I’ve had this post sitting around “un-done” in my drafts folder for some time. Today I was housecleaning (disk cleaning) and I decided to make something out of it rather than giving it the old heave ho.
It’s my thought that many of you are reading here for many different reasons, but the various reasons can often be lumped into one general category … entertainment. Let me be quick to say there is nothing wrong at all with any of these particular sub-categories, but perhaps giving a little thought to why you are really here can help make the experience a bit better for you and even to get a little more out of the Live in the Philippines Web Magazine and the efforts of those who make it happen. I’m including a broad category of things in ‘entertainment’:
- Diversions – Anything that makes you forget the pain of your “little life”. Hmm, to call most people’s like “little” sounds a bit demeaning, but then again, we all of us are pretty much just small cogs on some giant wheels. I myself sometimes get a bit sad with some of the interactions I have with folks who are in the “Interested in the Philippines” group because there are many out there who come across, to me at least, as being very unhappy with their lives and have somehow focused on the Philippines as being the one spark of hope that will someday make them feel happy and fulfilled. Everyone needs to believe in something, but if this is you … something I have learned the hard way in this life we all share … if you are unhappy in country X or country Y, you are very likely to be unhappy here in the Philippines as well. One thing you can definitely do, right now, today at a cost of absolutely nothing, is to start looking for the important things in your life. Changing countries won’t fix what’s wrong, only changing ‘you’ inside will. Don’t let the diversionary thought of “someday” making the move blind you from the fact that personal unhappiness usually climbs right in the box with the rest of your possessions when you move … wherever you go, there you are.
- Distractions – Anything that provides an easy-reason to not deal with what is in front of you. This is the one I certainly identify with very strongly. If I let myself slip into the “woulda, coulda, shoulda” mode there’s no doubt I could have made the move here way sooner in my life and been a lot more settled in already. If you’re just dropping by to pass the time for a while, no problem, glad to have you. But if you think for sure you want to make the move and you aren’t doing something, each and every day to make the move happen, leave now, go directly to your “to do” list (you do have one, right?) and get a couple items crossed off before you come back. Distractions cause more delay and difficulty than any of the commonly stated problems like money, health, family and such ever do.
- Aggravation – Reading news or views that make you mad or get you jacked up (many find this a great pick-me-up in the afternoons at work, I’m told). Some of us seem totally driven by dissatisfaction. If this is you, I can’t really say you are in the wrong place, but then again, please don’t try to drag me into it. In general terms my life is quite satisfactory …has been for years. I really don’t care who is in the White House, or in Malacañang Palace for that matter.
You’d be surprised how in my view, after 60 years of being aware of the news and how the world is being run, things aren’t really all that different.
I clearly remember President Truman address the nation about why we had to fight again in Korea to ‘make the world safe for democracy’ and get those rascally and aggressive North Koreans under control once and for all … good thing we accomplished that goal, eh?
I also clearly remember President Eisenhower making speeches and even radio commercials telling us that “We Auto Buy Now” to pump up a tottering auto industry which couldn’t figure out how to sell cars that Americans would buy. Check that problem off too, we fixed it, didn’t we? … or was that our current leader I saw other night hawking long-term auto warranties backed by the federal government? … naw, that must have been a dream from the past.
My point is, not to discuss current politics, but to try to help you see that the more things change, the more they stay the same. If you are really unhappy about how the world is being run today, or any of its particular countries, instead of getting yourself all wound up, just relax and take a deep breath. Things are going to change, but in the long run, they pretty much all even out. Regardless of how strongly you feel about politics, social injustice, religion or any other “shibboleth” you may be personally attached to, a move to the Philippines is unlikely to make and difference, pro or con.
A week or two ago I read a comment to one of Bob’s articles about stress. The fellow making the comment was in the US and the way he worded his concerns he really made me feel quite sorry for him. He was terribly concerned about “the horrible way the US was being run right now” and how life as we know it was probably in a death spiral … and even sadder he seemed to feel it was his personal responsibility to save us all from the impending crash.
Thank God I don’t have any immense responsibilities like that weighing me down … I’m just a little grain of sand on a gigantic beach myself … only a few other grains of sand even know I am here, and when I’m gone, very few will even know it, much less care.
OK so, that’s a few of the reasons I think some of us are reading (and perhaps writing) about the Philippines. Did I hit any chords that resonated with you? Or am I all wet and crazy as a mad hatter? Anyone care to share why they are here?
Dave, you got that right on the button buddy. In fact, there's an old biblical story about some guy standing outside the entrance to a town advising arrivers that they will find this town exactly the same as they found their last town. Some get told that it's a great town with friendly people, others that it's a crap town with real rotten residents, depending on how they said they found their last town.(Ok, that's a condensation of the story, and it's probably the extent of my religious knowledge).
Yup, happiness begins when you find a way to dump the things that make you unhappy and hold you back. Now, having said that, and understood it, I'm still looking for the practical ways to actually do it myself, but things are getting crossed off the list regularly…
Hi Dave
Another reason to read these blogs, I am planning to move to the Philippines early next year, and am obviously very interested in reading what people (who have actual experience of living there) have to say, good or bad.
I understand and accept that it is no good thinking with your head in the clouds wearing rose coloured glasses. If people think their town is full of scoundrel, thiefs and untrustworthy people, I'm sure they will think that of every town (as Jim Hannah says).
The more I read about living in the Philippines, the more I think I'm making the correct choice. I know life won't be the same as it is here in the UK, and I don't expect it to be. Although I've been to the Philippines many times on holiday, and been involved in some business ventures, it's not the same as being there 24/7. People's personel experiences and local knowledge is very interesting for a newbie like me.
At the end of the day, the world will keep revolving whether we're here or not 🙂
Hi Dave, I read LIP because I'm looking to experience, learn, and share the joy of the place that I've had a love affair with for a long time. I feel that I'm a quite blessed and happy person for the most part, be it here or in the US, because as you seem to be saying, happiness is a "state of mind" and when anyone goes from one place to another that "state of mind" goes with them. Sadly though, when reading lately here, or trying to contribute, sometimes I get a feeling that I'm talking about a totally different place than a lot of people know or imagine.Please let me know– is there a audience for discussion about "rosy" views or am I just a dinosaur that besides a few others might agree with me (some being Pilipinos' themselves here I think) would prefer to focus on the "real topics", all the negatives and inadequacies that they perceive to exist? Let me say that I'm no polyanna, and can be jaded at times, but I hope that many don't want to come to the Philippines to only live "cheaply" and in "a warm climate", but isolated from the people and experiences that make this particular country unique. Is the Philippines to many what they perceive to be another Costa Rica or Panama where one can live "cheaply" and "comfortably", isolated from everyone but their fellow expatriots? If that's the case, I think that you do the Philippines and yourselves a disservice.
Hellow Dave.Fresh tuna at four dollars a kilo,beer at thirty six cents a bottle,a dollar for a bottle of rum,a dollar or two for a movie you can watch all day,very low land taxes,no insurence payment on your house,one hundred a year for car insurence,scuba diving and the locals are friendly all in a beautiful tropical setting.Im here to stay.Jim.
Well, you know why I am here. I miss my country obviously. But I find that 'my country' to me really means my people, my loved ones and our practices, not necessarily the Philippine land nor the sky above it.
I also find it interesting to know and learn about how expats see the Philippines and the Filipinos.
Finally, I'd like to learn from the experiences of tourists or expats so maybe I can help Jeff and the kids have the best of time whenever we go back for a vacation or maybe someday, for good.
Other than handling occasional radio messages from The Philippines back in the 60's and 70's I knew next to nothing about it and hardly knew wehre in the world it was other than out in the pacific someplace farther out that Hawaii. Turn the calandar ahead a few decades and here is the entire world on the internet. I enjoy websurfing and maybe even a bit more than I should ( consumption of time, interest in many things etc. )and I am sure this has happened to millions of others.
One night a few years ago something came up on my screen that said " 9200 Iligan CIty, Philippines ". The name and post code intriegued me so I did a little websurfing to see what and what kind of place this was. I was becomming amazed as to just how much information you can find out about a place ( probably just about any place ) on the internet these days, I mean right down to small details.
I checked out some picture websites and began to see things that held my interest. was it tourist sites ? no, The Filipina Beauties ?, no ( but lots of nice looking ones out there for sure ) was it the natural beauty and geography ? no. I think primarily it was more of everyday things but scenes of things similar to when I was growing up that have disapeared in many areas of the USA. Things that were bypassed by the Interstate Highway system, went out of busines because of national chain discount stores. I guess the place just had what I would call a lot of individuality and character from what I saw in many pictures. Many other pictures showed local people having what appeared to be a great time and simple fun.
When I found that Iligan City is on an Island called Mindanao, naturally it was not long before I found Bob Martins website Mindanao.com, amoungst many others. Two years of websurfing, viewing thousands of pictures ( most of them taken and put on the internet by the people that live there ) and the same with videos and text, you can amass a lot of information about a place.
By the use of interactive websites and localized chats ( yes, there are a few " real people " in some of the chats ) I did make some acquaintences and chat friends.
Two years of all of this and I decided to actually go there. I learned as much as possible about preparations to go, verified and cross referenced many informational facts and details to avoid as many as possible mis-haps and disapointments that I could think of.
I consulted with Bob Martin several times on a few things and he was always quick to reply and helpful. His comments, advice and information proved to be right on target.
To me, the concept of being able to learn so much about a place half way around the world and much of it being shown by the people that actually live there ( as opposed to commercial travel books, websites and other more commercial promotions ) is quite a concept. I was able to see the things I really wanted to see ( just plain everyday kinds of things ) and places that I had never seen before like Internet Cafes, the insides of peoples homes in pics and home video. I was quite fascinated by a lot of what I was able to see.
One of the earlier pictures I saw was of Jollibee on Tibanga Highway in Iligan City. I stared at that picture for quite a while and thought " Imagine sitting in that place, eating hamburgers and watching Jeepneys, moterelas and other transportation go by that I had never experienced before ? The time finally came and I went there and yes, the first place I wanted to go was Jollibee on Tibanga Highway. It was just an incredible feeling just stiing in there doing what I had thought about for 2 years.
There is too much more to write about to put it all here. I was able to do some nice things for some of the people there before, during and after my initial visit. I had only planned on going once last year but 6 months later I found myself there again. I look forward to returning in the future.
One thing I can certainly say is that I never, ever recieved such a welcome from so many people as I did when I visited Iligan City. I have been to the UK many times but when it came to getting a " Royal Welcome " it happened to me in Iligan. ( see my video elsewhere on this website for more details ).
So, why do I read this website ? I found it by links on some of Bob Martins other websites, It has excellent interactivity, It answers many questions or verifies thoughts and impressions about things I saw, heard and experienced on my visits to both Cagayan De Oro and Iligan City , without me even having to ask.
The many articles written here by Americans living in The Philippines as well as those from other so called " western Countries " leave little room for translation error, the contributions by Filipinos on this site are interesting and many times provide insight on their culture and many other things in a way only they can describe. Additionally I was not as aware, as I am now that there were so many Americans and those from other parts of the world living in The Philippines.
Maybe another reason as well, possibly I have become a fan of Bob Martin along with his many website followers from all over the globe.
One of my favorite ways of describing my adventure to The Philippines is " Would you go half way around the world for a Hamburger ? ………………I Did " . It seems an interesting opener when I tell my friends here about the greatest vacation I ever had !
Haha! Guilty on all counts!
But I have a really good reason for my interest also. 🙂
Hello Dave,
First of all, Bob has a great "knack" for finding great writers for this site. This article really stands out, and is very important for people to think about, before making any decision about why they want to change there life so drastically. Whether that place be the Philippines or any other location in this world. You are dead on, when you say changing locales is not going to make anything change if you are not happy with your life, and you have certain problems. Changing your address won't take those problems away, they will still be there.
In 1997, I moved from Maryland to Florida. Why is this? For me it was just a change of environment, I disliked the gloomy winters in Maryland after 30 years of living there. Other than the weather, I was very happy in Maryland, had a great job I actually enjoyed doing, and family and friends that love me. I have never regretted moving to Florida.
Now, if you were to ask me a couple of years ago whether I would be thinking about moving to another country to live, I probably would have told you "are you crazy?" But since meeting Rose, two years ago, I can't wait to experience another culture and way of living, and get my family started in the Philippines. So this is why I read LiP web magazine, there is so much valuable information about making the move and a little heads up of what to expect when living in the Philippines.
So moving to the Philippines isn't me running away from any problems here in the USA, just want to get my family started there and for now, that is the best way for me to do that.
Again Dave, great article,
Salamat kaayo,
Danny 🙂
Hi Dave,
Your article is very thought provoking. I am a Fil-American that grew up in Mindanao and left the Phil some 20 years ago. I plan to move back there eventually. The LiP website provides insightful information from the perspective of people that are mostly from the western world. I guess living here in the US this long got me use to the way of life here. And reading the exchange of information in the LiP makes me more up-to-date with the situation there. The dynamic/real-time responses of LiP writers (especially Bob Martin) makes this site exemplary.
Your advice regarding taking it easy and sand analogy was a good 'life advice' from a seasoned person like you. Good job Dave.
Thanks for sharing your thoughts Dave. I think you captured the essence of the Philippines relocation decision perfectly. You're right about taking time to clearly understand one's motives before making the move. If someone's unhappy where they are now, they need to take the time to understand what it is they don't like.
If political corruption and the hassles of dealing with beaurocratic regulations are near the top of the list, they aren't going to find contentment in the Philippines. Chances are the Philippines will be noisier, more crowded, lower per capita income (more poor people) and at least equally if not more polluted than wherever they're contemplating moving from.
There will also be many smilling faces, warm weather, lower costs (for some items) and an opportunity to immerse oneself into a rich and vibrant culture. If you're a person with a generally contented disposition and are flexible enough to change, it could be the start of a facinating adventure. Just make sure that you've set your expectation based upon the wonderful advice shared by the knowledgeable authors on these forums.
Hello Dave,
In my case I am almost there to live. Not running from anything but yes in a way. I am almost your age, ( 60 ) and the first time I was there I just saw people like they used to be here when I was young. Oh I know things are going to be so different for me, but I remember when people were polite. Heck because of this site and all the wonderful people who respond and write, I know things are going to be so different. Politics etc. but still I am ready to adjust. I know eventually it will change but by then I should be gone. Heck and what a nice place for my kids and grandkids to vacation. Thank you for being one of the writers on this site. Oh and I have read how some even found this site and in my case I was looking for cars I Davao City. I think it John Grant just had a blog on it and have been hooked like most readers since.
Sounds good to me, James. (are you any kin to James Young Duncan,born Glasgow abt 1890, married to Katherine (Kate)? My maternal grandparents.
That's one of the reasons I write here, Michelje. It's one of the few Philippine oriented websites, blog or otherwise, that seems to have a mix of nationalities/cultures. I find I learn more here.
Jonaky, they say everything in life that happens, happens for areadon .. thank goodness that is usually true.
So true, Danny, so true. I'm sure I am a lot happier in the Philippines than I would have been if we had stayed in the US, it's just that my wife and I are lucky enough that we can be happy where ever we are … the Philippines is an add-on bonus, not the source of our happiness.
Thanks for the kind words, Gerry. You know it's funny, but the overwhelming negative opinions we've had about making the move to the Philippines have been from Filipnos and former Filipnos (former in the snese they have mived to the US now, for exmaple, and never, ever plan to go back)
The gist of the "don't do it" has been along the linbes of, "Oh there's corruption there" and "Oh there's many poor people there" and so on. All true enough, so far as facts go, but in a larger sense, "So what"? All Americnas have to do is look at the Wall Street mess or any number of 'pickles' the US is now in. Perhaps it takes the sting out of things to focus attention on what's gone wrong somewhere else … I think there's a verse about a mote and abeam that might apply, but I'll leave it at tyhat. And as far as poor people? Well I'm blessed to have more thna many do, so I do my best to spread the wealth around when it's appropriate to make some honest jobs available .. no one man or one country for that matter will cure poverty, but there's another quote about lighting a candle versus cursing the darkness that comes to mind.
It's a lot more fun to do something that pleases me and see how it turns out, thna to sit in the darkness and curse. Sadly, that's all that a lot of my fellow Americans are doing these days …
Thanks, David. Indeed, if you are gurdened by the ills of the world, and especially by politics in the US, you might actually blow a gasket hre in the Philippines.
Indeed there are many things here that remind me of being in a small town in the US 40 or 50 years ago. It's certainly not a negative feature to me;-)
My son, who's 30-somehting came to visit last year, he througholy enjoyed himself and will be back in January, God willing. A friend of one of my sisters-in-law came for a visit last year, a single, 40-ish American lady who had never been outside the US before. Exactly the sort of person you often hear wondering how any Amerian could go to such a third-world country, etc. Well guess what? She loved it. She loved my family, which became indistinguishable from her own, she loved walking through a neighborhood wjere people speak to their neighbors, and once she found out her driver's license was good here in the Philippines and that I would lend my car, it was off to the mall or some other new adventure every day of the week. Life is surely what you make it, at home or abroad.
I did something similar Dave, 3 of my friends there have their birthday the same month as mine. We all went to the nearby Red Ribbon Bake Shop ( a chain of retail bakeries owned by Jollibee Foods Corp ) LOL bought a birthday cake and devoured it !
Your Jollibee event however does inspier some thought however. Thanks for the suggestion !
I agree with everything you said. Did it strike a chord with me? Yes, I am just a jellyfish in the sea of life……
Not sure if that is just a joke, or if you really feel like a jellyfish. The point I am trying to make is, you need not stay 'waht you are', you need no one's permission to pick youurself up and 'be all you can be'. We still have that freedom.