In 1999 when we moved into the house upon the mountain we did have electricity, but no land line for telephones, no city water and no cable TV. So answers were needed. Cell phones were one solution, sinking a 300 foot well solved the water problem. And the TV was an antenna on a 40 bamboo pole. That to me was no answer at all, a few days later while riding down the Zig Zag to Olongapo City I saw a house with a new shiny Satellite Dish attached to the roof. I turned my owner jeep around and went back and asked the home owner where they got that. They explained it was a new company in the Philippines and the man kindly gave me the business address.
We went straight there and met Anna, the local representative for Dream Satellite TV, She explained it all to me and the following day she and her minion were at my house hooking everything up. There were only 50 channels but that was better than the two we received by the bamboo pole system. Another problem solved. Next were brownouts that occurred for what seemed like no particular reason. The Honda Generator fixed that. Since I was still working as a Merchant Seaman, I found that all problems could be solved if you just threw enough money at it. Now that I’m retired I have become more inventive in my solutions.
Time went on when a year later Anna called and said for just a few dollars extra they were running a promo and I could avail of a second Dream System for a song. They came the next day. Now it came with an extra dish, but the hook-it up guy said I should just store the extra dish as a splitter could be used to send the signal to both converter boxes upstairs and down. A good plan, until eight years later Anna called again to inform us that Dream Company was swapping out all their converter boxes for a new ones. Mayang and Anna saw each other all the time and had become buddies but she was not involved in the switching deal. But she did warned us that shady contractors were involved
The swap out was being done out of “HQ” Manila so one day a Dream Company stranger came to the gate and had the two new boxes. All went well until he needed to go to the roof and adjust the old dish. Shock rained down on my house, how could I possibly be using two boxes with only one dish? I gave him the Pinoy shoulder shrug He would have to report me and discontinue our service. But he could sell me a new dish and install it now. Ah you little shit from Manila, you be trying to scam the Kano. In flash I left and returned with that extra dish I’d been storing for low those many years. I smiled and said go ahead and install it. Now he scratched his head and tried to back out, reverse gears, extricate himself from the extra work he now had to do for “FREE”
I was just angry enough to make him remove the splitter, and climb up on the roof in the hot sun and install the extra dish. And he did because I explained that I surely didn’t want my service disconnected. Boy that made me feel good. (There is a dash of evil flowing through my bones.)
Now for the famous 16 July typhoon I wrote about a few weeks ago, one dish ran away from home, flew the coop never to work again. Anna and our Satellite TV “Guy” arrived to fix the system on Sunday 20 July. He started laughing and asked how long I’d lived here, after he saw the repair job I did on the remaining dish, the clear plastic cap had broken off, so I cut a plastic sandwich bag and duct taped it over the opening. He said he could sell me a new receiver head for P1, 400.00 or I could just leave it the way it was. I took; “the way it was” option. He said that my way was the way he would have fixed his own. I was quite proud of my jury-rig so all he had to do was remove the broken stand for the missing dish and install a new splitter to put everything back to right once more.
Except the satellite reception during any rain, will cause the TV signal to cut off. But I can fix that (See Photo) also my daughter is hooked up to the old fashion antenna so they can see “Eat Bulaga” Me I’ve downloaded season one to twenty of “Gunsmoke” and watch an episode when the satellite goes out. I was out to sea when it originally showed so I never saw it before.
Before he left, my satellite “GUY “told me to rain proof the new splitter on the wall, and then he smiled and said he knew I could handle that. Hell yeah, bubble wrap and more duct tape and the signal was flowing. Anna asked me to see her if I ever needed to work again, but our “Guy” already had an assistant and I’d not want to kick over the kids rice bowl.
So as it was in the beginning now it is once more, one dish and one splitter, and my friend from Manila can pack sand for I be a Satellite dish repairing kind of guy.
That Paul is magic with words. Great true to life stories – and entertaining reading.
Stephen;
Thank you for your kind words. I’m pleased you enjoyed it.
Thanks for a good laugh Paul. You know your blood runs Pinoy when you start to think like them. That’s not always a bad thing because locals have been surviving and flourishing all their lives on almost no money, just creative repair techniques. A lot can be said for that. Just one way of telling folks ” I am no tourist and am here to stay” without ever opening your mouth! In my brief two and a half tears here I catch myself doing some of the same things, especially when I have over extended my budget for the month.
Joe;
I have learned a lot here from just keeping my trap shut and watching, I’ve seen some of the most inventive solutions that I can remember and if they work than they are fine with me. The street is now paved, but the Nation Highway is three feet higher during the rain all the sand collects there and it has no stones in it, perfect sand for cement mixing. I say there and smiled as two guys everyday fill bags with it and sell it to anyone doing renovations. As a Kano, I never would have thought of that. Pure genius.
AS always, entertaining reading…
I have learned a lot of DIY repair things here, I have watched how they do things and use materials that is “at hand”.
It’s amazing what can be fixed with some plastic, tape and bamboo. Solutions i wouldn’t dream of could work, but it does.
Your arrangement with the umbrella makes me laugh. I have a satellite dish too and there’s no signal in heavy rain. I just wonder if that umbrella works at all?? Isn’t it in the higher altitude the problem is? As the company tells me it isn’t the rain itself that is the problem, but heavy clouds and atmospheric disturbance. Just saying 😀
Axel;
The umbrella was for pure fun, but if someone were to try it I hope they let us know. I really don’t know the true reasons but that is why I keep a USB handy with back episodes of “GUNSMOKE” I’m already in my 7th year with only 13 years to go (34-43 episodes a year back then)
But my repair job is holding up and on the few sunny days all is fine, unless there us a brownout. It is an adventure living here. (LOL)
Ahhh Ok….:D (umbrella).
I don’t think there’s much to do with the signal in bad weather, i guess the satellites can’t penetrate Philippines heavy clouds. Though…second thought: GPS….using satellites, but works in all conditions, so why not TV signals? Never mind, maybe i should start to collect some good movies, but at least i have my Internet, no matter weather.
Yeah, it is an adventure living here, reuse of almost anything is becoming a sport, never throw things away as would have done “back there”. Never knows when things come in handy 😀
Axel;
Onboard ship we have “Gold Lockers” if you swap out a part, we strip the old part down and keep all the good, ever nut washer and bolt. If someone can’t find what they need within their “Gold Locker” they’ll come to see you. I do that here and my in-laws check my gold locker before ever going to a hardware store.
Everything in the Philippines has value one way or another.
If the umbrella doesn’t work, maybe a yellow raincoat would.
Just wandering, do the satellite receivers there have built in DVR’s. You said you could record things to a flashdrive for future viewing, but the receivers here in the US seem to be made so that only the built in DVR is the only recording option, and of course they charge extra for that luxury here. My monthly sat. bill has so many “extras” added to it, it pisses me off every month with all the extra taxes, each piece of equipment is billed separately, I am surprised they dont charge me monthly rent on the spliters and cable, its only a matter of time I guess til they do.
Bill S.
Here you can record right off the satellite feed for free,, but I download off the internet (Please NSA I’m only joking I would never do that)
U spent so much of my life at sea or out of the country that Gunsmoke is still new to me. I just downloaded House Of Card Season one and it is great. It’s still very much unregulated here so it’s like the states 30 years ago but with better electronics.
I love the umbrella on the receiver! LOL
Rico;
I know you know I was joking with that picture. (LOL)
Awesome story, Paul. I had Colorview CATV up until I left in July, 2013. From experience, cable doesn’t seem to be any better than satellite, with outages nearly every day (even without an accompanying brownout). Now, they upgraded to digital and HD while I’ve been gone, but I loathe to return and start using them again. I’m seriously considering Dream Satellite, which is supposed to be better than Cygnal. Of course, it’s for my wife, not me. I don’t watch television, even here in the US. Whatever I want to watch, I watch online. It’s a bit more difficult to do it there, but it’s okay because I probably watch less than 2 hours of anything in a given week.
I don’t think that umbrella trick would work for me either. Too much wind, even if the wind IS hot most of the time.
RT Cunningham;
As I pointed out I went 30 to 35 years without much TV in my life due to my job. So I watch it now but still a little every day. I’m a reader first, but the internet allows me to pick what I want. I watch TMZ everyday here on Dream that show cracks me up as they point out how trivial celebrities really are. If I had a choice between cable and satellite, cable would win as my friends seem to get great service in our area. My wife would be happy with the 40 foot bamboo pole so she can get her local news fix every day, and PBA games. (I download my books also, as the price is right.)
Thanks for another enjoyable read to start off another week. You might have a very marketable idea with that umbrella Paul. I have seen what I would call those semi-sleaze advertizements for a piece of foil to go on the back of cell phones for ” Improved Signal ” . Come up with a fancy umbrella and market it ” For improved performance of your Satellite TV ” . Keeping the heat from the sun off of the dish electronics really could extend the life of it, maybe , and if cracks in the plastic cover ever happened the umbrella ” might ” give it additional protection. LOL. Perfect for what we used to call those late night ” as seen on tv ” adds. Maybe you could even do informercials and webinars on it too !
I would have loved to see the look on the face of the ” Guy ” from Manila who ” encouraged ” you to buy a second dish or else, when all of a sudden you present him with the second dish you already had. Good one Paul !
Bob New York;
Dial 1-800-parasol and have your credit card ready, $9.99 and it will never Wear tear or gather hair, rust bust or gather dust.
My Manila buddy will think twice before he messes with another Kano.
Nice article Paul. Personally, I’m more of a radio/music guy than TV(apart from sport!). Over the years, I’v tried most options. A few years ago, I found Dream quiet good, while Cygnal’s channels were rather restricted(no BBC!). I now have Sky, and I’m happy with them so far!
The bit about now being retired, and on a pension, certainly struck a chord. Likewise, when I was working, and just visiting here, I just paid whatever, to get the job done. Now It’s a different store! We just have to find ways!
John Powers;
Retirement halted my free spending days, but it was time for that anyway on the ship we’d joke with the Pinoy crewmates when they came back in the morning broke after a night of “Millionaire for the Day” But it’s hard to point blame when the Chief Steward, Chief Engineer the ship’s Master and I ran up a $1,800.00 bar bill at Raffles Long Bar in Singapore.
We have a few Cygnal dishes where I live but Dream seems to be the most popular. And as for music the stereo plays most of the day until “Eat Bulagar” comes on that is when I go to my man cave.
Paul,
That was a very entertaining article and clever ‘fix it’. It’s amazing how so much can be done with so little! Always enjoy your stories and experiences!
Thank you!
Bill
Bill;
The quick fix is the way to go, save the money for more beer.
Mr. Paul T, another funny and good article. “jury-rig ” …cheez I hadn’t heard that since Danang, RVN! 🙂 Thanks for another BZ write up.
Jose;
Jury-rig was one of the first terms you learn in the Navy, and on Merchant Ship’s too.
LMAO Paul! atta boy! Yankee ingenuity, that’s why we’re the greatest country on earth!
Heinz;
I received training on Jury rigging in the Navy and the Merchant Marine kinda’ like OJT; I received my Doctorates’ Degree in it, here in the Philippines.