Live in the Philippines

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I Should Be Immune to it by Now

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There are times when I reflect back to my Catholic School training and Catechism Class, Sister Mary Parvel told up about this guy in the Bible named “Job” and the crap that befell him, and yet he never wavered as he stuck to the plan and all ended up well. Or as well as it got back then.

Hey it was 60 years ago when she told me that, so I’m paraphrasing her story.

But over the few years I’ve been writing for LiP I feel that the story of “Job” was a parallel to mine here in the Philippines. They are constantly trying to sway my faith, testing me, or if Bob would let me say it; “They are ______ (Messing) with me.”Next question we could ask is, who the hell are “THEY” is it one person or collectively a hidden cabal that is out to get me? Remember even paranoids can have real enemies (Could the NSA be the one to be the one?)

What am I doing wrong, have I offended a hoard of Dewende’s, some minor Demigods, or whomever? I am ready to dash up to the roof patio to stand in the thunder and lightning rain and hold my hands on high and shout; “Al Gore: Why hast thou forsaken me?”

As your hand moves slowly up to your head for a major, major power head scratch, wondering if Paul has well and truly lost it this time.

My accursed Globe Dongle, that on again off again scourge or bane of my otherwise idealistic Philippine life. Throw the typhoons at me, I’ll smile and just shake my fist. Plague me with money requests from my wife’s relatives, but that’s like water off a ducks backside. I can handle it. I’ve been tested, and I can only hope I’ve been proved worthy over the last 20 years.

It’s 5AM; do you know where your internet is? For over two weeks the internet connections just shuts down at 5 am Not 4:59 or 5:01 5Am on the dot, set your Rolex or Timex by it, it is going to happen just as sure as my wife will ask me; “Do you want a cup of coffee, Honey ko?” A question to which I’ve never responded in the negative, it’s is going to happen as sure as I’ll have a beer this afternoon.

I have normally awoke early for most of my life, shipboard life will train you to do that, what could be better than a cup of coffee on main deck watching the sun come up in whatever sea or ocean you are on that day.

Besides my father told me when I was younger that is just something old people do. They get up early.

4AM on Facebook, and my Canadian Friend will ask why I’m up so early, forgetting that he also lives in the same time zone in the Philippines as I do. I’m sorry John I had to mention that (LOL).

But it is the right time to chat with my friends and family in the Boston area of space ship earth. I’m not going to ask Globe for a solution as the Navy taught me to never attempt to urinate up a ship’s mooring line. I already know that Sun and Smart both have a weaker signal in my neck of the woods. There is no cure or solution. But sometimes I just want to rant or vent. And I know LiP readers are tough and can handle it, or ignore it more than likely. Whereas my grandson would just give me an odd look, my wife would walk away asking if I wanted another cup of coffee, and my daughter would have her feelings hurt. (She’s sensitive that way)

I carried the offending dongle to the Globe Office in town, it was poked and prodded and deems a fully functioning dongle. I accepted that, and watched them blanch when I asked for a key to their office since it seems that is the only place that it works. I didn’t get the key. But I have one more plan. I will transfer what I need from my main computer to my android every morning then walk to the end of the road and flag down a Victory Liner with free Wi-Fi, ride it until I’ve sent and received what I needed to and get off and then catch the next one coming home. One of the many things about the Philippines that I love is that if you think about it for a minute or two, there is always another option.

Wow I do feel better now, thank you all for your help. See ya next week (Maybe) and forgive me my trespasses… as I forgive Globe, who hast trespassed against me.

Reader Interactions

Comments

  1. Dear Lip Readers;
    In the interest of fairness I must report that over the weekend my Daughter took the dongle to the Globe Office in Olongapo, where they reformatted or formatted (Whichever is correct) and there has been a slight improvement in my internet interwebby connection. Since I’m able to post this that is proof that it is better than nothing.

  2. I must say Paul, that it is about the same on the southern end of the Philippine Islands. I use mart but only during the hours from 2 am til 8 am. The remainder of the day it just don’t work even though there is plenty of signal. Like you, the shipboard life has made me an early riser and before I do anything else , I put on a pot of coffee. I Like mine Brewed, Black and sweet so everyone else in the house drinks the local San Mig 3 in 1 instant coffee. The coffee will hold my attention long enough to do the Internet Thingy without boiling my blood and Smart’s G A S attitude, At least as long as my dongle is working. I have come to the conclusion that if the internet is an essential life support system for your existence the the Philippines is not for you and so I try to find other life calming adventures during the day. The funny thing is that almost all of those involve the sea in some way! My heart still pumps salt water!

    • Joe;
      As we used to say in the Merchant Marines; “I’ve passed more saltwater through my bladder then most people have sailed on.” But watching the sun come up with a cup of hot coffee is as good as watching it set with a cold beer. I’ll fight on against my dongle, tilting my lance towards windmills with my trusty companion Sancho Panza at my side. Good luck with your interwebby and remember the Wi-Fi on the bus encase of emergencies.

  3. Hi Paul – Have you seen the movie Bruce Almighty. Better words according to Bruce might be “Smite me oh mighty smiter”

    • Thanks for posting that John, it could be just what Paul needs. The only time I use a Dongle or a cell phone myself is when I vacation in The Philippines and where I go signals are not a problem. Your link is the first I have heard of cell phone repeaters for individual use and I am glad to now know about them for future reference. I have owned and operated VHF and UHF repeaters but this is the first I have heard about them for Cell Phones.

      • You can also buy LTE routers (as suggested by Bob’s article) that use a directional antenna IF you have LTE service relatively close to your location (but not strong enough to receive on your phone or dongle). This will allow you have your whole household on a wifi connection that shares the signal. Be sure though, to get an antenna array that’s compatible with your provider (Globe was 900/2100 Mhz for 3G and 1800 Mhz for LTE – if I recall correctly)

        I spend a lot of undue time stressing out over the unreliability of our cable internet provider in our new rental in Tagaytay, because I MUST have internet to do my consulting / development work. Our cable connection was supposed to give us 5 Mbs, but most often – during the day at least – it’s under 1 Mbs.

        Quite by accident, I happened to plug my iPhone into my MacBook’s USB socket to charge it and found that it had paired to my machine, sharing it’s LTE connection via the “tethering function” (I was in Manila at the time). Out of curiosity, I ran Speedtest.net and found that I was getting > 10 Mbs right there in the cafe!

        When I went home to see what I’d get with our “lousy three bars of 3G” I was shocked to see that I was getting 5-6 Mbs throughout the day! This was during a time right after Glenda when our cable had been hopelessly out of commission for 3 weeks and I was SAVED by this – finally able to return to our home after staying with in-laws in Pampanga after the storm. While I’ve researched the repeaters, I haven’t purchased on – frankly because my bandwidth and signal strength without it are “OK”.

        Good luck guys!

  5. The Philippines has worked hard to earn the title of worst internet service in Asia, it’s easy to see they are striving to retain the title.

    • I don’t know, Tony…. I would wager that I am getting faster internet than 75% of all Americans, and I live in the Philippines. And, I am paying less than $25 per month for it.

      • Bob;
        It could be that you live within a large urban area unlike us out in Tooley Junction. The people in Olongapo have great high speed internet, but 6 miles outside the city, you are on your own. So each will have to judge the service provided to their own situation.

        • Yes, I understand that. I was really replying to Tony, because he said that the entire country internet service is terrible. But, there are parts of the country that have great internet. Unfortunately, that is not where you live, which I understand, but that is not what I was commenting about. Sorry for any confusion.

          • Bob;
            Ah it is clear to me now, I had misunderstood. Because every morning I play internet roulette, and hope the ball lands on the correct number. If I moved to the city it would improve but I’ll tough it out on my mountain with what I get from my friends at Globe.

      • Looks like you have yourself a real bargain there Bob. I am paying $50 USD for broadband cable internet and my average speeds ate 10 to 15 down ( depending where I am bouncing the signal from and other internet conditions ) and about 5 Up.

        What I have is enough for me. I think I could get higher speeds if I pay more but for what I do it is satisfactory. I can tell if my internet is ” normal ” or not in the amount of time it takes for web pages to flip on sites I use all the time. A nearby one comes up before I can take my finger off the clicker LOL that one is my primary gauge for is my internet working normally or not. LOL

        • Hi Tony – Yeah, I am familiar with that survey. Overall, the internet here is terrible. But, if a person wants good internet it is available, unless you are in an area where there is no coverage. One thing I recommend is that if Internet is important to you, choose where to live based on what type of Internet is available. It is important enough to me that I always do that when choosing a place to move to.

  6. You know, Paul, it might just be a case of making bad choices. Next time a decision looms, make your choice and then do the opposite. Results can’t be any worse, Dwendes aside. 😆

  7. Paul;
    My number one bad choice was to buy the only dongle that had a signal within my area. Using that logic I should have bough the Smart plan and had no internet, instead of poor internet. I do buy the right beer, so things are looking up..

  8. Paul,
    It took us over 2 weeks to get our internet back after the typhoon. Our friends in the same subdivision still don’t have there internet back yet. Customer Service at Smart has no clue what’s going on. Smart LTE is only in 1 Barangay here in Lipa. Globe advertises LTE in there store, but its not even in Lipa period and they have no idea when it will come. Why they advertise it, who knows. We just have to be happy with what we have.

    • Randy;
      I’ve been getting hit with the ads for over ten years from the three big providers, and it only applies to selected areas that are all ready saturated with great coverage. It’s the same as building six Vulcanizing Shops side by side. Cover where you know where the traffic is because the first shop succeeded there.

  10. Hi Paul,

    The part about you loosing your internet at exactly 5 AM may indicate it is not necessarily a problem of not enough signal. It could be that Globe or wherever you are getting your signal from such as the nearest cell phone tower, is changing to alternate equipment at that time every day. It could also be something that is happening between you and wherever you get your signal from at 5 AM. Something else could be generating a signal that interferes with your signal. How long does your outage last ? Try to think of what may be happening at exactly 5 AM that could cause a disturbance to your internet signal. The weaker the signal is at your house the easier it would be for something to interfere with it. In that case the repeater mentioned in one of the other comments might be just the thing.

    I like your choice of pics. Once again you have amused my Monday with them. Your ” other Option ” sounds good too !

    Good Luck Paul, If you ever find out what is happening I hope you will let us know. I think the thing about exactly 5 O’clock may be a key to the answer.

    • Bob New York;
      It lasts until the following day. Sometimes it comes back but for the most part it won’t. I also like plan B, the snacks are great on the bus.
      But I’ll plug along cold beer in hand, oh you can buy a beer on the bus too.

  11. Hi Paul,

    Yeah, I do miss you occasionally at 4AM! 🙂 I have the same problem as you sailors as my shift on the lighthouse (to keep you guys on course) used to start at 3AM! Another solution to try is to attach your dongle to an extension USB cable and then to your computer. This will give you room to position it differently so it will pick up the signal better. I used to use a three foot USB extension.
    Another solution is to invite more customers (i.e. foreigners) into your area so that maybe one of the providers will realize there is a market there! Good Luck!

  12. John;
    I do use an extension wire but stopped hanging it out the window as last year it got fired in the rain (I stopped doing that), but that was my fault. John Weeks (Comment above) has a link that could help us. I’m having my daughter research it, as I will never understand it.
    The two other Kano’s in my area are once a year visitors, so they are no help.
    Lighthouse Keepers and Motel “8’s” both keep a light in the window and we sailors thank you for that.

  13. I am looking at Globe LTE. There is a LIMITED coverage area for it, but my house is sitting well within their radius of coverage. I am hoping it will work fine for me, as PLDT has sent me two bills already and they have yet to even install anything in my home!!! AGH!!!!

    • I would advise being careful about using Globe LTE. Reason being that they limit the amount of data you can download per month, based on their Fair Use Policy. Your total bandwidth cap for the month is 3 Gb.

        • Hi John – I disagree with your statement that “most people shouldn’t be too concerned about it.” When you have signed up and are paying for speeds in the 20 Mbps+ range, and after a day of downloads the best you can get for the rest of the month is 0.2 Mbps, well, that would be a huge problem for me. It is certainly something that would concern me. I download the monthly allotment of 3 Gb in a fraction of a single day, so the FUP would greatly affect me, and in a very adverse way.

          • Bob – Many people (including myself) don’t have the same download volumes you apparently do and wouldn’t be affected by the fair-use policy (similar to the writer of the story I referenced above). Folks who use a dongle or tether to a mobile phone for access aren’t likely going to be downloading as much content over that sort of connection.

            For reference: I’m online a good 8-12 hours a day and am not having any problems. As with everything, “your mileage will vary”, but I stand by my statement.

            Meanwhile, folks like Paul and I have few options anyways. We get Globe where we live, so while we’d love to jump on the “Smart LTE Skyway”, there are sadly no exits in our respective barangays.

            • Yeah, I agree that everybody has different needs, and I was only talking about my own needs and that Globe would not work for ME because of true fup.

          • … And whoever said you were like “most people” anyways, Bob? I always thought you were pretty exceptional. 😉

  14. I have Globe Home Tattoo 4G about 2,700 pesos a month but very good. The tower is just across the road lol lol.

      • Paul – Not that long ago, the price for a big jug of Carlo Rossi red wine at this liquor store in Rehoboth where I go every weekend to run errands was a little over $8. On Fenwick Island where I live some 15 miles from Rehoboth, the same jug of red wine costs over $12.

        One weekend when I was in Rehoboth buying my jug of red wine, I couldn’t hold back my excitement over having to pay only $8, instead of $12, and blurted out to the cashier, “I’m glad I only pay $8 here for the same jug of red wine, back on Fenwick Island, I pay $12.”

        The very next weekend when I went back to Rehoboth to run errands and stopped at the liquor store, the very same big jug of Carlo Rossi red wine that used to sell for $8 was now selling for over $12, just like on Fenwick Island. 🙁

        • John;
          You did stimulate the economy by commenting about the price. But the upside is all the gas you’ll save because you no longer have the drive to Rehoboth, to get your wine, sheer genus.

          • Paul –

            Somehow my comment got lost in the translation. 🙂 I offered an analogy based on your response to john.j.’s comment about him paying “Globe Home Tattoo 4G about 2,700 pesos a month”, while you pay only P999.00 per month. You suggested that he ask the provider why such a big difference in price.

            Well, I did almost the same thing by telling the cashier at the liquor store in Rehoboth that their big jug of red wine costs $4 less than on Fenwick Island where I live. The next weekend I was back in Rehoboth, the liquor store upped their price by $4, from $8 to $12.

            Moral of story: “When the getting is good, you shut the hell up!” LOL

            • John;
              I understood where you were going, and pointed out that now the wine is $12.00 in both locations that you can save gas by not having to drive to the once cheaper store.