I saw this post on my news feed on my FB. It’s something for the family here to think about. Maybe they will lower the high expectations of the loved ones they have abroad. It’s a thought provoking message especially to those OFW in the States and other parts in the world. Living here for a long time I hear often some of the comments below from the family here and the person that lived abroad. I just hope that the family here will value the sacrifices that those family they have abroad.
We know a lot of people here in the Philippines who have family members working abroad.
How arout you? Do you know Filipinos or others who are living abroad to support their family? Even some foreigners live like that, even a number of LiP readers who come to mind.
Maybe some of you experience some member of family that had high expectations. Feel free to share here. I’ve heard too many stories here and while I was there too.
*** Not really easy to translate ***
It was written in Tagalog. I will try to translate the best way I could.
Para sa inyo na akala mayaman kaming nasa America!!! Basahin mo mabuti ito ng maintindihan mo ang buhay namin dito!!!
BUHAY AMERIKA
Lahat ng sinabi niya nakakatuwa at TOTOO!!!
Akala ng mga tao na nasa Pilipinas kapag nasa America ka akala nila madami ka ng pera.
Akala nila mayaman ka na kase may kotse ka na. Ang totoo , kapag hindi ka bumili ng kotse sa America
maglalakad ka ng milya-milya sa ilalim ng init ng araw o kaya sa snow. Walang jeepney , tricycle o padyak sa America …
Akala nila masarap ang buhay dito sa America .. Ang totoo , puro ka trabaho kase pag di ka nagtrabaho , wala kang pangbayad ng bills mo sa kotse , credit
card , ilaw , tubig , insurance , bahay at iba pa. Hindi ka na pwedeng tumambay sa kapitbahay kase busy din sila
maghanap buhay pangbayad ng bills nila.
Akala nila masaya ka kase nagpadala ka ng picture mo sa Disneyland , Seaworld , Six Flags , Universal Studios at iba
pang attractions. Ang totoo , kailangan mo ngumiti kase nagbayad ka ng $70+ para makarating ka dun , kailangan mo na naman ang 10 hours na sweldo mong
pinangbayad sa ticket.
Akala nila malaki na ang kinikita mo kase dolyar na sweldo mo. Ang totoo , malaki pagpinalit mo ng peso , pero
dolyar din ang gastos mo sa America . Ibig sabihin ang dolyar mong kinita sa presyong dolyar mo din gagastusin.
Ang P15.00 na sardinas sa Pilipinas $1.00 sa America , ang isang pakete ng sigarilyo sa pilipinas P40.00 , sa
America $ 6.50 , ang upa mo sa bahay na P10 , 000 sa Pilipinas , sa America $1 , 000++.
Akala nila buhay milyonaryo ka na kase ang ganda ng bahay at kotse mo. Ang totoo milyon ang utang mo. Ang bago mong kotse 5 taon mong huhulugan. Ang bahay 30 taon mong huhulugan. Ibig sabihin , alipin ka ng bahay at kotse mo.
Madaming naghahangad na makarating sa America ..mahirap maging normal na manggagawa sa Pilipinas. Madalas pagod ka sa trabaho. Pag dating ng sweldo mo , kulang pa sa pagkain mo. Pero ganun din sa ibang bansa katulad ng America ….
Hindi ibig sabihin dolyar na ang sweldo mo , yayaman ka na , kailangan mo ding magbanat ng buto para mabuhay ka sa ibang bansa.
Isang malaking sakripisyo ang pag alis mo sa bansang pinagsilangan at malungkot iwanan ang mga mahal mo sa buhay.Hindi pinupulot ang pera dito o pinipitas. Hindi ako naninira ng pangarap , gusto ko lang buksan ang bintana ng katotohanan
Ang bottom line para sa akin ay
THERE’S NO PLACE LIKE HOME ,
PHILIPPINES MY PHILIPPINES ,
BABALIK KA RIN PAGTANDA MO AT DUON MO UUBUSIN ANG NATITIRA SA BUHAY MO SA ATING BANSANG SINILANGAN.
Pero pag retired ka na at dala mo dolyar mo sa Pilipinas mas maganda lalo kung palainum ka ng kape. Dun sa Pinas, voice activated ang coffee maker. Mag salita ka lang ng “Inday, kape nga dyan!” Lumalapit ang kape sa iyo at alam na alam pa nga timpla mo!
Translations:
For you that thought that all of us here in America are rich!!! Please read this carefully so that you understand the way we live here.
Life in America!
All that said were in fun and truth !!!
Most people in the Philippines thinks if you are from USA that you are loaded with money.They think that you are rich since you own a car. People there did not realized if you don’t have a car in America, then you will walk miles and miles under the heat of the sun or the snow. No jeepneys or tryicycles or trisikad in the States.
They thought it’s a bed of roses there in the States. The truth, you had to work hard really hard, if you don’t work there then you don’t have the money to pay for your bills for your car, credit cards, electricity, water, insurance, housing and and the list goes on and on. There you can’t just hang out with your neighbors house. They too are very busy working to earn a living.
If you sent pictures to your loved ones in the Philippines, that you’ve been to Disneyland, Seaworld, Six Flags, Universal Studios and other tourist spot. You need to smile because you paid over $70+ for you to be there. On top of that you need the 10 hour paycheck for your ticket.
They think you had so much money because you earn in dollars. Yes the peso exchange rate’s high, but being in America your expenses are in dollars too. You earn in dollars, then you will spend in dollars too. Just like the sardines in the Philippines it cost P15, in America sardines cost $1.00. A pack of cigarettes in the Philippines cost P40.00, In America it cost $6.50. For a house rental in the Philippines it’s P10k, in America $1,000 ++.
They think you’re a millionaire because you had fancy house and car. They didn’t know that you owe millions in peso for your car, 5 years to pay maybe. The house maybe 30 years to pay. Means you are a slave of your house and car and other material things.
So many people wanting and wishing to live in America. (understandable since pay for workers here are low) It’s difficult to be a normal employee in the Philippines. Often times too tired of working, then when the paycheck comes it might be enough for food. If your earning dollar, it doesn’t mean to say that you are already rich. Living abroad you have to work really hard (not too many family will help out).
It’s a big sacrifice to get out of the land you are born with. It gets lonely to be away from your loved one.
You can’t just pick the money in the trees there in the States. Have to work really hard. Just trying to be truthful.
The bottom line. There’s no place like home, My Philippines. Whenever you get older you will return and bring your hard earned dollar in the Philippines. You will spend the rest of your days to the place where your born.
Side note: When your into coffee. In the Philippines you will have a voice activated coffee maker. You will just say “Inday, coffee please” Then the coffee will come to you and it’s also to your liking. Lol
I am very saddened to hear of Bobs Eye condition.He is a wonderful person who helps every one to live the dream of living here.Sure hope there is a way he can regain sight in his left eye.
Thank you Alan, I appreciate your thoughts.
Hi Alan – thank you so much for your nice thoughts. We highly appreciate that. We are praying for the best of Bob.
Nice to see you here. Take care!
Wow, so true Feyma. The dollar really goes far in the phils but not so much here, especially when everything is so expensive. And I live in Los Angeles where taxes are among the highest and things cost the most!
However I’m truly happy that when I send money to buy or help for something in the phils, it goes really far. And though she never asks for any of it, my future wife appreciates it like no other 🙂 it’s why so many sacrifice working over seas, family is paramount .
Hi OpaoPhil – yep the dollar does goes a long way here especially the if family knows how to spend it wisely.
Glad that your loved one in the Philippines appreciate your effort in sending her the money. Yes, many do appreciate the gestures too.
Thank you so much for stopping by!
For all those who thought all Americans are rich, I confess that I am not. Though, the future, while uncertain, holds great promise.
Thanks for your article!
Hi Byron – Plenty of people will say the same thing too. Problem is it’s already engrave in the many minds of people here that America is the best and rich country in the world.
Thank you for sharing. Have a great day!
Two Filipinos arrived at New York, JFK airport and as soon as they stepped out of the airport one of them saw a $20 bill lying on the sidewalk.
As he was about to bend down to pick it up, the other one said; ah…, let’s rest first, we’ll pass this one, we’ll start picking them up tomorrow…
Oh my God! This post has struck a REALLY RAW nerve with me. I am going to be totally blunt on this issue. I love filipinos. I really really really do.
But far too many filipinos, that live in the Philippines, have it totally wrong. They think every person from America, the UK, Canada, Austrailia, or wherever has a lot of money.
To them we might have a lot of money, but in reality many of us don’t for the reasons the letter mentioned. Cost in our country are MUCH MUCH higher.
I have a lot of filipino friends in America, and almost all of them want to come back to the Philippines. They miss their moms and dads, and brothers and sisters, and all the friends they grew up with.
But they stay in America…to help their family. And soooooooooo many times their families just keep on asking and asking and asking…it is shameful in my opinion. Just shameful.
Instead of filipinos, many of them but not all, sitting around all day waiting for relatives to send them money, they need to get up and do SOMETHING to make some money and help.
Make some fishballs and sell them. Make some siomai and sell it. Sell some mango. Wash clothes for neighbors. Do something! Don’t just sit around and wait for family members overseas to send money.
I have seen first hand the sacrifices of so many OFW’s. The sadness in their eyes when I mention Christmas in the Philippines. The sadness when I mention a certain fiesta I might have gone to. They want, many of them, so bad to be back in the Philippines with their families. But they stay in America, and other places, to help their families.
Many filipinos need to STOP thinking that everyone in other countries have a lot of money, it’s not true! Heck, many Americans like myself actually don’t have that much money.
I live part time in Makati Manila. It really appalls me how many times during the day I am asked for money. It is like all filipinos think I am loaded. And I do help out as much as I can but this attitude of just constantly asking for money or thinking I can spare them extra money all the times irritates the hell out of me.
This idea that every filipino is jumping-for-joy-happy in America is simply not true. So many want to come home. They have told me. But they can’t because they have to take care of mom and dad, and 12 other siblings. Ridiculous. People need to learn to take care of themselves here much better.
And for those of you that don’t think I understand how tough it is here in the Philippines. Yes I do. I have lived here. I lived in a very poor area in Mindanao. I saw the struggles. I see the stuggles from my fiances family. I see the struggles here in Makati. I get it.
But I also understand that when a filipino is holding their hand out to get money from a loved one working overseas, they probably shouldn’t be getting drunk 5 nights a week on Red Horse. Comprende?
I have so much respect for filipinos that go abroad and do what they can for their families, and I really hate it when I see filipinos just expect to be handed money by their hard working relatives that work overseas.
Could not agree more.
I know I will get a lot of flak in what I will write but here is my take on this:
I think it’s the Filipino coming home (not all) who perpetuate this myth you see them with their trendy clothes, flashy jewelry, expensive watch and gadgets, branded bags and shoes. Going in debts just to bring gifts for everybody, having a party left and right so of course people who sees them think my god they are rich and living my dream. I have lived abroad for almost 13years but from the onset I managed the money I send home I only give to the children as the parents work we sent the kids to school but always with condition we pay the tuition the parents pay the everyday needs of the child that way they are taught not to depend on us. We sent money 2x a year opening and closing of classes, Christmas is extra and limited and budgeted to each. No monthly dole outs.My mom lived on 3 pensions so not in need of financial support but we pay for any medical bills incurred including that of my siblings. We go home every 2years and the gifts I brought are always bought on sale and on cash. I do not flash my jewels and gadgets when I’m at home, people will only notice that I come from abroad when I opened my mouth. I know how wrong the misconception is but I think Filipinos abroad should also partly take the blame and be responsible enough to educate the people left behind.
PS: Kindly give my best wishes to Bob he is on my prayers list. Take care both of you.
Gezel, you certainly will not get a lot of flak from me. I agree with what you said. I have seen so many times OFW’s and filipinas married to American men that actually don’t have much money put on “the show” for family members.
They really cannot afford to to this, but it is like it is expected. So yes, the OFW and person married to the foreigner does bare some responsibility for the issues.
I really wish more OFW’s would put their foot down and set the rules and stick to them. You are not all rich, you work hard for your money and you shouldn’t have to put on a show for family members to think you are successful.
Todd and grezel I so agree but you are just knocking your heads against a wall. Try and explain that you are not rich and expenses are huge abroad and all you will get is the 1000 yard stare.
Mrs Feyma,
OFW’s due more harm than help the Philippines. There families rely on the money and have no incentive to work and give the economy false growth. I’ve seen OFW’s work for years and when they retire they have nothing to show for years of hard work. The biggest thing though is the time away from there families which really affects the children.
Much of this have to do with “saving face”. The OFW comes back to the phils and must brings gifts and look “western” to show that they are really doing well.
The filipina who moved from the province to the city to work at the call center will spend more than she earns on gifts when returning to the province to look a certain way to her family. When this happens of course the family will want more.
Its a vicious cycle.
Willie, you are EXACTLY right. I have seen so many filipinos put on “the show” to make their families think they are living high off the hog in America or wherever…when in actuality it is not true.
Great article!!! I have heard so many sad stories about OFWs and Filipinas marrying “foreigners” falling victim to the cash grabbing families back home. Some are ignorant of the money situation in foreign countries, some don’t care and are just greedy and will gladly take and spend all you give them. Some are hardworking upstanding Filipinos who will really appreciate and do good things with the extra cash sent. The trick is not to send too much money as it just provides a platform for laziness and greed. My wife and I once talked to a Filipina who worked as a cleaning lady at the airport near us. She said she hadn’t been home in over 30 years because she was supporting her brothers and sisters, every paycheck went back home. She didn’t even have the money to go back home when her parents died. smh
Rodrigo, this article certainly hit a nerve with me like it has with many and your comment about the lady not going home for 30 years hit even more of a nerve.
Where I live a number of filipinas work at Wal Mart. They have become my friends and many have not been home for many many years. We all know that Wal Mart does not pay real well.
These filipinas so badly want to go home, but can’t because they are spending all of their money to help their families back here in the Philippines. I understand the need here, I really do. But filipinos that are in the Philippines simply need to stop asking for money so much. Not all do, but we all know that many do.
I have a friend here in Makati. She works as a bar girl and HATES it. She wants to go to college but she can’t because she has a mom and dad and 11 siblings she is trying to take care of! She can barely take care of herself yet her family is always DEMANDING more from her. This young lady is so sad most of the time.
Her family should be ashamed they put that much pressure on a 22 year old. It is really disgusting.
Hi Te Feyma
A pinay I know was so excited to finally have a holiday in pinas after so many years of saving for airfares. She then got told by her mom that she should just send that holiday money to them instead of coming home! Well she was really hurt which I truly understood! She still went home anyway after all, she said family is family. But my goodness what was her mom thinking? Sad just sad.
Also, I agree with the other comments above. SOME of these OFW’s or Filipinos living abroad do show off a lot. No wonder others there in pinas think that they are loaded.
The best thing to do in my opinion is to be honest to these family and friends in the Philippines about your real situation abroad. If they truly care for you then they will understand. if they don’t, well time to stop that contact with them.
All I can say… is your right Feyma…But in addition the comfort here…. the friendliness here… and tranquility here money can not buy
I find myself on both sides because the nature of my business. In the beginning back in 2009, I lived in Manila briefly and I achingly missed my son. I cried myself to sleep almost every day. I missed my life in America, but at the time, the “Great Recession” hit and I was laid off from the job I had for 13 years. I’m a single Mom with nobody to lean on. Not my parents, definitely not my ex-husband. But I’ve always had an idea, a dream, some money saved up and took the plunge.
Now, I’m back to living mostly in America again & again, it’s because the nature of my business. LIfe is definitely much better and I could see my son. Although, I still go back & forth from USA to Manila.
With that history, I can say that I can relate what OFWs feel like. Although the separation time from my son was not as long as some OFWs, I felt the pain, the longing, the loneliness, and the tears many are going through. My heart goes out to them everyday that’s why I’m passionate about what I’m doing. If I could help 1 OFW or prevent anybody from becoming one, I would be happy, but not content. Thank you Bob. I pray for you and hope that you are well.
Feyma,
What you translated is so true. The other day someone I’d never met, a Filipino, said he needed 4,000 pesos. Not 40. Not 4 but 4,000 pesos.
I told him politely to ask someone else. Good Grief.
They really think foreigners are made of money.
I somewhat agree life is not easy when leaving family behind and move to the states. It was heart breaking when I got separated from my family and friends. Anywhere you go, money is hard to earn, and it is even harder to save and invest. Anywhere you go, the kind of work you do dictates your level of income. If you work in the factory or retail stores you make less and if you work as a professional you make more. At least here in the states, the standard of living is way above than the Philippines. I was able to buy my own house, save for retirement, send my kids to college, and help my family in the Philippines. It is not bad to dream to come here if you have education, you will be rewarded than in the Philippines. Be in the field of computer science and software, health care, technology, etc. You can never go wrong by being educated. I shop for new clothes and buy gifts for my family and friends whenever I visit my hometown. Nothing wrong with that for as long you can earn it back and make them happy.
I dream of returning home in the Philippines after my kids finish college in the states, this will be an early retirement in my mid 50s. That I can never afford to retire at that age if I did not go abroad. Do not make it look life is easy in the Philippines, I am thankful to be in America. I sent money to my mother when she was on dialysis in the Philippines because she has no medical insurance, and now I am helping my yaya for her chemo. Those I cannot afford to help if I am working in the Philippines as an engineer. Being an engineer in the states will let’s me buy a house, and save for retirement. Much even better I am here in the Bay Area California that the equity of my house is 3x more the value since I bought it.
There is success stories in the states from filipino immigrants, don’t make it look bad because it not. It is all up to individual how they handle money. Anywhere you go, life is not easy but you have a better chance here. Cheers