A few days ago Bob brought me to a place which I am not expecting to have kids that in need so badly. I am not going to mention the name of the place. They don’t want to be publicly known. I respected their wishes. I will just tell you about my thoughts and heartbreak. First when Bob mention to me about the place, I knew where it is but I thought it was not open because when the time I swing by there I felt that no one was inside the compound. I just thought it was one of those abandoned buildings here in the city. He said to me that he saw people and kids there, and he said hi to them. They did not respond to him, maybe, some people thinks here if its foreigner its almost always a pedophile. So after lunch he asked me if I would want to go with him there and we will bring some candies for the kids, he said maybe we could go inside since its me and him going there. I told him sure. So after we ate our lunch we then off to SM to buy some goodies for the kids. So we went to the place. This place really catered to the sick and malnourished kids here in town. When they get better the family can take them home.
The place is just 2 story simple house with high gated fence. We could hear the kids playing inside. When the lady opened the gate, she asked us who are we wanting to see there? I explained to her that we saw the sign they had outside, and we want to helped out a little bit and we want to see the kids. I felt she was happy to see us and she let us in right away with no hesitation. Before we went to see the kids we were asking how many kids do they have there? She told us that they had 32 kids ages 3-10, and 20 infants 3 months old to toddler right now. When we saw the kids, wow they were really wanting our attention, especially Bob’s attention. A lot of the kids really wanting Bob to carry them. They always had their arms up and asked Bob to carry(kugos) them. A lot of them say kugosa ko (carry me) please. Bob didn’t know what they were talking about. He asked me what the kids were talking to him about. I told him that they want him to carry them. One kid doesn’t want to let go of Bob. It was really hard watching those kids.
One kid really got me until now. I even cried over that kid. She’s 9 years old, but because she was so malnourished, just by looking at her, you would think she’s like 1-2 years old. It really hit me there. I was so heartbroken seeing her. I never saw somebody like that in person. Yes of course I saw like that on TV before, the kids in Africa. You know the big tummy and the arms and legs are so thin. That’s what happened to this girl I saw. Bob carried her, it was so hard looking at her. I can’t help it, in front of that girl I really cried. Didn’t really realized we had kids like that her in town. I should not have shown her that I cried, but its hard not to. She’s so weak and so thin. The in-charge told us that girl was brought there by the parents because they can’t take care of her and they had no means of feeding the girl. The in-charge continue on saying that when the girl arrived there she can’t stand up and can’t move, can’t smile. But now, she was there a few months already. When we saw her she was smiling with us. She can already raise her arms. But the girl still pale and still weak. I really hope and pray that she will continue on her recovery and get better.
We saw one baby there that had tummy problems, his 3 months old. He was crying a bit and when Bob pick him up he stop crying. He was a cute baby too. I saw one kid, she was 10 years old and had problems with her brain I think. She was abandoned by the parents, it was the neighbor that called up the organization and so they got the kid. They’re bringing that kid to the doctor and the hospital. Just by looking at her I think she won’t really be here for a long time. I’m just happy that the organization were helping her now and at least ease some pains that she’s feeling.
They also had some special kids there too. Good thing they were taking good care there. A lot of the kids are going to school. They had volunteers bringing kids to school. They had some helpers there that was paid by the organization. When we were there, those helpers some are washing clothes and others ironing clothes. It’s really nice seeing people do care.
We will go back there this weekend and bring our kids, nieces and nephew. We might volunteer there sometimes. I saw few volunteer people there. It was really nice seeing good people taking time to take care those kids. Hats off to the unending support of some doctors, volunteers and some people that donates to that organization. I am impressed with you guys generosity. I hope more people will do the same.
Mabuhay!
Feyma, I hear all the time about people from the USA adopting children from other countries because there aren’t enough children up for adoption at home. Do you know if Philippine law prevents these children from being adopted from people in other countries? If not, do you think there’s a way to increase awareness of these great kids who needs good homes? I feel confident that every single one of them could be adopted by loving US families (or from another country) and give them great homes.
Hi Cy – It’s not easy to adopt a kid in the Philippines. I’ve heard people trying to adopt here and end up giving up. Lots of running around with the systems though, and it cost so much.
Good to see you here. Take care!
Feyma,
It is always heart breaking for me to see kids that have no one to take care of them. So glad this place is willing and able to do that. It is amazing sometimes what we find if we look in our own “back yards.”
Hi Steve Maust – Tell me about it, it sure is a heartbreak. Seeing the in-charge, helpers and the volunteers it shows that they really care those kids. I am so thankful for that. True, its really good that we found the place. Something for us to think about during LIP giveaways.
Nice to see you here again. Take care!
Feyma. My Asawa and I were never blessed with children. Way in the back of my mind I have been toying with the idea of adopting a child upon our move to the Phil. In reference to Cy’s question. Is adoption easier if one of the parents is a Phil citizen and the other a legal resident. I would think we would get an older child. Anyway just the seed of a though right now. Feed Back?
Hi scott h – Honestly best for you to ask a lawyer. I just don’t want to give you not thorough information. I know for sure it’s so difficult to adopt a child here.
Thank you so much for stopping by!
Heart breaking indeed…
Hi Myra Casas – Truly
Hi Feyma,if we look around us the poverty is so bad here,i have kids everyday wanting rice or pesos.I also have many relatives in the mountains i attend to when i go there.Im only one person but i wish i was many to feed and cloth the kids .Its also a good feeling to me for them to give me fruits and share what they have.
Hi Maynard – Yes indeed. A lot of times seeing the poverty here, we are just wishing if we could have even just a fraction of the money of what Bill Gates have, that would be something. We could help a bunch of people here then. Just a thought guys…
You are right, it’s really a good feeling to share.
Good to see you here.
Take care!
All children black ,white brown,need food ,clothing and shelter,we see it everyday.I wish more people could help 🙂
Hi Maynard – Agree
hi Feyma
truly heartbreaking story…my wife and i would like to visit soon to see what we can do, can Bob email the address to me..thank you
Hi David L Smith – Yes truly a heartbreaking. I will email you privately the address.
Take care!
Yes, it is really very sad to see children living in abject poverty. The problems here in the Philippines is that the poor families just kept on having kids. These poor children did not asked to be born. Parents should be more responsible as to how many kids they are going to have. It is very irresponsible for parents to have many kids if they can’t provide these kids with food, clothing,shelter and education.
Thank you for the thumbs up guys!
Feyma,
When i go home for good i’m planning to adopt a child although ive’d go a lot of nieces and nephews , if i adopt any one of them ,i’m gonna have a big trouble coz of jealousy among them so i thought of adopting someone i can call mine, you see i’m not rich but i can provide him/her a roof to live and send him/her to school. In fact i once wrote to DSWD and make an enquiries on how to adopt a child or if i am eligible to adopt one and they gave me a nod. So far i haven’t pursue the issue yet coz i’m still working but once i retired i may give you a call or let you know. My heart goes to these children and hope they find a new home and a loving adopted parents in the future.
Hi rebecca – Good for you. Yeah, you did the right thing to contact the DSWD. They are the best people to give you advice too.
I would love to hear from you when you be retiring. Or maybe visit Davao too. You might like it here. 😉
Good luck to you.
As always I’m happy to see you here.
Take care!
Good to know there are many advocates against prejudice.
Hi Davao Business Directory – Thank you so much!
Great article Feyma- i am at work now will comment more later
Hi dave bennett – Thank you so much. Not a problem.
Hi Myra Casas for sure.
For those asking about adoption; I have a friend and his Pinay wife that spent a year and a half living here trying to legally adopt a niece, so they could take her to the US. After wrangling with the system, and the corrupt officials here , they ended up returning to the USA emptyhanded. I just wish 1% of the money that is handed out for every election went to the orphanages. They could eat like kings and queens.
Hi Dave Keiser – I felt sorry for your friend. I’ve heard some stories like that. As I said from my other comments IT IS HARD TO ADOPT HERE. The run around is endless. Needs to have lots of patience and the money.
Thank you for your input here.
Take care!
Hi Violante Piamonte Turner – I know what you mean. Our people here really needs a lot of good educations about responsible parenting. Trend here young ones having babies. Sad to see everyday.
I TRIED TO READ UR ARTICLE BUT I CAN’T OPEN IT. I GET A BLANK PAGE
Really? Try to go to http://www.liveinthephilippines.com and click my name there. Let me know if it still not working for you.
Its so hard for people to adopt there. Many give up. I have a friend who goes there and brings medical equipment people donate and a doctor goes too. He was telling me he was going to adopt a child it was just too expensive and takes 2-3 years, his heart was broken. The child lives with his wifes relative now somehow she got permission not sure the whole story. I realize there horror stories with adoptions sometimes but with the amount of kids needing good homes and love its worth the risk. I live in a small town in Vermont and I know personally 3 chinese girls who were adopted from people I go to church with.
Hi Brian – I know and heard that its hard to adopt here. I hope that the law will change for the better for adoption here. I mean we would not want a pedophile get an easy access here.
Maybe it’s easier to adopt in China than here.
Anyway, thank you for sharing your thought.
Take care!
What I don’t understand is that why they don’t want to be publicly known when they can benefit from being publicized. People will know about their cause and eventually will support them —financially or anything, so that these kids can be helped in any way. If I only know who they are, then I could send a little money to help them in their finances for providing the needs of the kids…but the thing is I don’t know what is the name of their place and worse, they don’t want people to know them. It’s odd , di ba? But correct me if I’m wrong.
hi bingkaycoy
My wife and i are also baffled with this secrecy and not wanting to disclose the address where the kids live. We live in Davao so would certainly try to help them, maybe Feyma can explain the secrecy.
I would not push the issue of “why” they do not wish to generate a lot of out in the open publicity. It may be as simple as they are not currently in compliance with some government requirement or letting everyone know where they are located would bring a bunch of pedophiles out from under their rocks to try various schemes to take control of some young vulnerable child.
Hi bingkaycoy – The first thing I told them that we wanted to help. We know lots of people in the internet. We took photos. The head person saw that we are taking photos, she then told us that we can have photos just for us not to be used at anything. She then continue telling us that they don’t want to ask help. If people wants to help its okay but they don’t want to ask. We respected their wishes, we want that we are in good terms with them. We already loved the kids there. Even my kids, they want to go there whenever they are free. They already hook to the kids there. They were really playing with the kids there. They had some businesses that supports them. They also helped out to the flood victims of Davao City. When we went there last weekend the helpers there were cooking lots of food to feed the people in the evacuation center. I was impressed with them on that too.
The organization was run by a nun. It’s the policy of the organization not to ask for help. They will accept help but they don’t want to ask. It’s their policy and I’m going to respect that. We go there and brought some goodies.
Hi Rich321 ( Rich Bowen) – To be honest I was shocked at first why they don’t want to be publicly known. But when the head nun explained and when I saw at the founder I understand. I am not going to jeopardized our freedom to go there anytime we want to see and help the kids. Me and my family will follow their wishes. We will bring our friends there if they want to see the place. Not a problem.
Thank you Rich for understanding.
Take care!
In Australia, sex education is an open book. Parents should advice their children regarding birth controls as soon as they started dating. We can’t stop our children from having sex. It would be naive of us to think that they wont do it. That is the reason why here in the Philippines we have so many young unwed mothers. Young women who aren’t supposed to have children because they are not responsible to be a parent. Also, another problem here is that the Catholic church interferes too much in the political issues here.
It also happens in the U.S. children having children before they can even finish puberty. My cousin gave birth @ age 13. I consider her a victim more than a wrong doer. Many r to blame for this to happen world wide. Severe punishment should be put on those who want to play but don’t wanna pay. China only allows 1 kid pr married couple. Nothing wrong with big families. But ur right. Have enough spoons to equal number of mouths to feed etc.
Hi feyma i tell my freinds at work of the poverty that i saw when i was there ,i dont think that the beleive me ,to see children in that state must be heart breaking ,i was cast out when i was born as i am an adopted child i was lucky that a couple who couldnt have children gave me a fantastic life not rich and not poor but heaps of love and they worked hard to keep foood on the table and a roof over my head ,i look back on this as now i care for my elderly mother as my father passed 2 years ago and this is my duty now ,things in my life are not great at the moment as you know but i consider myself lucky and cant imagine how any one of these childre must feel nowing that they have no one apart from these amazing people who look after them maybe lip can rally to raise some funds to help these children and the kind souls that give there time and effort to try to give them a normal life
chris
Hi chris – Thank you for sharing your life story. Hats off to you for taking good care of your elderly parents.
Yes something to think about on our LIP drive.
Thank you for stopping by here.
Take care!
http://adopt.com/philippines/index.html
Hi ian – Thanks for the link.
Hi Femay – Nice story but all too common here in the Philippines. Like other readers I’m also surprised by the secrecy of this particular group and their reluctance to reveal their cause. I’m also surprised that the DSW allows so many children to live knowingly in such conditions as they normally monitor this type of facility and insist on a full time Social Welfare Officer to be present per each 30 children.
As you and many readers know Marilou and myself have been involved for many years in helping a local children’s home here in Talakag and it’s only by continually writing about and seeking help have we been able to help in our own small way.
For those interested in our particular children’s home Bethany Christian Home for Children Inc, I have provided a link: http://bethanytalakag.blogspot.com/
With regards to adopting children from a bona-fide organisation here in the Philippines yes its possible as over the years 50+ Bethany has found homes for many, many children in that time and continue to do so.
Good luck in raising awareness for this particular facility.
Regards.
Jim.
Hi Jim – The Bethany foundation really is close to my heart. It was really an honor meeting the founder before she passes away. I remember our son AJ, when we went there he wanted to take like 2 kids home. Really all of us wanting to take the kids home. I remember also that the kids gave their savings for the money for the poor there. See our kids will give everyday from their allowance towards the money for the poor. During December time they will open the piggy bank and buy something for the poor. That year Bethany was the recipient. I’m happy that they did gave it there.
Anyway, we took lots of pictures there. We really want to go there again. Hopefully soon. All the kids wants to go there too. You had a good foundation there in Talakag Jim. You and Marilou keep up the good works too.
Take care!
Hi Feyma – You know you and Bob and the kids will always be welcome to visit Bethany.
Hopefully you can make it here in the not too distant future.
Regards from.
Jim & Marilou.
Hi Jim – Thank you so much… Will let you know when we’re heading to that area.
Have a great day. Hi to Marilou.
Take care!
Reading about this or seeing it with my own eyes every time I am in the Philippines makes me really depressed.
Even if I gave everything I have or will ever have it will be like a drop in an ocean. It is nice that many people try to help as much as humanly possible, but I am afraid that this issue will not get resolved anytime soon.
People are having kids even though they cannot afford them. In western countries the birth rate is down because people have no more children that they can afford to support.
Unless education of people wont improve and interference of church (birth control) will diminish this problem is here to stay…
Hi Marcel – I know what you are saying. The government needs to do something about educating the people. Hopefully, pretty soon it will turn around for the better. I hope anyway. For now we are crossing our fingers.
Nice to see you here.
Take care!
Bob, I think it’s time to have your Donate button handy. I’ll be the first to use it.,,,,,JC
Hi JC – Something to think about. Thank you for the idea.
Take care!
Feyma,
Good article. So heartwarming to here all the wonderful things you Bob and the kids do for those children. Your family truly are angels for what you do for so many children. Be safe, have a nice day.
Thank you so much Papa Duck…
Take care!
hi feyma .it break my heart to see such beautiful children with no loving parents .my wife eleanor and myself are wanting to adopt a beautiful little girl in the philipines .we have one son only and would like have a daughter. my wife is from becol camarine sur. can you advice me on best why to adopt a child from orphanage. god bless.geoffrey fletcher
Geoffrey- I think it is a wonderful thing to adopt a child [ i’m in the process of doing it right now! ] but please remember that even children who are NOT beautiful need to be cared for.
If you do adopt i hope you wont base your choice on looks.
Hi geoffrey fletcher – True. Luckily they had those nuns and volunteers and the helpers there to take care of these needy kids. But I know lots of kids here too that just begging. Really hard seeing them. It’s really a heartbreak.
I think you should ask DSWD people whats the best way for you to adopt here in the Philippines.
Take care!
it breaks my heart to see gods children with no loving parents.that many families would love to adopt those loving children
Hi Ms. Feyma, several months to go and it will be holiday season, more goodies to buy and share.. and more smiles to bring to the eyes of every child.. even if it’s just for little while.
Hi sugar – Yes, that’s one of the place to take in mind now for our LIP Drive. Can’t wait to give goodies to the kids there.
Take care!
Like too many people I suppose my first encounter with the Philippines was in Angeles City. I soon ventured away from there but my girlfriend was always wanting me to give coins to the kids. I was happy to do that but what I saw was these kids running around to the nearest ‘coin game’. Sometimes we call these odds and evens, heads and tails and so on. They were gambling with the money. They were starving, you could see that but all they were interested in was gambling. They would ay that they wanted to make more money so they could buy more rice for their family. That’s the eternal draw for every gambler. My girlfriend and I started to give small packets of rice out instead. I was happy with this because that way they would be getting food right?? No, I was wrong. They were selling the packets of rice and then off to the game again. So we cooked the rice and made some of those small packets of the soya sauce with chillies and vinegar. Small enough just to be a quick snack really, about 1 big handful of cooked rice in each bag. We made the kids eat the rice where we were. That worked. I had the idea of asking around and getting expats to give just their small change to help buy rice and stuff to feed some of the kids that lived on the street. I got a rude awakening. “Be careful” I was told. “The police could cause you trouble by accusing you of pedophile stuff”. “What” I said, “I’m trying to help”. Once they know you are spending money on the kids they will try to con you out of money, I was told. Then there are those who will offer to help you and they might be pedophiles. Because you are organizing it the police will blame you. Oh boy, I do not need that I thought. Then there were stories of guys that had organized things like this. A central place where they cooked very simple food, mainly rice that was available at lunchtime only. Started with just a few kids but soon they got overwhelmed. They saw parents drop their children off by the side of the road to go in to get their free meal. The system got totally abused and the guys had to stop it. They could not go through the process of deciding who was legit and who was not and they certainly couldn’t afford to feed anybody that turned up. The sentiment was right, the action that these guys did was right but they still had to stop just as I stopped.
It’s nice to hear of the place you mentioned. Not nice that it is needed of course. It takes a hell of a commitment to set something like that up and you know your emotions are going to be ripped apart with what you see. I take my hat off to these people. I like to help and would certainly volunteer if there was something close to here. Yes it takes money but surprisingly little. What it really takes is your time and commitment. I encourage anybody to get involved if you can in a properly organized venture so that you are a little protected. It is true what they say, you get back a lot more than you put in.
Have a good one
Cemlyn