In my time of living here in the Philippines, I have met and know a lot of ex-pats here. I know people from countries all over the world – USA, Australia, all over Europe, the Middle East, even Africa – who live here. In meeting and talking with such foreign friends, one topic that always seems to come up sooner or later is traveling back “home” – where you came from. It’s inevitable that the subject will come up.
I know ex-pats here who travel home 3 or 4 times per year, they spend about an equal amount of time at home as they do here in their new home. I know ex-pats who go back once per year, and I know others who go home every 2 or 3 years. So far, though, I haven’t met anybody else like me… I have been here 8 years now, and I have yet to go home. Actually, let me change my wording on that… I have yet to go back to the States. I consider Davao to be my home. But, you know what I mean, right?
Other ex-pats are always surprised when I tell them that I haven’t gone back to the States. They ask why. I tell them that I have no reason or explanation on why I don’t go back, I just have no need or desire to do so. Really and honestly, there is nothing there that is calling me back. In regards to seeing family, I don’t have much close family remaining. My father died in 1992. I had a younger sister who died in 1979. I have one brother, but we are not close. My mother is still alive, and she comes here to see us in Davao on a regular basis. So, my mother is about the only close family I have in the States, but I see her regularly anyway. I don’t really have a business or any kind of job that would bring me back to the States (some of my Internet businesses are US based, but I can do that all through the Internet anyway). So, what would bring me back to the States?
I do have a plan to go back to the States for a vacation sometime in the next few years, though. You see, my youngest son, Jared, was only one month old when we moved here, so he does not remember the States. I feel that we should bring him back so that he can have a glimpse at his heritage on my side of the family. Maybe we’ll bring the kids to Disneyland or something like that. But, beyond that, I just can’t think of anything that makes me want to go back again!
How about you? If you lived here, how often do you think you would go back? If you do live here already, what has been your practice? I’d be interested to hear!
Hello Bob, I think this one is best answered by those who live there permanently, but the semi residence appeals to me, if only out of a desire not to "Let go" of the security and safety ones own country offers, you have proved to all of us that hanging on to the chains of the western world is not required and that is to be commended. The fact that you havent been back to the U.S.A. (I not the preference for Davao as home) tells us that home is where you make your bed, you've certainly showed us the way, would I g o home, the answer is, once I have acculturalized further as you have done, the answer is no ! although in the first intance, I would probably come backwards and forwards to support my activities in making a living as other people you have mentioned.
I think everyone will be different on this one, some will want to go back to the mother country shall we say, and others will not feel the need, I guess its very much a personal thing, interesting article Bob as always.
Hello Bob,
I agree with Peter and think that nobody is alike on this one, personnaly, I plan to go there for 6 months and come back 6 months and do so for about 2 years, the time to settle our business in the Philippines and after that I will probaly be like you and stay permanently there. My family and friends will visit me there anyway so why come back? I may change my mind when there but for now that's my plan…
Hi Bob, I feel strongly that I would return to the US once a year for a couple of months. Most likely from November to sometime in January. That is something Marlou and I have discussed many times and I am comfortablei with that plan for us. I am moving there for the cost of living and pace of the life style but I am not forgetting who I am. I have a lot of family here in the US so that is a large reason. Hope that helps for others. Talk with you soon. Ron
Hello Bob,
In answer to your query, once I decide to move to the Philippines I will not return to the United States.
I married a woman from Dipolog City last November 28 and she is now in the process of immigrating here. Our plans are to return to Mindanao permanently within the next three years where we plan to start a family and raise our children. I traveled there three times during 2006 and fell in love with the land, culture and lifestyle and really do want to make it my home permanently.
I would like to add that these thoughts are based on knowledge and wisdom… and not from a simple romance or infatuation with an exotic land.
Sincerely,
William
Hi Peter – I would predict that by making regular trips home, you would put off the acculturization here by a long ways. Just my guess. Nothing wrong with that, it's a personal choice.
Hi Patrice – Nothing wrong with being a "snowbird" and spending those cold Canadian months on the warm beaches of the Philippines! Oops… not many beaches in Valencia, right?
Hi Ron – With having family back in the USA there is a reason to go back, and I understand that. If you plan to bring Marlou on those regular trips, though, you will experience problems with her entry. She won't qualify for a green card because she won't spend enough time there. Best bet is either to get her a 10 year multiple entry visa (if they will issue her one), or – as we discussed when you were here – let her move there for 5 years or so so that she can become a US Citizen, then both of you move back here. With that, she (and you) will be able to travel back and forth at will.
Hi William – It sounds like you are like me when it comes to living in one place or the other, as opposed to "living in both places" simultaneously.
I just had one thing you may want to consider – If your wife is coming to the States for 3 years or so, you might want to make it a little longer. I believe that after 3 years living there she will be eligible for Citizenship. It is longer for most, but as the wife of a citizen she gets a little break on the timing. It would be advantageous for her to stay just a little longer so that she can obtain US Citizenship.
Good luck to you!
Peter probably hit the bullseye with his post on why people come back to one's own country. It's the inability not to let go of the safety and security mindset that one has grow accustom to. It's like growing up Catholic most of your life and then converting to other religion. You know the conversion was necessary, but the slight guilt and self-consciousness you feel keeps you from completely severing your ties with your former religion.
Having been born and spending the pre-teen part of my life in the Philippines, and spending the most of my teenage and young adult life in the states, I felt somewhat torn between two places. It's like being torn between two lovers or caught between a rock and a hard place. The Philippines opened my eyes to my people and culture, whereas the United states opened me to material opportunities that I wouldn't have gotten if I had stayed in the Philippines. Both countries have their own positive and negative sides.
But the driving forces that keeps bringing me back to the Philippines, goes beyond material gains, as I had mentioned in my other post. There comes a time when you say to yourself, 'I have to get out of the rat race' and start living life that way it should be lived. One day at a time. Not only on weekends after a whole week of working hard (work hard; play hard); not when my family and I take that 3 days cruise to the Bahamas or a weekend in Disneyworld; not when I play to swing the club and play 18 holes everyday after I retire. That's not living. That's waiting to live a life after you do all those things that your job and society demands. That's making a living so you can live.
Granted, the Philippines is not perfect. There are many thing here that will disappoint, irritate, and even disgust you. But given that fact, I've never seen more happy friendly faces and a zest for life in this poverty stricken country than most materially wealthy countries in the world. You can actually count, enjoy, and remember the days of your life here instead of just watching life zip by because you're too busy of getting caught up in life. Till next time….
Hi Bob,
You're right..no beach in Valencia. But I'm not a "beach guy" anyway and there is some spring around the city that help to cool off a bit. Snowbird yes but for only a couple of years..after that I'll cut the two wings ha ha ha.
Thank you Julius, also everyone else who contributed to this discussion, I just tried to be honest, I mean take today, the weather is hot here, and when its nice and hot in UK, you tend to forget all the bad things about the country that you are wanting to escape from, of course when its raining hard, freezing cold and you look at your lifestyle, naturally its easy to look East, I am trying to imagine myself contented in the Philippines running one or two businesses, and taking life easy, will it be that way ? I dont know ! will it be a better life for me ? who is to say ? I know what I have got in UK, when I make money here, I make lots of it, its like all businesses for the self employed, when its great, its really great and youre riding high above the clouds, when its crap..lets be honest, we would rather be somewhere else, I just know that here I have safety and security, in the Philippines, I just know I will be a babe in the woods, I have a lot to learn, and a new life to prepare for, but I am willing to do it, what I like about Bob is that he has made his decision and he has made it work, I wonder though if we all have what it takes to be Bob ? only time will tell.
Hi Bob, I just read your comments and thank you. Marlou and I have decided that we would live in the US for two year to get her green card and then we return to Davao. I have checked with USCIS and they have told me that she has to return to US soil once every six months to maintain her green card. I asked if that meant the US or any US territory and I was told if her passport is stamped its good. I have always planned on going to Guam every couple of months for medical reasons mostly prescription drugs from the VA and I think Guam stamps the passport so I am hoping that solves that issue. If not we will adjust. I can tell you that there is not going to be any five year period. I promised Marlou two years and I will honor my word to her. If left to me my last day of class is May 25th and I would be gone on May 26th-retired to Davao. Hope all is well. I have no idea when I will next be in Davao but Hanoi and Claude's are on my brain. Take care, Ron
well said, julius. I feel the same way. I also am in an opposite situation and feel torn about living in the States or moving back home. I can safetly say though after a decade away, I still can't seem to call this country home. Familiar and comfortable, sure but I keep looking to the Philippines. That "escaping the rat race" argument. Still, there are life experiences you can't get living in one place. I'm still trying to see new things in the world.
There are pros and cons. You know the saying "Once you leave, you can never go back home" (did I get that right?). Whenever I go back, I see things are different. Relationships with family and friends change, fade or disappear. This is expected. But I am glad that Davao still feels "right." My wife and I feel more relaxed there. We'll be moving back some day, it's only a matter of time now.
Peter. Thank you for being honest and I understand where you're coming from on your question whether or not you'll be o.k. in the Philippines. But there's only one way to find out. Just like the Nike shoes motto: "Just Do It". It will answer the million questions in your mind once you've given yourself the chance to "Just Do It".
I think where most people become disappointed after trying the life here, just like what happened to us in 1994-96, is we were financially, emotionally, and mentally unprepared. We were not careful with our money and trusted anyone with a pretty smile on their faces and sweet words out of their mouth. To say the least, we were almost taken to the cleaners. There was no one to show or taught us how to do it right. If Bob Martin's blog and the good people's advices were around back then, I could have picked a lot of vital tools to arm me with the kind of life I'd be faced with. Instead we just went with gut instinct, and somewhat survived for two years before we finally exhausted the coffer and had no choice but to go back to the states, vowing to give it a go again someday.
Well, almost ten years later, we're doing it again. We're much smarter and experienced and know how to do it right. Forums like "Live in the Philippines" a good tool for helping someone like yourself and others who aspire to move and live here. Heck, I don't mind contributing my two bits of advice into it as well. I hope I could be of help to someone who are faced with the similar situation(s) we've had. In fact, aspiring and current Philippines transplants are better off now than they were a few years ago. This "Live in the Philippines" blog is like having a big brother/sister holding you by the hand to teach and show you how to make it in this country.
And for goodness sake, stay away from negative forums about the Philippines. I'm talking about people (mostly expats) who created and contributed on these Phlippine forums and who are highly critical and cynical about life in the Philippines, yet they are spending the rest of their lives in their host First and Second World Countries. I've even contributed post about moving/living in the Philippines in these forums, and all I've gotten back are questions like "why do you want to do a thing like that for?" They see my post to entertain the idea of moving back to the Philippines as being ridiculous. They're the same people who will readily tell you what's wrong with the Philippines and what should be done about it, yet won't lift a finger to do anything, because they're thousands of miles away living a life of comfort and false sense of security. I used to call them PLDT (no pun intended to the Philippine telephone company). My acronym stood for Philippine Long Distant Therapist. All these long distant therapists do is give "lip service" on what wrong with the Philippines and how to fix those problems.
I have more respect for people like Bob Martin, and other foreigners, who were not detered to move here, than expats who knew this country better yet have tunred their her back on her. It's ashame to know that there are millions of Filipinos outside of the Philippines now and only a small percentage have decided to move back. Freddie Aguilar (a popular folk singer in the 70's and 80's) composed a song titled "Ako'y Isang Pinoy" (I'm a Filipino). One of the verse on that song went something like this, "ang hindi marunong magmahal sa sariling bayan, ay higit pa ang amoy sa mabahong isda". (those who don't know how to love one's own land, his odor is much worse than a rotten fish). Till next time….
Hi Peter and Julius – thanks for your thought provoking comments. Peter, you can make it work, you just have to allocate time and effort. Julius, you are exactly correct about the forums and the ex-pats who live here but constantly criticize everything about the place! I don't like being around people like that. I have been like that myself in the past, but made a conscience decision that it was not a good way to be, and I changed my attitude. I am the better for it.
Hi Ron – do a little more checking on that green card issue. It is my understanding that if she just goes in once every six months, it won't take long and her green card will be pulled. If she goes out for six months once or twice, no problem, but if it is a pattern where she just comes back once every six months they will catch on, and they will pull the green card. Also, I just wanted to let you know that there is a VA office in Manila, and you can get Medications there too… just in case you didn't know about that.
Hi Macky – I predict that I'll be seeing you within the next 5 years! 😉
Julius and Bob thanks for the encouragement, Julius can you expand some more on what you said in your post about "We were not careful with our money and trusted anyone with a pretty smile on their faces and sweet words out of their mouth." your experiences would help many I have no doubt, I was always told, was it you Bob ? that your Filipino wife is your best asset !, they serve as a protection for us White boys being talked into parting with our money, my wife is so protective of me, when it comes to our money, you know how it is guys.
If you ever remember the Barings trader Nicholas Leeson who brought down one of Britains oldest financial institutions, the banks chairman said, "he couldnt beleive how easy it was to make money" in fact Nick Leeson counter acted that by saying actually "It was quite hard to make money" I would back that up by saying, that in the West we may appear rich and well off, so when we show up in the Philippines we appear wealthy, but lets all be honest, we have to work hard for that money we bring, and we save up for months just to go back on a well earned vacation, Julius and Bob I would be happy to hear your experiences when you first arrived, and how easy it appears you are parted from your money.
Bob you made a post originally in your blog about living in close proximity to family ? would you say that is also a significant factor ! Julius, can you give a few examples of how sweet smiling mouths came around…I think this kind of information is invaluable to others like myself, I have not as yet experienced this when I am in the Philippines as my wife's family never come around, or if they do, they are kept well away from me, or it appears that way ! I once my wife talking to my brother in law, I got the feeling she was reading him the riot act, although I will never be sure, she never really told me what was said, but I had my suspicions, only later did she volunteer what was said.
One day it just came out, I asked her what was said, she told me this "My brother was saying that now we are married, can we help with his business" my wife said "I told him, that to forget any ideas of that, as we were trying to buy our own house, and that money does not grow on trees in the west, and don't bother my husband about money, as he does not undestand our culture" there again I think my wife was acting like the star wars missile system, hehehehehehe
Anyone else have a comment or experienced similar.
Hi Peter – Feyma and I have a little saying. "You can't help everybody". If you tried to help everybody here who legitimately needed your help you would go broke in short order and have to hit the plane back to the UK to earn more money. It's that simple. I know it seems callous, and I don't like it myself when I see a young child who obviously needs my help. I do help many, but I also know that you can't help them all. My number one priority is to provide for my family, and that is to be remembered. I do my best to help others, but must keep it within reason.
On top of all that…. like I said, there are many who legitimately need help. There are also a LOT of folks who don't need it so much, but try to get it out of you in ways that are not right.
Always be on the lookout.
Well said, Bob. Peter, your guess is right about my comment about the pretty smiles and sweet words out o their mouth. That's exactly whata it is. Bob, you're right. We can't help everybody here. You help one family member, friend, and even strangers, there'll be more waiting at your doorstep the next day. You'll become the new found savior in your little circle. Soon everyone will be competing for your generosity. But there's that old saying, "you can't please everybody". You help one and you don't help the other, your name is Mudd, and you'll feel guilty. You don't don't help anyone, you're name is still Mudd, and you'll still feel slightly guilty for a little while, but the good thing is, you have your money. Now which one would you go with?
Filipinos whether here in the Philippines or abroad are good at going with the flow. They don't make good leaders (as we already know), but they make a heck of good followers (as we already know, as well) They know when to vow down, say the right thing, and act as Romans when in Rome, I believe the famous saying was. In other words, they don't like breaking the status quo. That's what makes them one of the best sought after workers anywhere in the world. I called them the social Cassanovas of the world. They know how to work on your mind and hearts by doing little things that most people would take for granted. They know how to master the art of surrendering and playing the fool if the moments calls for it. You see, we Westerners (I'm partly one because I grow up in the U.S.) tend to teem with pride for our country and way of life. That's why we're such easy target for the social cassanovas of the world. We're so high up on the pedestal that we fail to realize that the legs that the pedestals are on, are being slowly eaten away by termites (social cassanovas).
We have to play guerrillas when it comes to dealing with Filipinos here. Let's not let them know that we have money (that creates envy and makes you an easy target for cons or something much worse), we have to let them know that we can play the mirror effect on them (mimic their actions, words, and even thoughts), and play the fool (we're not much smarter or better than them), and that will take the attention off of you and onto someone else. I didn't do that back in 1994-96. I was confident, self-assured, and thought of myself as being financially better off because of how dollar I had in my pockets. Little did I know that I was already being eaten away by termites around me. Till next time….
To add to my last post, Peter. If you do all those things I said above, you'll be able to mix right in without attracting too much attention to yourself. Life with be more bearable and simple. Till next time….
How does one help his filipina wife overcome the concern about "being the have" around so many (family inculded) who do not? Excellent topic
Thank you Bob, and thank you Julius for those excellent insights, I have to say I have also seen it myself, naturally one does feel slightly guilty about the situation of people, in line with your comments Julius, I have also noted, that enmity is very much displayed if you offer to be generous to one or two family members, and then "YOU" forget other cousins, I became the victim of this last year, when I wanted to help 2 of my wife's close cousins, sponsoring them to go on a trip to Boracay, remembering of course that I had only met the "TWO" cousins, I was totally ignorant of the fact that there were cousins in the family as pebbles on a beach !
When I remitted some money for the two cousins to go on a trip, I was then shocked to find, that it caused a family row, because there were so many more that were in need !, I MADE A MISTAKE ! I think I was seen as kuripot and not wanting to help others, so in line with Julius's comments, and yours Bob, ever heard the phrase "Damned if you do, and Damned if you don't, the only protection that seems to work for me is my Filipino wife's excellent advice which is "When it comes to matters within a Filipino family – dont get involved, dont offer to do anything, dont offer to help" in short " Leave it all to me, and that has been very good advice.
Hi Peter – this issue of others in the family getting upset if you help person A but not person B is certainly true. I feel that I have a perfect solution for this. I know it works for me. Stand by over the next day or two, I will make a new blog post about how I handle this situation.
Mitch, just play the game of the have not, even if you have. I know the people around will say they don't believe it. But you know what, they can't prove what they accuse you of if you don't show. Donald Trump won't survive in the Philippines. He likes to flaunt it. The reason he's o.k. in the states is because most people have their basic needs provided. It's the opposite in the Philippines. The more you flaunt what you have, the easier target you become. So downplay your blessing as much as possible, and you'll be left alone. Till next time….
Bob, cant wait to read it, I am wait with anticipation.
Personally I come back to the U.K for business purposes only …. one thing ive learned about phil' is ok my standard of living in the uk can be higher …. but my god it doesnt even scratch the surface of my quality of life in Davao. I've lived in nebraska too …. it just doesnt compete
I agree Alf – If you have money, the quality of life in the Philippines is great. I especially find this true in Davao!
This is a great site for information. My wife and I plan to move back to most likely Manila after her US citizenship. We will be living in Philippines for about 6 months at a time. How do I find out about travel visas for my wife? We plan a wedding in Philippines for her family we were married in the US already. Basicly I want to travel with my wife to the Philippines for one or two weeks at a time till Us citizenship (5yrs).
Hi Michael – Thanks for visiting my blog! I am a little unsure on your question. I am assuming that your wife is a Philippine Citizen, right? Where do you want her to travel to? She would not need a visa to come to the Philippines, sine she is a citizen. By reading your statement, I believe that she is already in the USA? Let me know where she is a citizen of, and where she wants to travel, and I will answer your question, if I can.
what about friends?
Hi max – I have a few close friends back in the States. We keep in touch with each other over the phone, through e-mail and such. A few of my friends and family have actually come here to the Philippines. Perhaps someday I will return to the States to visit friends, but it is not a priority to me. I can keep in touch through these other ways, and Davao is my home. I suspect it always will be.
Hi Bob- There is an old saying "Home is where the heart is". In saying that many things can happen in life to dictate what our hearts and minds tell us to do. In your case your immeadiate family comes before all and in my opinion rightly so. For some people who have married again in life it may be the first family has equal rights to parental share. Also parents who are unable to travel to their childrens new homeland have an influence on what one does in respect of traveling home again and how requently that happens.I don't think there is a easy answer to your question Bob as everyones circumstances is diffrent thats what really determines how little or often they may travel back home.
Hi Bob
I moved here almost 2 years ago with one thought in mind…..I will live here with my wife child(ren) forever.
I communicated with my wife for more than 4 years before I came here to marry. In that time I spent a very great deal of time researching the country, it's customs and traditions. I came here with a lot of knowledge and, was totally prepared to stay. I made no escape plans.
We have discussed returning to the US but, have both come to the decision that it's "not a big deal". If there were any plausable advantage for my wife to have US citizenship, I might consider going for the require 2 years but, we don't see any. My son is a US citizen already, and will be officially when we register the birth with the US embassy as soon as we think he is ready for the trip to Cebu.
I had met many Philipinnos in the US and I would always hear, from them, in the course of conversation, "I wish I was back in the Philippines". I won't have to hear that from my wife! We are both very happy here in Zamboanga del Sur and it is our home.
It is a personal thing that everyone will have a different feeling about, I'm sure but for me……….I'm here to stay.
Hi Jim – I agree with you that every person's circumstances are different. That's what makes us all different, and makes the world interesting! Luckily for me, I have no previous marriages or kids from other women, Feyma is my one and only wife, so all of that is not an issue for me, and I'm thankful for that.
Hi frank – I think that there are some advantages to getting US Citizenship. I know that Feyma is thankful that she got it. But, as I said in my comment to Jim, we are all different, and there is nothing wrong with that! Good luck to you and your wife, Frank!
hello , when i retired , next year , we plan to live in iligan city.
And i think . that we will not often go visit the Netherlands.
Maybe every 5 year.
what we planned so far is , to go visit other places in Asia.
And the rice terrasses Banao , and Bohol [ chocolate hills ]
maybe thailand and singapore.
Because the 25 years i,m married my wife,
6 times we visit , and always iligan.
And now i want to see other parts of the country.
Hi Bob, We will wait until shes a citizen to put our plans into place We are fortunate that five (5) years is not required. Marlou only has to be here three (3) years of which she already has a few months in the bank on that issue. I do have a question for you regarding passports and citizenship. You mentioned your son was very young when you moved there-is he a U.S. Citizen as is his right or is he dual as is also his right Thats something I am trying to learn with Marlou being pregnant. Ron
Julius (Bobs new blog format gives me a chance to reply specifically to your point here about negative expat views)
please realise that many really horrendous "foreigners" that Philippine people meet in the Phils are looser characters who are runnning away from real life in their own country
i have met many myself who are a complete embarssment to themselves and their country, please try and recognise them as suchpeople.
apologies on their behalf for the impression they give but i suppose the problem is with us because peole associate them with us ooops
all the best you Julius, i enjoyed your blogs on Bobs format hope you carry on
very best regards
Good post and thought-provoking comments. As far as travel, Mita and I do not intend to go to the US very often. becuase life is what happens when you are busy planning other things, turns out we will be going to the US for a breif visit later this year … but that is more for legal and business reasosn than any desire to do so. Our future plans include traveling throughout Asia, Australia … never been there … and especially Europe. I have no desire to return to the US for tourism/personal reasons for some time to come.
RE: the ability to come and go: You brought up an interesting point, Bob, that I see many people runnning afoul of: "Hi Ron – do a little more checking on that green card issue. It is my understanding that if she just goes in once every six months, it won’t take long and her green card will be pulled."… Ron appears to be doing the only thing currently viable … waiitng for his wife's citizenship. Sad to say it make take more thna 5 years, even with submitting every piece of paper at dealine … but it will take what it takes. One ca _not_ use a green card to travel back and forth indefinitely. The INS's own rules are very clear that green card is _not_ a multi-entry US visa. Thye do watch for this and they do yank green cards … this can be done soley at the whim of an INS officer and the immigrnat has no rights … such as court injunctions, etc. within the US … they can only appeal from outside the US … so it is not a matter to leave to chance.
For those who can't/won't wait out the 3 plus years US citizenship will take it may make more sense for the wife to obtain a 10 year multi-entry US visa and not even bother with Green card issues. if a couple is legally married and firmly established in the Philippines this is certainly a possibility … although in Mita and my case we felt the future advantages of US citizenship made the wait worthwhile.
Hi Dave Starr – Yes indeed, I agree with you fully about the whole "green card issue." My best advice would be to let your wife live in the USA long enough to get her citizenship, then move. With the citizenship, she is always free to come and go as often as she likes, and she can stay away for as long as she likes and can never be denied entry again.
Hi Dave Starr — My wife and I hold green cards and have travelled outside the country many times (Europe and Asia). We've also stayed for several months in Davao in various trips (not more than six, of course). Never having any trouble with re-entry or raising any questions. My sister (before she received her US citizenship). We did make sure however that we were within the rules of Homeland Security (INS doesn't exist anymore) every time we went on an extended trip.
But your explanation makes sense too. It's also a good thing that we have now applied for US citizenship (then dual citizenship thereafter).
Hi macky – I do know that what Dave was talking about can indeed happen. Luckily it worked out for you, but a green card holder can indeed be denied entry if they spend too much time away from the country.
Hi Bob and everyone. This is quite interesting. Of course, I'm not sure what the future may hold because I'm not in the Philippines yet. My wife and I hope that some day in the not so distant future we may move there and have a life style.Right now for us it is not possible considering the "rat race" that we are in. So you may know, we live here in the "land of opportunity" as they call it in the good ole USA. They say that "whatever the mind can conceive it can achieve". Its been tough for us and I guess as a man I have not delivered. You know I just turned 50 this past February and its a number that can definitely shake the reality into you. I say to myself many times I wish I would have done things right a long time ago. But, getting back to the subject of "Going home" If I had the financial resources I would say yes. I do have family, my kids. Most of them are grown. Here are their ages, 6,17,21,25, and 28. And yes Julius, if you're reading this I'm caught between a rock and a hard place. I've always had the problem with decisiveness and I have to kick myself sometime. Right now it is a fantasy to move to the Philippines and make a change. This is the key. I once read a book entitled "You can excel in times of change". I guess I could read all the motivational books too but unless I put off procrastination and take action nothing will happen. Everyday my wife and I say that oh when we win the lottery or when this or when that. So in closing, I'd like to say that my hat is off to each and everyone of you that have taken action to keep going in your drive and success. What is your secret? Please forgive me for getting off track. Thanks, Tony
Hi Tony – Think more positively! Honestly, nobody is perfect, and I think that all of us had bigger plans than what we have achieved in our lives. That is only nature. The big key is – you are ONLY 50 years old! That is still young, and you still have plenty of time to achieve the things that you are dreaming about. There is only one key, though – you will never do it by just thinking about it! Think about what steps you would need to take to achieve your goals, and start taking small steps each day! One small step at a time, no job is too big.
Hi Bob, this has certainly made me think "where is home?" Is it here where we physically are? or is it Canada where we draw our earnings from and where we are considered citizen/immigrant, and are protected by the country? Can we call Philippines our home, but in case of trouble, we can quickly go back to Canada? This also reminded me of a German cruiser who criticized every country he'd sailed to and compared everything to how much better Germany is and that he will never be a citizen of another country. I recall asking him why, if Germany is so good, he has never returned and is forever extending his tourist visa in NZ?
We've left Canada on an extended sailing adventure and have been to several countries in the Pacific for the past 6 years (now here in Samal). No matter where we are, we call our boat "home" just to simplify things. We still don't know where we will end up – so home is where we are most happy – and that is our sailboat.
As far as returning "home" – I have been visiting Philippines almost every year and also to Canada and to Norway. Our boat is tied safely somewhere and we fly to our other home(s) – because we have families there, and in the end, families are what counts.
Re our American cruiser friends – we have heard one losing his green card status and another one was in trouble renewing it. Both were married to US citizens. I don't really know the particulars on why that happened. In Canada, as long as you are living with your Canadian Spouse overseas, your immigrant status will not be taken away (for now).
As far as being asked for money, my husband walks around in torn t-shirts or worn out shorts. Whenever he is asked for money, he tells them he has no money and that his wife holds the wallet 😀
Hi Ellen – you have some good things to think about there. Regarding the German guy, I meet people like that here all the time. Just complain about everything, but they still stay here! It doesn't make any sense to me.
Regarding your American friends, if you're on a green card, that means you're supposed to reside there. If you leave the country for a few months. They consider the you're already not residing there and does your card is no longer valid, in most cases. Sometimes you can get away with just a warning, but in the end your card will be revoked, if you do this.
I go back to the states because I have to with my job in Alaska. However it's all part of a 5 year plan and after that I plan to retire at 40 (God willing). When I was in the states this last time, I found that I really felt like I was in a foreign country. My home is Davao now and for most of my trip I was homesick for the Philippines. I can say going back did not mess with my acculturation as I got back into the swing of Philippine living as soon as I returned. Up in Alaska it's kind of like being home anyhow as there are so many Philippine OFW's working in the cannery and they were very quick to accept me as one of their own. Spending time around them took the edge off of the homesickness I felt being away for so long.
Hi Bob,I agree with other replies, it all depends on personal circumstances.Personally,i would re -visit Uk every 2 or 3yrs as long as my mother is alive as she is 90,to old and not fit enough to visit Phils.Fortunately my sister and her family are always on hand for her.My immediate family are use to me living far away as i have not lived in my hometown since i was 16.If my mum was no longer with us i may only visit every 6 or 7yrs.As for you re- visiting USA,it may be wise to leave it a couple of years as the economy there as well as the Uk appear to be in financial meltdown at the moment,regards Chas.
A reply to #6.
The US Immigration Service's web site will fool you. My wife & I thought that because she had a K-3 visa she would become eligible to apply for citizenship after being here for 3 years. That is not so. After coming here and getting married, my wife applied for, and after an interview, she was issued a conditional permanent residence. After 2 more years we applied for removal on the conditional part, and after fees and another interview mt wife received her green card as an unconditional permanent resident. She then became eligible to apply for US Citizenship after 3 years of unconditional permanent residence. So the total is actually 5 years, which is still 2 years shorter than most.
Add to this mess, the fact that on the east coast, the waiting period between applying for citizenship and being scheduled an interview is now about a year and a half. My wife applied in March of this year, and they are currently working on applications filed in Feb. of 07 !
Hi Bob – Were it up to me, I'd just stay put in the Phils and try to beat your ever advancing record. Asawa-ko, however, wants annual visits with the anaks. All I can say is, "O-po, Ma'm!" 😆
We'll be "back home" in mid-November. Need to wrap up house construction, hold a house blessing (among the numerous parties that we'll most likely "have to" hold 😉 ) and complete all the legal and local stuff (tax appraisals & payments, etc.). Will also try to maintain a low "-ber month" presence, and sneek away before we experience Chreeeeesmas! 😆
Unfortunately, this trip will only be for about a month. 😥
Fortunately, it's financed by frequent flier miles. 🙂
Hi BrSpiritus – Sounds like you have a plan! Imagine, you felt homesick for the Philippines – as I recall, I think you had only lived here for like a year before that, right? I've been here for 8+ years, if I went back I'd probably feel that it was a different planet! 😆
Hi chas – the best time to visit may be when the economy is bad. For going places like Disneyland, there will be fewer visitors, less crowds and such!
Hi John – When Feyma applied for citizenship (on the West Coast) back in the mid-90's the wait was similar.
Hi Paul – Good luck with your trip!
Trust me Bob, it IS a different planet 😆 Truth be told, I never felt I had a "place" in US society, I'm too old fashioned. Over here on the other hand, I fit in.
BTW, we're eyeing a piece of land in Samal to build our home 😉
Hi BrSpiritus – If you have found a nice place on Samal – GO FOR IT! Trust me, you won't regret it!
My brother lives in Thailand , has for the last 6 years and has no desire to return…plans on returning in 7 1/2 years…when the statue of limitations runs out, but he loves it !!
Hi brian – I wish your brother well! I hope that he can make it until the statute of limitations expires! 😆
Hi Dan Mihaliak – Thanks for your interesting observations. Don’t worry, if we do decide to take the kids back to the States for a visit, there would be a lot more to it than just Disneyland, you can count on that.
Kamusta ka Bob,
This is hard for me to answer, but I guess I would like to be able to visit at least once after I move to Philippines. Especially soon after I am married here in Philippines, so my family can meet my new wife and child. Other than that..I don’t see myself going there often, I hope to be too busy in Philippines working and raising a family of my own to do anything else. If my mother will be up for the trip, then she can come over to the Philippines, as well as my brothers..but would be up to them..Other wise will just keep in contact with them through the telephone, and internet.
But in about 11 years from now, I would want to send Chesca there for college, or possibly there in Philippines. But I am guessing she would do better to go to an American college.
paalam,
Danny
Hi Danny – I can understand your thoughts and feelings. Certainly I can understand that you want your family in the USA to meet your new Philippine family, and I agree that it is a good thing too.
To Julius,
Like Peter has asked..I too would like to hear more about your first experiences in living there in Philippines. I mean..I am not asking you to go into detail, but what is it you did? or didn’t do right? Were you starting your own business or businesses, and or just made the wrong investments. I too am curious, but is up to you if you would like to share that with us.
I am planning on coming to the Philippines early next year, after getting all of my affairs settled here in the USA, and I hope to make Southern Leyte my home, and start up businesses there.
Salamat,
Danny
We have lived in Northern CA, Central Ca, Kansas City,Mo, Chicago, Ill.Silver Spring,MD, Pittsburgh, PA, Quezon City PI, Iloilo, PI and now retirimg in Mariduque. None of these places I am calling home, because I believe that home is not a place but in the Heart!
Hi David B Katague – That is a great thought, and I believe that you are correct.
Hi Bob
Great article, I am one of the ones who will try to return to the US at least once a year. it will be in the Fall/Winter as I enjoy college football and am a big fan.But when I get into real retirement age say 65 the trips to the states will be few and far between but like you I will call the Philippines my home. Now for one request, if you really would like to show your son who has never been to the US where he came from please pick somewhere other than disneyland. A story for you, a friend met his wife early in his career while stationed in Olongapo City. They had a child and he got trasnferred to to the states. He took his wife and child with him. About 12 years later he decided to take the now teenager back to show her where she came from and you know where they went, Olongapo City in the heyday of the military presence. Boy she learned alot about the Philippines and had some good stories to tell her friends and family what the Philippines was like. I'm afraid you son will think that Disneyland is a place that Americans go evey year when in fact some Americans never go and some only go once. I think Washington DC might be a better place but that's just my opinion.
To Danny
Comparing college life in the US to the Philippines it may be in your best interest to encourage your daughter to attend in the Philippines. I have one in a major University in the States so i can speak from what I’ve learned in my research. I found that there are really alot of distractions in US schools these days. US schools seem to be pushing some kind of agenda that focuses less on academics and more on socializing. Also a study done recently shows that attending a big time University doesn’t affect the salary of a college graduate even enough to make up for the extra tuition/expenses that occur by attending the famous University. IMHO the Philippines still stresses academics much more than a stateside school.
To Dan M.
Thanks for your comments, well that would be fine with me..if she was to want to study in the Philippines, and make a career, and stay in her home country. In the end, it will be up to Chesca , because of course at this time, I would have no idea what she would like to study.
I guess I was just thinking it would be better for her to get schooled in the USA, I haven’t really researched it too much, but its seems alot of the colleges here in the USA accept a lot of the credits from colleges abroad. For instance, I know that there are a lot of nursing schools there, and I am sure most are very good schools. But I have heard that some of the nurses that have graduated from some of those schools..and have come to USA and try to get nursing job. Not all hospitals will accept there certifications from the Philippines.
Salamat,
Danny
hey Bob ! Kumusta ! disneyWorld here in florida is advertizing free entry on your birthday ! and of course i know some great 3 bedroom condo’s in the magig kingdom area of disnet at bargain prices 😉 I think if we did move to the phills thats what i would miss the most, entertainment like theme parks but theres always adventure whereever you go 🙂
Hi Tommy – Yep, given your location, I’m pretty sure you are the guy who knows all the deals! 😆 You are right, there aren’t many theme parks over here, only one that I know of in the country, and I think that it is not that great from what I’ve heard.
Wow, Julius’ first post above (#7) is so eloquent and expresses my own feelings so perfectly about why I love the Philippines. He said it so very well that I’m writing down his thoughts so I can reflect on them every now and then!
– There comes a time when you say to yourself, ‘I have to get out of the rat race’ and start living life that way it should be lived. One day at a time.
– I’ve never seen more happy friendly faces and a zest for life in this poverty stricken country than most materially wealthy countries in the world. You can actually count, enjoy, and remember the days of your life here instead of just watching life zip by because you’re too busy of getting caught up in life.
Hi brian c (toronto) – Very nice comment, and I really agree with the things you said too!
well we have three propertys to pick from to live at in the philippines, 2 in tayud and one in mandaue, all we need is money to move and live there permanently . my wife wants to become a citizen 1st and we will make my son a dual citizen .but my wife wants to stay in america and i want to live in cebu there lies the problem in a couple years i will be vest in my pension and i am already vested in ss, and if we rent our house out here in the usa we could live off the money very easily !i want to open a martial arts place in cebu !and my wife is a school teacher! we have room on our propertys in tayud to open a motel or store or a string of stores ! gotta wait untill my wife becomes an american so we can move to the philippines hahaha!
Hi mike – I understand your considerations. I’ve been in your shoes before too!
Be careful about talking about having a “motel” – here in the Philippines the word motel refers to a seedy place – with rooms generally rented by the hour! 😆 As Dave Starr wrote about recently, we are two countries separated by a common language!
ok i will call it a pension or hotel .I am excited because one of our propertys over looks the ocean . I really dont want to be an old man when i move to the philippines .I will miss being a wrestling coach and my son probaly will be mad at me if he doesnt get to go to high school in america but the schools here are terrible no discipline or accountability and private schools in PI are very affordable. and my son can wrestle in the philippines and do judo and jujitsu and go to an affordable college in PI and if he wants to move back to the usa later on went he is finnished with college god bless him! the taxes are killing me on my house and they aint getting any cheaper .I live in a sub division and they tell you when to cut your grass dont park your car here dont put your garbage can there i am tired of all the nonsense. i just want to live my life peacefully in PI . eat some lechon baboy,drink my san miguel,go to the open market in the morning pick out my fresh vegetables and fish and play my stereo as loud as i want and listen to music untill i am ready to turn it off!
Hi mike – It sounds like you have a nice plan there! Good luck!
Been to the Phil. four times over the last 10 years. Found the girl i want to marry. I’m just a beginner at this ,instead of her coming to US can i stay full time in Phil. I love it there, am 55 just retired with a good pension.
Hi Robert Vinci- Absolutely – that is what this site is all about, “living in the Philippines.” You probably don’t qualify to get a resident visa right now, but after marriage you do. For now, you can come and stay up to two years on a tourist visa.
hi bob, i emailed you last week about me getting medications there in the philippines,i appreciate your reply. I got up this morning & felt like crap til i took my meds, i have to take pain meds for a herniated disc that is pinching on a nerve. went friday the 14th of nov to a neurosurgeon,he looked at my recent MRI & said as long as i took my meds & was doing ok, he didn’t think he would want to do surgery. i take hydrocodone 10mg 6 times a day,the generic for it is called lortabs, i also take valium for anxiety,and neurontin for nerve damage that the disc has caused,the generic for that is gabapentin, like i mentioned to you i was concerned about being able to get these meds in davo,i really would like to move there, if you could tell me if i can get these meds,i will take you & your wife out to the resturant of your choice. i draw $1700 a month from social security disability,i hope that is enough for me and my little dog SPANKY to live on. Is valencia as cool as i have read? I will probably want to live there in davao though. i enjoy the comments from your readers very much,and all the info you put out about the country,thanks again, Bobby
Hi bobby wallace- Glad you got my reply about the medications. I think that everything you need is probably available here.
Valencia is indeed quite a bit cooler, as it is up in the mountains. It’s a beautiful area. I enjoy visiting there, but prefer to live in the City, like you say.