Last week, I was riding the jeepney, on my way to go for a swimming session. I used to swim nearly every day for years, but got out of the habit when my swimming partner moved back to the States. I’ve been wanting to get back into the habit, because it is great exercise for me, and I enjoy it a lot.
Like many times, when riding the jeepney, my mind wandered into deep thought. You never know what I may think about, it could be any subject. During this kind of time, I often come up with some pretty good ideas for articles here on the Live in the Philippines Web Magazine. On this particular day, I came up with an idea for a series of articles.
I thought about how my life in the Philippines could be broken up into “seasons.” Certain years were good, other years presented me with challenges. Overall, my life in the Philippines has been good, it’s been enjoyable, and I’ve loved it. I believe that I will continue to enjoy my home in the Philippines. That, however, does not mean that life is perfect here in the Philippines. That is why I often tell people that the Philippines is not paradise, and never will be. No, there are definitely problems here and there are good things as well.
So, over the coming weeks, I will be writing a series of articles which will come under the heading “Seasons in the sun.” I call it this because I find that I can split up my years here into very defined “seasons” living here in the Philippine sun.
Seasons come and go. Seasons even repeat. We don’t have clearly defined seasons here where I live, although up north they have a fairly clearly defined wet season and dry season. Here in Davao, we have fairly constant weather throughout the year, although it may be a few degrees warmer during the summer months. But, the seasons in my life are not defined by how the weather is. No, the seasons I have in mind would be defined by difficult years of adjustment, productive business years, challenging periods and settling in and enjoying life.
What season am I living now? It’s hard to say for certain, I am still evaluating that. In many ways, I am feeling like life is good, challenges are few, and I’m just enjoying myself in the Philippines. As I write these future articles on the topic, I know that I will form more gelled opinions on what seasons I’ve experienced in the Philippines, and what season I am currently enjoying.
One thing that also kind of ties in with this line of thought is that I hear the same thing from so many people who visit here and hope to move here in the future. They are experiencing perpetual winter, and hoping to move here and enjoy a little bit of summer! Their winter is not only cold weather, although that is certainly a big reason why many of them want to move here. But it is “cold” in more ways than just the temperature. They hate their jobs, face challenges coming to grips with the society that has changed so much over the years, etc.
One thing a lot of these folks notice when they come to the Philippines is that society is much more similar to the society in their childhood memories, and they long to move here to be back in an era where they feel more comfortable. Well, there is truth in that, but there is also an aspect of false expectations. False expectations because many people feel that Philippine living is “just like the USA was 50 years ago.” Well, in some ways that is true, but in many ways it is as far from the truth as you can get. Things are different here. Very different. But, if you just come and visit for 2 weeks or a month, you may not recognize those differences. If you come here and live permanently, those differences will become your nemesis day in and day out… until you learn to accept the differences, and become comfortable with life in the Philippines.
So, look out for my upcoming series of articles, Seasons in the Sun, and let me tell you what seasons I have experienced in my years of living in the Philippines. Maybe you will learn a thing or two about life here. Then again, maybe you will share a thing or two with me, and teach me something. I’m open to that.
wow bob that song is a blast from the past.i was so young when this song came out.it was a big hit when i was in first or second grade in school .the guy that sang the song played on a tv show called sigmen and the sea monster lol haven’t thought about that iin years.as always i will be waiting for your next story bob and thanks for making me feel old 🙂
Ha ha, Tim, we are both getting old! But, hang in there, we both have a few years left in us, my friend!
Bob;
Like you say, there have been both ups and downs in our living here. But when put it on to the scales of life, I’ve found that the ups outweigh the downs by a large margin. Perfection, it doesn’t exist anywhere on Earth, so I stopped searching. But I’ve found my own happiness here, some will also find it but many won’t. One must take the Philippines as it is offered to us, as it won’t change to please us. True it’s not paradise, but for me, it’ll do for now and hopefully in my future.
I look forward to reading your perspective on your Seasons in the Sun!
Hi Paul – You know, it’s funny that I hear so much negative from so many expats. They complain a lot about life in the Philippines. But, others, like you and I, we enjoy it here, and enjoy our lives. But, as you have said many times, even if we offer to give them a ride to the airport, they don’t want to leave! ha ha…
Like you, I have had my good years and bad, but the good is far, far more than the bad. I hope we both keep enjoying our lives! If we don’t, then it’s time to find our next adventure. I am pretty sure, though, that the rest of my adventures will all happen in the Philippines. 😉
Hi Bob – Forgive me in advance for the long post. But this story which I sourced from the net has been around for some time and has relevance to this topic. It is a metaphorical story about attitude, but holds simple truths about attitude and perspective that all expats can benefit from. Even though it is a simple story, it always seems to impact my perspective.
THE TWO TRAVELLERS
There was once a traveller who was walking from a village in the mountains to a village in the valley.
As he walked along, he saw a monk working in a field, so he stopped and said to the monk, “I’m on my way to the village in the valley, can you tell me what it’s like?”
The monk looked up from his labour and asked the man where he had come from.
The man responded, “I have come from the village in the mountains.”
“What was that like?” the monk asked.
“Terrible!” the man exclaimed, “no-one spoke my language, I had to sleep on a dirt floor in one of their houses, they fed me some sort of stew that had yak or dog or both in it and the weather was atrocious.”
“Then I think that you will find that the village in the valley is much the same,” the monk noted.
A few hours later another traveller passed by and he said to the monk, “I am on my way to the village in the valley, can you tell what it’s like?”
“Where have you come from?” enquired the monk.
“I have come from the village in the mountains.”
“And what was that like?”
“It was awesome!” the man replied, “No-one spoke my language so we had to communicate using our hands and facial expressions. I had to sleep on the dirt floor which was really cool as I’ve never done that before. They fed me some sort of weird stew and I have no idea what was in it but just to experience how the locals lived was great and the weather was freezing cold, which meant that I really got a taste of the local conditions. It was one of the best experiences of my life.”
“Then I think that you’ll find that the village in the valley is much the same,” responded the monk.
Hi Brenton – I have heard that story before, but it’s been quite a while since I’ve heard it. It is a good story, and ties right in with my comments to Paul earlier.
A lot of life in a different country depends on our perspective, there is no doubt on that!
Hi Bob – Your comment to Paul reminds me of the time I did an apprenticeship. Many of the workers continually complained how bad it was working at the company, how much of a mongrel the boss was, how poor they were paid and how much more recognition they deserve etc (A similar style of attitude to some expats living here). I was only 18 at the time, but would say “If things are so bad why don’t you just quit right now?” (A similar response to offering to drive expats to the airport). My colleagues would look at me funny almost every time I asked them that question. In many ways it is in a way easier to complain then we don’t have to change.
Ha ha, sounds so familiar, Brenton.
Bob,
Life is what you make of it no matter where you live. Looking forward to your upcoming articles. Have a wonderful day!
Hi Papa Duck – the difference, though is that if you move to a foreign country there are lots of additional considerations. Exchange rates impact you financially. Cultural adjustments affect you, etc. Those things are not really a factor in life for those who stay in their home country.
I dont recall where I read it, maybe a Covey book, but one thing that always sticks with was a sentence-” Its not where you are, its who you are”
Lots of truth in that statement, Bill. But, where you are can also throw a few curve calls that test the person who you are.
I for one have found living here more peaceful and tranquil…..it;’s mostly because of the reason I came here in the first place…it’s a word called Love”””..It’s hard to imagine finding a younger woman ….such as a lot of us have here in Philly…..because as we all know…………. it would be very hard to do so …. at least in the U S …. not impossible but tougher……I for one … would not want a older woman for my wife … as she would be too set in her ways……being with a younger woman … I can adjust her to my ways of life and feel much more comfortable ……… and also for me it helps me stay young .. as I have never grown up and still do the same things as I did as a young man…..All thru the years I have mingled and partied and kept friends with much younger people … and talked their talk…it’s just the way I am…..Yes…living here has really been like the days of growing up…. I have always thought it’s because of one reason “Modernization”” You see the differenace in Manila the big city and how the people are there …not as layed back as they are in the other provinces and smaller communities… upbringing seems to have a lot to do with this…..But I have fell in Love here in many different ways and can not say nothing terrible about anything here …..as nothing gets under my skin that easily …. and if you can adjust to life here in this manner you can have a beautiful life………
Hi Lenny – I have had periods in my time living in the Philippines where it was far from tranquil, and my life was not happy. I have learned to live with and enjoy life here, though, and am very happy with my life now. Thanks for leaving your comment!
intresting take on looking at life. nice one Bob
Thanks, James.
Dang it Bob, now I have that song stuck in my head. 😛
Ha ha, I hate it when that happens!
Your last paragraph about false expectations rings very true. A lot of the things I thought of as cute and endearing during visits have long since lost those qualities. It is different, often maddeningly frustrating, and not likely to change much in our lifetimes. A good part of being happy here is accepting that. Looking forward to other Seasons.
Hi Mike – I think you are right.. “cute things” can become burdensome or troublesome if they are permanent fixtures in our lives. Maybe things that we could tolerate or even enjoy while vacationing would turn out to be intolerable if they become permanent fixtures in our lives. Learning to accept what is on things that we cannot change is a big step toward happiness in our Philippine lives.