Wow I can’t believed it, that its already 8 years ago that Me and Bob decided to bring the whole family here to the Philippines to live for good. It was really a challenge at first. I really thought I can’t make it here. It was really hard for me and our second child Aaron at first. I felt so alone and I didn’t feel I know everybody. Even my whole family were strangers to me. I’m pretty sure they felt the same about me. I thought I was going insane here. Like I’m used to going places all by myself. Here I am in the mercy of the taxi driver or tricycle driver. I’m okay on that now I let my nephew drive for me now.
My past time used to be crafting or painting birdhouses. Here I can’t find anything like that in a store. I saw some ceramics store here in Davao, where you can buy an unfinished one and do it yourself kind of thing. Or they can even give you lesson on how to do it. Its kind of cool too.
Really when it comes to adjusting the lifestyle here I think me and my family are already used to it here. We liked it here a lot now. Our kids like their school a lot now too. Really the turning point for me to stay here was seeing our oldest son Chris (If you guys can recall on our early post here about our son Chris, he has special needs) got adjusted here so quickly. He loves it here. He likes to go to my mom and my sister’s house to hang out and play with his cousin. He learned to speak in Bisaya fluently in just 6 months. It’s really amazing for him to learn that quickly. We really are proud of him for that.
I think all of us, me and Bob and kids will stay here for the rest of our lives. This is our home now. We asked the kids sometimes if they would want to go back to the States to live? Their answers would be “NO”. They will say that, maybe just visit Granny when time that she can’t travel anymore. Hopefully it would still a long time from now.
Hey, there is still some stuff here that we are still adjusting, but its not that bad though. I think people that live here ahead of us can tell you that too. It’s really nice to live here, its just that you really have to have a lot of patience, trust with your partner and open mind to survived at first. It’s a tough and hard work for all of us to go through this far. Honestly its not easy especially for the first year or so. If you don’t trust your partner, your marriage will be done in just a few months. I am not scaring anybody I am just saying what we went through so that some of you would be aware already. That its just normal to go through all that stuff though. Maybe some of you had an easy adjustment living here. You can share with the group. I know some friends that are scared to move back here because of fear of a lifestyle adjustments here. I understand that too, we’ve been there.
Mabuhay!
Hi Feyma,
I guess I will see for myself..when I move to Southern Leyte, Rose is afraid I might not adjust too well here…but I have reassured her, that I am going to do my best to do so. I know it won't be easy for me, but I really want to try and I also want the experience of living there in the Philippines. I have a very open mind when it comes to new things…so I am hoping that will help me a lot too….oh..and also..I do have a lot of patience.
Also this site helps me out so much, hearing about your experiences and Bobs experiences living day to day in the Philippines and overcoming obstacles. It has really helped me so much. THanks so much for sharing your experiences with us all.
Salamat , at palaam para sa na
Danny
Hi Danny – I think every wife of a foreigner always have of moving here, if hubby can really adjust to life in the Philippines. That was my biggest fear before. But honestly its her that would have a hard time adjusting here especially if she already stayed abroad for a long time.
Hey you guys try it. I'm sure it will work out good for you and your wife.
I am glad that you find a lot of the information here are useful to you. Good luck to you and your wife in your upcoming move to Leyte.
Thank you so much for stopping by!
Feyma
i guess i am just thankful for the opportunity to live in this country, i was going to put beautiful country and it is that so i will say, yes beautiful country.
There are lots of problems i know there are here and more for the local population a lot of whom are really suffering at the moment
i am hoping ann and i won't have so much difficulties as you had, we have already been here 7 months in davao and so far, so good, but we had the house here, visited many times on holiday and so i guess we were a little bit more ready than you could be, arriving with your kids and having to settle straight away
enjoyed your story Feyma thanks
Hi rick b – Yeah I agree with you. It is hard to complain when millions of people had a hard life than us. I know we should be thankful of what we have.
I'm sure you and Ann will do great. You guys are lucky now with the internet you really learn a lot of stuff before moving here. With us before its really a trial and error. Even we came here a lot before moving back here it's really different than really staying here for a long time.
Take care and hi to Ann and baby!
Hi Feyma – I certainly understand what you mean. Though I have not moved back there, I've visited a few times. It is an uneasy feeling when you come back home & it no longer feels like, well, home.
There are many reasons why but one aspect (for me anyway) is that a person may be more critical of their own culture while the foreign spouse is more forgiving of the differences & may even find them fascinating.
To their credit, they are more open to adjusting to a new culture while we, on the other hand, we have changed. I hope that makes sense.
I am glad things have worked out for you & your family.
hi feyma,
so who had the hardest time adjusting there, you or bob? You know i hope to living back there one day. There's not a day that go by that i don't think about how nice life would be once we go back to the Philippines and live there. But at the same time, i really don't know for sure wether i will be able to tolerate the lifestyle and the system there after having been pampered and spoiled here in the states. I'd like to think that i'm still a tough cookie and that my husband will have the hardest time adjusting. But like you said it was you who went through the hardest.
thanks for sharing your experience. Meantime i'll keep dreaming about literally living in the philippines.
janet
Hi Feyma, I really envy your life there while I'm still here languishing in the US. I hope that a few years from now it will be me writing a blog post like this! Cheers! 😉
Hi Macky – I totally agree with you. Honestly, I never thought you felt that way because your family is more open what I mean, they see a lot of the other side of the world than my family. Is it because they didn't really lived there and never experience what we did went through living abroad? Just a thought.
I really give credit to Bob, he understands here better than I do at first. It took me awhile to really adjust to the life here. Still I have more adjusting to do here. 🙂
Thanks for stopping by Macky!
Take care!
Hi Jan – I am the one having the hardest time living here at first. It took a lot of adjusting on my part. Really it helps me that Bob and I had an agreement and a goal before coming here. Before we came here to lived we both agreed to each other that no matter what happened we have to stay here for 5 years bad or good time. If not for that I was ready to go back to the States in just a month. It was hard, but looking back now its all worth it.
I can't see myself living back there anymore. I love living here now. Good for our health and we made more money here. I can say that life is good for us here.
Good luck to you. Hey stop dreaming do it… 🙄 😉 🙂
Hi Mia – Hey common down here. Try it out. It will work out for you… 😉
Really when your ready it will happen.
Good luck to you!
Thank you for stopping by. Take care!
Your intial years back mirrors my hardships when I first moved to Canada. It was very difficult to adjust to a new way of life as a foreigner. Plus – studying, raising a child and paying 21% mortgage. Not fun. In the Philippines, the family unit is strong and would have helped, but I chose to weather the hardships on my own – t'was a very lonely struggle. You are right, a lot of patience and open-mindedness can help you survive. To this I would add a strong determination to make it succeed. Now, I am back – and adjusting again – but this is easy for me now – I am experienced! 😀 As for my husband? He is experienced too! 😀 We talk and we laugh at the experiences he is going through. Maybe I should cry – but hey, why take it too seriously?
Hey, I paint too and am frustrated that I can't get good quality brushes and acrylics here. I am not good like Macky; am more a copycat. But I think I am better than the "paint-by-numbers" type. 😆
Hi Ellen – Similar experience when I went to the States too. The adjustments is really hard. You are right you have to have the strong determination in your mind to really succeed. Its not easy to go through but can be achieve. We did it. Cheers to both of us! 😉 🙂
Do you think you will stay here in the Philippines for good? Hey, maybe you just have to order brushes from the States and send it here. Or maybe they have in Manila. I know, can't compare to Macky, his the best. 🙂
Hope to see you sometime soon in Samal. Take care and God bless!
The rest of my painting supplies are in Norway. Nothing much to do when I am there – and I am also trying out their painting style called rosemaling. You are right, it should be easy to order supplies from US or Canada.
The problem of owning a mobile home (sailboat) is that you will eventually get the itch to move on. Having dual citizenships, we really are lucky. Between the 2 of us, we have a choice of Philippines, Norway and Canada. We are just taking it easy – making no major decisions for now. Just got a mail from our Kiwi friends who sailed to Japan from Luzon and eventually to Vancouver (35 day crossing). Japan sounds awesome and they said Vancouver is super expensive compared to Japan. Strange – but I tend to think now that living anywhere in Asia (even in Japan) must be a hell of a lot cheaper than anywhere else. We noticed that in our travels as well, so I think Davao will be a good base for us, as it is also typhoon free here. Plus, a centre point between North America and Europe.
Feel free to come and visit anytime. Cheers.
Hi Ellen – I agree with you it is cheaper to live here than in the States or Canada or Europe. I hope it stays that way for a long time.
Thats one thing we love about living here no typhoons and it rains during night time most of the time.
Be in your place sometimes and I will bring some cookies. 😉 🙂
Take care!
Making allowances for the Filipino wife needing a time of adjustment here is really important. As far as my own experience goes, it's _much_ easier for the foreigner husband t adjust than for the wife who grew up here. Part of this is, I think, many places bend ove backward to help the foreigner while expecting the Filipina to "know her place" … don't let ht efact that the Philippines has had two woamn presidents now trick you into thinking that women aren't treated very much "second class" here.
Secondly, the wife is often "badgered"by family for help and other family issues that often aren't communicated to the husband … it's usually the wife who has to bear the burden of educating family and neaighbors that the 'kano' is none made of money and the family can't support everyone with a need. This is not easy on her at all.
Third, many things in a "conventional" marriage that men don't even notice are not nearly as easy here. Even food shopping is so, so much easier in the US … here you have to work at it … and just finding the cleaning supplies you used every week in the US is difficult … and exspensive in comparison.
I lived in Japan 3 years. Metro Tokyo. I lived on less money per month there than I had been spending in Colorado. That said, there are many prices that would water your eyes. Food and transportation in particular is very expensive. Traffic is horrendous, makes Manila look like a country town. That being said, I'd live there again in a heartbeat. I just happened to like it. Every place has is plusesand minuses.
Brushes and art supplies? Hong Kong I would think. Cheap flights from the Philippines, easy entry even for Filipinos, wonderful specialty shops, street markets that would make a real shopper start losing her breath and very effective, cheap transportation. I'd bet there are good brushes availble there.
Hi Dave Starr – Well said there Dave. Can't agree you more on that. Thank you for the good explanation.
As always thank you for your good thought. Take care!