Everybody makes mistakes in life, but when making a major life decision it is good to do it with as few mistakes as possible. Last week, I was listening to a Podcast on the Internet while out walking, and it was about the “10 Mistakes” that people make when doing this, that or the other. It got me thinking about what kind of mistakes people make when moving to the Philippines.
I thought back, also, on the mistakes that I have made – both when moving here, and after living here. Some of my mistakes cost me money, others cost me pride, and all of them caused me grief of one kind or another. So, in thinking, I decided to come up with a top ten list of mistakes that people make when they move to the Philippines. None of these mistakes is life threatening in any way, but still, if you can avoid making these common mistakes it might just lead to having a much happier life in the Philippines, and certainly fewer problems in life here.
Let’s see what I came up with, and why I feel they are mistakes.
Top Ten Mistakes People Make When Moving To The Philippines
Not being accepting of change. Change is inevitable in life. Even if you are staying in your comfortable home that you have known all of your life, change comes. Change happens. You can’t avoid it. Things change! Imagine, if you have decided to uproot your life and move half way around the world into a completely foreign culture and society? Talk about change! Pretty much everything in your life will change, to some extent, when you move to the Philippines. Even the things that you think will be “pretty much” the same, you will find out that they are much different than you thought at first glance. So, the difference between a successful move and a not-so-successful move comes from how you deal with change. Can you accept change, or will you fight it at every step of the way? If you are like most foreigners who move here, myself included, you will fight it. You will actually come to the feeling that the Philippines should change to accommodate your needs instead of you changing to fit in to society in your new home. If you are smart, before this feeling goes on too long, you will come to realize that the 100 Million + residents of the Philippines are not all going to change to make you feel good. You have a choice, you can either move back home where you are comfortable with life, or you can make changes in your life to fit in better into society here. None of us needs to completely change, but be adaptable on some things and you will be forgiven for those things that you just can’t change. If people see that you have made an effort to change yourself to fit in here, they will accept you, and even help you.-
Hanging Out Focusing all of your time on hanging out with other foreigners. This might be a bit of a touchy subject, but the truth is, if you move to the Philippines it is probably not the best plan to spend all of your time hanging out only with other Americans, other Brits, other Aussies, or whatever country it is that you came from. Try to have some Filipino friends, because they are the ones who can help you with #1, to change, and to understand what you need to change to have a happier life here. Nothing wrong to have friends from your home country, or other foreign countries, nothing wrong at all. But, you should also try to mix with some of your neighbors and other local people that you meet. You never know, you may find a few who will have a profound effect on your life. I know I did.
- Not Learning at least some of the local language. Learning at least some of the local language will change your life a lot, and change it for the better. Whether you become fluent in the language, as I did, or just learn enough to be able to say some common phrases, you will find that people will be very friendly and accept you much more if they see you are making an effort to learn the language. The Philippines has many different languages used in various places around the country, you should make an effort to learn some of at least the language that is widely spoken in the area where you decide to live.
Giving up too soon. Adjusting to living in the Philippines is not easy. It is a difficult transition to make. So many things are different. Dealing with government agencies can be quite taxing (in more ways than 1), lots of reasons why many expats become negative about life here. Many people give up and move back home where they came from. Too many people move back, and they tend to do so too quickly, in my opinion. The cycle seems to be that a person moves here, and quickly sees challenges in life here. Next, they let those challenges make their life negative and influence them to dislike life here. After that, they start hanging out with other people who hate living here, which only makes them feel worse about living here. After enduring this for a while, they just give up and leave. Alternatively, if you find it challenging when you move here, try to examine what you can do to make your life more enjoyable. How you can deal with the challenges in a positive way. If you can figure that out, and make the necessary changes, you might come to find that you love living here. That is how it worked in my life.- Buying a house too quickly. A lot of people will buy a house immediately after moving here. Some actually buy even before moving here! That, in my view, is a big mistake. I feel, quite strongly, that you should come here and rent a place to live for at least 2 to 5 years before deciding if buying a place is right for you. Doing it this way gives you a chance to decide a few things. Firstly, are you going to be happy living here. Secondly, are you going to be happy living in the city or area that you chose? You might want to move across town, or even to a different island. You are moving to a place that is new to you – take the time to check the place out before tying yourself down to a certain house. If you buy the wrong place, it might be impossible to sell it for the price you paid, or anywhere near that price. You might be stuck for years. Rent for a while – you might even decide that renting your residence is the right move permanently. I have no problem if you want to buy a house, but I just advise that you should live here for a while before making the final decision.
- Moving here without first visiting. I hear from a lot of people who tell me they are getting ready to move to the Philippines, and ask me a few questions. From the questions asked it becomes fairly apparent that they have never visited the Philippines, so I will ask them, just to be sure. “Oh no, Bob, I have never been there before.” Big mistake! Spend the money to take an exploratory trip here first, see how you like the place! Living here is very different from vacationing here, but at least you will get an idea of whether this is the type of place where you can live a comfortable life. When I say “comfortable life” I really am not talking about being financially comfortable, rather whether you can live here happily.
Not doing any research. This relates to #6. Many people move here without researching anything about living here. That is NOT a good idea. Inform yourself. Become an expert about living here. Being better informed is never a bad thing, and it may help you make wiser decisions if you do your research about your potential move! With the Internet at our fingertips these days, doing the research is not a difficult or expensive thing to do.- Listening to the wrong information. There is a LOT of wrong information out there on the Internet. I try to be accurate, but let’s be honest.. nobody is 100% accurate 100% of the time. So, your best thing that you can do in making decisions about moving here is to talk to multiple people and get a consensus opinion. If you talk to 10 people and 9 of them tell you that City A is a terrible place to live.. well, you probably can be fairly confident in what you are being told. Research multiple sources of information, and balance that all out to see what is logically the correct information.
Instead of finding solutions, just complain. As I said earlier, there are a lot of complainers, and a lot of people get sucked in to these groups of complainers. Most people, when they get into this type of group of people decide that there are no solutions to the problems, if there were solutions these folks would not all be complaining! Friends, I tell you, if you are diligent and resourceful there is no problem in life that you cannot solve, or at least improve. I went through my time of not liking life here. I complained. I acted out in stupid ways. I was unhappy. A time came, though, when I decided to have a happy life instead of being miserable. I looked for ways to improve my life, and guess what… I did. I am very happy with my life in the Philippines now, and have been for years. When you are ready to enjoy your life in the Philippines, stop complaining and put that energy into finding a way to make life better. You will be happy that you did. And.. you will then avoid #4.-
Not enough money Moving to the Philippines without the proper finances in place. This is, in my opinion, the number one worst mistake, and the most widely made mistake that I see. Too many people move here without having enough money. Too many people move here without having a source for ongoing finances to live life. Make a plan. Stick to your plan. Don’t get caught in the Philippines with an empty wallet. It is a big, big mistake. There is no safety net here. No government welfare. No Obamacare, Aquinocare or any other kind of health care, except the kind that you open your wallet for and pay for. There are not many jobs here that a foreigner can get. Either come here with ongoing income in place through a pension, Social Security, or a job that you can keep doing no matter where you live, or come up with a way to work for yourself here and make enough money so that you don’t have to struggle. This is the most important advice I can give you. If you come here without a good financial plan, and later on your get desperate, you may find it nearly impossible to fix your situation without leaving the Philippines and going back home. If you come here with a financial plan, but after a time you see that it is not working out the way you expected, try to fix your situation early enough that you can save yourself from free fall, and get back on your feet.
So, these are the things that in my view are very important mistakes that I see people make in moving here. Try to think about these things and do what you can to prepare for them, and to avoid these mistakes at all cost. You will be happy that you did, believe me. I will see how the comments go, and if there is a lot of interest in any of these thoughts, perhaps I will write future articles to expand on those mistakes that people seem to show the most interest in.
Wow! Bob, very well said! Excellent article and it’s absolutely true!!!!
Thanks for stopping by, Nilda! I am glad you found the article to be on the spot. I do feel that by making a few simple adjustments most people can drastically improve their lives in the Philippines. I know it worked for me!
Yes, great article Bob. This is sound wisdom everyone should heed.
I’ll be visiting Cebu in a couple of weeks… exploratory as you suggest.
Thanks.
Hi Zan – Thanks for your comment! Glad you found the article to be interesting and informative. Making an exploratory trip is an important first step toward moving here! Too many people move here sight-unseen. That is not a wise move, in my view. Enjoy your trip!
I’m considering going over to Bohol or Palawan…are those locations too far and or good choices…Thnaks.
Hi Zan – I would say that they are both nice places. The only thing I would consider is that they are both a bit remote, and not that many services. That statement applies more to Palawan than Bohol, but to some extent to both places. The availability of some products and services is limited in areas like that. My primary concern would be quality internet.
Thanks Bob…your advice and knowledge is much appreciated.
You are most welcome, Zan.
Hi Bob – Good article! Always like reading your posts.
Thanks, Brenton.
Excellent article Bob. I am a long time reader, but first time commenter. I’ve learned a lot from from you and the other writers of LIP and I would like to thank you and all the other contributors as well. I’ve visited the phils close to 20 times over the past 5 years and will likely decide to live there at least for part of the year in the near future. I, like you, especially like Mindanao and continue to visit there regularly. In my opinion, the attitude and approach you express here would also serve people welll in facing almost any challenge in life. Thanks again, keep up the good work.
Hi RJ – Well, my friend, it’s about time you decided to leave a comment! Years of reading, you should have commented a long time ago! Ha ha… just giving you a hard time. 🙂 Thanks for your kind words, RJ, I appreciate it very much. I hope that your plan works out and that you are able to make the move sooner than expected, and that it all goes smoothly! Where do you like to visit in Mindanao?
Hi Bob, t discovered your site about a year ago, so a procrastinator, yes, but not for 5 years. LOL. I’ve visited a number of places in the phils and as far as Mindanao goes, I’ve visited Davao City, and out to Samal Island to Pearl Farm, Gensan, Butuan City, Dipoolog City, Dapitan, Malaybalay, Ozamis City, and Cagayan de Oro. I’ve spent a lot of time in Manila, mostly in Makati, and in Cebu city. I’ve had short one week visits to Boracay and Bohol. as well. I just returned last week from the phils and I will return in August. I’ll plan on spending a few days in Davao City so maybe we can get together for some coffee or lunch. My treat. Thanks again for all your help.
Hi RJ – Wow, you are a really prolific traveler! You have just about covered Mindanao! It is a beautiful island, no doubt.
Lunch? Hey, that sounds great! Give me a shout when you are in Davao next.
Prolific traveler, LOL….well I would just say that I am interested in visiting and learning about different places…..Sorry Bob, I didn’t answer your initial question…of course I like Davao City, but I enjoy all of the other places also…so I’m not sure where I would decide to be most of the time. Davao City is a clean and safe place and I feel very comfortable there… I’d like to spend more time there and continue to learn what it has to offer. I know you have writers that live north of Manila…I’ve never been to the Subic bay area or north of Manila for that matter so I will try to visit there at some point…. Yea sure lunch is good….I will finalize my travel plans soon…as of now ..i just know I will arrive in Manila on August 8 and return to U.S on Sept. 3. I have nothing filled in between yet, but I will let you know.
I think you are doing the right thing, RJ, by visiting many places and seeing which place is right for you. That is the only way to really know for sure! Keep it up, and you will find just the right spot!
Bob, I agree …many people ask all kinds of questions about a place and the people that know try to respond and be helpful, but at some point ..you just need to go there and see for yourself. Thanks to you at least people have information to consider in making such an important decision.
For sure, RJ!
Bob,
Great job with this article! Very helpful and couldn’t agree with you more 🙂
Take care,
Anah
Thanks, Anah!
Bob,
Your spot on with your top ten mistakes. I hear about expats making these mistakes all the time. Hopefully alot of people looking to move here will read this article and avoid the pitfalls.
Thanks, PapaDuck. Yep, I pretty much wrote this article based on my own mistakes that I made over the years here. I have not made them all, but have made plenty. I have observed all of them, some with disastrous results!
#9 is near and dear to my heart Bob. Us Americans are so used to seeing something and trying to improve on it, and it drove me crazy as to why they don’t do things “MY WAY”. Watching them build our house nearly gave me a stroke lololol. Now I just observe, smile, chuckle at times, and think things over. I do have a Filipino friend that I will ask “why do they do that?” Usually the answer makes me go AHHHHHHHH. But every so often I see a light come into his eyes and he says “that’s a good idea”
Now my motto is. “slow down and smell the bulaklaks”
Hi Scott h – I hear you! I have been there and done that myself. I kind of got turned around in this attitude due to a carpenter that we have used for many years. His name is Jun Jun. Jun Jun does excellent work, and he always pleases me with the results. But, when we first started using him, I would keep a close eye on him, instruct him exactly what I wanted, and I would correct him when I saw him taking what I considered a “wrong turn”. One time, I decided to just let him do it his way, so I told him what result I wanted, and I backed off. I saw that he didn’t do it using the method that I would have, but the results were exactly what I wanted. Since then, I just tell him what I want and let him do the work… never had a problem!
Good article Bob,
Couldn’t imagine moving there without visiting first. We’re on a four year plan trying to get prepared for the move . With every successive visit as we visit another area or meet more family members or whatever, another piece of the overall puzzle falls into place. I think three words might appropriate, planning, planning, and planning.
Thanks,
SteveC
Hi SteveC – You would be surprised at how many people I hear from who have everything prepared to move here, and they have never even visited. It is very obvious by the way they talk. Lots of people will tell me they are moving here and wondering if they should learn Spanish or not. I ask them… “Spanish? Why would you learn Spanish?” They reply “So I can talk to the people there.” When I tell them that they don’t speak Spanish here, sometimes they tell me that I don’t know what I am talking about! 🙂
Hi Bob,
I was thinking of moving to Russia because I’m fluent in Japanese. Some say I’m indecisive, but I don’t know. haha Seriously, great post! I’m coming in August this year. I’ve read a ton of information, but I’ve just come to the realization that reading it and living it are two different things.
I’m just going to strap on the jet pack and enjoy the ride!
I have learned a great deal via your websites and books.
Thank you!
Bill
Hi Bill – My favorite singer, Jimmy Buffett, has a line in one of his songs where he says “Indecision may or may not be my problem!” I’ll stick with that. 😉
Yeah, most stuff that causes us problems in life are things that we cannot change anyway, so just sit back and enjoy the ride. Just do your best to prepare then adjust the best you can to the reality of life here. If you can’t do that, the Philippines is probably not the place for you.
I know you can do it, though, Bill.
Nice quote! 🙂 Thanks Bob! I know I can do it too. I’m looking forward to it.
Blessings Always!
Thanks, Bill!
Not sure about Number 10. I do not mean the premise but I have never moved or went somewhere for any period of time where I had enough money. That’s whether it’s 6 figures or 3 still can’t see, eat, drink (not always alcohol) or meet enough people, heck can’t even buy them all a Coke if they sing. I think when we come I will put away enough to return to US and a couple of thousand for in case.. The rest I’ll probability party with and any left over just waste. LOL
.
Hi Garald.. hmmm.. I am talking about coming here with enough money to be safe. To be able to provide for your family. To pay for the costs if your wife or child gets sick. That kind of thing. If it is a permanent move, I think that is very important.
Well said Bob! I would like to add to your comment re buying a house. My advice is ‘never’ buy a house here as ‘you’ cannot own it. If you buy a house keep in mind one day you might lose it.. Only invest as much as you are prepared to lose.However you can lease land for 50 years in your name, then build your house, it’s yours for fifty years. Of course a foreigner can buy a condo but be careful as you don’t know who your neighbours will be and they sure don’t make the walls soundproof..
Hi Jack – Thanks for stopping by, and for leaving your comment. I am in full agreement with you on the house thing… I really don’t have much interest in buying a place. Rent is cheap, and it doesn’t bother me at all to rent. Many people, though, feel strongly the other way, and I consider it a personal decision. I am fine with that!
Bob that’s funny about learning Spanish!
I know you have mentioned numerous times the importance of learning the local language and I know for me that it’s essential to do so. I can’t tell you how many times I want to just have a casual conversation with someone, whether at the Palengke, at one of the many SM stores or just in the province with one of my G.F.s many cousins or Lola’s/Lolo’s and I can’t because of my language barrier. It’s not easy learning a new language but I don’t see how anyone could move to a different country and not try to learn the language.
SteveC
I agree with you SteveC. Learning the language, or at least learning some words and such is a very important step toward being accepted in the locale. It shows that you are interested in joining the community, etc.
Otro buen artículo, mi amigo. (another good article, my friend.) Thanks for writing another good one. You might want to add, “Don’t Spit At the Wind, Adjust Your Sails!” 🙂
Hello Jose, always nice to hear from you. When will we see you in Davao?
Bob, will try to make it there next month (July.) Will call you from Gran Men Seng so we can have coffee.
Sounds great, my friend!
On a sailing vessel it is an insult to the previous watch to change the set of the sail within the first 15 minutes of assuming the quarterdeck.
Also, you never piss to the windward side, always go to the leeward side. The same rule applies to spitting.
It’s hard to believe that someone could plan on making a PERMANENT move without making a visit first, isn’t it? Certainly, I moved to South Africa with my South African girlfriend in 1994, on the basis that if I liked it we would stay, and if not, we’d move on, but we were young and it was all part of life’s adventure. There was still a life and home to return to, but even then, I wouldn’t have been burning any bridges.
All of your points are very valid, and especially the one about being willing to have a mixed social group.
Yes, Jim, hard to believe, but true. I get at least a half dozen inquiries per week from people all ready to move here, but have never been here before. Amazing.
One item I have not seen mentioned for a while, correct me if I am wrong, but if a foreigner gets into any kind of serious confrontation with the law, they could be subject to being deported and never being allowed to return. Just suppose, someone came there, bought or leased property, built a house, filled it with furniture, appliances etc. then got into some kind of tempered argument which turned violent ( don’t get me wrong as I am not a violent person myself but I could easily see something like this happening ) , you end up being deported and you loose all.
To me, moving to a foreign country or even to another place in your own country can be a gamble. The more you learn before you go, the better your odds will be in having the winning situation you imagine and hope for.
Hi Bob – Absolutely. You are correct that I have not mentioned that in a while. If you do get into trouble and get deported… poof, it’s all gone! If you just want to leave and don’t get deported, having a house or other substantial assets can have you stuck here, in that it could be difficult to sell!
Yep Sir Bob another quality article. This should be in the Moses Ten commandments class. Reading this article will save people a lot of problems later.
There is no doubt about it, living here is certainly challenging and when you think you got it mastered, some thing pops up to test your patience.
Hi Boss – Haven’t heard from you in a while! I hope you are doing well.
Oh I forgot, one of my biggest complaints ( oops ), add food to the list at number 11.
Bring enough sandwiches with you to last three months until you get used to the food.
If you like Spam back in the US then the local food will suit you down to the ground.
Having said that the quality of food in the Pines has improved greatly over the last 7 years.
Welcome to the Philippines.
If you bring enough sandwiches to last 3 months, you are just delaying the “get used to it” process by 3 months! 😉 ha ha… point taken, Boss.
Another great and helpful article. Besides all the solid advice, one of the things I appreciate most is your willingness to share your own person struggles.. You offer encouragement based on not just experience challenges but also that you got thru and actually are enjoying life on this side of the challenges.. Good advice for living in the Philippines but great advice for navigating thru life I like Jose’s comments about not spitting into the wind.. Thanks for the helpful advice and for the authenticity.
Thank you, Roy. I appreciate what you said. You are right, Jose had some good advice there too! 😉
Excellent advise Bob! I’m already doing some of the things you mentioned, research, research, research! learning tagalog, getting pretty good at it thanks to my many friends over there, finances are no problem and I surely will rent a house in which case I can move from place to place until I find the “Right” spot to settle permanently if I so choose.
Again, great advise Bob, you and your family have a great day!
Hello Heinz – Thanks so much, I appreciate your input. Oh, and by the way, my friend… happy birthday!
Hi Bob,
I really enjoyed your article! On #2 I think I am kind of the other way around. I have not moved to the Philippines, but when I visit I spend almost 100% of my time with Filipinos. My favorite thing about the Philippines is the people and the culture. I might feel different if/when I actually move there IDK. I have always liked learning about different cultures. That is part of the reason I am on your site because I feel the expat community is a kind of culture that I have not really learned about.
We will visit soon and I intend on spending some time with an expat this time. My wife’s friend from high school married a man from California. They lived in California for a few years then decided to move to Bohol a year and a half ago. They just had there 3rd child last week.
Hi Jay, like you, I enjoy spending time with Filipinos. I have a number of very close Filipino friends.
Hey, enjoy your upcoming trip!
Bob
Another informative article. I am one of the one’s who is going to be moving there without ever having visited…lol. While I tend to also think this might be not so good an idea, I have ventured into unknown ground before..more times than not successfully but some ventures ..not so much…lol
I am however doing a ton of research..for better than 2 years now. I have made several pinoy friends and speak daily with at least a couple of them over the internet. they are helping a great amount with my tagalog pronunciation as reading it cannot give you the inflections.
At any rate. A good amount of your article speaks to adaptation and change. I was wondering if you could maybe expand on that abit. I do not mean obvious things like weather or food. But the things that anyone who had never been there would not see coming. Even the small inconsequential things that you might see as no big deal could maybe throw someone else for a loop. ie: maybe things that we here in the states do not find offense but are an insult there?..things of that nature…Maybe a good topic for your pod-cast..which is an awesome idea by the way.
salamat po ~~Richard
Hi Richard – Over the years, I have written hundreds of articles about adjustment to different lifestyle here. I would recommend that you go back and read old articles on this site, as many of those articles contain golden information for somebody that is moving here. There are nearly 4,000 articles on the site, so plenty to keep you busy. To be honest, to simply write out a few examples is nearly an impossible task. Basically, every part of your life will change. Even the things that seem that they will be similar or the same as you have now… you will learn that they are a huge change! I wish you the best of luck. It is not an easy adjustment, though. Most people who move here are unable to make it. If you can stick it out, though, for 4 or 5 years, you will end up loving it here.
Good points Bob.
Thanks, Chas.
Hi Bob – Excellent article but few heed the advice and end up with problems longer term. I have found from experience here a lot of expats do not trust their other halves so when illness or death comes hardship prevails and it’s so sad to see.
Regards.
Jim.
Thanks Jim. You know, I have observed the same, that many westerners here don’t have much trust in their spouse. I have never really understood that.
If your a dual citizen, do you have to get a visa 13g to permanently stay in the Philippines?
A citizen does not need, and cannot even get a visa.