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An Ole Friend has departed

Transportation / by

The taillights were flickering into the dusk, as our New Ole Honda departs its mountain home for the last time, a tear wells up in my family’s eye, and then we all turn to the New-new Mitsubishi and we smile. New cars sure smell so good.

The pre-sold deal fell through, but we all knew that would happen. So now I’ve put up with one full week of car buyers (Lookers and dreamers) knock-knocking on our gate, wanting to peruse the old girl in the carport like she was a prize horse at the 4-H club. Lookie-loos each and everyone, without a centavo to their name but with each with Champagne dreams of free money falling from the mango tree. Each wanting a commission for each referral they send to me. People whom have seldom rode in a car and have never driven one. The only thing worse than selling a car is opening a Sari-sari store for being constantly bothered. It got so bad I moved the Honda to my brother-in-laws house up the street from me.

The car was up for sale for 8 days without it ever being advertised, as I thought my son-in-law was going to handle it. That didn’t happen (Not his fault). One real buy and sell guy came to the house and inspected the car, tapping the bodywork to find where the Bondo was. He missed it every time, Hell if he read lip he would have known where every dent was from the pictures I’ve posted. I felt so embarrassed for him I showed him where the dents were as I was tired of him knock-knocking all over the Honda. The fact that the engine had a total rebuild last year held no value to him as he tore down my car finding nothing but fault. Until I said; “Sir; if the Honda is such a piece of crap, how can you, with a clear conscience, consider selling it to someone else?” He smiled! But he did ask if my car was flooded last year when Olongapo went under. I said; “Do you remember the flood got to be 800 feet deep and the ark sailed by but everyone was already dead?” He didn’t remember that at all, so I told him look down, at Olongapo, and asked if he really thinks my car flooded? What a dolt!

So after making me the most insulting offer on the car I told him; “Son, you are wasting my time.” I explained that if he would look at my house and realize that one I didn’t have a pressing need for his money so that his tactics were falling on deaf ears. I wasn’t hungry and he had no food that I wanted. He drooled on. After a while we agreed on a price fair to both of us and shook hands. He said he’d return in the morning and take her home with him.

Remember we shook hands? 09:00 he called me and offered PNP 20,000.00 less. Without a word I disconnected as I refuse to speak with a man of no honor (We had shook hands). He called Mayang and told her we were disconnected. No Ping (Hey I don’t name these kids) Paul hung up. Don’t you miss the forceful hang-up’s you could do with the old land line cradle phones?

I told Mayang I would burn the car in the empty lot, before I sold it to him even if he doubled the price. I might have overstated that point a bit. But he was dead to me. But Mayang continued talking to him, and she had four customers looking at the car when he called and offered the original price. And then he didn’t show up. (Second strike)

I moved the Honda up to my brother-in-laws yard as I’d said to also make room for the New-new Mitsubishi in the carport. We went to town the following day at 0900, 15 minutes later Ping the buy & sell guy shows up to my house and waited there until we got home at 14:30 (We had a nice lunch at the California Café in the Harbor Point Mall. Mayang’s cell phone had shut itself off, and mine was on my dresser in the bedroom.

Ping had the agreed upon amount with him and I walked by him to the house without a word. Mayang and he finished the deal and she brought me the paperworks to sign. On the bottom of the sales contract I added, “SOLD AS IS, NO WARRENTY IMPLIED” he wanted to know what that meant and Mayang told him I copied it off the last buy & sell contract I had. He understood and drove away.

The Mitsubishi G4 GLX (Mayang’s new car) goes to church on Sunday, and I too have to go! They are going to have the priest sprinkle water on the car (That will leave spots) and bless it. I’ll assume it was like when we took “Lil Dude” there for his christening. I don’t argue or question, I snap to with a proper hand salute and shout; Aye-Aye, My Mahal! Life is so much easier that way. Oh, getting your car blessed dose not cancel the need to buy auto insurance.

Now on the streets of Olongapo you can hear the cry of: “Hey Joe; Wanna’ buy a car?” With Ping parked with a for sale sign on the New Ole Honda asking PNP 100,000.00 more than he offered me. I should park behind him and tell the new customer all the things that he found wrong with the car just one week ago.

The downside of a new car is that it’s boring as far as something to write about. But have no fear, I still live in Dinalupihan Bataan, something will come up to write about…

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Comments

  1. My dad spent much of his career selling cars and trucks. The one thing he greatly disliked were the tactics of so many people in that business. Many would sell their own mother if there was a profit in it! 🙂

    • Tom;
      When I sold cars in Florida while waiting to be hired as a Merchant Marine, I discovered that I was the only non-felon on the lot, even my sales manager had done hard time. It wasn’t always that way; it was once an honorable profession. And I’ll assume your father was of the honest type. The real bamboozler is the closer, who comes in after the salesman to finish the deal and sell you all the crap you don’t need like undercoating. (Rusty Jones will do the same job at 1/3 the price and guaranteed forever). Or the extended warrantee on engine and drive train, for what you pay for that, you could replace the engine yourself. Today it is sheer corporate greed pushing the auto industry, not the good guys like your dad.

      • Paul,
        I remember when the era of “Closers” and “Valuers” started here, it was around the time I got out of the game.
        I was taught old school, closed my own deals, did my own valuations and often my own write downs.
        No way was I going to be just an order taker running to a Sales Manager like a schoolboy to get a deal sanctioned or for a Closer to close a deal.
        No way Jose, I’m outta here 🙂

  2. Read the whole thing. You did it your way with Mayang, and that what matters. Congratulations, it does smells good, I can smell it here in Las Vegas

    • Raymundo;
      I learned years ago if I want good things in my life I had better just shut up and listen to my wife Mayang. She earned my respect (Obama can’t spell it but I can) many years ago when we were dating, she has a built in “BS” detector that has never failed us. She took charge during the building of our house and she canvassed for the lowest cost materials available and never let the engineer purchase anything, so nothing but the best materials were used in the building of “HER” house. So why not cars too?
      They really do smell great don’t they!

  3. Paul, Dinalupihan is so small, you might have seen my son’s girlfriend walking around. Heck, you might’ve even met her. Her name is Jeramie. 🙂

    Seriously, though, I hate people who putz around when they act like they want to buy your car. I’d rather take a loss at a dealership than deal with them.

    • RT’
      No I’ve never met Jeranpe here in Dinaloop (Nick Name) but you are right about the size of the town, the entering and leaving sign are on the same post.
      The dealerships will only take your car in trade if it is less than nine years old. So 1996 Honda’s are exempted from rule number one.

  6. As always, you posts bring a big smile on my face…A good way to start a Monday.
    I can see that selling a car is not that easy, so when that time will come, i will let others do the job, for a provision of course. My temper and blood pressure would raise to much, if i should cope with people like you describe.¨
    When i look at adds for used cars, there’s always a word that pops up: “Price Negotiable”… I guess that means half the price or less 😀
    Maybe the handshake doesn’t mean the same here? I know what it means and take it seriously, but maybe this is different here. For me it is absolute confirming and a promise not to break. As a matter of fact I take it even more serious than written words, coz that’s a deal between guys (never seen the woman do that).
    Anyway – thanks for a Monday morning smile and laughter.

    • Alex’
      The hand shake means something to many, and nothing to the few. I feel embarrassed for the few.
      The Ad’s are funny; I figured out that I should have asked PNP 500, 00.00 for the Honda and then settle on the real price. But I put a fair price on it with 50,000.00 so they could talk me down, but they want the one half price, so it was my fault for doing it my way and not their way.

  7. Actually kinda sounds like the tactics of selling a used car are internationally about the same as here in US, the buyer seems to always try and find a way to get a big discount just as they are about to hand over the money, of the the previously agreed upon price from the day before negotiations. In my preparations for moving to the Philippines by the year 2018, I am also trying to sell some cars and heavy equipment currently, and what a pain in the ass it is. Two of mine are performance cars, and I get some of the most stupid questions I have ever heard.

    I saw a lot of cars there that are available with diesel engines, that are not available here. Dont know if diesel was available on a G4 or not, but what is your Paul, gas or diesel.

    • Bill;
      The G4 is only gas, but many cars are diesel my buddy has two new Chevys both the pickup and the SYV and he loves the diesel engines they come with.
      But stupid questions are universal, but here the guy talking has never driven a car so the questions are dumber than normal. They all want to be the middle man between you and the buyer. I dismissed them off hand as they have absolutely no money in their pocket. At least in the states they drive up in something to look at your cars and not on a Trickle. (The Trickle driver will then come back and ask for a commission because he brought the customer to your house, I’m not making that up, it happened)

    • Randy;
      That is so true if we both live long enough because this is my last; the Honda made it to 18 years and beyond the New-New Mitsubishi will be just starting its journey.

  10. With my last car, a 1999 Ford Escort, the engine blew from a head gasket leak at 177,000 miles. It was towed to the local mechanics garage that always did the service on it for me. I figured anything else I did with that car would end up costing me money so I just signed it over to the mechanic for One Dollar.

    I wish you many happy adventures with your new car Paul.

    I still wonder if a Heater with Defroster comes with the car or is available as an option.

    • Bob (NY)
      A smart man knows when to cut his losses and just step away. You did the right thing,
      The heater defroster question I’ve been asked before and I’ve forgotten every time to check. They are clearly marked on the air con panel. I promise I will check to day and sneak the answer in later today! Unless I forget again.

  12. Paul,
    It used to be a handshake meant something. Times have changed like with a lot of things. It was good that Mayang handled the transaction and got the car sold and you didn’t have to deal with him again.

    • Randy;
      Mayang just wanted the car to be gone; I just wanted the kid gone sale or no sale. Clearer heads won the day; I took a nap with my dog.

  16. Hi Paul,, Dinalupihan ,, Don’t faint but I can now pronounce it ,, I could spell it before I could say it ,, believe me it took a long time to get my tongue around it,,, :-),, If its that small I may bump into you when I’m there ,, well not actually there , San Benito, ,,, not sure when because at the moment its in the hands of the passport gods ,, fingers crossed ,,,, by the way, great article , always makes me smile ,,,

    • Russell;
      San Benito, that’s a charming little Barangay nestled amongst the rice fields, I was there last year for their festival. It is a 12 to 15 minutes drive from my house in Roosevelt. The Filipino knows what I’m talking about when I say; “I’m from Dinaloop” but I can now easily say Dinalupihan but, 20 years ago; no damn way! (LOL)

    • Jonathan;
      There are many things I’ll miss about the New Ole Honda, and my wife thanks God that the carport is only big enough for one car or I wouldn’t have sold it.

  18. Paul , some pinoys treat the handshake only as a form of greeting they don’t consider it as a bond of honor like westerners do.

    You should have given him a dose of his own medicine by increasing your price by 10K when he haggled 20K less on what you shook hands for. Your ole new Honda still looked really nice that its resell value would never go south of 100K.

    Anyway, great new ride,. Enjoy your new new Mitsubishi! – Al

    • Al;
      You’re right I should have jacked the price up, but he has sold the New Ole Honda to someone new, as I saw it drive by in Olongapo two days ago. I wonder if Ping took a bath when he sold it. (LOL)

  19. I will miss the ole new honda as much as you since it was the source of many head nods, smiles and outright Laughter. Was a pure pleasure having lunch and adult beverages with you last week but when I got home Friday morning I had new new computer issues, Read crashed Op sytem, and just got it back a short while ago. That’s a story by itself but first I need to write one on my site about our trip to Subic Bay! Had a glorius time there during my seven day stay. So glad I brought my own Candy since we were literally staying at the Candy store and temptations were great. In the end though My Candy is as good and sweet as it gets. As for the new Mitsubishi, I am sure she is going to love it ( if she can get Lil Dude to let her use it ) as she is the Ideal designated driver! keep up the good reads my friend!

    • Hi Hey Joe;
      Yes it was a most enjoyable visit by you and Susan, I’m sorry we only got together that one day, but you can read what went down next week here on Lip. Sorry to hear about your computer trouble, but it will work out.

  20. Paul, I had a good laugh at your dealings with the buyer boy, what a load of amateurs, lol.

    I’m sad to say times have changed here though.
    During my days the handshake sealed the deal, even if you had second thoughts you never backed out. You staked your reputation on that handshake, duck out and word would get around quickly, no one in the trade network would ever deal with you again.

  21. Chas;
    You are so right, the handshake to me is still king, your word is your bond and all that. It might sound hokey to some but as you so apply said; “Second thoughts be damned you’ve made a deal”.

      • LOL Lots of shoulda coulda woulda on the part of Der Fuehrer in this “secret tape”. In truth, this tape was made by the Nazis during the closing days of the war intended to mislead the Allies as to the real reason why Der Fuehrer didn’t want to get rid of his Volkswagen, or move his headquarters to Samar, despite the urgings of the Oberkomando Wehrmacht headed by Reichmarschall Randy. The Volkswagen and the autobahn were Der Fuehrer’s true gifts to the German people. He was quite happy with his Volkswagen. Moving to Samar would be a tactical disaster. Indeed, the planted tape was found by the Russians in the Berlin bunker where Der Fuhrer was alleged to have committed suicide, and was quickly couriered back to Moscow for posterity. This is the tape we are watching today.

        Here are the strategic reasons behind Der Fuehrer’s rejection of trading in the Volkswagen and moving his headquarters to Samar. Number one – the Volkswagen is the embodiment of der Vaterland. How can anyone disrespect the Volkswagen? Number two – Der Fuehrer didn’t want to move his headquarters to Samar because of its proximity to the sea. Regardless of the millions of coconut trees found thereon, Samar would leave him vulnerable to an invasion from the sea, and the Allies were planning just that. At a time when General Paulus and his Sixth Army was taking a serious beating in Stalingrad, Der Fuehrer is shown in the tape beginning to lose his sanity, perhaps because of a high consumption of Weihenstephaner Hefeweissbier, or over the death of his half-neice, Geli Raubal, whom he really loved more than Eva Braun, no one really knows.

        Der Fuehrer’s Operation Barbarossa to conquer Russia turned out to be a failure. With the Allies preparing to hit the Normandy beaches and the Russians advancing from the East, Der Fuehrer saw the beginning of the end. He chose instead to remain at his Eagle’s nest on the mountains of Berchtesgaden, I mean, Dinalupihan, where the geography would provide a natural defense against an invasion from the sea, yet still be able to visit Texas Joe’s in Subic in the future when the war is over, if only Wehrner von Braun and his scientists and engineers at Peenemunde had just a little bit more time to turn the tides of the war. It was not meant to be. 🙂