I got a voicemail recently from Henry. Henry had some shocking news! He told me that his girlfriend is sleeping with someone else! It was kind of shocking to me, especially when he asked if there was anything I could do to help him out! Well, I did come up with some things that Henry could do to alleviate the problem, or at least have his girlfriend cut back on her habit of sleeping with another person!
Henry was asking me if this is a cultural thing in the Philippines. Do women here sleep with other people like this? Is it common? Luckily, I have some experience with this myself. If you watch the video, you will see what happened to me, but I fixed the problem! I think Henry can too!
At the start of my video, I give an update about Feyma and her work in the United States. For those who have not been following along, my wife, Feyma, has been working in Alaska for the past few months. I miss her and it looks like she will be coming home soon, I can’t wait to see her again! She is currently working on processing King Crab in Alaska, but the King Crab season will be ending soon, and after the season ends she will be back in Davao City!
Henry and his Girlfriend
So, what do you think about Henry’s girlfriend sleeping with somebody else? Were you surprised? I bet you were!
Do You Have a Question?
If you want to send a question for inclusion in a future Podcast, just use the app below, click on the button below, where it says “Start Recording”.
Questions submitted by email will no longer be answered, you must submit through the voice message above.
Thanks again for watching, everybody!
This page is getting NSFW
not a surprise…either cultural nor just plain a player if the other person has more mula :-).
It is pretty unwise to make a comment on something you know nothing about. If you watch the video you will learn that the title of the article leads you to think one thing… but though the title is totally accurate, the meaning is quite opposite of what you think it is. LOL
If you think it is NSFW you must not have watched the video and have really no idea of what I am talking about ! Ha ha…
I watched it Bob before the comment and actually figured it was a child before watching it. I was referring to the picture used to lure people in.
LOL, OK, Steve. No problem.
NSFW?
Not Safe For Work
what really throws a wrench in the situation is the someone else is a another woman. ( cue the drama music ……) 🙂
Well… based on your comment, I don’t think you watched the video and don’t know what he really told me! Ha ha….
But my story makes more fun LOL 🙂
May be more fun, but has nothing to do with the content! 🙂
You’re correct – this is a cultural issue. Our daughters (8 y/o and 4 y/o) still come upstairs to sleep with us sometimes – the younger one more than the older one now. We try to convince the 8 y/o that she’s a big girl now and that she should sleep downstairs with her Ates (her cousins/aunt/unrelated young people for whom we provide a home), and she is becoming more accustomed to this.
My advice is that, as foreigners in this country, we have to accept the local customs and habits – we don’t have the right to force our own expectations on the Filipinos. Just go with it!
Thanks for sharing your thoughts, Peter.
I don’t 100% agree with you about the “this is not our country so we should not interfere”. Usually, I am 100% behind that. However, this is not really something that is out in public among the masses of people.. this is a personal issue between a husband and a wife, and something that should be worked out between the two people. Just like I would not expect the wife, if the couple moved to the husband’s home country, to give up all of her culture. There should be a middle ground. But, that is only a mild disagreement, and I agree with the overall direction of your comment.
Jeez I feel for the guy, I really do.
Best to watch the video so you know the REAL story. The title of the article is true, but not what you would expect.
That’s quite common there. Grown daughters sleep with their mothers when they are twenty and not married. Cousins sleep in the same bed too.
Yep, correct.
This is very common for the child to sleep in the same bed. I think the reason is because of the poverty. Many people here are poor and was brought up in a home that, perhaps was one single room. So sleeping in the same room for your entire life might be the norm for most any family here.
Yes, it is common.
Yes, this is very common here in the Philippines and I believe I know why. The answer is very simple. Most people in the Philippines is poor and very poor and often with a big family as Bob eludes to. Often people here live in a single room dwelling. Or the place may not have enough rooms so that everyone has their own rooms so sleeping with others is very common. You should not worry. Just do as Bob says and push a little at a time to get your bed back.
My feelings exactly.
Sorry for the double post Bob, my internet is very slow at the moment.
Understood. No problem.
When I moved to The Philippines with my Filipina wife a year ago, her daughter (age 14) came to live with us. My wife wanted her daughter to sleep with us but I found it totally unacceptable and refused. Sometimes the daughter slept in our room on a camp bed but I told the daughter I did not think it was necessary. Now sometimes her mother sleeps with her in her own room, but I notice that the frequency is declining. I am aware that at age 13 the daughter was sleeping with her father and I did not like that one little bit. I am also aware that people here like to play with the nipples of their mothers/grandmothers, even when the person doing it is quite adult. Perhaps they have the idea of certain behaviours being acceptable on a non-sexual innocent level which Western countries have lost.
I have never heard of the nipple thing. I guess I am leading a sheltered life!
Or perhaps I have married into the only nipple-touching family in The Philippines!
I can’t say, I just know I have never heard of it before. 🙂
Yours is not the only family. :o)
Sir Bob: the nipple is the bit on the end of the breasts. Pleased to be of help. 🙂
Although communial sleeping is very common in the Philippines I do wonder if it’s class related, common amongst the the poorer families where they may only have a single room for sleeping but less or uncommon amongst the middle and upper classes.
I would imagine that is at least partially true. Upper class people are more exposed to the outside world.
Hello Bob,
We went through the same thing. The gradual approach worked best for all concerned.
The communal sleeping arrangements happen less frequently now. Most all of our close family has been in the US or Europe for a few decades now. But early on, it was not unusual at all, when visiting, or being visited, for everyone to simply pile in together on the living room rug.
Take care,
Pete
Hi Pete. I think there is a real key word in what you said. Gradual. Anytime you want to make a life change or want somebody else in your life to do that, making gradual moves is the only way to successfully do that. Also, it is usually a matter of both sides making gradual moves to some point in the middle.
Thanks for sharing your thoughts and experiences.
Bob;
Because of my job on ships, it never really happened with Mayang the girls when very tiny albeit on their own the would sneak into out room. I would wake up with little feet in my face. As they aged they had a bedroom each, but slept together in one room. My Granddaughter and grandson would always nap with me when visiting. When traveling we book a family room where my daughter, her husband granddaughter and Mayang and I were all in the same room. That took awhile for me to get used to.And my son-in-law and I had to vacate the room, (Coffee Time) when the ladies get ready for the day. Now I consider it odd, but fun but it is the Filipino way, and we’ll never change it. Liberals would be shocked!!!