Our youngest son is Jared Martin. Jared is 7 years old now. Remember, I have lived here in the Philippines for 7 years, so as you can figure, Jared was very young when we moved here! Actually, Jared was one month and a few days old when we arrived in the Philippines as immigrants here. So, studying Jared and his development is very interesting to me, and presents me special challenges that I feel are important in his case.
Because Jared was so young when we moved, he basically has no memory of the United States. He claims that he remembers it there, but as we know that is really impossible. More about that later. Anyway, as Jared moved here at such a young age, I feel it very important that I take steps to make sure that Jared learns about American, and about being an American. He is, after all still half American, right? This means everything from learning about how Americans live, some US history and such, and that sort of thing. For me, the most important thing is American culture. Living in our house where both Feyma and I are very American, Jared has a good taste in American culture, though. Honestly, in his actions and such, I find him very American, and not much different from his brothers. I do have a rule that our kids can speak only English if inside the house. If they go play outside they can speak whatever they want (which means Cebuano!), but inside the house, they must speak English. I do this because it is important for these kids to keep their English skills up to date, and be proficient in American English. This may be very important for employment later in life, and I don’t want my kids to be behind their American cousins.
I mentioned that Jared claims to remember living in the USA. One time he told me that he remembers it, and I just played along with him. I asked him if he remembered “the time when the crocodile came into our yard and was trying to eat us, and then I wrestled with it, and scared it away?” Of course, he insisted that he remembered that, an incident which was just a joke that I made up at the moment! I played along on that particular story for several years before I finally told him that it was just a joke that I made up. He took it in good stride, yet still insists that he remembers living in the USA.
With Jared, I feel that my challenge in raising him is almost completely opposite of his brothers. With the other kids, they have memories of the USA, and with Jared, anything American has to be instilled in him. I want all of my kids to grow up being well rounded, and that is particularly challenging with Jared. So far, though, I feel that we have been very successful in raising Jared in this way.
In a lot of ways, Jared is very much like Aaron. That means that he is like me too, since AJ and I are so much alike. Lately, Jared has been growing a lot, and Feyma and I are a little sad that Jared is growing up and getting big. Our youngest is not so young anymore!
Jared is a great kid, and I love watching him as he grows! As with my other kids (including JeanJean), I am so proud to have Jared as my child!
Jared is guapo kaayo, like big manongs and manang. Just curious Bob, do people at times (relatives, friends and sometimes strangers) pinch the cheek or mess/touch the hair of your kids ?
Hi Jul – Yes, people are always pinching the cheek of all the boys! And, they hate it so much! Aaron won't even ride a jeepney, because every time he does, people pinch his cheeks! 😆
Bob, I just discovered your blog a few weeks ago. It's very fascinating reading! Almost like a sociological case study with plenty of practical life tips.
As a Filipino living and working in the US for several years now, I always see US life from the point of view of an outsider looking in. So it is very interesting to read about the experiences of someone from the mirror point of view – an American living and working in the Philippines.
Your story about Jared 'pretending' to remember about life in America is very funny. His experience of growing up in the Philippines (which I consider a fine environment to grow up in), while at the same time retaining that American identity will surely give him that added edge when he grows up.
I love how much you love the Philippines. And wish more Filipinos would share your passion about our own country.
Bob you have a fine wholesome family, you and Feyma are obviously caring parents, your children will grow up to be well rounded individuals, I think that as parents that is probably the best achievement we can make.
Hi Rob and Gerry – Thanks for your nice comments! I'm glad to hear your thoughts! 😀
Hi Bob,
Jared's lucky I didn't get to meet him in April. I would have pinched his cheeks, he's soooooo cute!!! Okay, I would have given him a big hug!!! Now, he looks just like you! Were you this cute when you were a kid??? 😆
Hi Tina – I'm having fun playing "comment tag" with you! I am following you around responding to all your comments! Yeah, Jared is often called "Bob Jr." by my employees and extended family (as is Aaron), because he looks so much like me. What do you mean when you say "were you this cute when you were a kid???" I thought I still was that cute! Now you are damaging my ego! 😆
Last night Jared gave me a huge surprise. He came and asked Feyma and I if he could join the ballet club in his school! I was shocked, but did not react in that way. He kept going back and forth on whether he really wanted to do it. I suspect that he wants to join because some of his "favorite girls" are doing it, but I can't be sure. If he still wants to join after a few days, I will gladly let him do so. It will be an interesting experience! 😆
Aha! Following in his father's footsteps huh? Just kidding! 😆
Tina – Can you imagine me doing ballet? Ha ha… that would be a sight to behold!