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We have decided to make a major change
Many people misinterpreted my September 19 article
Back in September, I published an article about whether Feyma and I would move back to the USA. As I said in the article, it is something we have been considering for several years. During these years, when we have considered moving back, we have always ended up deciding to stay in the Philippines.
In our discussions in August and September, we again decided to stay in the Philippines, but we also decided we would travel to the USA every couple of years or so.
Since that article was published, an endless number of people have mentioned to me that they read that we were moving back to the USA, but as I say, that is not what the article said at all, in fact, it said the opposite.
Then came October
In October, we again revisited the topic. Feyma was in the USA at the time, just preparing things for her trip home to the Philippines (She arrived home on October 27 for those interested). While we were chatting, Feyma asked me if I would be interested in returning to live in the USA. I told Feyma that I was open to discussing it, and we talked, asked each other questions, and so on.
In 2017 and 2018, Feyma went to the USA (mostly Alaska) and worked for 6 months each year. For haters who have emailed me about this… it was Feyma’s choice to do this, not ideal for me, but I was supportive of my wife doing what she wished to do. Feyma explained to me that after spending significant time back in the USA over the past 2 years, she realized how much she missed the USA. Feyma lived in the USA for 10 years after our marriage. She told me that she feels more at home in the USA now, and that made me think.
I have not been back to the USA for nearly 19 years
Since moving to the Philippines in early 2000, I have never been back to the USA. I never really felt a desire to do so or had a real reason to go back. However, in recent years I have been feeling a bit of a pulling to go back home, at least to visit. After listening to Feyma talk about her desire, it made me start wanting to go back.
I started thinking about some of the drawbacks of life in the Philippines. Yes, there are drawbacks. There are a lot of downsides to living in the Philippines. But, there are also drawbacks of life in the USA too. There are drawbacks to every location in the world. No place is perfect.
Continuing husband and wife discussions
So, after discussing this over several days with Feyma, I agreed with her. I was ready to move back to the USA.
At first, it was more about supporting Feyma and giving her what she desired. I was fine with that. Feyma and I have been married for 28+ years. She has always followed me, done what I wanted to do.
In the 90’s, I decided that I wanted to move to the Philippines. It was not something that Feyma was interested in, but after some extended discussion, she agreed to follow what I wanted.
In recent years (kind of since my near death from heart disease), I have been trying to “re-invent” myself, or you could say improve myself. I have changed a lot of the way I handle things, how I handle relationships (especially with my wife) and other things about myself. I feel, and Feyma agrees, that I have been pretty successful on this journey. Giving Feyma a chance to take the lead is something that I am enjoying. The decision to move back to the USA is a big part of that.
As time went on…
After making the decision to give Feyma a chance to follow the path that she wants, we kept talking about it, making plans, etc. I started getting more excited about it. At this point, I am really ready to make the move as soon as possible. I am excited to go back.
More articles and information coming
This week, I will write an article on this topic each day telling more about our plans, reasons for our decision, and so on. I think we have made a good decision and will have a good and successful life in the United States.
In some ways, it is a bit scary to make such a move after living here in the Philippines for nearly 2 decades. But, it is also exciting, and filled with possibilities!
So, come back and visit each weekday (Philippine time) this week for more about why Bob & Feyma Martin are moving back to the USA!
To move or not to move is a decision, that only you and your family should make and be damned what anyone else thinks. But where ever you settle, back in the “Land of the big PX” (A military term meaning mall sized Post Exchange’s on US Base’s)
Let us know the fate of LiP, I see no reason why you can’t continue from where ever you live.
But bottom line, I wish you all the best for you and yours. Fair winds and following seas!
My article on Friday is all about what will happen to LiP, so that will be covered. It is a decision that I have yet to 100% decide, but I have options. Yeah, I agree 100%, Paul, it is a decision for Feyma and me, not others. I still value people’s opinions. But, the final decision is ours, and we have made it after much consideration. I have already been told that I am a hypocrite because I have always said I had a great life here, and now am leaving. I don’t consider that hypocritical at all.. it is… Read more »
Bob – I hope you will discuss the option of splitting time living in each place. This is our plan, but we have to sort out the one item of biggest cost which is health insurance when in the U.S. Love to hear your thoughts on this topic. I anxiously await your coming articles!
Hi Michael. I won’t really be getting into the split time or snowbirding thing. I have, honestly, always thought that to be a poor solution (and have written about that many times over the years). The reason I don’t consider it a good solution is because making the cultural shift to the Philippines is not easy and takes time. If every time you are just starting to make the change, mentally, you turn around and go back for 6 months, you will never be able to make the shift. That is how I feel. Others, including you, may think differently,… Read more »
I’ve been in the Phillippines for nearly five years and moved here because low educated liberals are ruining America. I’m proud of American history but ashamed of its current day form.
I’m excited for you in chasing the dream you desire but I can say for me a return to the U.S.A. will likely never happen.
Never, say never. (LOL) I’ve lived here since 1993. Will I ever go back to live in the USA? I don’t “THINK” so, but fate has a way of changing all plans. Spread my ashes on Subic Bay!
Completely agree and this is why I included “likely” before never. I have considered taking a trip of a couple months to America at some point but I’m even wishy-washy on that.
Currently in Angeles with a nice house completely paid for and have pondered buying another in Subic Bay. We might someday become neighbors.
Hi Paul – yep, you just never know. I moved here at a young age (38) and I have been here for nearly 2 decades. I just feel it is a good time to make a life change!
I thought the same for many years too, Paul. Never wil go back to live in the USA. But, like you say, never say never. I am now excited to make the change.
exactly the same here- 8 years and dont ever care to go back
I felt the same at 8 years, even 15 years here. I’m just ready for a new adventure.
How scott do you suport yourself ?
Hi Paul. I’ve been here for nearly 2 decades. I think I’ve taken in all I can when it comes to the Philippines. I have loved it. I’m just ready to take in something different now. I have some business and personal plans that will do much better being US based. My wife really wants to live in the USA> I wish you the best with your life in the Philippines. I had a great life here…. I think I will have the same in our new destination.
I agree with you totally and always have the big move in the back of my mind but I can’t make near the income in PI that I can in KY.
I always have my Pinoy Paradise as the US seems to be getting less and tolerant under the guise of eradicating intolerance.
Just like when people move to the Philippines, you should go on an exploratory trip. I’m on my second extended trip back to the USA and I can’t wait to get back to the Philippines. Things, in general, are far worse than I remember from 2006.
I’ll be leaving Florida in February and heading to Hawaii. I don’t know when I’ll leave again, but it will be before my ACR I-Card expires. I’m currently visiting an Aunt near DC (for three weeks) and it’s cold. I hate the cold.
We are about 80 to 90% of the way to making a final destination in the USA, RT. We have 3 locations in mind, which will be revealed tomorrow. All three in are in the same general part of the USA, and also an area where I have never lived before. I am looking forward to the new experiences.
Hi Bob, I have been considering the same for Canada right now – tried it twice earlier (alone) but was not to my liking. Now I have been married to a Filipina for 6 years, I think it would be fun and educational for her. Unfortunately Canada is a bit restrictive in admitting Filipinas with no previous experience in working and living in Canada. I keep thinking of it, but I then think of how warm it is here in the Philippines – all year round! That has many benefits – both economic and healthfuil. Medical is expensive in all… Read more »
Hi John. The move is easy for us, since Feyma has US Citizenship. No hassles at all. Tomorrow in my next article I will talk about cold weather and such. We found a solution for that. 🙂 It would be harder to solve that in Canada, though, LOL. Eh? I can’t complain at all about the healthcare here. I have nearly died 3 times during my 19 years here. Stroke, heart attack, and a quadruple bypass. I had great care each time. In fact, if we did not move to the Philippines when we did, I think I would already… Read more »
Bob and Feyma home is where you make it. Life back is US is not the same as you may remember . Things have changed . I wish the US was still like 1970’s however it is not. We all change over time. Go back and check it out before making any move. God Bless.
Home is certainly where you make it. Feyma has been back there 6 months each of the last 2 years. She wants to move, and I support her on that. She has always followed me, I am ready for her to do what she wants, I owe her that. We appreciate your thoughts, though.
It’s not the same as when you remember.
Yes, I have said it dozens of times already.. it is not the same place it was 20 years ago, no place would be.
Surprising, but I am sure you have been very thoughtful in your decision-making. I will be interested to see how this plays out.
And remember if you come to California to visit, we must connect!
Hey, Tom.. I was going to email you and ask if you could prepare a room for us. LoL
For sure, you at the top of my list of people I HAVE to connect with!
We are both looking forward to a lot of new experiences.
Well Bob, my asawa believes you’re making the right decision. We only lived in the Philippines for six years, but returning to the U.S. was a good choice for us. My wife lived in the states for 30 some years before we moved to Dinalupihan, Bataan in May, 2012. We decided on Hudson, Florida for our new location. We are both happy and both blessed. Hope you and Feyma feel the same.
I didn’t think this before, but I think we are also moving in the right direction. I am excited for the move now, can’t wait. Thanks for sharing your experiences.
If I ever did go back it would only be to Florida, I spent many a happy year there even if they can’t count votes properly. NO STATE INCOME TAX TOO!
LoL, but you gotta put up with all of those hurricanes! LoL
Where ever you end up enjoy your lives together. One never knows how much time we have for that. Time is the one precious commodity none of us can afford to waste. Where we spend it is a lot less relevant than who we spend it with! Best of luck my friends. 😉
Tomorrow, I will be revealing where we will settle, at least 2 different places that we are considering. Thanks for sharing your thoughts!
I heard you may be going back here to the States. God bless your decision whatever it is. But if you do go back here and need a faithful worker to help any of your businesses back there Id be very happy to do that… ie. customer service, mgmt, etc.
Thanks, Tom. I’ll keep that in mind. Yes, we are going back to the US in the not too distant future.