While eating al fresco style on a balmy Friday night overlooking the star kissed Subic Bay; three tables joined together at the By-The-Sea Resort, with a few friends in attendance I with one ice cold San Miguel beer and a full plate of Mongolian BBQ on the table in front of me. These are the kind of days I live for.
Our daughter Ymir Thea and my grandson Jayden (AKA: The Lil’ Dude) declined to join us, our other daughter YoHanna May and husband Chris had taken my Granddaughter Colleen to Pampanga to the Fontana Resort for her Swim Meet and to celebrate the Chinese New Year. And of course she won more medals!
The conversation was light and humorous; all was right with the world until Mayang’s new smart phone started chirping away. The number was not one she knew but she took the call anyway, as we might have won a million pesos or maybe we could avail ourselves of a new condo in Manila. No such luck, it was our daughter Ymir Thea (Yhen) in a blind panic on our neighbor Anna’s phone.
I’m busy chowing down and consuming cold SMB’s obvious to the pandemonium brewing around me. But I knew something was amiss by the reaction of the other Tagalog speakers at the table, and hell even the waiter knew what was going on before I found out.
The story as relayed to me: Yhen excited the house to on the light in the car port. A 30 second trip, when she heard the heavy Nara Wood front door of the house slam shut with a resounding bang (I’m paraphrasing here) It seems that her 20 month old son (The Lil’ Dude) noticed that the door had been left open and dutifully closed it. Of course the lock was engaged, which left the mother on the outside looking in the window at a proud son on the inside smiling with pride.
Panic and mayhem are now the order of the night; hands are raised in alarm, and a chorus of “Aye, Aye, Aye” echoes’ into the night on both ends of the phone. All eyes look to me for my reaction. Do you really believe I’d not have a contingence plan? Oh ye of little faith!
I relieved Mayang of her phone and instruct my daughter to send a kid who is sitting on my wall out front. (They are always there as I provide a street light) to her Tito Juhn and put him on the phone when he arrives. My friend and I have another beer while waiting. Hey what else would you have done?
I put the beer down raise the phone up and simply explained to my brother-in-law Juhn what to do; “Juhn, go to man cave, get hacksaw off the wall, pick a first floor window that appeals to you, slid the glass and screen back and saw off the padlock on the jail house window, open said jail window and climb in. All this was accomplished while receiving a play by play narrative from Ymir Thea on the phone. At the dinner table you could have heard a pin drop, and my food being chewed. A collective cheer went up within the restaurant as Mother and child were back within each other’s arms, the old lock thrown away and new one installed. The carport light had been on’ed. Juhn returned home and the Year of the Horse had been properly rung in and all was right again, within my preview.
A collective sigh of relief (In Tagalog) rose from my table and the wait staff milling around and even a few raised thumbs from both Pinoy’s and Kano’s sitting at other tables who had been observing our little soap opera transpiring. Let the New Year celebrations continue!
Was the problem solved? Could Paul order his next beer? Ney no so! The problem had been rectified and all was well on the Eastern Front, but Paul had to go home “NOW” so mother and daughter could commiserate with each other, and relive the adventure over and over again. As I took that long walk toward the New Old Honda, every man there knew exactly what was going on, and knew that for the Grace of God, it might have been them. I could see the simpatico within their collective eyes.
And yes I’ve had to do this house entrance twice myself, over the years; I hope that will explain why I keep a box of spare locks in my “Gold Locker.” in my Man Cave. Where is the key to the jail bars you might ask? They are near each window but not close enough to reach from the outside, even if you knew where they are hanging. I refused to be locked into a burning house with no swift egress to the outside.
At home once again Lil Dude and I played on the floor with a few of his toy trucks. For he was totally innocent of all wrong doing, as he is a toddler that was only doing what toddlers do for a living. While Mother and Lola rehashed what had transpired that evening over and over again.
So for the year of the Horse I wish you all: “Gong Xi Fa Ca!”
Or translated from Mandarin: “Wishing you prosperity”
I don’t like any New Years at all…
All is well that ends well. Thank God, or maybe Lolo’s training lil Dude didn’t have a hand wrapped around the edge of the door when it slammed shut.
Loren;
A few months ago he did just that, and caught his hand but not very hard as he is not that strong. So I taught him to push the door using both hands and laugh when it slams shut and makes the big noise. His mother was pleased that I removed the danger out of the equation, but she is the one who forgot to unlock the door.(When I was blamed I pointed that fact out.)
Dear Readers;
In an e-mail Bob Martin posed the very valid question as to why I didn’t have a key hidden outside somewhere. Here is the answer I provided hi: The only time any house I’d ever lived in had been broken in to, was in Puerto Rico, using the key they found that I’d hidden outside. So either I’m terrible at hiding stuff or the malefactor was very good at finding stuff that was the last time I did that.
Paul,
Glad it all turned out alright. You did a good job of training the little guy and being prepared for anything that can happen. He did what he was supposed to do and had fun doing it. Mongolian BBQ sure sounds good along with warm weather lol.
Larry;
Now that I think about it I can’t remember eating Mongolian BBQ on a cold day.
One of the main reasons I never lose my temper with children is because they normally doing what they are suppose to do. Kinda’ like us guys after six beers.
..”The only time any house I’d ever lived in had been broken in to, was in Puerto Rico, using the key they found that I’d hidden outside…” 🙂 I know the feeling, Mr. Thompson. I used to live in Levittown while attached at Ft. Buchanan. Came home one afternoon and my small (beer) fridge was gone! (They even took the extra case of India from the garage.) Glad you’re enjoying it in the Philippines better than in Humacao or Fajardo. Cheers. 🙂
Jose;
I miss the hell out of Puerto Rico, but I’m here now and liking it.
In San Diego I had a Ref with a keg in it on the deck of my condo in Imperial Beach. No one ever stole it but I was forever finding friends sitting there drinking when I got home. (They chipped in for the new kegs so I didn’t care)
Mr. Thompson: I also miss Puerto Rico especially Don Q and Ron Llave. I wonder if El Caribe and La Riviera are still around? Cheers to you again and enjoy the sunshine in ROP. (PHL now.) 🙂
Jose;
Ah the rum, one of the many things I miss.
Alock box with a combo is what I use. Only thing is when you give someone the combo once, you can change it after that.
Real estate agents use these all the time.
I have the same thing at my house
Hudson;
But do you have a ref, just for beer?
I have 3 refrigerators, and no beer. I’m no longer allowed to drink carbonated beverages…so I drink something a little stronger 🙂 problem solved.
Hudson;
NO MORE BEER??? Oh the humanity of it all. For me that would also mean no rum and coke…
Bless me O’ Lord I’m ready to go.
Joe;
Beer and combo locks do not mix well for me, so the saw method is what I’ll stick with until I can’t afford to buy another lock. But if Obama gets out in 2016 and doesn’t become the king, I should have enough money to survive.
Oh man I had tears in my eyes from laughing so hard. I like how you dodged the blame bullet. Of course you had to go home NOW so they could talk about it…..just like when my wife and friends are at a party for several hours talking but still need to call each other as soon as they get home!
Yes, I had to laugh too. Many years ago among our little crowd, the fad was to have a DVD recorder running in some corner while there was a gathering of Filipinos. No matter how long the gathering lasted, there were always several folks who would gather again at someone’s home to watch the entire film again, and talk some more.
Take care,
Pete
Pete;
My neighbor Friday afternoon had a birthday party for his one year old, as if the kid will remember it. But the damnable karaoke was there, the party ended at 19:00 and the crowd left, (me too) but the singing continued until 05:00 the next morning. Kinda’ like the DVD?
Yup. I suppose they have to get their money’s worth out of the thing.
Take care,
Pete
Pete;
I would have paid them more to shut it off…
Miguk;
The after party phone call is something I forgot about, but you are so right, I wonder why it’s required? My grandson had no idea something had gone wrong, so we played cars on the floor.
And, once again, it is Paul to the rescue! What ever would the do without you?
Tom N;
They so stuff like that so often I have a plan for solving it prepared, but there are times when even I’m surprised. But I still love it here!
Well, all turned out well, huh? I’m glad you use a brand of padlock that can be sawn through too, coz those toughened ones really cause a downer in my burglary business.
Jim;
Locks are never made to keep you out, just slow you down. I figure I’ll be awake and standing there by the time they break in. Make sure the body is found on the inside of your house to prevent legal problems.
My neighbor came running to my house two winters ago. It seems she had done the same thing, only it was snowing, and was barefoot and no coat. We leant her some shoes, and a coat, and went to her house to see her son of about two years of age behind the closed and locked door. Mom was hysterical of course, and I simply and calmly talked him into unlocking the door. He was afraid at first because he had NEVER seen me before. LOL. The door was opened, the shoes and coat returned, and all was well.
Glad your event turned out well too!!! Sorry your dinner and time with friends was cut short.
Scott;
Lil Dude has not learned about doorknobs yet or he’d be outside more than in. When he’s older maybe, but for now I still have extra locks.
By the way did you ever question the lady as to why she was outside with no shoes?
Paul, where did you hide the key they used to break in into your house in Puerto Rico? Under the front door mat, I”ll bet. LOL None of us ever got locked out of our house, but a spare key remained hidden under the decorative white stones under the birdbath on the front lawn just in case. The birdbath was made of concrete, it takes two people to lift it. Would anyone think of finding a house key there?
Once during my working days while looking for a parking space on Capitol Hill, I got locked out of my car with the engine running. My wife had to bring the spare key from home. Since then, I kept a spare key taped securely in the engine compartment.
John;
First, how does one open the hood of your car if the doors are locked, unless you drive a classic 57 Chevy or other older car?
Oh and thanks for telling us where the house key is located, but there was no internet in Puerto Rico for me to tell the world.
My “Hidden” key was in the trunk of my spare cars parked in my carport. I had the car keys also locked into the house but I then remembered that the trunk could be opened from the dash pocket, and the thief was maybe just going to rob my car when the house keys appeared like magic when he popped the trunk.
Gosh, the car lockout happened so long ago I don’t even remember what make or model year the car was, but am pretty sure it was way post-1957 American car before the days of interior hood release. I wouldn’t have thought of the idea of keeping a spare key under the hood if the hood wasn’t openable from outside the car.
John’
Put one check mark in Paul’s column for figuring out the car’s approximate age.
We had the mother in law lock our bedroom with the keys inside, the door handle type with the button in the middle. It was the brother in law that sorted it out by carefully removing a jalacy widow pain through the window bars and with a 15′ length of bamboo with a split end managed to turn the door knob. At The time I didn’t think to ask where he learnt that trick.
I saw a re-run of “Whatever happened to Baby Jane” the other night, where the maid was trying to open a locked door by removing the bolt from the door’s hinges that are accessible from outside the door. A curious architectural design by present day standards, but the house appeared to be a Victorian-era mansion in LA.
John;
It must be the magic of movies, what a dumb builder it would take to put the hinges on the outside.
Gary;
I seen that bamboo trick before and it works well. My two daughters as teenagers were forever locking their keys in their room of our newly built house. I would just take a screwdriver and push it into the lock and twist it open. (Yes I stocked spare doorknobs also) But I’d wait two weeks before I’d fix it and soon the lesson was learned.
I remember being locked inside my room on my birthday many years ago. I had to scream from the window, from the 2nd floor of our house, to make someone aware that the birthday girl will be late and to start the party without me. :))
**Glad Li’l Dude is okay.**
Badzie;
I’m trying to figure how the padlock was on the outside of your door and why? But I hope they got you out for the party. Oh and the Lil Dude didn’t even know anything was wrong.
The door knob was broken or something. Won’t open. They had to call someone to get it fixed. 😀
Badzie;
Oh now I understand!