Life is funny, and people are too. You know the old saying – “The grass is always greener on the other side.” Well, I really believe that it is a saying that is true in many senses. As I have mentioned several times on this site, when I made the decision that I wanted to live in the Philippines, a lot of my family and friends said I was crazy. The reaction was basically – “what’s he been smoking now?” About the only two people who thought that it was a sane move to make were Feyma and Myself, and I’m not even sure how committed she was to it! 😉
Now that we have been here for over 7 years, it seems that opinions are changing. The same people who thought (and even told me) that I was a lunatic for even considering such a move are now showing a little envy! Over the past few days, I have gotten e-mails from 3 different people who have showed a little envy over the move and how it has turned out. Just this morning I got an e-mail from the Insurance Agent that I used to deal with when I lived in the States. Although he never told me that I was crazy, I feel sure that he thought I was. But, in his e-mail, we was saying things like “I can see through your website that you are so happy, and having a great life.” Others have e-mailed me and told me how they wish that they could have a nice life in a tropical country and such. I must admit, it makes me feel a little redemption to know that people who had written me off as a lunatic are now rethinking what they said and felt. Funny thing is that these people that have been in touch lately are people that I am amazed would even contact me. It’s not like they were close friends, just people that I had a passing relationship with. I mean, how often do you hear from your Insurance Agent from 10 years ago? I’m shocked that he even looked for my site on the net!
As you know, recently my Mom was visiting here in Davao. She has really made a progression in her thinking about the move too. Both she and I have written about that in recent months. When we moved here, she swore that she would never come to the Philippines, no matter what. Now, she tells me how much she loves it here! And, she is not even into things like beaches and such. She just likes the friendly people, the good food, fruits and other things that are in abundance here in the Philippines. I told her during her visit that I was absolutely amazed at how much her feelings have changed. And, now I’m hearing the same types of things from other people who used to be part of my life.
It makes me wonder – will my move make other Americans that I knew before consider making such a move when they retire, or when they wish to make a change in their lives? I mean, maybe some people who would have never considered retiring in Mexico, or even in the Philippines. I keep reading in US newspapers and magazines that retiring abroad, even living abroad is a lifestyle that is becoming more and more accepted and popular among Americans, and people from other countries too! Maybe some of these people who have contacted me did so because they read an article about overseas retirement, or medical tourism or something, and I came to mind, so they searched for me on Google? Who knows what brought me to mind, but it does make me wonder if they are contemplating such a move.
If you are considering such a move in the future, how does your extended family and your friends feel about the possibility? Are they happy for you? Do they think it will be good for you? Or, do they think you are a fool, as most thought about me when I made the move?
I heard the same hullaballo when I came over here from my friends and now that I am over here only 1 member of my family and 1 of my former friends writes/calls me regularly. The rest seem to have pronounced my death and moved on. oh well, the more fool them. It's my life to live not theirs.
Hi all
To be honest, I did not tell them (only to very close friends) of my plans because I know they will argue with this and that.
The funny thing is IMO that most of those have never visited or lived in an other country though they think they can give you advice.
I can only pray that I have the opportunity to live in the philippines one day.Well, I am still young (26 y/o) and I have time to prepare.
But to be honest, I feel like I am an oversea worker and I dont feel home in my own country (switzerland) anymore.I feel lonely even when I am with friends and I feel like I just work here until I can visit the philippines again. (and of course, to meet my girlfriend again)
Its always hard when others tell you that its not a good idea to make such a move and you try anyway, then you fail and come back and all the people say "Its like I was telling you!" but when you succeed, they will be quiet 🙂 So you just go ahead and try to live your life, at the end, its YOU that have to live your life and not the ones commenting your plans.
Ayo-ayo
Smithy
Bob,
My mom has known Elena for a few years now and has spoken to her on the phone, seen her on my webcam and written to each other. My mom loves Elena and wished she would have been here to know her better.
When I told my mom that because of my loss of work, and the possibility of finding a decent job in the US was thin, and I am planning to move to Davao, at first my mom thought I was crazy.
Now my mom just asks if I have a date planned for the move. She is also sad not to have been able to be with Elena. I told my mom, "Well, you just fly to Davao to visit us."
I am not sure if my mom will, but at least she is supportive of my move, and knows Elena and I will be happy together.
Bob,
After I posted my last comment, I realized there is more….
When I tell people I know about my situation. How I either can stay in the US, probably have to move, get a job with less pay so I will have to live in a lower standard and probably have to work a second job, or I can move to Davao, use my retirement savings and proceeds from the sale of my home to live a comfortable, but simple life there. Most people comment with things like, "What a shame the economy in the US is getting so bad, that people have to leave" or "Good for you that you have your fiancee, what will people do, that do not have connections elsewhere, to do"
I guess with the economy now this way, people are more understanding than when you moved there.
Hi Bob,
IMO, I figure out that one reason why one decides to settle down in the Philippines because “The person you love is from the Philippines”. With this sole reason anyone can be highly motivated to move over there specially if this person is giving you unconditional love in return and if your financial capability can endure. The prices of goods, the hospitality of the people, the weather, the beaches, and anything positive about the country are just significant plus points. Because the love of your life is from there, you are ready to deal with any negative aspects of the country and its populace.
Just my single cent. 😉
Hello Bob,
I don't get much push back from people who know me because I have lived overseas a lot over the last 30 years. Between the Air Force and my job with Boeing I've lived 8 years in Germany, a year in Korea and a year in the Philippines. Most family and friends kind of expect me to be going somewhere sooner or later.
Even my pinay wife of 11 years is about ready to move back to the Philippines. She no longer says "why?" when I talk about moving to the PI she says "What about the cats?"; I guess now it's more about the details of how and when vs. the if or why we move.
I hope when we move to the Philippines we have a good network of friends like the ones on this group; it will make all the difference.
Hi Bob,about 300,000 brits left the UK last year looking for a better life away from the high tax's and the rat race,and about one million moved in 🙄 all I can say is good luck to them.It will be my turn soon to move to phills and I cant wait 😆 😆
Hi Bob, Marlou's family which is of course Filipino thinks we are crazy to consider moving back there. They feel that reaching America is the goal and to make money, etc……We all know where that line of thought goes. However-once I get talking to them they usually say that they own some land or plan on retiring back in the Philippines. Marlou will do what I want but I can tell that her desire for now at least is to remain in the U.S…Once she has her citizenship I think she will be more open to returning. My own family understands that I have always traveled and lived in to them strange places-whatever I do will not surpise them in the least. In fact the expect the un-expected from me. If for some reason I became normal they would think I was in need of help. For me its really simple. I just want good friends, to not be stressed, to value my family time, to enjoy good food, listen to wonderful music, write and read when the desire is there. When I analyze where I can do that best its the Philippines. Ron
Hi Louis – It will be interesting to see if your friends' and family's reactions changes as time passes. So far your experiences mirrors mine, but I can see people starting to make changes in their thoughts now that I've come here for a longer time and been successful in it.
Hi Florian – Nice to see that you were able to get the site working for you again! 🙂 You are right, it is so funny when the people who give the strongest advice are the ones who have never even been abroad!
Hi Bruce – Seems people are understanding with you, that's good.
Hi Teng – What you say is true, but I am also talking about people where both the husband and the wife are foreigners and move here! For example, I have a friend who is Japanese, and his wife is also Japanese, yet they chose to live in Davao! Now, that is more interesting too, don't you think?
Hi Mark – Ha ha… what about the cats? Did you know that you can even bring them to the Philippines with you, without too much hassle too. You are correct, building up a good network of friends is important, and always will help you no matter where you live.
Hi John J – Interesting – 300,000 leaving and a Million moving in! It's like that in the Philippines too…. you know a lot of Filipinos trying to get out through work, marriage or whatever means. But, a (smaller) number of foreigners moving in! People are always looking for something different than they are used to, I guess.
Hi Ron LaFleur – I can understand Marlou's feelings about wanting to get citizenship before returning to the RP. I think it's actually a good move.
Hi Bob,
Its very inspiring reading your Blogs. For most of my life I have felt trapped in this rat race. I work for a major bank here in the US in the IT department. I have always had this urge to run off to some exotic far away places. Then some of my friends here in New York that are Philippino 's invited me to the Philippines about 5 years ago and I have to say it was the most intriguing experience of my life….I have been to quiet a number for other countries, but there is something about the Philippines that really captured me, within those 5 years I have visited the Philippines 4 times. I love the Country, the food and most of all the People. I am now married to a Beautiful Philippina. We have one child and she is now expecting our second.
We are making plans to move there within the next 2 years hopefully sooner,we have a vacation home in the Caribbean that we are planning to rent and use the money to sustain us in the Philippines also, maybe pursue other business ventures there.
Let me salute you for your courage for making the move and being an inspiration to those of us who are still thinking of it…..
Regards.
Tony…..
Hi Tony – Thanks for your kind words. Congratulations to you on your coming child as well! It sounds like you are well on your way to making a nice life for you and your family! I'm sure you will never regret it!