Filipinos are a very gentle people. They are very quiet and demure. They speak very softly, sometimes so softly that sometimes it is difficult to hear what they say. Of course, you already know these things, because we hear it all the time.
STOP! Wait, is it true?
If Filipinos are so gentle and quiet, then why do we also hear complaints from our fellow foreigners (myself included) about the noise problem here? Oh, I know… you are saying that the noise is from the dogs, the roosters and the traffic. Is it, though?
I did not plan on writing about this topic today, but a while ago I was in my office making some coffee. I keep all my coffee supplies in the office and have a little “coffee station” there where I can brew up some wonderful coffee concoctions. When I was standing there waiting for the brew to finish, a group of construction workers next door was taking a break. They were sitting in a group of a half dozen or so, and talking. These guys were probably 60 to 80 feet away from me, and I could hear the entire conversation! And, I didn’t have to strain to hear it, or be quiet so I could “eavesdrop” on them. No, even if i was loud in what I was doing, the conversation could not be avoided. And, I was inside the house and in a different house from where they were! They were downright loud! They were not abnormally noisy either, not fighting or arguing, just having a normal conversation!
The same thing happened yesterday. In the morning I went into my office and sat down at my desk to get to work. In the mornings, I like to keep my office windows open to let the morning air permeate the office. Yesterday morning, though, when I sat down, after only 5 minutes or so, I had to get up and close the windows, because all the conversation among the construction workers next door was just so loud, I couldn’t even concentrate! Even with the windows closed, I could still “listen in” on what the guys next door were talking about!
Another example of this is in my own household. A lot of times, if I am upstairs in the bedroom of my house, with the kitchen directly below me, I can listen to the entire conversation of my kids and other family members downstairs! Sometimes, if I am watching TV, I even have to turn up the volume so that I can hear what is said on the TV show over the conversation downstairs! And, I am not talking about hearing muffled noises from downstairs, I am talking about being able to understand everything that is said!
Why is it that we have an image in our heads that Filipinos are very quiet and gentle people, but in actuality they can be quite noisy? As this thought came to me because of the “conversation” next door this morning, it kind of amazed me. The truth is that Filipinos can be quite quiet in talking, sometimes very reserved. I find this to be the case when they talk to me, as a foreigner or an ousider, not part of their “core group” – but when the group or barkada is all together, all inhibitions go out the window, voices move up to “loud” and the conversation is ON.
What do you think? Have you noticed this too?
Bob
YES I have noticed this, to the point that even when there is a small get together (3 or 4) the conversations get Loud and Excited almost sounding like a Fist Fight is about to go down.
Sometimes out of the blue there can be a sudden outburst that make me snap my head around. You may think that being married to a Filipina for 24 yrs I would be used to this.
Hi Bob – I found that in conversations – usually with more than two people involved but not necessarily more than two – Filipinos will speak loudly (and repeat themselves numerous times) to make their point known. Speaking loudly, even on the telephone, is something one has to endure. It won't change just for a Kano! 🙂
You'll always hear everything that is said: Either directly with your ears or indirectly via bamboo grapevine chizmis! 😆
mayongbuntag bob
ah yes sometimes filipinos are quiet but if you walk by any school at any time it is sooo loud,im surprised the teachers can even teach.it was amazing how terrible it was.i also noticed the kids are only quiet when thier sleeping hehehe.
most filipinos are light spoken most times though.
salamat bob
Hi Neal – I genuinely love Filipino people, but they are certainly a loud bunch! 😆 There have been many times, before I could speak the language, when based only on the tone and loudness of the conversation, I thought that a fight was about to happen too! 😉
Hi Paul – Ha ha… that Bamboo grapevine does extend the conversation even beyond the hearing distance! I prefer, though, to call it the "Coconut Telegraph."
Hi RonW – Ha ha.. yes, the schools, and basically anyplace with a large gathering are indeed quite loud! That is one reason why I am concerned about the school that is under construction next door to my house!
oh no bob you better be moving to samal soon or you will have to rent a seperate office in the jungle just to consintrate,,hahahaha jokin my friend
Hi Bob – Ha…maybe the house just needs better insulation.
Hi RonW – Funny that you should mention that… I will be sharing some news about Samal next week! Stand by…
Hi rc – I don't know if I have ever seen a Philippine house with Insulation before… Nor have I ever seen it for sale in a building supply store.
No insulation? That must be why the AC bills are so high…
🙂
Actually, when my good lady has a few friends or family around, I have to retreat to my office and use my iPod loud! It's like they are competing to see who can shout loudest. Introduce a bottle of wine, or bring out the Magic Sing and a bag of chiken feet (adidas) and all hell breaks loose!
Yes very, very true! If you've been to any family reunions or just a neighborhood late afternoon get-together, Filipinos will ruin your eardrums.
Hi Jim – I can just hear that iPod/Filipino Conversation contest! Ha ha….. iPod can only go so loud, though! 😯
Hi Cathy – I was a little bit hesitant to write this article, because I thought it might come across that I was talking bad about Filipinos, which is not my intention. So, I'm glad to have confirmation from you! 😆 Thanks for dropping by.
it's like living next to an airport after a while it goes away haha
Hi Tommy – Yeah, but I thought that they already grounded the Concorde! Ha ha… sometimes I think it flies around my house sometimes! 😆
Bob,
What I have noticed, when a Filipino speaks English and are shy of their pronunciation they speak in a low voice. When they are talking Bisaya to me, sounds like an argument. They are loud and with the harsh sounds of the words, it sounds like they are mad.
Maayong Buntag Bob
I had to laugh about this article. We have the Filipino parties at our house every once and a while and the kano banas always are amazed at how loud the party will get. But it does make the party fun and exciting. The part that amazes me is the way the filipinos can have multiple people talking at the same time and can listen to every one that is talking. I cannot get one conversation when multiple people are talking so it must be a Filipino talent.
Hey Bob,
I agree that's a myth about filipinos being quiet.
My wife told me when I first met her that her family, although living in Tacurong, were originally from Iloilo and were ilonngo who were very softly spoken people.
I have to turn the volume on the tv almost to max to drown her out when she is talking with friends in person or on the phone. The other thing is she always likes to talk on the phone next to me when I am watching tv or doing something on the computer. Man it is so loud I have thought about getting earplugs.
Our little dogs tremble with fear when she is annoyed and she turns on a guttural harsh tone of voice.
I think the only time filipinos are quiet is when they are talking to a "white" and that is out of deference or shyness.
Hi Bruce – Yeah, I have never heard Filipinos being too loud in English, but in Bisaya, if there is a group of people, things get going quickly and the volume goes up, up, up! It's amazing to see…. oops… I mean hear! 😆
Maayong Gabii, Larry – Kumusta ka? Yeah, I've been to quite a few of those Filipino parties myself, and the volume is high, the words are flying, and everybody has a good time! At least I think they do! 😉
Hi Michael – Ha ha.. I had a good laugh when I read your comment! I had to agree with almost everything you said. When I am trying to watch TV and somebody in the household is going to use the phone nearby, I generally just mute the TV – there is no use even trying to hear it!! 😉
Just turn up the Karaoke Bob 🙂 ..sometime that will work but no promises..My wife is very loud ..sometimes I think the barangay captan will put up sign by our place …NO LOUD NOISES …I think the neighbors know what is heppening at our house so they don't have to come over to visit…sonetimes they will burst out in a loud laugh and I go deaf for a few minutes …earplugs sound like a good idea too …Phil n Jess
Hi Bob!
When I commented to Dave last I gave you an exemption from the cranky old man that frequents coffee shops classification. Hmmm your sounding a bit cranky! Just teasing!!!! I understand because Marie has a loud infectous laugh while talking to her friends. I have learned to embrace it as I love seeing her happy. The only thing that bothers me is the huge sound system that is brought out for parties. It is so loud that the vibrations make me nauseous. My mother used to smack me across the face if I spoke while she watched television so I have always had the policy that real people come first and television comes last. Some might call it child abuse but maybe it was just a poorly taught lesson on what is important in life. I know my mother was no June Clever! ha ha! I do feel for you living in a construction zone. I hope you find a workable solution to your problem.
Hi Phil – 😉 I hear you, my friend!
Hi Tom – Yeah, I saw your comment where you told Dave that I was exempted from being a cranky old man. That's why I wrote thing, figured I needed to toughen up my image a bit! 😉
hi bob
In case you are not aware, there are some languages and dialects in the philippines that are inherently loud, bisaya language is one of them, there are some dialects in the pines that are low and soft even when they are in the middle of an argument
Hi dans – Ha ha.. I never thought about that. I believe you, though. For one thing, I know that in Ilonggo, when they talk it sounds like they are singing, and I have been told that even when they are mad, they don't sound mad. So, I believe you are 100% correct on that! 😉
kapampangan (from pampanga) is one of the very loud dialect, dialects from the north are soft and low particularly the dialects from the mountain province.
tagalog are not that loud, bicolano are soft too.
can you imagine a movie with a fighting scene with an artist from ilo-ilo with an ilonggo dialect or accent? 🙂
It's true, Filipinos are loud. I'm pretty quiet (I take after my mom) and often get mistaken by other Filipinos as being a snob or aloof. When I was working in Germany, at lunch time I would join the other Filipinas. It would get so loud in the lunch room (they don't even notice that I remain quiet), that other employees in the building would come by and close the door to the lunch room!
I've noticed that often, when talking with Marielle via Skype, there will be a conversation going on in the background between her children and niece (and Marielle too, sometimes) that to me sounds on the verge of breaking into a fistfight, but turns out to be just normal conversation. And Marielle has commented a number of times that to people in Manila, her Bisayan accent sounds harsh and even angry at times. I should be there in a couple of weeks.. it'll be interesting!
(and I plan taking earplugs along for sleeping.. not that I really expect it to help.. even a ticking clock bugs me when I'm trying to get to sleep…:-D )
Hi dans – Ha ha…. a mixture of characters from different dialects would make for an interesting plot!
Hi vicki – Ha ha… the other employees wanted peace and quiet. The Filipinos thought that it was already quiet! 😉
Hi Garryck – Ha ha.. there have been many times when Feyma and some of her family were involved in an involved conversation, and I interrupted and asked what was wrong… were they fighting? They all just laughed and went back to the chit chat!
Hi Bob
The advantages of living in the province the neiabor to the right is an sweet old couple in there kubo and nothing but green feilds on the other sides, i do here some Karoke sometimes, but that is one of the reasons that draws me to this place is family having a good time
and a simpler way of life.
Hi James – I'm not talking about people being mad and such that is noisy, I just mean in the course of regular conversation, they generally just speak quite loud! Ah, the joys! Ha ha… The karaoke…. that is a whole "nother" thing! 😉
when my wife speaks Cebuano she is so loud , on the phone or in person Cebuano's are loud! reminds me of when i grew up in my Italian neighborhood in new jersey same thing very loud!
Hi mike – Ha ha… maybe your wife is just trying to fit in with your friends from the Italian neighborhood!! 😀
Hi Bob! I found this topic quite amusing. It's true that filipinos can get really loud during a normal conversation. This only happen though when filipinos are within their friends/families or someone they already know. If you haven't found out yet, most of us, filipinos, are "jokesters" in front of our peers. We love to make funny stories out of our daily experiences. We can even make jokes while on a dead person's wake. In a big group, the volume get turned up when someone, tell a story which is even funnier than the last person's tale, and it goes on and on, till most people in the group get to say something. Of course, we laugh easily and in boisterous manner… this is a way to invite the other people to join in with the fun usually. It's true though, that filipinos are also soft-spoken and sort'a timid when we are with foriegners and people we don't know very well. I was that way when I came to America. One day , my work supervisor, just commented to me on how I speak so softly. She proceeded to ask me if I wasn't sure about to do about my job or I needed help with anything. Of course I was fine, and was just reserved as I'm not that close to my coworkers yet. From then on, I decided to speak up more and with a louder voice. I passed this on to my family back home. I always encourage my nieces and nephew to speak up and speak with a louder voice, as in America, they think you're dumb or have no opinion on things if you're timid. That's how I perceived it anyway (you probably have something to say 'bout this Bob from an American perspective). Now, Karaoke nite? That's every night in my neighborhood back in Iligan City. 🙂
Hello ann m – Thanks for visiting and commenting. Yes, I agree that Filipinos are really jokers, fun loving people! No doubt on that! Filipinos are no doubt a very jovial people!
Hi Bob
I have just thought of the 50th way to earn aliving in the phils hehehe, Wanna buy some ear defenders?
Hi Dave – You are going to make a bundle!!! 🙂
hi bob –not loud –just happy
Hi james – I agree that Filipinos are a very happy people! 😀 But, I disagree that they are not loud!
hi, bob. spanish people here are the same. they have this impression of filipinos to be soft-spoken, gentle, shy, reserved, etc. but when filipinos get together or they're talking with a fellow filipino, the tone andvintensity of the conversation changes. my spanish husband would ask if i was fighting with my mom when we were actually just talking. but i, sometimes make the same comment when he talks with a family member… i would say judging from the tone and intensity of your voices, anybody listening and who does not understand the language would think they're fighting. must be the paralinguistic phenomena in action, jeje.Filipinos, as individuals, normally avoid talking and laughing loudly especially in public places lest he be dubbed as rude and attention-seeker. But when the situation changes (eg, he's with very good friends) he could become loud, etc. this could also be an effect of his culture (i'm not referring to the nation's culture but his own culture and the culture his group has).
Hi ensueno – Thanks for your comment. Yeah, I understand how your husband feels, because I would often ask Feyma that question too! Ha ha.. Now, I kind of laugh thinking about it, because I guess I don't as her nearly as often as I used to.
We can be loud at times Bob, especially if the topic is interestingly fun and with humor. We are very expressive people when it comes to telling stories(esp.the hilarious one). I even find myself talking and laughing on top of my lungs on several ocassions. On a normal day i am the opposite. So yes, you are spot on in these subject lol.
Hi Vanessa – Ha ha… yep, thanks for your confirmation of my observation! It is interesting that Filipinos can, and are, on both ends of the noise scale. Sometimes very quiet and reserved, then suddenly very noisy! Makes life interesting!
Yes Bob your right when it comes to Filipino's being loud. I have to tell my son everyday to use his outside American voice and not his inside Filipino voice. His mother has taught him the art of Speaking loud in the house. It is hard for me to talk to her on the phone sometimes because to me she seems to be screaming in the phone.
New here but really like your blogs. I found this site while looking for ideas for our trip to the Philippines. Going to be going to Kidapawan for a wedding and I know nothing of the place. We are from Aparri. Almost the opposit side of the world.
Hi Steve – Thanks for visiting my site, and enjoy your visit to Kidapawan.
Personally I believe that they don’t consider anyone else around them.
That’s your belief then.
Think of it this way:
If a Filipino is shy and quiet around you: you are an outsider.
If a Filipino is boisterous and loud around you: you are accepted.
It’s similar to Japanese culture which are often stereotyped as being meek and shy in the west, when in reality they’re not. They only do that around ‘outsiders’ or in formal settings. They can be just as loud as Filipinos when they’re with peers (after all, they’re the two cultures which love karaoke the most). Try watching a Japanese TV show for example.