On Facebook the other day a lady from my hometown group in Boston asked me why I live in the Philippines. In a short synopsis I explained that I started living here because I was working as a seaman and all my ships were in Asia plus I liked it and the people were good to me.
Plus I had met and married my wife here. Of course I told her as time went on I was now retired and what was available to me in the states no longer appealed to me. I grew up in the 50’s and 60’s when the political party didn’t matter as much as the value of the person running for office. I have voted for members of both parties. And that is all the politics for this week.
Also I was happily married, owned a house, and had put down roots. I’m quite contended with my life here. I have no opinion of any of the politics in the Philippines as I feel it is the Filipino and not the guests of the Philippines who should have a say in how their country is ran.
Now back to the know-it-all lady (?) from Boston, who had told me she had never visited, Asia but seemed to know all there was to know about it. I explained that I have visited 90% of Asia and have lived here for over 25 years, and still didn’t know as much about Asia as she seemed to know. I found that to be amazing.
But I will explain to my fellow LiP readers what she knows! We men want very young women, who are subservient to our every whim, women we can treat badly and get away with it.
I pondered her reasons and thought, no, the real truth is, I tried western women many years ago and found them extremely lacking (FOR ME). This applies to me, not you or any guy who has a successful relationship with his western girl friend or wife. But she is a shining example of why my feelings are this way.
I enjoyed the ladies in the Caribbean and central and South America. But at that time I was single and was remaining single until I had enough money banked so when I was retired I would lack for nothing in my future. The last loan I ever had was in 1978 when I wanted a brand new Lincoln Towncar. From then until today, if I couldn’t pay cash, I did without. That is why I had all those new old cars over the years. I have a new car now.
Sadly I failed to convince Boston lady, as her mind was made up. I felt no envy for the guy that won that prize. And I was reassured by her that I had made the right decision in moving here.
All the foreigners I’ve met here in the past twenty five years, seemed to have found what they were looking for, and the ones who didn’t returned home. They had not in any way failed; this country was just not for them. If on their return they met that lady from Boston, then I’d have to say; “I guess they have failed.”
Here on LiP we have picked apart all aspects of living here on these Isles of Enchantment, no one island is better than the other, it is just the Island we liked. No spouse’s age should matter to anyone except the two in that marriage. Renting or buying a domicile is a personal judgment no matter what the oracles tell you. Buying a car or motorcycle or riding public transportation is one more choice that is given to you as your right.
Like the lady from Boston, I too have lived there in Boston, as well as many other locations around this big round ball, while she has never been to where we live, and is talking out of her arse about Asia.
I can’t and won’t speak for anyone else, (Well maybe Sir Bob (LOL).) but this is the place we want. If you’re looking for me, on a mountain on Bataan is where I’ll be!
A quick addendum:
The subject of age can cause trouble!
If an older man marries a younger woman here in the Philippines, it is their business and damn sure not mine. BTW I have seen that happen and for the most part it worked out very well and they are still together. Yes there a few horror stories, of course there are, but I find them few and far between. Except for one American guy who was married and divorced from 6 local girls as each girl started hitting age 25. The Philippine government did ask him to leave the country and four of his ex-wives remained friends with our group and they all met and married western guys and are still together living all over the world..
My wife is 13 years younger than me only because I never asked her age when we met.
So the bitter old lady from Boston, whom albeit I don’t know, but I’d wager she has driven a few nice guys out her front door. I tried to explain to her, that it unwise to assume, or report fake news on the internet; there are other people who get paid to do that!
Great insight Paul. I will marry my Philippine Fiancee in November after 4 years of courting and living together. I’ve traveled the world over and have decided that the Philippines is for me. Like you, I grew up in an age when respect for one another and your elders was the norm. I still own and operate a business in the U.S. and will fully retire in 3 years. Like you, I don’t want for much and don’t want to ever be in that position. In the end, it isn’t where you are but rather who you are with which dictates happiness in the life.
Rod;
Congratulations on your upcoming marriage and the best to you and your bride. I told Tripack (Commenter on this article) how life will give you the answers, if we are smart enough to just listen. I’ve lead a very adventurous life as a seaman, and the pay was great. Three months a year vacation and the only thing I had in my name was a big storage locker in Florida. My dad called me the wealthiest homeless
Ha ha ha Paul 🙂
That woman in Boston just comforted me in my behaviour… I am racist… I don’t like white women… ^_^
Tripack;
For a couple of years I was married to a girl from North Carolina, after that I stayed single from age 24 till age 50, banked 60% of my money and my last loan was in 1978. I built a expensive house in Bataan using cash, and pay cash for anything I want. I owe that girl from N.C. quite a lot for the wonderful single life she gave me. (LOL)
Yeah… I also was wed with a european woman, back in my twenties… Wedding ended when I had a huge accident in the army and that I was stuck in a hospital bed for 2 years… By the way, we’re about to be neighbours ^^ I buy some land these days in Bataan, in Roosevelt 🙂
Tripack;
I dated a Danish lady in Europe, and 20 years later I met her daughter’s (No relation) best friend in my Night Club in Puerto Rico. It’s really a small world…
Roosevelt is a nice place to live; I’ve been comfortable here for 18 years.
Have you ever met an older retiree lady married to a young philippino man? I wonder why there are not many here who would see the benefits.
Don;
I knew a Pinay in her 60’s married to a sailor in his 40’s. I did scratch my head, but it was their life!
I doubt that I know that particular woman but I have met many of her ilk here in Boston. As for living in the Philippines I once wanted to but have concluded that I couldn’t stand being away from Boston, the city that I love. To each his own, I’m sure you will agree. It’s OK though, my Filipina wife (only 2 years younger than me) doesn’t want to go back. After a visit 5 years ago she concluded that the Philippines (Cebu City) that she left 32 years ago doesn’t exist any more.
Scott;
If you never met that woman, then we are both lucky men. Dorchester formed me and I was lucky to grow up there. But it had snow, and that was the deal killer for me. In my life I never met anyone from the tropics that retired in New England. But I understand with your wife from Cebu why you like it. If we all like the same thing, they’d only make one type of car.
Good morning Paul…Hope this finds you well…
Yep…our Island is our island…the one that suits us best…and politics in a foreign country…I feel that you are spot on…Not our right to get involved…Age?…Hmmm never asked as well…Happy is happy…Once I found out my wife’s age (before we go married) my only concern was…What would my mother (Deep south) think of this? I disclosed to Mom that my wife was a bit (quite a bit actually) younger than me…And you know what…Mom said “Son, are you happy?…Then don’t you worry about it…It’s nobody’s business but yours.” Gotta love our Mothers…Thanks for the article.
Best regards and enjoy your next SM Light…Cheers my Brother!
Ed
Justed;
I love Bataan, but I don’t get paid to advertise it, I’ve been to so many different areas of the Philippines I can see the attraction people have for them. (Well there is Manila!) My Yankee Mother was the same way, If Paul is happy…… I sometimes enjoy the San Mig Lite, but the SMB in the brown stubby painted label bottle is still my number one!
Nice article. Paul. In my case, people asked why I married an American, question usually coming from Filipinos.
Marcelino:
Marrying an American, as I said above if it is good for you, then that is all that matters. I had tried it and didn’t like it. BTW her next two husbands also tried it and didn’t like it, they were just proving my point. We all must live our own life, and be damn to anyone who would say you are wrong! The best to you! Does she live in the Philippines?
The phenomenon of older male foreigners, who partner with younger Filipinas here in the Phils. and who ave an ex-wife or two back home is almost a stereotype among Filipinos. When taxi drivers for example chat me up and learn that my spouse is a pinay, they assume that i fit the above pattern. But when I tell them that she’s my one and only and that we’ve been married for 46 years, they’re amazed. And I guess that there’s some validity to that typecast As it is, when I do see foreigner-Filipina couples on the street, it’s rare that they’re both elderly like my wife and me; it’s usually the older guy-younger guy combination. .
The phenomenon of older male foreigners, who partner with younger
Filipinas here in the Phils. and who ave an ex-wife or two back home is
almost a stereotype among Filipinos. When taxi drivers for example
chat me up and learn that my spouse is a pinay, they assume that i fit
the above pattern. But when I tell them that she’s my one and only and
that we’ve been married for 46 years, they’re amazed. And I guess that
there’s some validity to that typecast As it is, when I do see
foreigner-Filipina couples on the street, it’s rare that they’re both
elderly like my wife and me; it’s usually the older guy-younger gal
combination.
relevy;
A country where most guys have a side pot are judging us? 40 to 50% of the ship’s I sailed on were Filipino. Large families at home and every one was a millionaire for the day and would blow a weeks pay in one night with the ladies in ports we visit.
And they can’t believe you’ve been with one lady for over 50 years. Good for you is what I say.
I was just damn lucky to have found a good woman.
Welcome to the club, or maybe the ladies should have the club, called “Putting Up With The Old Farts Club”
Hi Paul, I’ve sure met a few women like the one from Boston. They seem to love organising other peoples lives instead of taking care of their own. Who the hell cares what they think, Lol. Be happy and live life for yourself 🙂
Chas;
I get to smile when I tell them I was single 80% of my life.
I have a story to tell. A few years ago while at a hospital in Kidapawan with my Filipina wife (I’m from New Zealand myself), there were a few young Filipino’s talking in a group and one young guy saw me and said something to the Filipina that was chatting with the group of people. She replied back to him and he then made a further reply to her in which people then laughed. Naturally the conversation was in the local dialect. Afterwards my wife told me in English what they had said.
This was the conversation : M: There’s a white man for you to marry. F: No he’s too old. M: That just means he will die sooner and you can get his money.
Kinda sums up the attitude of SOME Filipino’s towards white man. Thankfully not all are like that.
Ricardo;
I know of a sailor on one of my ships that made a deal like that, the girl was 20 years old and stunningly beautiful, plus a really sweet kid. The deal was for her to legally marry him, he’ll build her a huge house, buy a big van and her folks and siblings could live with them. She could finish her degree, and as a seaman his insurance would pay her a lump sum of $450,000.00 plus his retirement, $35,000.00 per year. And since she was a Philippine Citizen there would be no US Taxes. (That’s the part he liked the best). He was in his 60’s and lived a very happy life with her for ten more years, and passed at age 73. She and her family grew to really love him as he did treat them very well. It turned out very good for everyone. Life is funny that way.
That is a nice story.
Traveling the world I’ve seen some unusual, things, I learned to not judge unless it affects my life or family.