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How much would you pay for a Filipina?

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How much would you pay for a Filipina? What?  Is Bob smoking crack now?

No, I am not on drugs, and to be honest, the title is more to grab attention than anything else.  But, today, I want to make you aware of, and talk about a new law that is being debated in Indonesia.  So, the title would be more fitting if it read “How much would you pay for an Indonesian?”  However, later in the article, we’ll talk more about how this might be related to the Philippines too.

You see, recently, Indonesian legislators have been considering a new law that would require foreign men to pay a “deposit” of around $55,000 to the Indonesian Government if they choose to marry an Indonesian woman!  It’s true.  If you don’t believe it, check out the article “Can’t buy love?  Indonesia thinks foreign men should.”  Under this new law, if enacted, any foreign man who enters into marriage to an Indonesian woman, in Indonesia will be required to put $55,000 into deposit with the Indonesian Government.  The reason for this deposit, according to the Indonesian supporters of the law, is that should the marriage end in divorce, or if the wife is abused, it will cost money for the government, and in that case the $55,000 deposit would be used to cover the costs.

A lot of foreign men, and also a lot of Indonesian brides-to-be are up in arms over the proposed legislation.  Many are saying that this amounts to the country selling it’s women to foreigners, all for the benefit of the Government.

Frankly, it seems that many Governments around the world are instituting (or at least considering it) new laws or regulations that make it more difficult for people to marry outside their country.  For example, I recently read that the British Government is planning to implement a new policy that will make it much more difficult for a foreign bride to join her husband in the UK.  The lady (or man, I suppose) will be required to pass a language test.  Well, in the case of the Philippines, most Filipinos can speak English, but do they speak English well enough to pass the British Government examination?  It remains to be seen.  Frankly, English is different from Country to Country.  The English that an American like me speaks has differences from the English that a Brit speaks.  And, the Philippine English is different than either American or British English.  So, can a Filipino pass the exam?  How can we know?  Certainly, an Indonesian bride would have a more difficult time, without a doubt.  And, by the way, how many British people coming to the Philippines can speak Tagalog, Bisaya or one of the other Philippine languages?  Very few.

So, how does the Indonesian law apply to the Philippines?  Well, directly it does not apply.  However, if the Indonesians successfully implement the law, and these $55,000 deposits start flowing in to the Indonesian treasury, how long would it take for the Philippines to follow suit?  Let’s face it, there are a lot more foreigners coming and marrying in the Philippines than in Indonesia.  if you figure around P2 Million per marriage to a foreigner, that money would supplement the Philippine budget nicely.  Yes, the money is just a “deposit,” but if the marriage does not last for a minimum of ten years, then the deposit is forfeited.  A lot of marriages do not last ten years.  A lot of those deposits would never be claimed.

Frankly, over the years, the Philippine Government has shown many times over that the best interest of it’s citizens takes second seat behind what fills the treasury.  Filipinos are sent to work overseas, and there is a requirement to send money back to the Philippines (yes, it is required).  What is good for the Filipino is not first and foremost, what is good for the country is.  So, if the Philippines sees Indonesia start raking in a few bucks from the “marriage business” how long would it take before the Philippine Government starts studying the feasibility of doing the same thing here.

Frankly for me, it’s shameful.  Why do governments think that they should have a say in who we marry?  What will be next when it comes to governments stepping in and trying to control our private lives?  Frankly, I think this just goes too far.

UPDATE: The comments on this have taken a different direction than I had considered.  What I was looking for more was “what if” this happened in the Philippines.  Let’s say the Philippines said you have to pay a deposit of P2M if you marry a Catholic Girl (since the comments seem to be focusing on the fact that this law focuses on Muslims).  How would you feel?  Do you think it would be possible?  Of course, you are free to discuss any aspect of the legislation in the comments, but I was just hoping we could focus on the Philippines a bit more.

Reader Interactions

Comments

  1. Hi Bob;
    If something as dumb as that, were to ever happen, I hope we come under a Grandfather Clause. But I think you hit the nail square on the head, a countries treasury, will always trump its citizens.

    • Hi Paul – Good morning, my friend! I think that since we are already married, there is nothing that could be done now… thank god for that! The treasury always comes first, no doubt!

      • Hi Again;
        On the matter of OFW’s in your post, as you know my daughter Ymir Thea, works in Singapore, she supports no one here in the Philippines. Who does the government require she send a remittance to? She does once in a while send money through her mother to be deposited into her Bank Account. Would that cover her with the rule?

        • Hi Paul – I have been told by people who should know that OFW’s have a requirement to remit to the Philippines. I don’t know in your daughter’s situation.. is she officially an OFW, got her job through the POEA? It would be interesting to know more.

          • Bob;
            No POEA, she found the job online and I paid her way over, and then her boss in Singapore set up her work visa. Never was the Philippine Government or any cheating agents involved. So I assume she’s exempt.

              • The Original question…How much would I pay? If I had to, for the one I have. All I’ve got!

              • I’m with you on that, Paul! I wonder, though, if it came “up front” before you kicked the tires… how many would pay it? Few, I suspect.

              • Pay all you’ve got – but to the gov’t? Maybe you could just live together with annual visa runs 8-D

  2. Bob asks : However, if the Indonesians successfully implement the law, and these $55,000 deposits start flowing in to the Indonesian treasury, how long would it take for the Philippines to follow suit?
    I think the obvious answer is “forever” . Why? Firstly because Indonesia is the world’s most populous Muslim-majority country , whereas the Philippines is mostly Christian. And what the post does not say is that even the proposed Indonesian legislation only applies to foreign men wishing to wed Muslim women — it will not apply to Christians or Buddhists or Hindus .

    As to the claim that “it seems that many Governments around the world are instituting (or at least considering it) new laws or regulations that make it more difficult for people to marry outside their country.”- that is just not the case. The governments have no interest in who people marry outside the country- it is strictly an immigration matter- not a marriage matter.
    I do appreciate that you are intentionally trying to be sensationalist today to get the week off to a good start Bob lol

    • Hi ian – in many cases, the governments are using immigration policy to make it more difficult to marry abroad. I have no doubt about it.

      • Bob:

        Ian is right on this one… The Indonesian law applies to Muslims because of the ease of divorce under sharia. It is being proposed because of the number of women who are wife number 2,3,or4 being dumped without having any resources.

        Under Indonesian law, it is illegal for non-muslims to marry a muslim without converting to Islam. The laws there regarding marriage have always been very complex: There are issues of nationality and race in addition to laws about religion.

        • Hi John – Sorry to disagree, but in my research on this law, it applies to all Indonesians, not just Muslims. Yes, the vast majority of Indonesians are Muslim, but not all.

          • Bob:

            The article states that the law will not apply to christians, buddhists, or hindus. Indonesia is only predominantly muslim in certain areas. Some areas, like Bali, are predominantly other religions. From what I know about the subject, the laws in Indonesia are different, depending on which religion you belong to. It is much the same situation in Malaysia. The reason is the long history of racial asnd religious tension in both countries. If you are muslim, you are subjected to different laws than if you are christian or other. Marriage is definitely one of those different areas. I have several Chinese colleagues in Indonesia who have come up against these marriage rules in the past… it is not simple.

            Interesting that in the article they interviewed a woman with a German boyfriend (Who may be muslim).

        • Bob- I didnt actual research the law- I just quoted from the link that you posted ! lol
          The link says, and I quote ” The proposal requires foreign men wishing to wed Muslim women — it will not apply to Christians or Buddhists or Hindus — to put a guarantee of 500 million rupiah (55,000 dollars) into a bank.”
          Thats a direct quote from the article by By Arlina Arshad (AFP) – May 31, 2010

          One thing I find interested in John Miele’s post- he says that Indonesian law makes it illegal for non-muslims to marry a muslim w/o converting to Islam. I assume that that law is not enforced, because i cant imagine that all the foreigners that go there and marry Indonesian muslim women convert to Islam .

          • Ian: There are many non-muslim women in Indonesia… The country is only around 70% muslim. There are huge areas of non-muslims (Chinese, hindu, christian). Some islands are wholly a different religion.

            • According to Wikipedia, 86%, not 70% of the population is moslem. and yes, the law is enforced: NO cross religious marriages allowed. Typically the foreign man “converts” is Islam. how about that for starting a marriage with a lie. I mentioned this law one time of a moslem indonesian woman. she said, “No problem, the foreigner converts to Islam”. As a joke, I replied, “Or the Indonesian moslem woman converts to Christianity.” The woman replied (as if correcting me if I had said that the sun rises in the West), “Oh no, Don, that is impossible.”

          • Hi ian – I read many articles about the legislation, and most did not mention religion at all. Maybe I should have linked to a different article! 😆

  3. Hey Bob,
    So I guess the loophole is that you marry your bride in a foriegn country…lol.

    I find it amazing that the Filippino government relies on OFW’s to increase its GDP.

    • Hi Hudson – It is true, under the Indonesian proposed law, if you marry abroad there is no deposit to pay.

      The OFW situation doesn’t surprise me at all. It’s a big earner for the Philippine Government, actually it is the number 1 biggest component of GDP, so they will exploit it as much as possible!

      • This is a definitonal issue: Income earned abroad (by cmompanies based in your country or by your nationals working abroad) is included in the calculation of GDP. It is not included in GNP, one of the reasons that GDP and GNP differ. suddenly had a bad thought, maybe I (an econo ist) have GDP and GNP mixed up. In any event, in our area, if there is a bid new house, the family is either Chinese, has someone working abroad or the daughter is married to a foreigner.

    • Hey Hudson- I dont find the Phil govt’s reliance on OFW cash inputs amazing at all, since the country seems to have little else to export- other than cheap labour ! I dont see huge amounts of minerals or wheat or beef or timber or rice or cars or motorcycles or manufactured goods going overseas. At least the Japanese buy all the Cavendish bananas as part of the current diet fad. lol And tourist industry ? How much effort goes into promoting Davao City as a tourist spot ? [ unless of course you count the country in general’s unpromoted but non-the less very real sex tourism trade. ]

      • Mining is big in the Philippines, mostly in Mindanao, up around Diwalwal – gold, silver, etc. It is mostly exported to Australia. Electronics is also a big export market – Intel, Fujitsu and such have fabs here, up in Luzon.

        • Fujitsu Philippines, Inc.
          Company Facts
          Date Established: 1975
          Line of Business:
          – Design builds and implements ICT solutions
          – Software development
          – Remote technical support
          – Network design and onsite field services
          Number of Employees: Over 500
          exports??

          • Do you think they are developing software for Philippine companies, ian? ICT solutions… that is also an export market. Remote technical support, they are exporting that via the telephone lines. Almost all of Fujitsu’s work is exported. Your point?

      • I’d just like to point out that it’s not necessarily “cheap labour” the Philippines exports. I guess if you look at the salaries paid to OFW’s in the middle east, it might be regarded as cheap labour, but that’s just the going rate for the jobs in question. In Western economies, the pay rate is normally the same regardless of the nationality of the worker.

        (Now I guess we could get into a discussion here about unscrupulous employers trying to hire overseas workers at slave rates, but that’s a different conversation altogether).

  5. Hi Bob
    In the article it said that if there was a divorce within 10 years the wife can get the deposit. If you are married for 10 years or more you can get a refund under shared property. It also stated that it will only affect foreigners marrying Muslim ladies. Of course it may be very difficult or even impossible to get your refund back or if you did I’m sure the government would keep all interest accrued on the 55k marriage deposit. When you look at some of the costs of bringing your wife to the U.S. with all the application fees (adjustment of status and grreen card) and that you are liable for her medical costs potentially for her entire life even if you get a divorce (if she does not get remarried or becomes a U.S. citizen) maybe there is not a whole lot of difference.

    • Hi Neil – If you marry an Indonesian lady and bring her to your country, you are still on the hook for her medical care, her immigration expenses and such, and still have to pay the 55k too. I did say in the article that the money is refundable if you stay married for 10 years.

  6. I have nothing to add to the discussion, but can’t resist making my first post to Live in the Philippines while I am actually in the Philippines. Arrived in Cebu on Friday evening, today (Monday 21 June) is our 19th wedding anniversary. My first San Miguel in 4 years tasted real good. Okay, sorry for the interruption. Carry on, gentlemen.

  7. Well..this will separate the have’s from the have nots!, and if the Phillipines came up with a law like this there…that would pretty much be a sad day for many Fillipina’s who are wanting a Husband and blow away the idea that a lot of expats could come to the land of enchantment and retire and live pretty nice on a couple of thousand $ a month.

    • Hi Dan – without a doubt, what you say is true. However, it is also true that most Filipinos think that we foreigners have so much money that $50k or so is nothing to us.

      • Well Bob..Hopefully they will not come up with a law like that..but if they did..then maybe it would take a while..but I belive the Filipinos concept that we are all rich and 50k or 100k or so is nothing to us..would change when they looked around and not 2 many kano’s to look at and smile and say “hey Joe” toooo..They be saying to their Filipino friends…You seen Joe lately! Friend say back…who? I really belive Goverments need to let people figure their own stuff out..because no matter what country You live in when the day comes You have to pay the Goverment or put up a big deposit before you can marry a woman or have one…then that will be a sad day indeed for all..

  8. Hey Bob, The only thing I can say is that I got a real bargan when I married my wife!! It only cost me my love for her, see if they can collect from that. J.C

  9. Hi Bob- 2 million you say I wish thats all it had cost me over the years lol.
    I hope Marilou doesn’t read this .
    Regards.
    Jim.

  10. Bob, et al:

    What happened to free love? I suppose Indonesia is going back to the dowry system.

    Anyway, I thought I’d address a couple of things in other people’s comment:

    The term Overseas Filipino Workers (OFW) Remittances is misleading. BSP calls it OF remittances as in Overseas Filipino (not Workers) remittances which include all foreign individual remittances from “Filipinos.” But the “Filipino” is also misleading. 57% of the remittances come from North America, from balikbayan who are more likely to be American or Canadian citizens. There are only a few contract workers in North America in relation to the size of the Filipino American or Canadian communities. Also, any American, Canadian or any other foreigner married to a Filipino who sends money to the country are also included in that “OFW” remittances (e.g. to buy a condo, build a house, support a family, monthly bank transfers from pensions) At a Fil-Am forum, we analyzed the numbers of BSP and POEA, and we all came to the same conclusion, at least 55% of remittances come fron non OFW’s.

    In terms of real OFW’s, the biggest remittances come from merchant marine, which come to about 3 b, or approximately $12,000 per capita annually. The bulk of the POEA labour export are in low and semi skilled workers who probably do not make more than a thousand a month. (I know people making as low as $300 per month. A news item for jobs by a middle east agency sanctioned by POEA were offering something like $500-$700 per month in Iraq, in high risk situations.) POEA deals with myths not with hard numbers.

    As for a comment about required remittances from OFW, that was true during the Marcos regime (which started POEA). At that time according to graduates of that program (now in Canada) they were required to remit a certain % to their family via PNB (only), and 10% to be kept at a savings account. That was the time when PNB was Imelda’s private atm. That all changed after people power. Now, I understand why the country is still on the UN’s list of countries with human trafficking problems. It’s called POEA.

    As for the brides for sale, shush….POEA might hear of it, there goes your love life.

    Alex

    • Thanks Alex..somehow I don’t see myself OFW..but I do send money for b-day gifts & xmas to friends and relatives. I do think too that I’d be doing this hopefully for a long time.

  11. LoL ,, back on the question how would I feel if Philippines did something similar?

    I wouldn’t care personally I’m already married and shes got all my money anyway :0

    As for others If they did something like that the price would have to be lower then 55k holly sh*t thats a lot of cash for a bride lol That would have to be some pretty good… Umm ok ill stop there.

  12. If something like this happened in the Philippines, I think this would solve the problem of marrying outside the country for the most part. My gosh only a very few could or would put up that large amount of cash for a bride.

    • Hi Jake – I didn’t realize that marrying outside the country was a “problem”. Shouldn’t two people who love each other be able to marry each other? Why is that a problem? Just curious.

  13. Sorry Bob to go off-topic but at least it’s in a different direction :). I’ve always been a little surprised at the apparently high incidence of expat marriages here as opposed to de facto relationships, but maybe it’s because the small number of expats who post in the various forums are not a representative sample.

    In Australia now, about 50% of people in permanent relationships have never married and none of my asawa’s family here has married (partly because they can’t afford it and in some cases because they don’t have birth certificates). I’ve offered to remove the financial problem but nobody seems terribly interested, to the extent I’ve stopped mentioning it. One sister planned to tie the knot a few months ago at a free mass ceremony organised by the mayor, but they cancelled when her partner had to work. Nobody cared much.

    Not being married seems to have certain legal advantages – for example, you and your partner are arguably separate legal entities who can enter into contracts with each other about property, which is not the case if you are married – and it avoids the potential problems that might arise if the relationship goes sour.

    Obviously it’s a decision for each individual but I am surprised that most of the expat community seem to take it for granted that a serious relationship with a Filipina will end in marriage.

    • Hi Ken – For me… I am the marrying type… probably would never be interested in a long term relationship that did not involved marriage. It’s a personal preference, though, and I don’t fault anybody who did either route. To bring this back to the article (I have no problem with veering to a related topic, btw), in the case of this article, marriage would be required in most cases in order to make immigration possible.

  14. That’s crazy. I see two drives behind it though:

    Greed for money.

    …or

    Trying to apply some type of theocracy.

  15. Theocracy is a form of government in which a god or deity is recognized as the state’s supreme civil ruler,[1] or in a higher sense, a form of government in which a state is governed by immediate divine guidance or by officials who are regarded as divinely guided

    Uh, we are talking about a proposed law that would charge foreigners a fee if they wanted to marry Indonesian Muslim [ maybe all?] women . You lost me this time jawz ! lol

    But then again, I admit that I did have to look up the definition of Theocracy haha

    • Hi Ian, what I meant by it is just that. Haha. Indonesia is a country with mostly Islamic people. In many places, some will uphold Islamic laws within the gov’t. Divorce I know is restricted in many religions, but I dunno if money deals with breaking the law of divorce in Islam. I also remember reading Indonesia has good religious freedom, so maybe #2 was just a loose theory. 😛 I think #1 makes more sense though.

  16. Hi bob well dont let the australian government hear about this ,they are trying to put a supertax on the mining industry at the moment ,next they will be taxing men who want to marry women fom other countries seeing we have such GOOD relationship with indonesia as we keep retreiving there boasts from the north west coast full of people maybe the government here should lok at taxing the indonesians for every person that comes here on one of there boats hmmm.anyway to get back to your post ken wrote that in australia 50% of people in a relationship have never been married i dont know the figures so i wont dipute them but to get a lady here into the country is as you may well know is very expensive but if you love the girl it doesnt matter my wife is just on the verge of getting her permanent residency here then in two years she can if she wishes become an australian citisen lots of people dont it doesnt bother me either way but whhat i cant understand in kens post is that and i know this is true that philipinos are very religous so how can they live together without being husband and wife ? wouldnt this be classed as a sin in the eyes of the church? i am just a bit confused about the religous veiw of living together ,here it is just a way of life no one much cares but i would have thought in such a devout catholic domain as the phillipines it would be frowned upon
    chris

    • Hello Chris, don’t believe that Filipinos are all very religious so they bother themselves w/ church wedding. The reality is most Filipinos are poor. Church wedding entails cost. Even if mass weddings are sponsored, still not everyone can avail of this. Catholicism in the Phil (or elsewhere I think) is not a rigid religion like Islam. So seeing “live-in” relationships is not uncommon. There’s no judgment. We are aware that there must be reasons why.

    • Sorry just want to interrupt you Chris, the boat people from Indonesia actually are from Middle east and Africa, why would the Oz government taxing for every Indonesian coming to the down under?anyway just to give you the facts straight – Cheers

  17. My guess is that only less 1 % of husbands would be able to come up with that amount of hard cash. If I was marrying my pinay wife when this came to effect I would have to put a second mortgage on my house…
    Nope, I would not, there would be no pinay wife, I would have a extremely hard time to convince myself to give someone 1/10 of that amount ($5500) interest free for next 10 years with very little chance to ever see it again (I don’t trust any government).

  18. You guys are reading it wrong. It means that for the cost of $55000 you can trade in your wife for a newer model. ( Kidding, kidding) . It seems to me that no matter where you are in the world, governments can help butting into your business and try and get as much money out of you as possible. Its was only a matter of time before some government tried to tax falling in love.

    • There are only two things in life that are certain, Allan… death and taxes! Who said that? I think it might have been Ben Franklin, but didn’t take the time to look it up!

  19. Bob, I was not going to reply as most issues have been covered but Allan’s comment about “only a matter of time before some government tried a tax for falling in love”. In a sense they do tax you for falling in love. Let me explain my twisted logic. Upon falling in love there are many dinners, gifts, etc to display ones love-sales tax. Then when the loving couple decide to become married they do need to apply to the state for a marriage license. A fee is attached to that license which is in essence a tax. So in a way there is a tax for your hormones taking over and doing what is natural between two loving people. Allow me a small alternative thought. In the past I have joked they tax us on everything except the air we breath. Well that is also about to change with the proposed tax called “CAP and TRADE”. I find it amazing that government has now found a way to tax even the air we breath. Why in the world do we allow governments to do this?

    • Hi Ron – It is true that the government (any government) will tax you as much as they can, in any way they can! It’s something you can always count on!

      • In BC, they have figured out a way to tax the air we breathe. Your car must pass “Aircare” ( emissions control) before you can buy insurance. If you have an old car, every year for $24.00. If you have a newer car, every two years for – you guessed it – $48.00. If your car fails the test, you must have it tuned up at an authorized repair shop – $350.00. Now, we all want clean air, but if your car still fails, you can still use it after you tune it up
        ($350.00) and Aircare it twice ($96.00). Is this about clean air or taxes?

        • Actually if it fails you only have to spend the amount required to ensure it meets the pollution standards. And if you dont make it comply you can NOT still use it because ICBC will not issue you insurance. It is definitely NOT a tax because you always have a choice – either make it comply or take the bus !! lol No one forces you to drive a car that pollutes so much it cant pass Aircare.

          • Hi Bob;
            The Smog test went up to P 450.00 this year in Bataan, I was there the other day and passed, but I was wondering how the Jeepney in front of me pouring out black smoke, passed also.Maybe Jeepneys are treated special, as they are spraying the mosquitoes

            • I agree Paul! I see Jeepneys spewing black smoke day in and day out, but somehow they still pass the emissions test and get licensed! I really don’t understand that!

              • Re the black smoke. In Vancouver nearly all private vehicles run on gasoline and not diesel, but the buses run on diesel [ or electricity]. People were complaining about the black discharge from the buses and apparently testing showed that altho diesel exhaust is more visible it is less polluting tha the discharge from a gasoline engine.
                Of course in most modern countries we use clean diesel, and the “dirty” diesel which is sold and used in the Philippines is outlawed. I understand that newer diesel motors in the Phil have problems buring the dirty diesel due to the injectors clogging up.
                In Canada diesel currently costs more than gasoline, whereas they are able to sell the dirty diesel in the Phil for about 25% less than the cost of gasoline, so it is no wonder that diesel is so popular here.

              • They are phasing out 2 stroke engine Trikes (only a few left) up here in Olongapo, and all new motorcycles are 4 stroke engines. Less smog and noise, things improve, albeit slowly.

  20. hi bob
    the new proposed law, regarding language, in the uk is in fact in existence in all but name. the government here requires all who wish to become british citizens to take a citizenship test to prove they have a knowledge of the country and therefore by default of the language. this has come about due to the high cost of supplying interpreters throughout our system whether legal, healthcare or any other involvment with government agencies. as you rightly say the standard of english in the philippines is so good, my wife sailed through as would many others.
    i somehow feel paying money smacks of modern day slavery, yet unfortunately there must be a few cases where it may be justified

    keep up the good work and still looking forward to meeting you

    • Hi paul – Actually, on the language regulations in the UK, I am not even talking for citizenship, it’s required for immigration to the UK. It sounds like you support that, am I right? If so, do you plan to learn either Tagalog or Bisaya before moving to the Philippines. It would only be fair, right? 😆

      • The present constitution, ratified in 1987, states that Filipino and English are both the official languages of the country. So no need to learn Tagalog to comply legally or even to be fair, diba?
        As I understand it, the USA has no official language.

        • Ha ha… this is what I expected somebody to argue…. congrats, John, you are the first! 😆

          I am not talking about the language where if you go to court or something it will be used. I am talking about the language of the streets where you live. The language where you can have a conversation with your neighbors. The language that will improve the quality of your life in the Philippines. That’s not going to be English, believe me.

          • I know, I live in Davao where I always try to talk to my neighbours in the own language only to be replied to in broken English. I have not taken any formal course but I keep my ears open and a after a few beers the differences seem to melt away.
            Every morning I take a morning run round the subdivision with a Filipino Mariner, when he is on leave, our conversations are always in English.
            Many Filipinos I meet are terribly embarrassed about the fluency in English but with a little coaxing I can usually get them to realise that it is not as bad as they think (grammer aside). Being an Englishman myself, we generally expect everyone else to adopt our tongue instead of adopting the “When in Rome” attitude to the local language.
            Your right about the quality of life being enhanced by even attempting to converse in the local dialects.

            • Hi John – You are so right about that… being able to speak the language is really something that makes life way, way better. The day that I started taking classes was the day that my life got a lot better here!

      • no im with you i dont support that idea at all.
        my hopes are to learn bisayas when i arrive, as you say it is the right and respectful thing to do

  21. so, if this indonesian law were enacted a few decades back, it would have greatly affected present day US all the way to the top. i’m not sure ann dunham soetero would have had the money to relocate to indonesia and marry her indonesian husband. trippy.

    waaaittaminute….

    if this law existed in the philippines post ww2, an irish-american miner may not have had the cash to immigrate here & marry his bicolana wife. lolo & lola — and my mom & i would not have existed!

    ok, not cool. bad law. baaad law.

  22. Bob,
    Maybe a law simular to this might be benificial in a way. Let just think outside the box for a moment shall we.
    How many women in these asain countries post themselves on the internet, magazines and other forms of advertisment seeking marriage to someone other than their own countrymen.
    Are they really in it for Love and Marriage or are they in it for monetary gain for them and their families and maybe personel escape from their own way of life in their country.
    Sad enough this is big business and their are many takers. Men in all stages of life especially older ones who are either looking to return to their youth by having a young lady by their side to inflat his ego or libido. They also bring them into their home not really for love but to be their personal care takers for when they get older.
    So Where is the courtship and relationship phase in all of this? Many talk on line and meet once or maybe twice and its on their of to never never land to live maybe or maybe not happily everafter. This sounds more like a business contract than a marriage.
    I guess I’m old fashion it took me three years and many many trips to the Philippines both on the ship and personnel leave before we got married. Not to mention all the red tape we had to jump through with the Philippine Goverment, US Navy and Immagration monetary expenditures. We have been married for over 30 yrs now and if I had to do it again I would.
    Monetary support and taking care of each other is part of Unconditional Love and not a negotiable clause in a contract.
    So why not make it alittle difficult to marry a forgeiner? I say you would have to prove you have taken 4 or 5 trip to see her in a two years period. You would also set up a trust fund for that lady incase thing don’t work out for about $5000 so she could get her life back on track.
    Maybe many people won’t agree with me but it sure would slow down the use of marriage as a business transaction. I know that their are many forgien marrages that do last forever regardless of age, but their are a hugh number that do not sad to say.
    Remember I said a trust fund to her not the Goverment!

    • Hi Michels – You were successful the way you did it. You came here many times before you married. Now, you have been married 30 years. I am happy it worked out for you. In my case, I married Feyma the first time I ever came to the Philippines. We have been married for 20 years now, so I think we have had some success. Now, though, you are saying that I should be forced to do what you did. Why? What you did was good for you, what I did was good for me. Why should I be forced to do it your way?

      I say that the Govt should just butt out and leave personal lives to the individual to decide. I would no more force you than I think you should force me.

      Just my personal view….

      • Hi Bruce;
        I must agree with Bob on this one. I don’t want to live in an Orwellian World where the governments controls that much of our life. We suffer enough of “Big Brother”, why ask for more?

        • Hi Guys,
          Glad to see that you read my post and responded the way I thought you would.
          Remember I was thinking outside the box and playing the Devil’s Advocate on this one.
          I do agree that Goverment should stay out of our personnel lives as much as possible.
          I also believe that marriage is a personnel choice regardless of how it might look to the outside world.
          Like I said above I know of alot of fil/am marriages that are the real deal like ours and we are really blessed regardless of how long it took to get married. To tell you the truth I asked my wife to Marry Me the first time we meet over at Gains Beach in subic it just took three years to get everything done thanks to military obligations. (Iran Hostage crisis) . I just shake my head though when I hear about a couple who married for convience or personnel gain and it end in divorce. But than again that’s personnel choice.

  23. People talk about how some of the local ladies are scammers- just looking to make some money from unwary foreigners. And its true that some- but certainly not all of them are. But just imagine the situation if every foreigner had to guarantee every potential wife a 250,000 php trust fund !!! lol You wouldnt be able to find an empty seat in any internet cafe in the Philippines !! lol
    I think we should all be responsible, but when you say “get her life back on track”- you are of course talking about her previous life with no income or maybe 200 pesos a day income. Thats a long way from winning the 250,000 peso bridal lottery that you suggest !! haha

    • As I said I was just thinking outside the box. Didn’t expect to get BBQ’d over it but that’s cool and some of it is even funny.

  25. Hi Bob,

    I think a P 2M ” marriage tax ” would be counter-productive to the Treasury of the Philippine Gov’t as it would certainly discourage Kanos from marrying Filipinas.

    The way it is now a Filipina who marries a Westerner and moves overseas will eventually contribute at least P 2M in help, balikbayan boxes and remittances back to family in the Philippines over the course of her life anyways. I think the Philippine Gov’t sees this already so no need to worry about them copying the Indonesians.

    • Hi Randall – I fully agree with you, except the part about the Philippine government. Filipinos think that P2M is just pocket change for us.

  26. Hi Bob – IMHO, this is just another name for “Dowry/Dower”. The only difference is the goverment get to keep the money(for the bride)(good luck in getting it back). This has been going on for hundred of years in Asia and some parts of Europe. Prohibited in most countries perhaps but still it’s happening today in India and Pakistan and maybe even in the Philippines. Some call it “gifts/presents/good faith” but the couple gets to keep it not the goverment.

  27. My Mom used to say say….”You’re worth more than gold”, and at my age I have not fetched anything remotely close to what I am worth…hahaha. Maybe we could all advertise ourselves for a price and see if there are any takers hahaha.

    I think this a case of another government seeking a way to add to their coffer during these economic times. It’s amazing to me the ways local…state….and federal, can figure out a way to tax a product or service. I don’t think it’s too far fetched that sometime in the future they will tax us for the air we breathe based on body weight and intake hahaha. Someone has to pay for the guy sitting in an office figuring out how to get more money out of the common man, and providing loopholes for the priveledged.

    Anyway….that was my rant for the day…..and it was free!

    Greg

    • Hi Greg – Without a doubt, the Government (every government) is always looking for ways to take more of our money. I’m with you… that is what this is all about!

  28. Bob;
    I was looking at the picture of the Bridal Party, and noticed that the only two not smiling were the Bride and groom.

  29. I don’t know…it’s an interesting scenario. First, it would radically reduce the number of foreign/filipina marriages. $52,000 is a lot of money to some folks, no matter how much they love the girl. They might be able to scrape enough together to cover it, but it would be a struggle.

    I think it would actually reduce the amount of money flowing into the Philippine economy as well. First, a lot of guys marry their brides there (as I did) and spent a good deal of money (by Philippine standards) on the wedding. Quite a few agencies, including local government and the church got a good cut too. So, right off the bat, reduced number of wedding means less economic activity.

    The big one though would be the loss from remittances to the Filipina’s family. I’m sure virtually every couple sends money back home to the family….some more than others. But if those marriages don’t happen, that money doesn’t come into the economy.

    Bottom line, I think it would hurt the economy and government receipts more than it would help.

  30. A 2.2 mil peso marriage tax? I’m thinking the Pino government would be smarter than that. LMAO, I’ve spent over 3 mill here in four years, I’d look elsewhere if a tax like that existed in the Pines, for instance.

    If that would be the case, market forces would prevail, why not pop over to Singapore and buy a certified virgin for $10,000 US at least a fifth of the price cheaper and you could buy another 4 more times till your reach the opportunity cost in the Pines or Indo? Not interested in Singapore? Take a trip to certified brides in Thailand, Vietnam or Malaysia can be foud much much cheaper.
    Don’t like the Asian based model? Well, Estonia and Russia are offering a wide range of brides for half the price? So don’t worry fellas there’s plenty of choices in the market place!!!

    • Boss,
      You’re a d-bag.

      But I see what you’ve been doing with your comments in this site (re: Feyma’s article). Trying to get any form of attention, even the internet kind, must be helping you go through life, sad as it probably is.

      Very well then. Everyone’s free to have an opinion, but try using your real name next time. It will make you look like less of a wimp.

  31. Bob- I asked before if BOSS was Richard but dont think I got an answer, and only you have access to the IP addresses
    What did you call him last time? I think it was a Troll !