It was with great sadness this afternoon that I learned of the death of a true friend, Dave Brefka. Dave was a long time reader of LiP, and was engaged to marry Jing and I believe that he planned to live in the Philippines after that.
I have known Dave for about a year now through e-mail, and he was a frequent commenter on the LiP Web Magazine over this time.
Dave was a Graphic Designer, and he told me that he planned to continue to pursue this business after living in the Philippines. I believe that he hoped to relocate to the Philippines this year. Dave lived in Ashland, Oregon.
At this time, the cause of Dave’s death is not known. He was only 50 years old. An autopsy is pending to determine the cause of death. Dave was found lifeless at his home in Ashland, and it is believed that he passed away on Friday night or Saturday, this past weekend.
Rest in Peace, Dave. Somewhere inside me, I believe that you have found a resting place where you can see and enjoy the Philippine home that you dreamed of. My thoughts are with you. All my best, and my true condolences to Jing, Dave’s fiancee also. I hope that you can overcome the tragedy.
So sorry to hear.
I send my regards to his love ones and to you Bob his friend.
Sorry to hear about Dave, always a shock to hear about such a tragedy at that age.
Too sad and too young. Heartfelt condolences to his family.
..Sorry to hear about your friend Bob . Life is so precious , Enjoy the moment .You never know … Phil n jess
Yes it does… Especially now. He wasn't much older than me. I know that sounds selfish, though I don't mean it to.
Hi Bob,
I am very sorry to hear about your friend Dave. My prayers will be with his family and friends during their time of sorrow. We don't know when our Lord will take us and so we just need to be ready.
God Bless,
Dale
Please convey my condolences to Jing and his family if you can. It seems to have been quite unexpected. I am sure the whole family is in deep shock.
It is always scary for me when I hear the passing of someone younger than me…..it makes me realize my own mortality and to try harder to live a healthier life.
Our deep and dearest condolences to Jing, Trina and Udelle. May God provide them guidance and understanding during these most difficult times.
Sometimes we are all too busy with the trivial things in life to realize just exactly twhat is most important. Loss of loved ones at a relatively young age is life's reminder on where we should be focused.
Very sorry to read of Dave passing away like this. I did not know of him but I hope he at least had the chance to visit the Philippines and he had as good a time there as I had and possibly even a better time. I am sure the memories will still be with him.
My deepest condolence and sympathy to Jing’s family during these hardest times.
Hello Bob,
My heart overflows with gratitude upon knowing that there are indeed many people who cared for Dave, who will remember him with fondness…despite the fact that all of you have not met him in person yet. You are his friends he has yet to meet, but will not have the chance to… He was a great man, the embodiment of the ideal…he was full of zest and love for life….He was yet 50! It's unfair to take my "golden" boy away from me and from our dreams and plans…
We thought we had the perfect and pure love, that nothing would come between such a wonderful and complete relationship….we were proven wrong….His life was snuffed out of him, leaving me devastated and our dreams down to the waste bin…As the days passed, the pain has worsened as the fact of his death slowly sunk in….How can I not miss him, when barely five months ago we would chat on the inet for hours on end everyday…and on weekends, he would call me over the phone and talked with my daughter too, whom he fondly called "Udelles of Noodles". My daughter loved him too, and has been calling him "Daddy Ko" already, to his pride and delight…We were full of dreams and plans and we put them all in a place in our hearts we call "dream barrels" hoping that one day, we would pull those dreams out one by one for reality. We would have met in person for the first time in March (the start of Spring, he calls it), and he would have met my family so he can ask my hand in marriage…Everything was all set up and ready…
Then, all of a sudden, all of our dreams and plans came crashing down my face just because the man who promised to "grow old with me" had tragically died ahead of his time….leaving me broken and torn….Where shall I start picking up the pieces of my life, when I was so convinced there will be Dave_Jing team and a DJTUB family to nurture? It is more painful to know that I will not even see him for real to say my last goodbyes….Is this a punishment for loving a man unconditionally and selflessly who is 7,000 miles away from me? I know he will not be able to read this, but I want to thank him for loving me unconditionally and selflessly….For drawing the best in me…for making my heart smile…for completing me…Wherever he is right now, I know he is at peace….He knows what is in my heart…
Time is the best healer, I know, and my heart bleeds to know that I will have to rearrange my life and start from scratch all over again for Udelle and myself. Life has to move on…..Dave would not have wanted me to be sad forever….He would have wanted Udelle and I to be happy….
Thank you so very much, Bob and Feyma for the wonderful tribute you gave for my "Honey Ko"…and for all the kind thoughts and prayers of all your readers…Had he been alive, we would have come to Davao in March and meet some of you, if not all….But then again….
Forever grateful,
Jing
Jing-
Please contact me – I am a cousin of Dave’s – we share the same birthday. My mother and Dave’s father are brother and sister. I did not know that he was engaged at the time of his passing – I would like to talk to you about him if you would not mind. I find myself – searching for info about him on the internet from time to time.
Thank you,
Linda
Hi Linda,
So sorry, I have not read your comment here in LiP until now… I tried searching you in google and there are so many Linda Meades I don’t know which one it Dave’s cousin..
I have an FB account in the name of Jessica J. Opo, I will be very happy to meet and talk with you.
Best to you,
Jessica
Hello Bob,
You are welcome and thank you again for giving me space in your LiP to express my emotions…Your tribute to Dave moved me so much I can't help the tears to flow endlessly…And I thank your lovely wife, Ms. Feyma for e-mailing me about the tribute you did for Dave, hence, my coming here.
Yes, Dave had been to the Philippines in 2007, specifically, in Bacolod and Manila…We had not known each other then, but he later told me he fell inlove with the island he dreamed of retiring here. The picture you posted here with the four of us (Dave and his daughter Trina with myself and Udelle) was done by Dave, in photoshop…there are still some like that in my and his friendster accounts. Picture perfect family, I would call it…and I was dreaming of having a picture just like that in reality, meaning, not to undergo photoshop at all…(Now, it will remain a dream forever)….
It will be my honor and pleasure to meet you and Feyma one day….As I am living in Pagadian City (also in Mindanao), a travel to Davao is not impossible at all…Dave would have favored it…
Hello All,
It was so heard to hear about Dave's lost today through an old co-worker of mine who works at the local newspaper in the advertising department.
I was a student and friend of his when he was teaching at OIT. My family also knew Dave due to the art work he placed in our Thai Resturant here in Klamath Falls; inaddition to the GREAT and AMAZING logo he created for the resturant.
Dave was such an amazing teacher and inspiration to me. He art work spoke of so much. He was always so supportive of all of my worked. He was the person who motivated me to get into graphic design. Gosh. He was such an amazing friend, teacher, and artisit.
I hope he'll pain heaven with so many wonderful colors. I hope we can remember of all of the great times we shared with him. I hope that we can all take a piece of his creativity.
One funny story. I remember one day in our graphic design class last year. Dave showed me something new he got for himself during his birthday. He laughed but showed me…It was a tattoo of the Thai Orchid Logo he and I designed together. Ah! What a funny guy. His favorite dish my Mom cooked for him was the green curry with chicken.
Dave, I wish you the best in your next life. I will for sure miss you. Thank you for being such a great inspiration to me.
-Laty
Anyone interested in seeing examples of Dave's graphic design work and his paintings can go to davebrefkadesign.com.
It's a small sample. Dave was a fairly prolific painter.
Dave also leaves a son, Justin, who is about 22, and in college.
Dave and I have been friends for close to ten years…this hasn't really sunk in yet.
It is always truly sad and sometimes surprising to hear about the loss of a life. Specially when it comes so sudden.
I would have to agree with you Bob… Dave knows everything that Jing said. As they say "He is forever in our hearts and minds". He is now a guardian angel upon your shoulders Jing.
God speed and farewell…to you Dave
i am so sad to hear of dave's death. i knew him back when we both lived in klamath falls, oregon, when trina was just a little girl. i attended one of his art shows and fell in love with a painting called "city of sunshine", it hangs in my house today.
he was a warm, kind, and talented man and he will be missed.
-mphillips
My condolences to the family of Dave! My tears were flowing like a river after reading this article and the comments thereafter. Even tough I don't know Dave in person, I know we crossed paths through commenting here in LiP and from the one or two virtual encounter, I could sense that Dave is a pleasant person. Hi Dave! I know you can read or hear my thoughts right now. Have fun there on the Other Side. I'm sure you can visit the Philippines anytime you want now. 🙂
Hi Beth – Thank you for sharing your thoughts, I am sure it will make Jing and Dave very happy.
It would have been a lot better and a lot less complicated if Dave could come in all his physical self…Nonetheless, I drew comfort and solace with all your kind thoughts…Dave as an angel for me and Udelle is a warm consolation, and yes, I couldn't agree more with Ms Beth that Dave can now visit the Philippines and me anytime he wants – without airfare costs! The downside on that, however, is that I can't see him or touch him….Dave was an intelligent and a sensitive man with full of humor up his sleeves. He was an achiever in arts, business and education in Klamath Falls and Ashland, Oregon, yet he has no air in him with both feet touching firmly on the ground.
I very much regret the death of Dave, I’m trying to connect with a family member to retrieve a painting I gave to Dave for a show, someone would be so kind as to connect to me
A hug to your family