aaron2

Adjusting Here In The Philippines

NEW articles daily! Subscribe below to receive daily updates with our new articles!

Please enter your name.
Please enter a valid email address.
Something went wrong. Please check your entries and try again.

When Bob and I plan on moving here in the late 90’s, I was the one that’s leery about it beeing Bob and the kids never experience the lifestyle of living here in the Philippines. When I confided our plans on moving here to my Filipina friends they immediately say “Are you guys crazy” or “Are you guys out of your mind”. Most of my friends are fearful too upon knowing that we are moving back to Mindanao. As they say the war zone place. Hearing them say those lines, I was so scared for my family again.

When our moved finally happened in 2000. I felt emotionally mixed with excitement and fear. I was so excited to be here to be with my family and friends again that I left behind for a long time. The excitement was just shortlived. I was shocked that I did not adjusted well here and also our second child too, at that time he was 3 years old. His so close to Granny. Bob and our oldest son they did good here. After a month of living here in the Philippines I am already ready to head back to the States. I felt I don’t belong here anymore. Just seeing lots of my family and neighbors look so bad because they had no money to buy food. Seeing lots of kids in the street breaks my heart. I can’t stand it. Before we came here we decided to lived close to my family, later I found out that was a big mistake. No privacy in the house, they will just stop by our house unannouce. I would really get mad. I would have understand it if they didn’t have phone, that’s one thing I notice here every family has cell phone. They think then I am better than them, which i don’t.

BizzzBuddy - The Business that works while you sleep

Some people also thinks since we just came from the States we brought a ton of money. They will sell all kinds of stuff to us. Some they would like to borrow money. I got tired of it. Finally, what stopping them in coming to us for stuff, before they could even tell me I already  told them that Bob and I don’t have money. I guess, they got the message eversince I didn’t hear anybody asking then. Sometime, here you have to be tough(in a nice way) so that they will know what you want. You guys will know what I am saying when time comes for you to move here, taking vacation is different than living here.

Thank you everybody for the warm welcome.

Posted in

Feyma

Feyma Martin is a Columnist here on the Live in the Philippines Web Magazine, she is the wife of site Publisher, Bob Martin. Feyma is originally from the Philippines, but went to the USA for 10 years after marrying Bob in 1990. Bob & Feyma moved to the Philippines to live permanently in 2000.

Most Shared Posts

15
Leave a Reply

avatar
13 Comment threads
1 Thread replies
0 Followers
 
Most reacted comment
Hottest comment thread
11 Comment authors
GeriMurrayMindanaoBobRon Wattsjul Recent comment authors
  Subscribe  
newest oldest most voted
Notify of
Liklik
Guest
Liklik

Hi Feyma,

I'm Liklik, Bill Paul's wife. Bill wrote to you a couple of days ago. I understand what you mean about some people in the Philippines thinking we have tons of money if we've been in America. I think it stems from some Filipinos who visit the Philippines. They spend money like they grow on trees here in America.When I made my first visit back in Cebu after 6 years here in the US, they thought I am so poor here in the US because I just stayed home with my family and enjoy them.

Liklik

jul
Guest
jul

Keep writing, Feyma. I truly appreciate your sincerity and honesty in this regard. Best regards.

Peter Bennett
Guest

Hello Feyma, my name is Peter and my wife is Gina, we are from London/Bacolod City, we live in the UK and I am happy to have made a friend online from your husband Bob, we are in communication about life there, I read your thoughts to my wife and she said oh "That is typical and sounds right" she said, that may happen to us, but she assured me that she will not allow her family to put pressure on me, but I did say, i thought that living there, is not the same as being on vacation, so… Read more »

Letty
Guest
Letty

Hi Feyma,

I like your message. I wish to have an interaction with you in the future. Your husband is doing a great job. I admire your courage. You are inspiring me. Thank you. More power.

Feyma
Guest

Hi Liklik, It's difficult to explain to people when they don't understand what we are talking about. If ever we said we don't have money, they just would not believe it. Even if you didn't have job in the States as long as you're from America and your husband is white it's automatic for them that you are RICH. It's really amazing how filipinos thinks sometimes. Hi Jul, Thank you so much for your nice comment. Hi Peter and Gina, I hope to see you guys soon living here in the Philippines. Maybe you guys might end up living here… Read more »

Liklik
Guest
Liklik

Hi Feyma, I know. For years I have tried to understand how we (as Filipino) think. I learned that there's nothing we can do to change how they(some Filipinos who haven't been anywhere but in the Philippines) think and us who's been on the other side think. But it's great that you have adjusted well. I just remembered, I had a very close friend from Davao when I was in highschool. I went to the University of San Carlos school for girls and we lost contact when I went to college. She went to a different university and I stayed… Read more »

MindanaoBob
Guest

Hi Malcolm – Thanks for your tips. I think that you and I are of the same mind!

Ross
Guest
Ross

That was a nice precaution. When I retire to the Phil on or about the end of 2007 I will be firm with my – " I DON'T HAVE MONEY"……… One major reason that I will retire in the Phil is to stretch our retirement dollar. I will go back to my hometown in Laguna. We will visit Panabo, Davao. One of our friends here in the states will go back there and we will have a chance of seeing Davao. We heard Davao is a beautiful city. Hope to see you in the future.

Feyma
Guest

Hi Liklik,
I hope you find your bestfriend in highschool. Goodluck to you.

Hi Ross,
It would be wise for you to spend your retirement here, much cheaper to live here. I've never been to Laguna, but heard from people they said it's nice there. If you happen to come to Panabo to visit your friend maybe we could meet up then.

Marilou
Guest
Marilou

Hi Feyma, as I mentioned in my other post, Jim and I are retiring back in Bukidnon next year. Jim is so excited but I've got mixed feelings. Like you said, coming for holidays is not the same as living there. I'm not worried about safety because I think it's quite safe where we are but I'm apprehensive about fitting back into my family, friends and the community. I've been away for over 20 years and the town has changed and a lot of people I once knew have moved away and new people have moved in. We built our… Read more »

MindanaoBob
Guest

Hi Vicki – Thank you for visiting my site! I appreciate it very much.

You really pointed out one good reason to learn a language (especially if you live in the area) you can understand what everybody is saying, and they can't take advantage of you. That is a definite plus in learning! But, the more fun part of it is being able to mix more readily with the local people.

Come back and visit again! You are most welcome here!

Feyma
Guest

Hi Marilou,
I understand your uneasiness in moving back here. With regards to friends and family I tell you it's not easy for me to be with them. I'm not talking bad about them, it's just that I'm not that little girl anymore that they used to know when I came back. I had different outlook in life now than they do.

John Miele
Guest
John Miele

Rebecca: Thank you!

MindanaoBob
Guest

Hi Danny – Ha ha… I'm gonna leave the Cherry Coke franchise to Henry! He deserves to find a product to sell too! Maybe all the foreigners will buy from him! I am happy drinking either iced tea (home brewed) or specialty coffee that I roast myself.

SIGN UP TO JOIN OUR GIVEAWAYS & INFO NEWSLETTER

Make sure you've signed up to our newsletter to get exclusive newsletter only content! Also be updated about all our important events and other important info that our readers rely on.

SIGNUP FORM


Something went wrong. Please check your entries and try again.