
As if an SMB would ever hurt me. (lol)
Paul, as someone relatively beef-deprived these days, I well understand your desire to chomp on some good beef. Hope you can and do again soon. Wish I could just go get some where you can, but hey, lack thereof is one of the trade-offs of my wife’s choice of location.
To today’s point, immediately after the 6:30pm ABS/CBN news (“TV Patrol”), I glanced up to see a commercial clearly featuring “Jeepsilog”. Now we all know that something-silog translates to “rice-with-something-topping”. As in “Tapsilog” means rice with (beef?) Tapa topping, LogSilog means rice with egg (itlog) topping, and “DogSilog” means rice with (hot)dog topping (the parenthesis might suggest presence of certain type of “dog” depending on venue).
Thus in context of several of your recent postings, I have this vision of you chomping down on some rice with tasty Jeepney topping. Hmmmm yummmm!
JeepSilog!!!!!!!!!! Gotta get some!
Either way, enjoy your new teeth when you get them; you’re about a decade ahead of me. Hope I can keep enough of mine for a while yet & put them to good use. (But not on Jeepsilog!)
Ed;
I eat rice once or twice a week, I like a hand full of French fries, and a few green beans but when I feel the need to eat thousands of the same item at one time I go for the rice. But I admire your honesty with that one statement; “My wife’s choice of location.” I had one retired Air Force guy try to tell me he lived 30 miles from the nearest village, and 2 hours to a not so good store and summed it up by saying. “I live here for the view!”
I tried to spend my way into keeping my teeth for as long as I can, but sometimes it’s like that old car we loved, it just isn’t worth it anymore. I had a good run with them we’ll see how the augmented teeth turnout.
You will be eating nice tender steak (maybe not tender, in the Phil.) again soon Paul with your new choppers before you know it, hope your recovery will be quick.
I imagine that one day , I will also be going through the same procedure as you.
Oh one last thing, I have called breast implants and breasts without implants many different things, but never once called them false teeth,,,,
Bill S.
As with me, I referred to breast implants as augmented breasts and now want dentures referred to as augmented teeth. Apples and oranges but I do remember false boobs on many a high school girl when I was young.
If one lives in the right area you can eat beef as good as if in Australia or the United States, I buy Tenderloin at the Royal store and it is fantastic. (But not a bargain)
Paul –
Now that you mentioned augmented breasts and augmented teeth, what is the difference between the two? One is removable, one isn’t.
Plus, augmented teeth, you can take it back to the dentist for adjustment. Try doing that with augmented breasts. LOL
John;
Augmented: having been made greater in size or value
Teeth if you go from zero to a full set that is an increase in size. The fact that a steak is now able to be consumed absolutely increases the value. Removal of either breasts or teeth was not part of the definition. Who would want to remove breasts? (lol). I volunteer to adjust any breasts and save the wearer the long trip to her doctor’s office. The teeth? You’re on your own.
Paul –
I, for one, am not at all impressed by augmented breasts. Now, I know that some men are attracted to women with large breasts, natural or artificial. That’s fine. I, on the other hand, am very much turned off by women with large breasts. Then, there are those who appreciate a nice pair of legs. I’ll pass, as well.
When it comes to visually appreciating women, we each have our own preferences as to what constitutes beauty, and we each have our own way in how we allow our eyes to wander on the landscape in order to arrive at that conclusion. This entails a sweeping “ocular inspection” of the lay of the land, and must be done unobtrusively within a millisecond, or you run the risk of being called a DOM. LOL With that said, how do your eyes travel from point to point on the landscape when inspecting it, Paul? 🙂
John;
As they walk away I’ll be looking and they don’t know I’m staring. My wife who knows my predilection to that part of the anatomy will give me a nudge and point with her lips if a cute one goes by and I’ve missed it. In my single days after that has gotten my attention, the smile will keep me interested.
LOL You and I have the same preference on THAT particular part of a woman’s anatomy, Paul!
John’
We are wise men indeed.
Mr. Paul T. Greetings from across the bay (Cavite.) I hope you are getting used to your new “choppers”. Tell me, can you now whistle Dixie? Cheers. 🙂
Jose Porfirio;
Just go to Grande Island and take a left and Cavite is in the windshield. Are you here for a visit?
Mr. Paul T. Yes, I am actually in Tagaytay visiting a (female) friend originally from Lowell, MA. 🙂 Enjoy your liquid lunch/dinner with a cold SMB. Salud.
Jose;
Enjoy your time home, but a few months ago when you were up to your ears in New England snow, is when I would have planned my trip. (LOL) But the hot season is still a fine time to visit also.
Paul’s painless plates of plastic pegs to partake in pleasant pork pieces………….yup, I’m bored at work!
Cheers
AJ UK
AJ UK;
Are you allowed to take coffee (tea) breaks at the Pub? That might help. (lol)
I shall have a chat with the patron saint of beer St. Michael or more commonly known as San Miguel (and not the ladies variety!).
AJ UK:
I’ve gotten some bad advice in the past from that particular saint. But now that I go to church at Our Lady of San Miguel, things have improved.