Why if something is purchased and brought home here in the Philippines, and is not a consumable such as food or drink, it becomes a permanent part of your life? We all know about the boxes that appliances come in, they are stored, long after the appliance has been replaced. Now I found a way to rid myself of those boxes and wrote about it a year or two ago. But for those who don’t want to look it up, (people like me) I’ll tell you again.
I had just returned from sea, and my wife and girls had just moved into our newly built house. I noticed in a spare room there were boxes upon boxes piled neatly to the roof. And I wondered why, at the house we had rented, her reason was; “Honey Ko, in case we move.” So using that logic, I asked her if she was going to divorce me, with a pained look on my face. “Why you ask me that?” she wanted to know. I explained that when I saw all those boxes I thought she was moving again. By the end of the week, they were all recycled and gone.
Both our girls are gone from the house, and their two bedrooms are chocker-block full of everything they’ve ever owned. Plus all old clothing, toys belonging to my granddaughter are added monthly to the mix. While the rest of the house remains fairly clutter free, the bedrooms are a free fire zone.
There are people in our family who could use many of these items we store, but the four ladies will part with nothing. One of the bed (storage) rooms has a space for my ironing board, and yes I press my own shirts, one reason is I’m good at it (22 years Military, and a bachelor for most of my life. Also I find it a mindless relaxing thing to do. But there in my way is a treadmill with a little electric (rechargeable) four wheel dirt thing-a-ma-bob, for kids to ride on. I’ve been looking at it sitting there for six years, and wondered if it still even worked.
Out it came and I charged it, and it did run. It belonged to my granddaughter. I got to thinking about my niece Nicky-Nicky (Do they stutter here?) and at 3 years old she was the right age and weight to use it. So I gave it to her.
One would have thought I’d burned the house down, Mayang called YoHanna and told her what I’d done, and YoHanna called me and said she was saving it. Well hell, I knew that! So I asked her for who was she saving it for? No answer, so she decided Nicky-Nicky could borrow it but someday she wanted it back. I told her that was fine with me, and told her I’d replace it if was broken. I’ll be dead and gone, before she ever thinks about it again. By the way my granddaughter didn’t seem to care about what I’d done.
Also in the bedrooms is every empty bottle of perfume, they’d ever had, cassette tapes that are useless now. All their school books from college, which could have been sold or donated (what am I dreaming or something) and items that I have no idea what they are. But I know they are still there.
I think I’ll sit them all down and make them watch that TV show “Hoarders”, and hire that guy who comes and talks them into giving it away, Or call Frank and Mike from that show the “Pickers” and see if I can make a Peso or three.
Do you think this will work? I’ll gather the Ladies together and tell them that for each new thing I buy them, they must give an old item away! What the heck am I smokin’, that would never work.
When they start moving stuff into my “Man Cave” that’s when I’ll draw that line in the sand, as they walk over it to store more stuff there, for I have found a way to keep the clutter to a manageable level in my “Man Cave” I lend tools to my Brother-in-Laws and never see them again, it frees up a lot of space.
I’ll settle for that win with the boxes years ago. Now I sit and wonder why I even try tugging on Superman’s cape. Go have a beer Paul, and don’t think about it again!
One Niece was made very happy in the writing of this article. Plus my four ladies were made nervous that I was going to go mad and start giving away their stuff, the treadmill is next, come and get it!
Paul, there is a program on TV here in what’s left of America called “Hoarders — Buried Alive”. It must be a real money maker for the producers because I frequently come across it when channel surfing, seems to be on TV all the time.
Maybe you need to download it or find out when it comes on in your town and talk the ladies into watching it. Then try to explain to them that this is what is going to happen to them in a few years. Of course you will be in the dog house, big time then, but it might make a point. Seems that “hoarding” is a “sickness” condition, according to some shrinks.
Rich;
We get it on the Dream Satellite system here, but except for the junk room they keep it all in a neat fashion. I just can’t understand the need to keep it all.
Paul,
Guys tend to have bigger toys (tools, cars, bikes, hunting/fishingetc) that have to be kept out in the garage or man cave. Women keep smaller things in the bedroom / living areas in open sight. But then I still have a jar full of nuts and bolts that I add to but rarely take out. And the cans of half used paint and oil creating a fire hazard that will come in handy one day. I guess we all hoard something…
Don;
Oh!, How right you are, I have a large Gold Locker (Nuts and Bolts) and many cans of paint, but we will need it someday! (lol)
Great article again Paul. Over the years, I got a lot of exercise with several of those treadmill things. We would buy one and I would lug it into the house, it would gather dust and I would lug it to goodwill. Later the ole woman would need another one, generally in a new house, we moved a lot, and I would get my exercise again lugging it in and setting it up in just the right place to be in the way and gather the maximum amount of dust. The last time I tried to give one to goodwill they did not want it, they had too many that they could not get rid of. Just in case I need some exercise again we have a delux motorized model waiting in the back room to be carried somewhere.
Big P;
We enjoyed our trip to Texas Joe’s last Friday. I will tell your wife I have a treadmill for you, and I’ll deliver it! I’ll even dust it off!
You will deliver it ha ha; I doubt you could get it out of the room it is in, let alone the house. I have seen your lovely wife and the way her and my wife get along I would wager she probably has a bolo hidden somewhere and you could never sneak the tread mill out without your way of life being threatened. After all, they may need to use it just any day now to maintain their beauty. What kind of husbands would we be to deprive them of this wonderful beauty-making machine?
Big P
You’re right, getting it past Mayang would be impossible, getting it into the New Old car would be a miracle. We could hook a generator to it and use the dogs to power electricity.
Paul , I doubt very seriously that the ladies in your household suffer from the so-called “hoarder’s complex”. Personally, I think it has more to do with a combination of emotional attachment to their favorite objects as a fond reminder of their happy childhood and that admirable Filipino character trait of frugality of avoiding waste. The Filipino word for this is, “sayang”. The thinking is that, if those boxes can be used sometime in the future, why get rid of it? A poster once commented that his Pinay wife who had just recently arrived in the States was loath to get rid of plastic grocery bags as they can be used at a later time for a number of reasons. Once again, the word, “sayang”, comes into play here.
Ricardo;
I believe you’re right, they don’t really hoard, it’s just some things they can’t seem to part with, I joke with them about it, and they explained its memorable items they like to keep. So I’ll grunt about it and let them have their way. But that treadmill has got to go!
You could get them to have a good old fashion American garage sale. Make some money with that precious junk so you can buy more rum. 😛
Darin: I’ve never seen a garage sale here… I wonder if it would go over well.
Ditto, John.
Bob;
You’re a man of few words! (lol)
Ha ha.. please tell Feyma… she needs convincing on that, Paul!
Bob;
And on the days when we are silent, they’ll ask; “What’s wrong Honey Ko?” We’ll never win (lol)
John;
They would wonder why you were selling your garage, yet keeping your car!
You may be right!
Darin;
An ukay-ukay would be the closest thing to a garage sale here. Ukay-ukay is clothing that was shipped here to aid in calamities, but was high jacked and sold for a profit.
I think a yard sale would go over great there in the Phillipines if you could get any body to have one! From reading Pauls post here and some of the comments not sure if that would ever happen there.
I doubt if a garage sale would go over well in the Philippines, but this is just my personal opinion. I may be wrong, but I am inclined to think that the average Filipino would not dare be seen rummaging through used clothing at a peso each to wear for work or school, and neither would anyone start a garage sale for exactly the same reason as not wanting to be seen at one. The reason is a misplaced sense of pride, an oddity of Filipino culture. For a country that has a high incidence of poverty, it is a great embarassment for the average Pinoy to be perceived as dirt poor – both for visiting a garage sale and for starting one. I don’t even think they have consignment stores there like Goodwill, do they?
Hi Ricardo – Ever heard of Ukay Ukay? It is organized selling of used clothing. Filipinos flock to the Ukay Ukay places! There are so many people there that you can barely walk through.
Bob;
We get door to door ukay-ukay in our area, the ladies love it!
We don’t have door to door ukay ukay here as far as I am aware, but there are hundreds, perhaps thousands of ukay ukay shops in the City.
Bob: We have door to door here… and there are ukay ukay shops all over. Thinking further about a garage sale, I think it could be popular, but I think the HOA in our compound may have a problem with it. The other thing I was thinking is that people normally keep things here, working or not.
Juanito had a bunch of broken toys (Cheap chinese plastic stuff) that I was going to throw out… Rebecca just about had a stroke… give it to the poor!
John;
Thank you John for reinforcing my point “Give It Away” it will never happen!
Bob;
We have many door to door, and only a few shops! Difference in Latitudes?
Ricardo;
I think your reasoning is on the mark, but ukay-ukay seems totally acceptable. It’s hard to figure. There are second hand stores that sell appliances and tools, and believe it or not they used to have something like a flea market here in Olongapo years ago. The police stopped it as the felt that most of what was being sold was stolen.
hi ric,
there are actually folks here who do have yard or garage sales every now & then but the stuff they sell are mostly books, bric-a-brac, outdated appliances, old media products like casettes, laser discs, etc. clothes & toys tend to get donated, although it’s not unusual for stuff you donated to end up in an ukay-ukay store for some reason! ” )
cheers,
Biz Doc;
If you come across an 8-track player, let me know. (lol) I wish I could donate to anyone, some of this stuff we’ve collected.
hi paul,
too bad i don’t know how an 8-track player looks like! ” ) hehe
cheers,
Biz Doc;
I’ll send pictures! (lol) they were from the 1970’s a few years after I was born (33 to be exact)
Ricardo,
Ukay-ukay is a very profitable business even here in the Middle East, you know wny? because a lot of Filipinos flock and buy these items at dirt cheap prices. But nonetheless, the Pinoys usually select and buy BRANDED ITEMS to instead of unknown brands. kahit na ukay, imported naman hahaha.
Dan;
I believe the concept of a yard sale would not go over well here, can you picture all the happy men being dragged every Sunday by their wife to go look at other peoples over priced junk?
Paul..thats a great idea you could suggest to your Wife and Daughters…Yard Sale…if nothing else would be another fun story you could put on here some day!
Dan;
Pawning it would make more sence to the girls, then they have to option to buy it back.
Problem with garage or trunk sale is that they (the seller) does not want to sell at a reasonable price. My wife bought a blouse for $50 so she thinks its worth $45. Really, no one would pay more than $5 for a used garment, no matter what condition. Its the mentality of I paid a lot for something and dont want to give it away so rather keep it even if its not used.
Don;
I think you hit the nail right on the head when you said; “I paid a lot for something and don’t want to give it away, so rather keep it even if its not used.” I believe that is their logic.
Don: Many of the Ukay Ukay near here advertise “nothing over 30 Pesos” and similar. Rebecca shops there frequently, since many of the clothes are actually new… For instance, she bought a bunch of Tshirts promoting US radio stations, fat American size for me, costing 15 Pesos each… Still in the original box. They were left over after the radio promotions. There is a lot of stuff like that at Ukay Ukay, if you are willing to pick through it (She also got a bunch of brand new Oshkosh kids clothes, last year’s design, for around P20 per piece)
If I could convince my wife to donate her clothes to the ukay ukay, that would be awesome. But as mentioned, problem lies in her inability to give something of perceived value to herself away. Also, she is over 1.7 meters tall, which sorta limits the population that can WEAR her size 😉
Feyma loves to shop at the Ukay Ukay too. For our oldest son, Chris, he wears size 13 shoes, and usually ukay ukay is the only source we can find for that size.
Wow, size 13 would be tough here! I can sympathize trying to find wide sizes here.
Bob;
Size 13 shoe? If he becomes a Merchant Marine we’ll steal his shoes and use them for lifeboats! (LOL)
John;
Those t-shirts and kid’s item in the ukay-ukay were more than likely donated by a North American, European, of Australian who though they were helping out in disaster relief. But you can find some good stuff, and like you said sometimes brand named.
I was going off the wife’s input, that everything is for sale in the Philippines. So in a way a sale of your stuff would make sense but then again I don’t live there. HAHA! You could donate the boxes to the homeless……….
Darin;
Your wife is very correct, just about everything here is for sale, but they just have their own way of doing it. Boxes for the homeless (Housing Challenged) that was very funny.
My parents take items that we don’t use in the States (clothes, toys, old eyeglasses, etc.) and bring it with them to their Barangay. They give it away to their neighbors who are poor. The last time I was there, I saw people wearing my old clothes and kids playing with my old toys. I saw an old lady wearing my old Def Leppard shirt from the 80s!
Opus;
Now that is a great idea, and since your parents are probably well known, so the items will get to the people that need them. And now I know where all those old Rock & Roll T-shirts are coming from!
Paul,
It sounds like my father who is almost 80 years old and lives in Ohio. He goes to Garage Sales every week with his brother for something to do. Always claims he gets a bargain at them. He has so much stuff in his garage and other places that he claims he will need someday. Well my oldest brother collects old motorcycles, but ran out of space at his place. So he started storing them in my fathers garage. Well now my father is complaining now he doesn’t have enough room to store his junk he collects from garage sales. Aren’t you supposed to downsize when you get his age? He even brings me things he gets at sales when he visits me in Florida. Well hopefully you can start downsizing soon, but if not its just one of those things you have to do to keep peace in the house. Take care and be safe. Just remember its Christmas season and there is still of plenty room to store things in the bedrooms lol.
Papa Duck;
Maybe your Dad is the original “Picker” like Frank and Mike from that History Channel show, I say; “If it keeps him happy, let him do it.” But your brother taking up his valuable space in the garage is another matter entirely, and must be addressed quickly, before the first truck from Ohio arrives to fill up your new patio there in Florida!
hi papa duck,
maybe that’s what keeps your pop up & about, like how my mom plays mahjong to keep active. she’s 82 and could easily take a nap whenever i visit, but when she’s with her playmates for a quorum, heck they could literally play all day with food served at tableside so they needn’t get up for a bite! ” )
cheers,
Open an antique store and call your items antiques. You could always tell your wife that you spotted little critters living among the stored items and the local pest control guy says to get rid of it to get rid of the critters. Or you could say you were rummaging through looking for one thing or another and saw ghosts hiding in the shadows. Or you could bribe the local priest to come by and beg for donations of unused items to give to the poor. Or you could just live with it and think of other things-like Mouth to Mouth training. (-:
Ron;
Those are great suggestions and thank you for a my morning laugh, Ghosts was the one that got me! Thanks again.
I give my family three months notice before I have a massive clean-out. I know how they feel about their empty boxes and dust collectors. They get a reminder once a month until the deadline arrives lol.
Boss;
If I tried that, I’d be living full time in the “Man Cave” with my music and my ref full of beer. Wow, what would be wrong with that? I going with your plan today.
Hi Paul – You have a lot of stuff. You can sell them. Usually toys and clothing during Christmas garage sales are the ones that sell fast. Some people don’t like to throw away or give or sell stuff-. I think it’s for sentimental reasons. Especially if it’s something you have had for a long time now. We have PS1 one here, I don’t even even why were’ not selling it. Ha ha.
Sugar;
It reminds me of a guy that collected calendars from 1999, he had thousands of them. When asked why, he said: “When 1999 comes around again they’ll be worth a fortune!”
Paul,
Prior to heading to L.A., Jeanne & I spent a lifetime of 2 weeks moving from our townhouse to another house. When we first moved to our 2bedroom townhouse(+basement) from a 5 bedroom house, I told Jeanne that she’d have to throw some stuff out, it wouldn’t all fit. “No problem, I’ll handle it” she said, and for the next 6 years I’d have to turn sideways to make it from one end of our basement to the other. So, when we relocated in August, I said, “Jeanne, you seriously have to get rid of some of this stuff before we move because there is no way it’ll ever fit & I’m not living in a situation like that again!!!” (note the three exlamation marks which mean that I’m REALLY serious this time & putting my foot down!).
So, because things ended up as you’d expect, I couldn’t find a few boat-related boxes that we needed to bring. You know, silly “men things” like winches, the shaft for our self-steering windvane, that sort of foolishness. But, wouldn’t you know it? The clothes that my wife has kept since we first met in Taiwan are perfectly safe, as are enough shoes, purses & jewelry to rev Imelda’s engine, and EVERY stitch of clothing that my wife has ever bought in Canada! “Honey, you don’t wear those old clothes, why don’t you dump them?” “No, I’m going to send them to the Philippines!” “But, Darling, you’ve been saying that for years & you never do it.” “Because, I told you, they will disappear if I’m not there to watch them!” “Well, you’d better start dating some guy in the Air Force, because you’ll need a C-130 to get all of that stuff there!” (Place emoticon of guy beating head against wall, here.)
I’m convinced that Filipinos don’t like “used” anything. When we moved, I was getting rid of some tools that I didn’t need on the boat & offered them to the movers(Filipino). One of them took the variable speed polisher, because it’d never been out of the box/wrapping, but nothing else, including some very expensive auto tools. I’m not sure if I can move to a country where I could throw away tools because no other guy wanted to save them. Scares the bejeesus out of me just thinking about it! Now, any advice on installing a rice cooker & water heater cannister on a boat?
Mike;
50 feet of Manila hemp line, a covered rubber raft, attach line to stern and tow a raft full of your wife’s clothes behind your boat. Just a thought!
You met a man that turned down free tools? I in shock over that, it’s a first for me. Because of the little light on my wife’s rice cooker, I call it the eternal flame.
Senior,
Prying ourselves loose of those items that you think you might need is hard to do.
When we moved to our apartment from our house I was generous to my son how lives here in Jax and gave him darn near everything I held dear. Smiled with him in the sunshine and cried in my pillow in the moonlight. My asawa was not so generouse she brought darn near everything. Her moment will be coming soon because now were down to 19 months till we leave for Subic Bay. I explained to her we are only taing about 10 to 15 BB Boxes. I guess the relectance of giving her stuff up comes from her childhood they didn’t has much so keeping what you had is important to her. As seh says to me “I worked for it so I’m keeping it”. Her day for crying in her pillow in the moonlight is coming.
Bruce;
Go ahead and reserve the 20 foot container now, because your wife will win this discussion. Wife 1 Husband 0 (lol)
Senior,
Knowing my awasa (as I Think I do?) she loves shopping and the I’ve already baited the hook and tossed it in the water. Game plan give her the money to buy everything new over their for the house and have her decorate it. I know she take the bait like a Lapu Lapu. Do you know of any shopping partners to assist her so we could sit on a deck and drink SMB and swap lies?
Bruce;
The best laid plans of mice and men…. I see it like this, the shopping for new stuff was going to happen anyway. You’ll still need that 20 foot container to ship her old stuff that she will not part with, and you’ll lose a bedroom or two here to store it all. Welcome home shipmate! (lol)
LOL +1, better surrender now & save the mental anguish! I came up with the same bright idea! Now, she’s shipped much, has more waiting to go, and expects a shopping spree when we get back to The RP. The next such “great idea” that hatches in my brain is getting a one-way trip to the boat’s ice box!
Mike;
So you’re going through what, Bruce is going to go through? We’ll never win, and I don’t know why we even try!
Senior
Man did I have a Dilexit tnemoM in my gnilleps LOL
Bruce;
There is no way I could argue with that statement!