We’ve talked a lot about hiring maids lately, and some comments and e-mails that I have gotten have asked more questions. Like, one person asked “what kind of things will the maid do for you?” Well, let’s look at that!
Firstly, the maid will do most any jobs that are needed in a common household. For instance, they might cook, clean up, assist in caring for the kids, run errands, etc. Consider that most things that are reasonable, the maid will do it. A good maid will do all these types of domestic jobs and won’t complain about it. That is her duty after all. Her service in these areas will extend to the husband, wife and all the kids in the household. Our kids are under strict instructions not to abuse the maid by talking bad to her, or by demanding that she do things that are not reasonable. When I need something done, the maid will handle it. Usually, if I have a particular job that I want the maid to take care of, I will tell Feyma, and let her pass it along to the maid.
Now, this brings us to another question – what kind of things should you NOT expect your maid to do. Well, firstly and most foremost – don’t expect to use the maid for sex. I know a lot of people (both foreigners and Filipinos) who do use their maids in this way. I have even had friends who practically brag about doing this with the maid. One guy told me a couple years ago that “when his girlfriend was not around, the maid was happy to take care of him.” My lord! This is not a smart thing to do. Firstly, morally it is just wrong. Secondly, if you do that with the maid, you are giving the maid a powerful tool that she can hang over your head. If she went to the Police and accused you of sexual misconduct you could easily end up in jail! Another thing – she might threaten Police action just as a way to shake you down for money! It is just not a good idea to have a sexual relationship with the maid. Don’t do it!
Think of this… if you need a girlfriend (or a wife!), it is very easy to find that here. As a foreigner, honestly, if you just go to the mall and hang around for a while, girls will approach you. I know, because it happens to me all the time. Well, I just tell them that I am already married and it makes most of them go away, although some say that they don’t care about that and they go after you that much harder. I guess what I am saying is that sex is available, and you don’t need the maid to get it. Using the maid for that not only will get you into serious trouble, but it will also mess up the working relationship and you won’t get good results in the area of work! So, take my advice – your maid and your girlfriend should be two different people.