Knotty? Bob, don’t you mean naughty?
No, indeed I mean knotty. Filipinos are knotty, and it bothers me! 🙂
What am I talking about? Filipinos like to tie knots in everything. You go to the grocery store and buy some groceries, when you get home every single bag is tied into a knot on the top! Filipinos love to tie knots. I hate them. The knots, not the Filipinos.
I’ve been dealing with Filipinos and their knots for more than 20 years now, and it’s getting old. Ever since I’ve known her, Feyma has been tying things into knots. It angers me. I almost lose control and go crazy. So far, I’ve been able to hold the anger in, but it is close to bursting!
Why does it make me so angry? I’ll admit, I am jealous. You see, when we come home with groceries and the bags are tied into knots, I will try and try and I can’t get the knot untied! Finally I give up, and I watch as Feyma comes over and does something, and within less than a split second the bag is opened! It’s not torn open or cut open, no. The knot is untied. It all happens so fast, a quick flick of her fingers on the bag and it is opened.
Oh, you are thinking that I should ask her to show me how to untie those secret Filipino knots, right? Well, believe me, I have asked her many times over the years. I’m not complaining about Feyma (although I do sometimes!), she shows me how to do it. But, even if she demonstrates very slowly and clearly, I still can’t figure out how to untie those knots! No, if Feyma is not around, I admit, I just pull it apart with brute force! If I can’t tear it apart, I’ll use scissors. I can never untie it though!
I got thinking about this today, because Feyma bought some Ube Mamon at Red Ribbon, and I wanted to have one for a snack. Of course, when I picked up the bag, it had a ribbon (a Red one, can you imagine, Red Ribbon Bake Shop is so tricky!) that tied the bag closed with one of those tricky Filipino knots. I was so mad that I lost my appetite. Well, when Feyma saw me struggling with it, though, she came and instantly untied the ribbon and gave me a Mamon, though. My appetite came back after that! 😉
Yeah, over the years these Filipino knots have bothered me and worn on me. Knotty Filipinos!
Now that I think of it, I can only think of one other habit that Filipinos have that makes me angrier. Want to know what it is? Just give a Filipino a roll of scotch tape, step back and watch what happens. They love using tape, and are very liberal in their use of tape! In fact, during Christmas I loaned Feyma my tape dispenser from my desk, something that I rarely will do. Know what? Next time I sat down at my desk and needed a piece of scotch tape, I looked up and the roll was empty. Sus! Grabe. Where is my scotch tape? Oh, yeah… I loaned it to Feyma. Between scotch tape and knots, it could destroy our marriage!
Ah heck Bob….just use the scissors or get one of those baby box cutters and carry around in your pocket and cut knot out fast if you can not untie….and I quess you are going to have to break down and buy Feyma Her very own tape dispenser ! Save on the stress level there..LOL
Give Feyma her own tape dispenser? You think she doesn’t have one? Ha ha… she has a tape dispenser that holds a roll of tape 3 times the size of mine! But, she still likes to use my tape! Ha ha…. 😉
Bob
At least you don’t have to ever worry about anything falling out of the bags hahaha. You know its just one of the quirks that makes the Philippines a different and wonderful place to live and you wouldn’t want to live anywhere else. Interesting article!
Indeed, Randy, a wonderful place to live!
I don’t really have any problem with the knots. I either untie them or rip them open. Usually they have a bow that when pulled on opens the knot. Scotch tape I don’t use here and when I do, I borrow my asawa’s. She seems to have the smallest rolls in existance. Filipinos have small hands so my big Kano hands give me problems with a lot of things here. Solution – let them do it, but that is tough on my Kano ego. I am used to being the handy man. Have patience, don’t let the small things get your blood pressure up.
Nah, it doesn’t affect my blood pressure… maybe you didn’t pick up on it, but this article was more of a joke…. just based on reality, though! 😆
Hahaha knots! one of those little quirky things that makes life interesting in the Philippines. One thing is for sure, the shop assistants make sure nothing ever falls out or they make sure nothing ever gets back in again. Lol.
The Gordian knot should be renamed the Pinay Knot. That’s where a pair of Swiss Army knifed come in handy.
Truth is, Boss, I have a little tiny pair of very sharp scissors that I keep right next to my easy chair to take care of those knots! I think I do need that Swiss Army Knife to keep in my pocket!
Morning Bob!
Stop chewing your fingernails, mate! Or are your fingers just too big & clumsy? I noticed the penchant over there for tying and taping. What annoyed me the most was how slow they were in doing all this unneccessary packing when you just wnated to get out of the place. It is as if they were packaging for a move overseas or something rather than just a taxi ride home. Have a good day, Bob.
I am not sure what it is, Lee, but I can never open those knots! Feyma, though… just a quick pull and it’s open! Yeah, I hate standing there at the checkout while they tie all of those little knots! Wait, wait, wait… it annoys me! 😉
HI Bob! That was hilarious. I didn’t realize Filipinos were that knotty! Grocery store baggers have two kinds of knots: one that can be untied by just pulling one end, some sort of incomplete ribbon. The other one is a complete knot where you have to pry them loose and sometimes it’s too tight I just get the scissors too.
Hi Cathy – Maayong buntag! Yes, Filipinos are very knotty! See there.. you say there is one knot that “can be untied by just pulling one end” – but I can never untie it! I think you have to be a Filipino to know the secret! 😆 The scissors do come in handy!
Bob;
That natural ability to tie knots must be the reason Filipinos make good seaman!
And being a retired seaman, I have no trouble with the knots they tie in those plastic bags. Try this, carry the bags in from the car, go back to the car and gather some more, stall around until your wife has them all untied. Puff up your chest and loudly declare; “Whew. that was hard!”
After that is when I grab a beer and assume that “I’ve earned it look on my face.”
I’m retired I don’t do knots anymore.
There is an easy way out, Paul? Not you tell me! After 20+ years of having a hard time on those knots, and I could have been kicking back with a beer the whole time! Wow! 😉
Bob;
On the subject of beer, for years I’ve watched friends and neighbors here, open beer bottles with another beer bottle. I was perplexed as to how to do it, and wondered; “How do they open the 24th beer?” Then I saw them use their teeth.
Not to be outdone I was going to show how as a kid we’d open beer bottles using the chrome bumper of car, all I found was plastic bumpers now. But I carry a “church key” on my key chain now, after being embarrassed when my 10 year old niece had to open a beer for me. (I explained to her why she should never use her teeth to do it.)
Hi Paul – That opening one bottle with a second one is a real art, my friend! I’ve never been around to see the last one opened, because there was always another case on standby!
Wow Bob you really hit the nail on the head. I too was never taught how to tie a GOOD knot. I have yet to see someone here that couldn’t. Meriam can untie them and I have to rip or cut them apart. Life is good here in the PH.
Gary
Ha ha… like you, Gary, I can’t tie a good knot either. I was a Boy Scout, and I remember learning about knots, but that information has long since evaporated from my limited brain matter. Like you say, though, I think that everybody here can tie one!
I was a Boy Scout and I was in the Navy. Sadly, don’t ask me to tie anything more than my shoes! I wasn’t good at it then and I have not improved with age.
Hi Tom – I think that only two things improve with age… wine and cheese! Ha ha
And only good wine and cheese at that!
Bob;
You forgot to mention, us!
True enough, my friend… I was thinking of saving that for a follow up article! 😉
I am Knot sure what to make of this story? 😀
Hi Ray – You are a naughty man! Just thinking about this topic had me tied up in knots!
Keen observation as always. Now it is stuck with me. I must have been ignoring it. 🙂
Hi Jeff – Ha ha…. you were probably repressing it out of embarrassment! Not being able to untie one of those knots can feel demeaning! 😉 Just kidding…
Bob – Now I understand the whole knot thing, so it just isn’t my better half!
Hi Bill – Nah, it’s a secret Filipino thing… I think they learn it in school! 😉
Actually dad, we don’t learn those knots, either that or I wasn’t listening.
Since you are half American, son, I think the Filipinos are keeping it secret from you! 😉
Ha ha, Bob, I think Boys Scout are thought how to tie a knot.. a perfect knot. A good knot.. not grocery type knot. 🙂
Yeah, they teach lots of knots… but I’m too old, I already forgot that!
Knots, something that I use a lot of as a rock climber. The knots that they use can be easy to untie if you know the right one to pull. If you pull the wrong one you only make the knot tighter. Well just untie yourself and relax, just make sure you pull the right one. 🙂
Ha ha… you are probably right on that one!
The one time someone doesn’t tie a knot in your bag will be the time everything falls out when you walk out of the store. So thank goodness for knots!
You’ve got a point there, Darin!
Bob,
Although I hate the knots also, I find it rather amusing at how well they know how to tie these knots. As you said everything we get from the store there is tied in a knot. I even bought some nails from the hardware store and they threw them in a bag and tied it in a knot! My eagerness to show off my “Machoness” with a hammer waned as I had to let my little wife untie the knot in the bag before I could begin hammering!
Ha ha… yes, Steve, your manly-hood was a bit deflated by having to ask your wife to open the bag! I know the feeling well! 😆
Nice!
Glad you like it.
lol!! that was a funny article but yeah i agree, we filipinos are sooo knotty 😀
I know sometimes you have to think hours, what your going to write next, hahaha you really pulled one “out of the bag” ..very true article, I remember Xmas and the scotch tape thingy. Heee.. yeah.. alot of scotch tape bit the dust. As for the knots, I just incorporate them into my daily excercise rouutine… keeps my biceps in shape…
Hi Lenny – Truth is, I rarely have trouble coming up with something to write about. In fact, I often have a hard time choosing between several articles that I wish to write. The topics are around me every day that I live in the Philippines. If it’s not an experience I had in daily life, then it can be found in the newspaper or any number of other places. 😆
Yeah, I bet that the tape companies make big money during Christmas time here! 😉
Dear Bob,
Right on; so true! I loved your article about the knots and Mezalin thought it was hilarious. This has been going on with us for 16 years now. Darin is right though, there are reasons for tying the bags so everything isn’t scattered all over, the bag is easy to carry, and so someone doesn’t dip into the bag. Also, even though I cannot untie Mezalin’s knots I can tie my own in bags that previously I would not have able to. Even though the bag does not appear to be large enough to tie, if you twist the opposite ends and pull them together the result can be a knot where I wouldn’t have thought it possible.
Hi Dave – How are you doing this morning? I hope you are enjoying your stay here!
You know, I may be wrong, but I always thought that the reason they tie the knots in the bags at the stores is to make it harder for people to steal things and slip them into the bag. As a former retailer, that is how I always saw it. But, maybe it is a service to keep you from spilling the contents, I am not sure!
You are right that they seem to be able to tie knots into any bag, regardless of how full it might be! 😆
Hi Bob,
Ha Ha sooo funny,i have the same problem here in the UK,many small independant stores like my Green Grocers tie knots in the bags,i gave up trying to open the knots years ago,just rip them open,lol.
The other thing that annoys me,is that tight shrink wrap plastic on boxes and packages that i can never open without stabbing the scissors through it,lol.
regards,Chas.
Funny,i just thought of something that makes me cringe.Sheryl will insist on opening tins with a sharp knife,even when there are tin openers around,lol.
Hi Chasdv – The shrink wrap has never bothered me… so far anyway! The knots drive me up a wall, though! 😆
Hi Bob,
When I first moved here in Jan and bought some groceries, I thought it was a clever idea that the plastic bag had the little straps to tie a knot. But then, I too got pissed when trying to break them so now just leave a knife on the counter.
Now I usually bring my back pack with me to carry my groceries to save on the plastic wastage.
The only thing that gets on my nerves is always being called sir, even my staff although I ask to be called by my first name.
Don
Hi Don – Well, I must admit that I am lucky as I don’t generally have to worry about groceries, bags and such.. Feyma does a wonderful job of handling stuff like that!
Hi Minda – Ha ha… yes, you are very knotty! How are you doing, my friend?
Its not just the knots and tape Bob – have you ever tried to re-pack a suitcase that your wife has packed? I think it must be due to long years of practice with balikbayan boxes but when my wife packs for me I am unable to get everything back in. Filipina have a gift for being able to fill a box or suitcase so that every last cubic centimetre is filled – we westerners have not been born with this talent unfortunately!
Oh yes… I forgot about that, Bryan, but you are sure right!
Thats true for all asians. My wife is an expert packer. But that backfired when she was too efficient with the suitcase and was 20kg over the limit! Told her no point of buying large suitcases due to excess baggage…
Bob,
Maybe becoz during the early yrs, filipinos didn’t have have a scissors or scotch tape that’s why everything used hands and they’re very good at tying and untying the knots, they even use their teeth to untie the knots ,hahaha…
Actually, Rebecca, that theory is probably the best I could imagine. I think you might be right! Don’t worry, lots of us westerners use our teeth to open stuff! 😆
love the article. i guess we’re not ony ” knotty” but “tapey” as well.
i’m good Bob…and i hope you too and Feyma…happy valentines to both 🙂
OMG, that was a perfect post. You nailed it! Filipinos are the master of twine and old cardboard boxes too. It’s astounding what they can pack in a piece of worn cardboard and some old…anything, at hand, resembling any sort of cord really.
My darling wife amazed me once when she went to fetch a live chicken at market once for a special family lunch occasion. She took very dilapidated looking box from a trash pile and found some of that yellow, fiberglass packing cord you see wrapped around heavy industrial equipment that’s been shipped in cardboard in the same pile. She then went to market and came home with the box bound in a series of wraps and knots I couldn’t even begin to comprehend. It was amazingly sturdy…the box would hop around a bit every minute or 2…but I would never have guessed she got a chicken into it and the box sat on my lap all they way to her family home…about an hours drive, without drawing the least bit of notice in the multicab. Then, when we got to her family home, she didn’t cut the cord…it could be used again and so could the box…she just ‘untied’ it while lifting the chicken out in a fluid movement that was amazing.
I think they are on to something here.
Hi rc – be careful on your wording.. I didn’t “nail it,” I “tied it in a knot!” Ha ha… just kidding..
You are right about using any old piece of cardboard from a trash pile, and a few knots here and there, it’s a box again! Ha ha… Filipinos are very inventive!
Hilarious! But then, it’s a hard habit to break. On grocery stores where there are no baggers, I always unconsciously tie knots on plastic bags…even if not necessary!
Hi Katrina – I’m too lazy to tie all of those knots!
Hi Allan – Glad you enjoyed it! Tapey…. I suppose, but more knotty, though! 🙂
Hi again Bob,
Yes, we are enjoying ourselves but have been very busy. Bryan G. is correct about the packing. Two years ago security at the small Elmira, NY airport opened one of our suitcases, boy, were they sorry! It took about 20 minutes and 5 of them on the floor (with everyone laughing at them) before they managed to get everything inside and the suitcase latched.
Filipinas may be good at tying knots in bags, but how good will they be with the switchover to paper bags!
Ha ha… that’s a good way to get back at those TSA boys, Dave!
Thank you, Minda, and Happy Valentines to you also!
lol bob
so u have meet a knotty filipina as i have been married to two filipina in my life time and know 100s more here and over there i do find some off them have funny little ways that yes if i must say it here it pees u right off mate and after 7 years with my wife and know all her funny ways thay stiill make me mad at times and one off them is puting on a new shorts it dont metter i fi had them on for 5 mins she till make me put on a new one if we was going out lol and thinks like that lol all the best with ur knotty filipina and god bless……peter martin tassie
Hi peter – to be honest, it doesn’t bother me, this article was all in good fun!
Hi Bob, not just knotty on bags but if you noticed in the market place? Any fruits or vegetables that have stems or extra stems or twigs are either knotty tied or braided. Other loose vegetables are tied in portions or bundled i.e., Garlic, jicamas. Anything that can be hang is hanged-green mango, lanzones, bananas, long beans, ampalaya, etc. It’s a knotty world out there. But I don’t care how tight they tie those plastic bags, it’s no match to the probing drum sticks” of those security guards in the entrance of Gaisano! lol!
BTW Bob, if the scotch tape is giving you hard time, maybe you should consider borrowing Paul T.’s Duct Tape, it has a positive effect on him, ha ha ha.
Actually, as I wrote the article I was thinking about the duct tape and hoping that Filipinos don’t gain a widespread knowledge of the stuff! 😯
If Filipinos starts using Duct tape, desperate measure to open—chain saw?
It could be, Mars! Without a doubt! 😉
Bob..I am surprized that Fillipinos not all ready use Duck or Duct tape there. If they discover it and handy to get….I am sure you will see it on motos and trikes and jeepneys and even hold windows in houses and etc……wow..maybe you need to be a Duct or Duck tape whole saler there…….
Duct tape is not widely known or used here from what I can tell. I don’t recall ever really seeing it here, or if so maybe only once or twice, I don’t recall. You are right, Dan, if I could become a wholesaler and then make it widely know… well, I could be a millionaire! 😆
You should have seen how filipinos duct taped a balikbayan box here in Dubai Bob. 😀
Even me used 2 big rolls of it on just one box!
That’s true, Rey. I remember Feyma used to be a mean duct taper back in the States when packing a balikbayan box! 😀
Hi Mars – I love it when we pass through the market, or a fruit stand along the road, and all of the fruits are hanging from the rafters by a string! You don’t see that back in the States!
Ha ha When I was there last year, I bought a Saba saging for steaming and the vendor has to take the whole string of bananas wrap around the post of his fruit stand to give a bunch. No, nothing hanging here on the states, just on the counter and tables during the summer farmers market.
Hi Mars – I wonder what Americans would think if some Pinoy at a farmer’s market or something set up his booth like that. They might like it!
On our farmer’s market, there’s a Filipino lady married to a Mexican farmer, since they travel to different farmers market, they have this flimsy tent and not strong to hang fruits or veggies. But if they start hanging and arranging their fruits like you in PH, somebody will probably call the Smithsonian or the Gallery of Arts in DC, ha ha ha .
Ha ha… I can see it now, having those boys from the Smithsonian Institute out there taking pictures and surveying the fruit stand! Ha ha Good one, Mars!
..and using these words to describe while puffing their pipes: abstract, captivating, mystical expression, rhythmic flowing work, existential, etc. ha ha ha .
Bob, your article was funny and very true!!!… My wife Margie is from Davao and she ties things in knots here in the US now as she did in the Phils….its just a filipina thing i guess, but i love her for it…..
Remember Bob … knotty people do naughty things .. Bob remember that you are in the Philippines now not Kansas..hee hee just go with the flow .. Phil R.
Kansas? Heck, Phil, this isn’t even Michigan! 😯
Hi Bob!
I had laughs reading your Knots blog. I guess it is like second nature to us whenever we have plastic bags or anything that knotting (is this a right word?) could be practiced. And your use of “Sus, Grabe”, that must have taken its toll already. And I’m sure, you were just kidding about its effects (and that of the dispensable tape) on your marriage, eh?! Simple topic written well and funny. I did not know that it becomes irritating in the long run, ha….the knots, Pinoy way!!
Alf
Hi alf – I’m glad that you enjoyed my article today. I enjoyed writing it too. And, yes, I was just kidding about the marriage part! 😉
Just a guess Bob but I bet you are not a Rubiks cube sort of guy!
I bored of the rubik’s cube years ago, Tony, after I figured out how to solve it. Seriously. 😆
Hi Jeff, we all have things that make us unique, and the knot thing, indeed, is one of the many things that makes Filipinos different from us! It is refreshing.
That’s not a Filipino trait Bob, it’s a woman thing, where ever in the world they are. I hide my tape, or it would never be there when I need it.
Hi Larry – Haha not sure if I can agree on that, Larry… here in the Philippines the men and the women do it! Like the bag boys at the grocery store! Tape… yeah, that’s a woman thing, I think!
funny but this is so true bob. I can relate to your anger and it drives me really crazy while untying those knots…Had a friend who loves to keep everything in a plastic bag and ties it very tigtly which ends me up opening those stuff with scissors.
Ha ha… I’m not really angry about it, Neggie… this article was really just a joke.
Hey Bob – Good title. Good funny (Red ribbon, using red ribbon.. but of course he he) and oh so true article about knots and scotch tapes! I was laughing reading. Every single grocery store I go to not just SM, they will always tie grocery bags into knot. There is the handle, then there is the strings too, to tie the knot. I think it’s to make sure nothing falls. It sure is irritating when you can’t untie the knot! Good thing there’s always wife on your side. The tie that binds. He he.
Glad you enjoyed it, sugar!
Bob,
I am surprised you haven’t master the knots yet since you were going to open a fish market last April.
I know I would get myself in trouble if I used scissors on the plastic. (Plastic bag – patayyyyy). Nothing is wasted including the plastic bags and I am sure that I would have ruined them. We have a plastic bag problem here in the US. The bags are folded carefully and stored in a drawer but there are so many of them that I have been secretly throwing some away. I think Walmart, Giant and Safeway should get some training on bagging groceries with knots from some local filipinos.
Ha ha… everybody can always remember that fish market, but that was really just my April Fools joke last year! 😆
The knots are bad for me also as i have days when the fingers don’t get the message from the brain quite right but maybe that’s just age . 🙂
But it’s not just knots .. how about shampoo sachets that i can never get open while in the shower or milk cartons that have spouts designed to make you buy more milk , sooner , rather than later … 🙂
Maybe there are additional articles in this ramble somewhere …
Hi alan – You are going about it all wrong… on those shampoo sachets you are supposed to use your teeth to open! I think if you read the instructions on the packet, it specifically says to open with your teeth! 😆
I never gave it much thought but I do remember having to rip apart the tops of bags of things I bought at Gaisano, and probably elsewhere too. I remember the Gaisano bags specifically because of their shade of green. I fugured they tie them this way to prevent shoplifting. I do not specifically recall seeing the bags being tied as at the time the bagger ties them I may be fumbling with the cash or credit card paying for the stuff.
This will be something for me to watch for on a future visit ! Next time instead of tearing the bags open, I’ll try to remember to ask one of my Filipino friends to open it and just watch. I am going to look through some of the stuff I brought home with me and see if I still may have any of the torn open bags with the knot still in them for a closer look LOL .
Good article Bob, as usual ! Thanks
Hi Bob – Yep, I’m sure you will find plenty of those knots if you still have some Gaisano bags! Ha ha…. Good luck on untying them, though!
Didn’t take me long to find some of the knotted bags that I ripped open, the knots are still intact LOL ! There are also some that were not knotted too. This is something I will have to watch for on future visits to watch them tie the bags. I am sure I kind of noticed it but just didn’t pay that much attention to it at the time.
Some years ago I was complaining to my daughter in Scotland how much I hated modern packaging as I could never get the packages open – she replied it was understandable as when I was young everything came wrapped in a leaf!
Hi Bryan – Back when the wrapped things in a leaf things were much easier… wait… of course I don’t remember that! 😯
Bob, good to see Scotch tape is so popular there…as an employee of the 3M Company I am happy to see we are making a difference in your marriage…
Hi Bernie – And I thank you for that! You are holding us together! 😆 Now, can I get you to send me some free Post-It notes for all of the trouble you’ve put me through? 😉
I thought I was the only one who find these knots bothering. And worse , some seal them. Ironically, the plastic bags the store people staple have a sign , “Recyclable/Reusable”…but how can we reuse them if they’re sealed so tight that the only way to open them is to rend them? Ughhh…
Hi Bob, I hope you can find time to visit my blog and give me an opinion on my post about Filipinos’ obsession for “sachets.” http://www.ilovehateamerica.com/a_filipino_immigrants_lov/2011/02/-sachet-nation.html
Hi bingkee – I hate the things! Ha ha…. Yeah, you are right, how can you reuse them if you have to tear them all apart just to get your groceries? Crazy.
I’ll check out your sachet article… should be interesting.