I’ve been observing and hearing from others that a lot of the expats living here just could not make it. It is hard for them to adjust. They really want to bring with them the lifestyle and the way of life from the place where they are from and tried to apply to the people here. They wanted to bring the freedom of speech or whatever they have from the place they used to live and apply it to the millions of people here. Dude, it just doesn’t work that way. You can’t just bring with you everything where you’re from and try to influence the people here. If ever they want your way its good for you, if they don’t, don’t force them. You could end up in big trouble that way.
I’ve talked to a lot of Pinoys here and they said that “if any of the people (foreigners or a Filipino who lives or grow up in other countries) wanted to lived here, its okay, but always they would say don’t tell us what to do with our own country, we Pinoys did not go to the country of that foreigner and put a gun on his head and tell him to live here in the Philippines. That foreigner came here to live with his own free will. So he has no right to tell us what to do”. Wow, pretty big statement.
What can I say on that. I totally agree with the sentiments of the people here. When we decided to move here, we did not consult my family or the Philippine government for that matter. It’s just Bob and I talked about it. We had our share of big frustrations here but at the end Bob and I decided to go with the flow. It took us almost 5 years to fully get adjusted here. It was not easy, as we always says here on LiP. But we sure made a commitment before coming here to the Philippines to try to adjust ourselves within 5 years. If after 5 years we were not happy living here, then we have to leave the Philippines and go back to the States. But luckily Bob and I and the kids were totally liking it here. Especially Chris, to be totally honest, his one of the reason why we moved here. My family really is a big help for Chris. I’m really thankful to my family for being always there for him. He likes to stay on my parents farm. A few of my siblings live there and always welcome him to stay at their place. So it’s a big plus for us.
Geez, when we first moved here, I had my big shares of frustrations when it comes to time management. When we set a time meet up, it could be my family or somebody, they might shows up like 30 to an hour late. It really irritates me a lot before. Now I just try to do something while waiting. It’s totally different now. I have to adjust or else I’m going insane. Not really cool.
I will tell you a story: A friend of mine own a house that she wanted to be rented. She found a renter. On the first day that the renter moved in he already got in trouble with a few houses nearby, to those people that owned some dogs. The renter sent his girlfriend to tell those people that their dogs were so loud and please let the dogs be quiet. One of the neighbor got aggravated and told the girlfriend of the renter who are you to tell us what to do in our own household. A few days later one of the neighbor had some work done in his house and of course it would be loud on the sounds of the hammer and the drill, again he told his girlfriend to tell those people to be quiet. My friend told me “Oh God I wished I didn’t let him rent my place. He is really a headache”. They’ve been to the Barangay captain a few times in just a month. Finally my friend told her renter to just find another house for them to rent out. My friend’s been having other renter there before and she did not encounter too many problems like. Her renter just stayed 2 months there. After that my friend said that she will not rent to foreigners for the meantime. She’s happy with her renter now, a high up worker at one of the malls here.
Here’s another incident: I was buying something at SM a few weeks ago. And I was behind an older gentleman. I could tell he’s been living abroad and live back here, I think he is an OFW. In front of him another customer trying to buy something and she purchased something without a bar code to scan. The cashier then told her bagger to go to the aisle where that customer got the item and get the bar code for it. It took for that bagger way longer than we expected. My gosh, the older gentleman really told the customer what he thinks. He told the lady you are rude and inconsiderate of others, his going on and on. Why you just pay first what was ring by the cash register right now and pay that one item later when the bagger comes so that we can finished up here instead of standing here staring at the cashier. The lady that owned the item just ignore the old guy’s complain and just waiting for the bagger to returned. Of course we waited because other counters were also loaded with people. I was thinking there while watching the older guy having fits, hmm that could be me a few years ago, I could blow my top off and say something I would regret later. Well, the older gentleman wanting for me to say something. I just smiled at him and didn’t say anything. I think he got the message that he should just wait and try to calm down. I tried to talked to him about some other stuff instead. I am so proud of myself for having my patience now. Of course sometimes I’m no angel too. I could get my frustrations once in awhile. Hey guys it happens sometimes. 😉
Just like we keep saying here on LIP it is not an easy adjustment here. If you have no patience don’t live here. You have to carry your patience everywhere you go here. It can be tested once in awhile. As we always remind here too, vacation time is way different than living here. If you intend to live here try not to tell the folks how to live their lives, it irritates some of them. They don’t like it at all.
You guys Agree or Disagree: Living as an expats “It’s more fun in the Philippines”
Mabuhay!
I shall be moving to the Philippines this August 2012 along with my wife and two German Sheperds. I am retiring from my second career, and desire to live a simple and uncomplicated Life. I know the culture, the fantastic people of the Philippines, the food, beverages, and past times. Yet there is a lot to learn, and things to see. I am anxious to travel throughout the islands and meet new people. I am coming to their country with RESPECT. I no longer wish to have a life style filled with stress and confusion. That is why I am moving to P.I. “Simply, Natural”……………….Thanks
Hi Terry – Good for you. Yes so much more to learn, that’s for sure. What part of the Philippines are you and family retiring? I hope you will be checking the island of Mindanao too.
I like that thinking “Simply, Natural”.
Have fun in adjusting and living here. Don’t give up.
Good luck to you and your wife. Thank you so much for stopping by here!
Terry,
How difficult was it to get permission to bring your dogs? we are moving in November and it sounds like a challenge to get all the paper work approved and ready within the 30 days that the initial Vet gives the health inspection. did you have any problems or am I over thinking this?
good luck on your move,
Dennis Glass
There is so much that can be learned here on LIP. Although I am a visitor, when I am there I easily recognize things that may happen that I had previously read here. On my last visit one of these things was ” pointing with the lips ” I finally saw it happen one day right in front of me and I thought to myself ” that is something right out of the LIP website ” .
Speaking for myself, I don’t really see that if I lived there it would be that much of a significant of lower cost when you consider the adjustments that might have to be made. I live fairly economically here
Patience ? I feel I must give the Filipino people a lot of credit but then again, many things that may seem very different to a foreigner they consider normal. Many times always a smile, that is something I should learn how to do. At times I have really had to remind myself not to blow my cool.
Yes, ” just Visiting ” and actually moving to live there lock stock and barrel I am sure are very different. that is why for me, I’ll stay where I am but still look forward to visiting on vacation. That way it will truly remain a More Fun place for me to visit.
Thanks for your very informative article Feyma, a very enjoyable read.
Hi Bob – Ha ha ha… Pointing on lips is the way to go. :-). You don’t have to use your arms and fingers to point out.
Oh yeah we have to let go of our anger sometimes. I do that once in awhile too. That would be normal. Hmm I have to watch out I could end up on “YouTube”, totally not cool then. But oh well.
I’m glad you had fun visiting Iligan city. Nice place to visit too. We have lots of friends there.
Thank you Bob for stopping by. As always its good to see you here!
I really didn’t have any problem adjusting to life there.
(But I’m a Cowboy type.)
And there are always things that will test your patience anywhere.
(even moving to another state in good Ole USA)
My biggest problem was adjusting the the corruption and knowing what fixer to trust and how much & how to pay people off.
Maybe the 2nd one is standing in line.
Were trained in America our lines are in a line.
There it is a crowd and it is hard to tell your place. ha ha ha
If I was going to list my complaints about life in America the list would be
VERY Long. So I will not bother.
But I prefer to live in the Philippines over all.
HI Dogglast MaCarther – I’m happy for you. Oh yeah, agree that whenever you live somewhere its a big adjustment. No doubt about that. Just my point on my post is that if people wants to live here, just don’t make the people change here for you. It just doesn’t work well here. It will be a heartache for both sides.
I’m really glad that you like to live here.
Thank you so much for your comment and advice.
Good luck!
Hi Feyma,
Takes some getting used to living in the Philippines. Now for me since I have been their many times. Still it isn’t the same as (living their). Like all things in life there has to be an adjustmenet period :).
Most of the time folks don’t under estimate the Philippine people and think they don’t know the ways of the world. HA! are they in for a rude awakening.
As for the people forcing their opionions on others in the Philippines. That is just rude! Many expat’s warn people not to do that and they do not have freemdom of speech like in their home country. They also don’t understand that even the laws are subjective and even though you can speak out on the laws their. You headed for trouble.
Most Philippine people will distant themselves from you to avoid being associated with those that do cause problems. I find that the people of the Philippines are more sensitive of their country and way of life. Nothing wrong with that. For a foreigner to step in and continue their way of life is fine but, to make demands that every pinay or pinoy act and do things the American way is rude. Your not in Kanasas anylonger DUH!. If they are not happy then they are free to leave and should.
My Bride tells me when I get frustrated with a few things and we laugh about it now. My bride always say’s (Philippines) lol. Somethings one never gets used to but hey your in the Philippines so chill, eat and have a few beers, chill some more and have a great time.
Lots to see, lots to do in the Philippines and most adventures start at home and go out and have fun learning about the Philippines. The Philippine people love to talk about the Philippines show you around and give you the best entertainment they can and offer you food and whatever they have. Just so you feel at home and comfy. Now I ask you, can anyother country do that and enjoy giving their best? Bet you won’t find one.
Loved your article Feyma. God Bless and take care always.
HI Matthew – Yep, adjustment period for sure.
Been hearing about expats here that can be rude and arrogant sometimes. Well it’s their choice then. They could get in trouble then. Yes, so true we are not in Kansas anymore.
Living in the Philippines could be fun if you try to go with the flow. It’s a big plus to have your patience with you always. Lots of stuff to learn here, and people are also helpful here too.
*** “Now I ask you, can anyother country do that and enjoy giving their best? Bet you won’t find one.” ***….ONLY IN THE PHILIPPINES!!! 🙂
Glad you swing by here. Have a good day!
I was an ex-pat for a number of years in the UAE, and there was a lot of frustration at first and the number 1 thing I had to learn was to allow more time for mundane tasks, and since I’m generally an “easy going” guy I dealt with it, it was maddening though. On one end I have to put with up with the with middle eastern expectations about time and such and at work I had to switch that and deal with Western expectations, even if the Middle Eastern expectations caused me to be late for the job. It was a learning experience.
Yes, I think it pretty impudent for ex-pats to demand their way of live become the norm for everyone in their host country. If one wants that, then move back to the native land, after all, the laid back lifestyle one says they want either applies to all or no one.
Hi The Wisconsin Skier – Yep, you get frustrated at first, but at the end you end up adjusting to the life there. Good thing you had an open mind living there. I’m pretty sure if you think back, some of your frustrations there before you will laugh it off now. It’s really a good learning experience for you.
Different cultures and language really were the 2 big barriers.
Yes, not totally cool to demand and be follow. If not happy living here, just go back to the place they belong.
Nice to see you here. Keep reading.
Cheers!
I have to agree with you here. And I think the simplicity and traditional ways of Philippine living is part of why Filipinos abroad keep “coming back home”. Even my parents and relatives in the states always refer to PI as “home”. There’s really nothing like home. Things can change everywhere you go, but you always know that everything will be the same at “home” and that’s the way it should always be.
HI Liggy – Amen to what you just said. I’ve heard so much of that when I used to lived there. My friends who were elderly wants to return to the PI and wanted to die and be buried here. Oh well, they really love their country. Nothing wrong with that.
Thank you for stopping by here. Thanks for sharing your thoughts!
What I have to be careful with is the immediate shock reaction. Only happened once, at the Ford dealership in Subic. I went to the service department to get a part for my Ford Everest. Conversation went something like this:
Me: Kumasta, po. Marong bang a replacement part for my Ford Everest?
Service: Hindi Po, wala.
Me: Thats ok, can you order one?
Service: Hindi po.
Me: &^&*^%%$&!^*@#@$%$@#@&)*)(@#**&#%#@$@*) IT’S A FORD! THIS IS A FORD DEALERSHIP &^&$@$!@%!!*()__)@((@^#^.
Just kiddin, I said Salamat po and left. Still have the anurism though.
Hi Pita (Sta Lucia) Mike – Ha ha ha… They don’t want your money…
Bob & I always said these lines before:
Only in the Philippines & Walang ganyan sa States!
Hope you found the parts somewhere. Good luck!
I plan to move to Mactan/Cebu in July and have been doing lots of reading and talking with Filipinos and ex-Pats. It seems like it would be obvious that if a person moves to a different country they should expect everything to be DIFFERENT. (duh)
I used to go to Mexico all the time, lots of good food, Mexican language, arts, etc. But when they started putting in American restaurants and clubs.. I stopped going. The purpose of my travel was to experience something different.. not the same I could have at home.
Just as I expect people to make an effort to learn English when they move to the US permanently, I feel it is my obligation to eventually learn Tagalog and adjust to the pace there. As my friend there says, “Here in the Philippines.. all we have is time.”. I’m OK with that.. I want a slower lifestyle than here in the US. People who want the American life should just stay in America, in my opinion.
Hi Henry – If you are moving to Cebu/Mactan, better not learn Tagalog, as it will be of almost zero value there. Cebuano is what you need to learn. Cebuanos are not fond of Tagalog, they would even prefer if you speak English!
Feyma,
I have had the same happen to me in the stores here. I even was the cause of it. I had about 5K peso worth of stuff in my cart for Christmas shopping. One item did not scan at the very first of the checkout. She sent the bagger to go get a replacement item. By the time my two buggies were all checked through the bagger had still not arrived back. This was even with the cashier taking her sweet time with each item. Well even I was upset it was taking so long. But I continued to wait money in hand to pay. Finally the guy comes back after what seemed like 20 minutes. Everyone behind me in line I know was upset. But I am sure glad no other Kano was there or it could have been worse. I paid the cashier and said thank you. I even tipped the bagger for waisting all that time. I was in the Christmas spirit!
Living in the province I try to be as much like the locals as I can. For one reason I do not want to stick out like a sore thumb and draw attention to myself. I deal with the roosters crowing at 4 in the morning and the dogs barking at 11 in the night. I spend my day on the farm and enjoy the evening with friends and family. I have tried not to change the way it is here. I for one like the laid back, slow life style. Reminds me of years past in the US.
Hi Steve Maust – Good for you to have waited and have your cool. Something to be proud of yourself. I know its not an easy thing to do, but have to try to have the patience with you sometimes. Thinking back later a good story to tell to others.
Living in the Philippines would never be complete without the roosters crowing and the barking of the dogs. Hmm, that must be trademark here. :-). In all honestly, will have to get used to it.
Glad you enjoyed living here. Kudos to you…
Always nice seeing you here. Keep reading and thank you so much for the comment.
Thank you for the nice article, Feyma. I appreciate you sharing these kinds of things with us. I’m learning a lot. I think that if you are not very patient, you’ll have trouble living anywhere – not just in the Philippines. My girlfriend, a Filipina, is not particularly patient and has a pretty bad temper to boot. She is certainly not shy about saying what’s on her mind. She even has a touch of obsessive compulsiveness as well, which certainly doesn’t resemble any of the attributes of a laid-back island girl. I suspect that her behavior back home in Mindanao would be a bit different from what she displays when having a bad day here in Japan (At least, I’m hoping that’s the case). It takes time for people to adjust (5 years or so for Feyma and Bob), and some people just never can get acclimated properly to a foreign country. It just depends on how culturally open you are. Some people are good with change, and some people aren’t. These different types exist wherever you go, and then there are other things, more personal reasons, that might be going on to make someone open his/her big mouth and say something stupid.
I’ve been living in Japan for more than 25 years, and I like my lifestyle here in a small fishing village with beautiful beaches. I prefer a simply, slow-paced lifestyle. I’m sure if I lived in Tokyo, I would be stressed out and would probably behave like one of those “Ugly Americans” I keep hearing about. I think that when a foreigner chooses to live in the Philippines or any other foreign country for that matter, s/he should choose a type of lifestyle that suits his/her personality. I know that is easier said than done, but people know what they like and what they don’t like. Choose your situation wisely and be flexible because you never know who is going to move in next door. (It could be call center.) Also, a nice rule to follow wherever you live is: if you don’t have anything nice to say, then perhaps it is better not to say anything at all. I suspect that the “squeaky wheel” saying doesn’t much apply in the Philippines, which is fine with me because I don’t think that I could handle being nagged to death by my future wife. Now, we just have to figure out what to do about that damn noisy chicken crowing at first light. Cheers!
Hi David Heil – I’m glad you enjoyed the post. Thank you.
Of course your wife’s attitude is not really a typical Pinay. But if you’re okay with it and she does not bother or fight with other people why not. It’s good to say what you think sometimes, just watch out when to say it though. Theirs also time that it will get you in trouble. Like you said you lived in Japan for over 25 years, how long did it took you to adjust living there? Is it same with us, 5 years?
On what you’ve said on the second paragraph, I pretty much agreed with you on that. I hope for your continued happiness in living a good life in Japan. At least no roosters crowing there. 🙂
I hope to see you more often here. Thank you for your nice comment.
Have a nice day!
Thanks Feyma,
Yes, I like my feisty little Pinay. Sometimes in life, we can’t help who we fall in love with, right? She is not as bad as, perhaps, I made her sound. She has many excellent qualities, and I do like a strong woman. I also like her honesty and emotion, especially when she is happy. She is quite affectionate, too. She is like the sunshine in a clear blue sky, but she can also be a typhoon – a category 10! Japanese women are so much more reserved and hide their emotion. One has to learn to read the stomach and subtle cues in order to understand what someone is really thinking here. Most emotion is usually hidden in varying degrees, depending on the person. I think that Japanese women keep too much inside and this comes out in their relationships. This area of Japanese culture is probably the most difficult for Westerners to understand. It just requires a higher level of sensitivity which, if you are involved with Japanese on a daily basis, you will naturally learn, but it does take time and experience – probably more than five years. My Pinay is so much easier to read, and I like that about her.
As far as my adjustment to Japan, I think that when we live in a foreign country, the adjustment period goes on constantly. However, after 3 years, I realized that I wanted to live here on a permanent basis. Keep in mind that I studied about Japan, went to the university here, lived with a Japanese family for a year as an exchange student, and always wanted to live and work in Japan. It was a dream of mine. (Be careful what you wish for, right?!) However, I think that Japan is a pretty easy place for Westerners to live. It is quite modern, even in the country; people keep to themselves for the most part; and service here is beyond the expectations of any Western standard. In fact, service is an art form here with the goal of absolute customer satisfaction. There is not much to complain about. That being said, of course, there are times when I get frustrated. After all, I am an independent-thinking American who always has an opinion. On the other hand, Japanese are more group oriented and consensus building. The good thing about Japan is that Japanese never expect me to be Japanese. In return, I don’t expect them to be American. Culture is such a deep thing; it isn’t something that we can turn on and off. Even if we understand a lot about the culture of our host country, it doesn’t mean that we will always agree with the differences. I think that the only thing about Japan that displeases me is being constantly treated like a foreigner, even after 25 years. My looks just keep giving me away! Anyway, adjusting to another culture is an ongoing process. Of course, nobody likes to be told what to do, but when it comes from a foreigner, it just rubs the natives the wrong way. Just ask my students. It’s clear that they don’t like me telling them what to do, especially when I am assigning them homework.
As for that damn rooster, you are right, Feyma, I don’t have to worry about him, but there are a lot of dog lovers here!!!
Oh, and since I am an American, all you Americans living in a foreign country, shut up and be happy!!!!
Feyma, please say hello to Bob for me and keep the articles coming. Thank you so much!
Hi Feyma,
Sorry but I have to disagree somewhat 🙁 I don’t think it is bad to have an opinion about where you live, whether it is good or bad. Of course I wouldn’t force anyone to agree or even listen.
If bad service is accepted by all then it will never change for the better, surely we need to progress.
I read a lot of Philippines forums, the most common thing I read is ” if you don’t like this or that… then go home”……..but is it so bad to have an opinion 🙂 one that you can share with others but not forcefully or aggressively.
I have Filipino friends that live here in the UK, they have some negative opinions about some of the things that are done here… and I agree with them 🙂
My biggest bugbear was with Filipino time, I can’t see me ever getting used to it 🙂 and I know lots of Filipinos that would like it to change too.
This sentence you wrote is probably the truest
“I have to adjust or else I’m going insane, Not really cool.”
Just my 2 cents worth 🙂
Hi gerry – It’s okay to disagree. Like the rest of the writers here, we will say whatever we observed and tried to share with all of our readers.
To be totally honest with you, when we first moved here I would never accept bad service. I would really say what I think, I really demand better service. My patience at that time was really short. I realize later that people here were more open in accepting on everything and have better attitude, they even had a big smile on their faces even with the hardship they are facing. So I tried to follow and just go with the flow. I don’t want to end up in the hospital for heart attack.
When I was in the States, I’m pretty sure I had my share of list of not liking to live there. But I tried to adjust and happily living there for 10 years.
We also emphasize here that no place is perfect. Wherever you chose to live just try to be happy.
I know what you mean on the Filipino time. It is a big problem that’s hard to change here.
Thank you for stopping by. Thank you for your comment.
Cheers!
Ms Feyma,
Well I fall into that category of people who have only visited the Philippines and not lived there . . . yet. But I did live in other overseas countries for extended periods of time and so have at least a little experience. It’s sad that your friend had such a negative experience when renting her house to a foreigner, as not all foreigners are such disagreeable people. Maybe I’m different than most, but I take great pride in trying to “fit in”, even though I will never be able to disguise my 6’3″, 200 pounds plus “kano” appearance. When my turn comes to live in the Philippines, I hope that I can find a landlord who is willing to take a “risk” on another foreigner. Please tell your friend to not give up hope on foreigners just yet.
Hi ScottB – I tried talking to my friend about it. I think she was listening to what I’m saying to her that not all foreigners are the same. She just got lucky that she got what she’s wishing for right now, a Filipino renter. She told me that she’s happy because they (renter) took care of the house nicely.
I’m pretty sure you will find a good landlord here. Good luck on your move here.
Thank you for your comment and your visit on our site.
Have a great day!
A simple philosophy of mine- “Its not where you are, its who you are”. Every area has advantages and disadvantage, enjoy the positives, and accept the rest.
Hi Bill Bernard – True too. Good advice.
Thank you for the nice comment.
Cheers!
When I read the stories of the rooster crowing at 4 and the neighbor hammering metal at 1 AM, I just chuckle, because that is how it is on my wife’s family farm. I wonder if you have the same problems if you buy into a “modern” sub division in the PHL?
Hi Brent Johnson – Only in the Philippines. 🙂
Living in a high end subdivision would be the way to go if you are so sensitive about noises. Some subdivision really have restrictions about pets. But can’t control the pets outside the subdivision.
Have a good day!
i only visited Philippines 3 times but wish to be able to afford to move there and i do beleive that somes foreigners have some problems to adjust with the filipino daily life there. I think i was a good visitor, i am naturally gentle, patient probably a little more than the average but what i saw 2 times it just make me feel bad to be a foreigner these time.
Once a drunk foreigner was just given shit to the little woman because she didn’t have any more room. After he left, i said to the woman, i really don’t like the way he talk to you and i was really close to tell him but he left before talking and swearing i wish to meet the same man here in my city acting like he did, i am sure it will be my pleasure to let him know, to adjust or to go back.
and other time at the small terace’s bar i was sitting and having a beer, this foreigner with me was gentle and seem to be nice until the server came to serve us, i just wish to desapear, the guy was really giving to server ORDER and loud, i think the server really feel bad if not then me i did. After i left to told my wife, wish to see to guy doing the samething in my town, i think my friends will just have a pleasure to kick him in his butt, what is the problem with them, do they really feel inside that they are really superior, but because of people like this i understand our friend filipino not to like all of us.
we visit, we travel and we have to adjust not them. but in return i expect the same when they come to my country.
P.s: sorry for my english, kind of poor.
Hi renay – Good thing that you have your patience with you. Foreigners or Filipinos if they get drunk they can be loud and rude. Too much drinking can lead you to trouble no matter what part of the world you are. I wish they shy away to too much drinking here. Sometimes the foreigners/Filipinos they will be fighting with their girlfriend in the bar and they get physical, then to drunk to remember what happened until they will be at the police station.
What part of the Philippines did you visit? I hope you will retire here someday soon.
Don’t worry about your English, its good.
Thank you for commenting here. Keep reading.
Cheers!
Thanks for your nice welcoming to me, my story can be long but i make it short. The first first time i visited, it was in manila so i saw a lots of places around and i went there 2 times in the same years to meed a woman but it was just a scam..she was marry etc.. for sure i discover these things only after. but my third trip it was from Cebu to Mindanao Island, i didn’t really visit but i saw, Ozamis, Clarin Oroquieta city and somes other city around. I really like the place. one day i will buy a lot and i will build with my wife a bambou house. Not a small one but confortable, i don,t want to stay in sub-division but i want to be 100% part with the people there, far to be rich so nothing to be still from me. lol….
But i will never stay there 12 months a year, you see me i love the winter season and probably my patience is good for only 3 to 5 months, so noisy there then i will need vacation to my place…and to charge my battery of patience.. i wish to buy the lot this year and i will just put it on my wife’s name, no probelma with that.
I will enjoy to read all the post here and also i know i will learn a lots of good advices from all of you.
again thanks to let me sahre with you.
Hi renay – Hey, I’m glad you caught the scam right away. I’m happy that you found the woman for you. Oroquieta is quite a ways from where I live. I had some classmates in college that lives there. Been there when I was a kid. Pretty nice place.
Ha ha ha… You gotta have the winter season. Different from some expats. That’s why they come here to stay away from the winter time. Oh well, everyone is different. Good thinking of charging your battery once in awhile. Make the patience over flowing so that it will help you a lot here.
Yes, you can ask anybody here some questions about living here. I’m pretty sure lots of our Lip family will gladly answer you.
Have fun reading and learning here on LIP!
Hi feyma
a go posting girl and i must say u always get that one that makes it hard for every one no matter where u live mate he is there ok and i wont to tell u about some think that happend to me on my last trip up nouth to manila as u know we have ahome about 45 mins down south from manila city and i love it there and the ppl are so lovley always to me and my wife there well one day my wife was out side playing a game off cards with friends andiw as siting at he back off them but i was not playing and as u may or may not know i have a very bad back and i am always in pain with it will that day my back was givng me what 4 and it must have been showing in my face now thay did not know why i was looking the way i was and the friends did think i was upset and mad at them and was saying to joy in filipina look ur old man is very up set with us lol not at all iw as in pain and joy ask me after why was u mad at my friends and i had to tell her what the matter with me was that i was not mad but in a hell off a lot off pain lol so i know from now on i must keep my feelings to my self and not let it show and i think what i am trying to say here is us from the west must take care with how and what we do when we do it for we may be hurting some one with out knowing and that can work two ways too as us men live how own lives here down under or from the us are not always the same as the way filipinas live there so must always think be for we say or do somthink to hurt some one……..god bless…..peter martn tassie
Hi peterjoy – Thank you. I’m sure those friends of your wife would understand after the good explanation about your situation. They can’t blamed you for making faces there.
I hope you are retiring soon here with your wife. Enjoy the sunny Philippines. It might be better for your back.
As always, good to see you here Peterjoy. Have a good weekend mate!
Hi Feyma – In some respects I see your point and agree, but not in other ways. Provided the person criticising is being constructive there is nothing wrong with that. Confusing rudeness with being critical can lead to bad feelings towards foreigners that appears to be obvious in some cases.
It’s amazing that some Filipinos when returning from living and working abroad attempt to highlight the more annoying aspects of life here and are criticised for doing so, just maybe the ones who have never been anywhere should listen and they may learn.
For anyone coming to live here in the Philippines albeit a returning OFW or a foreigner they cannot be expected to grin and bear it when they see something so blatantly wrong that perhaps either goes against the grain or is just plain illegal where they have come from.
Whilst I personally don’t condone rudeness or downright bad manners I think the Filipino should be more self-critical and ask themselves why some foreigners behave as they do rather than assume they are always like that and should go back to where they came from originally.
I’m sure Filipino’s have off days as well as foreigners but that does not make either, unhappy all of the time. As the saying goes ‘you can please some of the people some of the time, but not all of the people all of the time’. And that applies wherever you are in the world.
Regards.
Jim.
I totally agree Jim. Being married to a Filipina for 25 years has, in my mind, verified a degree of stubborn close-mindedness that is replicated like hand me down clothing. It’s definitely an inherited dogma. My biggest question has always been, how can such talented, smart and ingenious people be so indignant when it comes to change. I’ve realized over the years I am only one man and I’m not going to change anything, so I’ve just learned to live with it. Who knows, the old saying “just go with the flow” could have been coined by an expat in the RP.
Hi Jim – Most Filipinos that I’ve observe were interested to listen on the lifestyle from the other place (abroad), only thing don’t force them to follow from what was done abroad, I think it irritates them big time.
I can’t change the mind of so many Filipinos. I know they generalized almost always the behavior of the foreigners. Really hard to educate all of them on that. Well, if the foreigners having a hard time adjusting here I think they have to think hard then if this is the place for them. We can’t please everybody in this world.
This is not paradise. Have to work hard on adjusting here.
Have a great day! Good to see you here as always!
Hi feyma i have to admit when i was there i had an incident at victoria plaza where the register we were on went down ,i had a catholic minister/missionary in front of us we waited while the manager stuffed around for quite some time instead of moving us to a vacant register so we could proceed ,this minister lost it at her i thought they were all calm men of god but not this one wow did he let her have it (he was from australia to) after about 30 or so minutes of standing just looking at the poor girl on the register i put the tooth brush down that i was buying and left ,i think i spent my paitence waiting to buy 1 item up in the 30 minutes as we were meeting people to go to samal for a few days and were on a time schedual i have heard it called island time before but most things i can handle , one thing i did notice was that there seems to be no sence of urgency about anything but as you say thats the phills if you cant handle it then dont live there ,the west is so stressed about get it done right now maybe we all need to take a philipino pill and calm down
chris
Hi chris – Wow, that surprises me. They are the one that had high patience towards anything. Oh well.
Ye, its so laid back lifestyle for a lot of people here. They don’t get so stressed here the way the West do. They have more patience here than a lot of us. 🙂
Nice seeing you. Have fun on your stay here in the Philippines.
Cheers!
While living in the U.S. , I complained about everything—from the weather, food, down to nasty sales persons, racism, and the American’s lack of empathy. I have been living in the USA for 13 years, and now I’m just temporarily back to Davao, Phils. for a year for my studies, and since then, I have been comparing it to the USA, and find a lot of things to gripe about. I had a little bit of “culture shock” in my own turf. I complained about the dust, pollution, poverty, and the return policy of stores–from trivial to significant. But in the end, I came to realize that I love my hometown even more than I can find its imperfections.
Happiness does not come from the environment or based on exterior. It is an attitude despite circumstances of imperfection and adversities.
Great post Ma’am Feyma!
Hi viviene – Welcome back to Davao City. I know lots of things to compare between the 2 countries it either good or bad. Only thing I can say just have fun on your stay here. Enjoy your family and the food while staying here.
Hope you will retire here someday. Good luck on your studies!
Enjoy!
I really don’t have problem with being corrected, I know we can learn from it. However, my question is who is right and who is wrong in doing things. Filipinos has been doing their ways for generation….maybe hundreds and hundreds of years and seem like they tolerate and not even bothered with anything, …..however when the OFW and the foreigners come ….they want to change things and the way how people should act. I am just curious, who are the ones formulating the RIGHT STANDARD OPERATING PROCEDURE on how to act or do things in this world? Who are we suppose to follow…the foreigners or the Filipinos if we live in the PHILIPPINES.
Hi DINE – You raised up a good point there. Big questions that needs big answers. Maybe we will have to ask a pro on this one, the general public. Well see what they think.
Thank you for your thoughts and comment.
Happy to see you here!
DINE
It is all very well to not want to change things that have been done a certain way for centuries but i find it odd that they are unwilling to adapt to the international way of life when the DOT has just embarked on a new tourist campaign. It’s easy to say “if you don’t like it, don’t come” but how does the country expect to attract tourists where dysfunctional practices take place everywhere you look.
You only have to look at Singapore to see how successful things can really be when a change is brought about and yes i am a supporter of it’s draconian laws and believe it should be applied here in Philippines too. If you look at Vietnam, Indonesia, Thailand and other SE Asian countries, they are adapting to 21st century practices making it hospitable for foreigners while retaining cultural beliefs however i don’t believe that there is much worth preserving in the Philippines as it does not have a rich cultural history.
Anyway who should you follow? I think that the west being the most successful civilization to date speaks for itself. There is a reason why it is so dominant and powerful and should be a model for all countries to aspire to.
I have never been to either of those three countries but i am aware that they are more open to foreign investment which really hurts the Philippines. However i’m sure the white skins still get harrassed by the money hungry locals in the tourist districts LoL.
Jim get those constructive criticisms outta your head right now. There is no such thing as constructive criticism in the Philippines and that is a deportable statement i’m sorry to say. Don’t criticise them eventhough they’re wrong coz it’s their country and if you don’t like their dysfunctional practices you can GTFO
I’ve tried to go out of my way to avoid being that ‘ugly American’ you always hear about. I did have an incident at an SM in Manila where they refused to accept a credit card from the states and they were not at all pleasant about it. I tried to reason with the manager who kept giving me her mannequin smile and the ‘Sorry store policy’ excuse. I paid cash for the item, P14,000, and fumed a bit. We then took a walk next door to the National Bookstore and Pizza Hut used the same card with no problem. Very frustrating indeed. It’s a Citi Bank card so not something unfamiliar to the stores here. I’ve since become a big fan of Robinsons, lol. In my everyday dealing with people here I just try to remember I’m a guest here and that my wife’s family is here. I don’t want to do anything to embarrass me, them or to put Americans in a worse light than some folks here already see us. Sad to say I was once complimented by someone who said I had nice manners for a Kano. I’m trying to change that perception one Filipino at a time whenever I’m here.
I think this topic left out was an important sub-topic about what type of foreigners move to the Phils.
Sadly, most of them are losers from there country of orgin.
I have traveled to the Phils. Mainly because of my family on my mother’s side. My dad is a white American.
Anyway, during my last visit, i met a group of Americans at the hotel i was staying at.
Everytime i ran into them, they were complaining about something. I eventually motion the group to me and told them they should try to find the tallest building in the city and hurl themselves off of it. If they would do this, then the world would be cleaner. Of course all i received was a “dumb” look from the group. Shaking my head, i turned around and walked away before i did something stupid to those people.
If you are not a loser, please ignore this post. If you are:
Stop Whining!!
Stop Thinking like a Victim!!
Stop feeling like you are entitled!!
Most people don’t care about your little pension!!!
In my business in the States, i let you whine and complain about everything until you stop making me money. Then i “tactifully” tell you i am going in a different direction.
It would seem that the filipino’s should treat the foreigners the same way.
Most of them? What, did you take a countrywide survey you idiot. Most retirees I know have worked their entire lives and successfully built up their hard earned savings and a retirement so they could come to the RP and relax. There are many others that have come here and make their money by working hard. You and that other idiot – Manila Stud – should maybe share the same suitcase and take the same flight out – one way! If not, go sow poison in some other blog.
No complaints here I do just what a doctor told me to do .. he said” just go with the flow and enjoy it” … I’ve stood in line and waited for the girl to find a price for MY item and know one complained to me so i don’t complain about them .
“You have to carry your patience everywhere you go” That is a very true statement. When I was in Philippines, and newly married, I remember how frustrating it was to walk into a place of business with an errand I wanted to accomplish and being told to “Please Sair, Just wait…..” Even when no other customers were there. Impatiently, I told the lady behind the counter: “I don’t want to wait, I want to do this now please” and I smiled as well as I could. She said: “Oh, You want to Expedite it?” I said “YESSSSS” Then she smiled and waited on me immediately. I chuckled later about it, but it was trying on my patience.
just look at this viedo…
20 Reasons I Dislike _____. (the Philippines
http://channelfix.com/video/174/
Renay, that video was interesting, but maybe Jimmy should just get the #%*@ out if it pisses him off so much. Also, can’t say I much care about how he represents his/my country.
Randy. i know you hear about that all over the Phil. but what i found interested in the news that saw the video and on their side they try to correct somes agurments the guy is saying and showing on the video…I think Davao is very positive and that is the way to do it..
anyway feel free to remove the post , no problema with me
take care all of you